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swingers

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can anyone enlighten me - I thought swinging had an element of 'different partners' defined as wife or partner swopping? So why are so many women pissed off when a bloke has a partner or a wife? Surely if you want to meet true single guys for a relationship then you would go on a dating website??

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!

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By *orthyorkypairCouple over a year ago

North Yorkshire

assuming your situation is you swing while your wife doesnt? if thats the case its not the fact you have a wife, its the likelyhood she is blissfully unaware of your activity that is upsetting some on here!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can anyone enlighten me - I thought swinging had an element of 'different partners' defined as wife or partner swopping? So why are so many women pissed off when a bloke has a partner or a wife? Surely if you want to meet true single guys for a relationship then you would go on a dating website??

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

I suppose the clue is in the title...swapping tends to suggest a reciprocal arrangement...they're not swapping if it's just you and them now really are they and nor are you...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

so are you saying to swing it must be consented?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

so now its reciprocal and consenting? I clearly have misunderstood the terminology x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" so now its reciprocal and consenting? I clearly have misunderstood the terminology x "

Lots of people have different definitions and many will be pedantic about the semantics...I make no judgements because many of us are not in the position to do so but basically, if you're meeting women to have sex outside of your relationship even if it is through a swinging site without the full knowledge of your partner, you can sprinkle as much stardust on it as you like but it's not really seem as swinging, certainly not seen as partner swapping and would be considered cheating in any circle including this one

Jane

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

an interesting perspective - so should this site be limited to those couples who have a consenting partner and all singletons and those without consent should be blocked? Surely people should be allowed to make their own choices? Is not one of the main reasons sites like this exist is for people to meet for sex regardless of personal constraints?

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By *elicious43Woman over a year ago

Wilts

" so now its reciprocal and consenting? I clearly have misunderstood the terminology x

Jane"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And not wanting to meet an attached male who's partner doesn't know is a personal choice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"an interesting perspective - so should this site be limited to those couples who have a consenting partner and all singletons and those without consent should be blocked? Surely people should be allowed to make their own choices? Is not one of the main reasons sites like this exist is for people to meet for sex regardless of personal constraints?"

people can make their own choices you choose to be here some will choose not to meet you

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I don't questions people choice not to meet - I question why so many people rant and have a go at blokes who are attached as if this isn't a swinging site?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you read my post you'll see that I'm clear that I'm not making any judgement...The state and terms and conditions of someone else's relationship is entirely their own business and nothing to do with me...We have friends on here both that we meet only socially and those we play with in all kinds of relationships and I am not in favour of any kind of restriction on members because everyone plays in different ways., but don't essentially use words such as partner swapping to justify things because people choose not to meet those who don't fit into their own, I suppose you could call it, moral code...and that may sound like an ironic term on a site such as this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We feel the same. All parties must know what each other is doing. Going behind a partners back is not swinging it's cheating , We don't meet attached men

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We feel the same. All parties must know what each other is doing. Going behind a partners back is not swinging it's cheating , We don't meet attached men "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We feel the same. All parties must know what each other is doing. Going behind a partners back is not swinging it's cheating , We don't meet attached men "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't questions people choice not to meet - I question why so many people rant and have a go at blokes who are attached as if this isn't a swinging site? "

because on here is no different to real life, some people rant some don't as in all walks of life

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I agree with your points, I used the term partner\wife swopping as that is the definition. If someone wants to meet only single blokes then surely they would be best to join a dating site - or just not rant about the fact that someone they have spoken to has a partner?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

It's not about wanting a relationship, it's about not wanting the wife/gf on the phone when you're found out for cheating. If you're other half has no issues with you being here then thats a different story, although some may still want the Mrs to confirm this... Being part of a relationship breakup might put a dampener on the NSA fun

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I agree with your points, I used the term partner\wife swopping as that is the definition. If someone wants to meet only single blokes then surely they would be best to join a dating site - or just not rant about the fact that someone they have spoken to has a partner?"

all because you only want to meet single guys that does not mean you want to date

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I want to meet single men, I don't want to date them so why should I be on a dating site and not here?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have a couples profile with my fb and we only search single guys for bi 3 sums. Many couples only want single women or men as well as other couples, nothing wrong with that. As a single, why would you go on a dating site if you were after no strings sex?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think it's a rather outdated and hackneyed definition personally...that limits what can be a very open and liberating lifestyle for those who wish to indulge

I think when people say they're looking for no strings it often means that not only do both parties attach no strings to each other but that they have no existing ones attached to entangle the situation...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Most dating sites are now just sites for people to meet and fuck. When Lisa and I were single we both found that out. Genuine dating sites are few and far between.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So where do couples who want to meet single guys for fun fit into this? Surely your not expecting us to join a dating for a MFM?

We wouldn't knowingly meet single men that are in fact married, but playing without their oh consent, as others have said I can't imagine it would be pleasant to be on the receiving end of a phone call from a unknowing wife/partner!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

you appear to be missing my point - people should stop ranting about non single blokes being on here without the consent of their partner \ wife. I am saying those individuals that rant about this should join a dating website!

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By *orthyorkypairCouple over a year ago

North Yorkshire

"I want to meet single men, I don't want to date them so why should I be on a dating site and not here?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"you appear to be missing my point - people should stop ranting about non single blokes being on here without the consent of their partner \ wife. I am saying those individuals that rant about this should join a dating website!"

People rant about all sorts on here, always have, always will. I'm guessing many that rant about it have been cheated on and hurt in the past maybe.

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By *hortieWoman over a year ago

Northampton

"I don't questions people choice not to meet - I question why so many people rant and have a go at blokes who are attached as if this isn't a swinging site? "

this is a swinging site.. not a dating or a cheating site

personally... if i look at a guys profile and he states he is in a relationship, then i think fair play to him for being honest, its not for me, and i move on. that guy will find others who would accommodate. just not for me... i don't want to KNOWINGLY be a part of cheating.

if a guy (or a girl) were to message me and i checked them out and they stated they were in a relationship but their partner knew and was happy... if we got on well enough, then i would want to verify the partner was happy before proceeding. hell, it might be part of their fantasy play for all i know - i.e. we might get it on and they go back to their partner, tell them about it then bang eachother senseless. who knows.

i just want to have good meets with like minded people, they bring something to me and i bring something to them.. i don't want that something to be hassle or heartbreak.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why should they stop ranting about it?

Why should genuin singles who want NSA join a dating site?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your point appears to have changed during the thread, so it's just the ranting you're not happy about?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

as everyone agrees the site is there for a purpose - however if you chat to someone or get a message etc from someone who has a non consenting partner and your not happy with that - then simply don't reply etc but instead people rant about it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

its the ones who brag about the women they have met who i lose respect for, they critisise their partners but we only hear one side of the story, i think some people are just selfish its all about what they want all the time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"as everyone agrees the site is there for a purpose - however if you chat to someone or get a message etc from someone who has a non consenting partner and your not happy with that - then simply don't reply etc but instead people rant about it?"

Who is ranting about it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Op.. you seem to be sticking hard to your Hypothesis, when the evidence clearly states it is flawed..!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So don't read it and move on, what about people that rant about people that rant

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So why does this bother you so much?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your point, as I saw it, appeared to be...that swinging implied partner swapping so why we're women getting exercised when you told them you had a partner...I believe I have addressed that but bear in mind, purely from my point of view...There are others...I'm happy to be enlightened if I was wrong...It really helps if you reply with quote so it's clear who you're responding to

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some people don't want to meet others that are cheating on partners. Their choice and I don't see what is wrong with that.

The only thing I see wrong in this thread is the suggestion that those people are on the wrong kind of site. I disagree and maybe you are the one that's missing several points

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As far as I see it the term "swinger" or "swingers" refers really to couples who have sex with each other together, partner swapping etc and not men\women getting a shag behind their partners back.

BUT!!! I also get the idea of SINGLES being included who live for the lifestyle \ social aspect of swinging too who have no partner of their own but join in with swinging couples so everyone associated within all relationships are consenting.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

my hypothesis remains - women who have a problem with men being with a partner and then rant about the fact that they are on here should maybe look else where for real single men.

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By *SweetVioletxWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

I like to fuck people I am physically and mentally attracted to. I find deceit unattractive and a huge turn off - no ranting.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

I'm guessing you mean 'truly single' people are more likely to be on a dating site, whereas because 'swinging' is an activity for those in relationships the single people on a site like this are more likely to be attached?

Which I kind of agree with, except that swinging is more of a legacy of this site nowadays.

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By *oxy_minxWoman over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Men who are married or attached can not meet the way I want to, plus I don't like the deceit, it is simple as that!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my hypothesis remains - women who have a problem with men being with a partner and then rant about the fact that they are on here should maybe look else where for real single men."

Many women, including me, that don't wish to take part in playing with another mans wife/partner don't have a problem with it. If the guy is upfront about it then we just move on. There are plenty of single guys on here. Why should we go on a dating site when we don't want to date???!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my hypothesis remains - women who have a problem with men being with a partner and then rant about the fact that they are on here should maybe look else where for real single men."

It remains but it continues to be purely a hypothesis currently...I'll be interested to see how it's proved...I would suggest it's actually an opinion that you are unwilling to have changed no matter how reasonable the counter argument...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!

Which I kind of agree with, except that swinging is more of a legacy of this site nowadays."

indeed, how do you think this site has transitioned forward then?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Should everyone that is single on here, men, women, TV/TS, be on a dating site then?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

willing to have my opinion changed - just don't see why people should complain about the fact that someone has a partner so much! if you choose not to go with someone in that position then fine but don't slate the guy for being on here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"willing to have my opinion changed - just don't see why people should complain about the fact that someone has a partner so much! if you choose not to go with someone in that position then fine but don't slate the guy for being on here. "

Who is being slated? You?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

i think anyone can be on here - just accept that people are on here for different reasons and get over it stop getting annoyed if a bloke has a partner. I would say a high proportion of the single blokes have partners and an even higher percentage of the women wanting to meet women are blokes!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you get critisised for all sorts of things on here so why worry.

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

"I don't questions people choice not to meet - I question why so many people rant and have a go at blokes who are attached as if this isn't a swinging site? "

It is because people on here have morals and respect for their partners. Cheating is not acceptable and cannot be dressed up as swinging. It is still cheating.

It is your choice to do what you think is right and it is other people's choice to decide that what you are doing is not acceptable to them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i think anyone can be on here - just accept that people are on here for different reasons and get over it stop getting annoyed if a bloke has a partner. I would say a high proportion of the single blokes have partners and an even higher percentage of the women wanting to meet women are blokes!!"

I can only see one person on this thread getting annoyed lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Vast majority of people don't rant about it as you put it unless a few individuals start a thread.

The general approach in forums is its your business but we'd rather not be involved...be it to avoid complications, upset or a particular stance.

I believe many people have come here in circumstances similar to yours. Some actually get the answer's to their problem's and get enlightened that whatever the problem in their relationship is, the only way to truly resolve it as a whole package is between the two of you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!

Which I kind of agree with, except that swinging is more of a legacy of this site nowadays.

indeed, how do you think this site has transitioned forward then? "

Maybe:

10% traditional swingers,

20% fuck buddy couples,

50% single men

20% single women

And of those I'd say 80% of the women are looking for love in some form, and 80% of the men are only looking for a wank (or would be too scared to follow through).

It's become part sex site but increasingly cheap/free dating site with some periphery swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my hypothesis remains - women who have a problem with men being with a partner and then rant about the fact that they are on here should maybe look else where for real single men."

why? shouldn't people who rant about people ranting be on another site too ? points of view or something :D

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

not annoyed, far from it! Enjoying the banter and it takes my mind off my work!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Should everyone that is single on here, men, women, TV/TS, be on a dating site then?"

A lot of them probably are too

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

yes probably are a lot of men who are cheating but they keep quiet about it so we dont have to think about it and feel slightly disgusted. they dont talk about their wives and show them just a little bit of respect.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"not annoyed, far from it! Enjoying the banter and it takes my mind off my work!!"

Lol you're attracting some flak...should be working and should be at home...dig in this won't end well !!!

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

[Removed by poster at 22/06/14 10:12:33]

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

To be fair there are plenty women on here who are cheating too. It is easy to bash guys for it but it works both ways.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

can't beat a bit of flak!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not just men.. I'm sure there's plenty of women as well

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not just men.. I'm sure there's plenty of women as well

totaly agree would rather not hear about it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

but are the women that are cheating on here seen in the same light? I sometimes get the feeling that this is not the case. Quite the opposite of a bloke with many partners is a bit of a lad, but a women is called all sorts!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"but are the women that are cheating on here seen in the same light? I sometimes get the feeling that this is not the case. Quite the opposite of a bloke with many partners is a bit of a lad, but a women is called all sorts!"

Thats the way it is and always will be, women are supposed to be ladys.

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

I would say on here if anything it is the other way around. Women cheating has a blind eye turned by the guys who are just after sex with anyone they can get it from. Guys cheating are pilloried becsuse it is dishonest and unfair on their partner.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

my point exactly

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

"my point exactly"

So you admit you are being unfair and dishonest to your partner?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People on here usualy feel sorry for the women, not so much the men though.

They think that their hubbys arent real men or something.

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Haha, there's more cheating married men on the dating sites than here some would say! !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my point exactly"

But that's not your point my friend ? You asked why women get annoyed at you when they find out you have a partner ?

It's no one's business what you choose to do on a daily business and I'm sure you have your mitigations and reasons but the minute you include another surely it's their business too and you have to accept their response ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my point exactly"

Your point appears to change depending on who's agreeing with you...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

there are less women on the site than men, a percentage are cheating on their partners.

since there are more men, there will be more cheaters.

So that is why its it appears that its more acceptable for women to cheat.

for the actual original post:

Just accept u wont get as many meets as truly single people(or those that lie)...and U are forgetting this IS a sex site..but also a swinging site..some people would prefer people who can meet without your particular type of constraint.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my point exactly"

Well it wasn't your original point, make your mind up

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

some will happily play with a cheating partner some wont we all have the choice. It would be nice if those that choose not meet cheating people just inform them directly instead of stating it publicly in forums as some sort of moral issue.

According to most monogomists just by swinging we have little morsl values but we would argue its our perogative to choose to do the things we enjoy. In the same way a chesting person have their right to do so. Dont judgeor condemn them just ignore if against your own moral values

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

I think most people that don't meet married/attached men do just that, they ignore and move on. People who state it in the forums as a moral issue or whatever are usually doing it in response to a thread started by a married man/woman asking why they are struggling on here or similar.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

From what I read in your op. Your not doing any swapping. Your just cheating on your partner (assuming your talking about yourself and not just in general). This to me isn't swinging/swapping as I wouldn't be able to meet your partner it would just be you for my wife!

I think it's the cheating that gets some peoples backs up though.

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

the definition and description of swinging does not need changing, what a ridiculous idea.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

the definition and description of swinging does not need changing, what a ridiculous idea."

well thank you for just dissing an oppinion without being able to state any credible explanation. You just grunt while your eating ss well i guess

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

Op, swinging is about like minded people, you couldnt get much further apart than genuine couples and singles that are living the swinging lifestyle openly, honestly, nothing to hide, not lieing to anyone, not cheating, not hurting anyone, and your cheating man/woman thats full of deceit, lies, strings, hurting others, dragging others into your web of lies, thats a massive flaw into your argument, or 1 of them as you keep changing it.

the thing is although this is a swinging site, cheats will use it, that is accepted, but what you need to accept is that most swingers will not want to meet a cheat, and concentrate on trying to find the ones that arent bothered about your poor wife/partner at home, instead of trying to change the minds those that clearly are here to swing and have nsa fun not cheat.

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By *he. frayMan over a year ago

fareham

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

the definition and description of swinging does not need changing, what a ridiculous idea.

well thank you for just dissing an oppinion without being able to state any credible explanation. You just grunt while your eating ss well i guess

priceless lol some people just like to criticise dont they. Must of got out of bed wrong side this morning lol

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

the definition and description of swinging does not need changing, what a ridiculous idea.

well thank you for just dissing an oppinion without being able to state any credible explanation. You just grunt while your eating ss well i guess

not at all why would I, but the the definition of swinging is correct as it is why would it need changing, because a cheating man is complaining that people wont meet him because he cheats, swinging has never been about cheating on a wife/husband so why should that change now.

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By *ustcutieWoman over a year ago

edinburgh

"Op, swinging is about like minded people, you couldnt get much further apart than genuine couples and singles that are living the swinging lifestyle openly, honestly, nothing to hide, not lieing to anyone, not cheating, not hurting anyone, and your cheating man/woman thats full of deceit, lies, strings, hurting others, dragging others into your web of lies, thats a massive flaw into your argument, or 1 of them as you keep changing it.

This

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

It doesn't state on your profile that your attached so your not only cheating on your partner but also lying to the ladies you may possibly be meeting, I don't think most people on the site would moan about the cheaters if they were honest about it and stated it in there profiles, Honesty seems to be lacking on a lot of profiles not just the men's

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

Some women are ok with it, some aren't.

Those that aren't don't really need to explain why.

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"Perhaps the meaning or terminology of swinging may be somewhat outdated. Historically it was used to define married couples who used to enjoy meeting other couples for sex.

So perhaps fabs needs to alter the site description which encompasses the modern lifestyle of meeting others for sex whether married or single with or without partners consent

the definition and description of swinging does not need changing, what a ridiculous idea.

well thank you for just dissing an oppinion without being able to state any credible explanation. You just grunt while your eating ss well i guess

priceless lol some people just like to criticise dont they. Must of got out of bed wrong side this morning lol"

come on, its a suggestion about changing the meaning of the heading of the site, if it does change to accommodate cheats it will kill the site as a swinging site altogether, its already hard work you only have to read this thread and the attitude of the op to see that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

i am not complaining no one will meet me - i asked the question about people ranting about blokes not being single??

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

i don't want them to justify their choice - just want them not to be slating guys that are not single -

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!

Some women are ok with it, some aren't.

Those that aren't don't really need to explain why."

very eloquently put and surely this applies to every aspect of the site and its member's? Participate if you wish and don't question others preferences if you're not for them ? Has one of these thread's ever ended with everyone agreeing with a satisfactory conclusion?

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

"i don't want them to justify their choice - just want them not to be slating guys that are not single -"

There is a difference between not being single and cheating.

If you are openly swinging and you have a partner then you will not face much opprobrium. If you are being deceitful to your partner, people will inevitably judge you as a dishonest and disrespectful person. Those are not attractive attributes.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i don't want them to justify their choice - just want them not to be slating guys that are not single -"

You're asking the impossible and not just with your particular subject. People will never see eye to eye with you on everything and the sooner you accept that the better.

People will disagree with many of my perspectives and all I can do is offer a plausible debate on the subject as opposed to demanding they change their stance.

I would suggest you try the same but it's not an easy one to debate from a position of strength.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A married man will be hard to pin down for a time to meet. Will probably just want a quick fuck before he runs back to his wife or a fumble in his car at lunchtime. He won't be able to accommodate and will be reluctant to get a hotel room because his wife will notice the money gone from the bank. You won't be able to have a drink before you get down to sex in case someone he knows sees him. Too much hassle for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A married man will be hard to pin down for a time to meet. Will probably just want a quick fuck before he runs back to his wife or a fumble in his car at lunchtime. He won't be able to accommodate and will be reluctant to get a hotel room because his wife will notice the money gone from the bank. You won't be able to have a drink before you get down to sex in case someone he knows sees him. Too much hassle for me "

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By *isexmistressWoman over a year ago

Prestwich

Are you married and meeting without your partner?

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

"I like to fuck people I am physically and mentally attracted to. I find deceit unattractive and a huge turn off - no ranting."

Ruby x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's also the issue with the partner finding out and going on the war path.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

understand that aspect x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Openness, honesty and trust are to us the most important things when it comes to swinging, infact we believe it is the core of it. We have met men who are cheating but only found out after and it took the whole shine off of it for us. Being an attached single will mean that you will be vilified and some will see it as you want some of their partner but your not willing to share yours.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!

Some women are ok with it, some aren't.

Those that aren't don't really need to explain why."

But according to the op we should be on a dating site instead

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"i don't want them to justify their choice - just want them not to be slating guys that are not single -"

I see.

Can you answer me this totally honestly. How would you feel if you that your had a profile here? I think reflecting on that might give you an insight into why some women are likely to express their distaste, some men too.

For me I don't give a damn, people hurt and deceive each other daily, just as long as I'm not involved in it and the people doing it don't try to justify their actions while asking me not to comment unfavourably.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

That should say if you found that your wife had a profile on here.

I actually hate this phone

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

Cheating and swinging are not the same the thing, people have the right to judge between the 2 and voice an opinion between the 2, and they will do, like I said you will find people on here aswell as away from here that wont have any problems meeting a cheat, but thinking you can change swingers views and opinons on cheats is like trying to knock a stonewall down with your head, its not going to happen, people who swing and people who dont view cheating the same, just take it on the chin and seek those that will meet cheats, but be prepared for the consequences when you are inevitably caught, and its only fair if you are honest about your situation with anyone you may meet as its very unfair to unwillingly drag others into your web of lies.

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

You seem to be unable to grasp the concept. If your partner does not know and consent to you having sex with others then you are cheating not swinging. Swinging is with everyone s consent. This is a swinging site. I am a single lady as in the concept I have no partner at all. Some could say I cannot swap as have no partner to swap consensually.

You are cheating not swinging. Does that make that clearer?

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Forgot to add that can you now understand how people get annoyed with you? If they expect it to all be consensually and you are hiding a partner they will get annoyed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I did mistakenly read the OP's profile..I read "cannot accom as the mess is at home" lololol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

thanks for the clarity _ruit, however if you read others points of view on swinging your not entitled to be on here either as you have no-one to swop? its about consenting couples so maybe this site should be restricted to couples?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I did mistakenly read the OP's profile..I read "cannot accom as the mess is at home" lololol"

lol I always thought the mess was the kitchen/eating area. Funny place to live!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh great another one of these threads

I've repeatedly argued that swinging can be quite a noble and spiritual pursuit. It involves a strong relationship, good communication, loyalty in order to keep to the couple's self imposed rules, and a willingness to see other people as beautiful sexy souls rather than lumps of meat. It is to sex what back packing round the world is to tourism. You can go on holiday for a weekend to sunny Spain with pretty much anyone...but you need a really amazing friend if you're gonna spend months backpacking around in dangerous foreign waters. Some have argued that I have a mental problem suggesting this stuff on a swinging NSA site. But for us swinging is the EXACT OPPOSITE of cheating.

Swinging is a group project entered into equally, carefully, and lovingly by both sides of a couple. It may or may not involve any penetrative sex at all...it could just be some heavy petting or foreplay. But it is absolutely 100% consensual.

This site is here for swingers, singles who just want some NSA fun, singles who want to find the love of their life, partners who want to cheat, animals who want to marry lamp posts. It's open to everyone. It's a website. But just because you managed to get membership to a swinging website doesn't mean what you're doing is swinging. And in the case of the OP it certainly shouldn't lend any air of respectability to what is essentially a dirty deed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

may I suggest reading glasses

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thanks for the clarity _ruit, however if you read others points of view on swinging your not entitled to be on here either as you have no-one to swop? its about consenting couples so maybe this site should be restricted to couples?"

Sod it, that's where I've been going wrong, I have nothing to swap, well, got some football cards if anyone's interested??! Is this fabswappers now then? lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

its not about who's on here regarding their status as single or cpl...dunno why u are trying to justify something that shouldnt be justified.

Some people dont even want to meet others..they still have a right to be users of the site.

Sorry matey, but this is more looking like a whycantIgetmeets post than anything else..and your lack of understanding WHY u arent getting as many meets as u like.

You have a right to be on the site regardless of anything...the potential consequences of ur being on the site are what others dont want.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

very funny indeed, however it would seem your naive knowledge of the terms is causing you confusion. Much like mine with the various opinions on swinging definitions

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That should say if you found that your wife had a profile on here.

I actually hate this phone

Does your phone know you're on here ? Maybe it's not easy with all this debauchery

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"very funny indeed, however it would seem your naive knowledge of the terms is causing you confusion. Much like mine with the various opinions on swinging definitions "

use the quote button..nobody knows who u are replying to ffs lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"very funny indeed, however it would seem your naive knowledge of the terms is causing you confusion. Much like mine with the various opinions on swinging definitions "
Just a quick tip . If you reply by using the reply n quote . We would see who you was actually replying too . Justsaying .com

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"very funny indeed, however it would seem your naive knowledge of the terms is causing you confusion. Much like mine with the various opinions on swinging definitions "

Not really, I'm here as a single and a couple as someone else has said, because we can, its open to all sorts otherwise only couples would be allowed to join. Swinging means all different things to different people and as long as you adhere to the site rules then there's not issue.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

thanks for your overview - I really am not bothered about meets, I am on here for my reasons. I really am amused by the way people respond to questions, and how quick things turn personal!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I give up

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thanks for your overview - I really am not bothered about meets, I am on here for my reasons. I really am amused by the way people respond to questions, and how quick things turn personal!"

Everyone is on here for their own reasons, reasons that have nothing to do with me, they don't affect me and neither do I worry or judge why people are on here. I meet people who are suitable for me and me for them and have fun along the way, the whole point of this site as far as I'm concerned

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By *et a roomCouple over a year ago

Leeds

"Oh great another one of these threads

Hear hear!

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Its strange as I have been in this lifestyle for about 7 years now and met many many people. I seem to have grasped the site perfectly well.

On the other hand your original post was you asking people why they were getting cross at you!!

I think it is you who is confused rather than me!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

i never mentioned individuals getting cross at me - observational comment that was all.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You have to ask why some women are getting pissed that someone is on here without their partners knowledge. Is it because, as I've had, its not clear on a profile they are in that situation so you spend time chatting only to be told nearer the time of meeting? If its clear then I won't reply or just say I'm not interested in married men and none of my time is wasted. Many get pissed about it in the forum when a thread about married/attached people is started. If people were upfront, then I don't think others would get pissed as their time being wouldn't be wasted.

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

"i never mentioned individuals getting cross at me - observational comment that was all."

If you think I am getting cross you are again wrong. I am amazed that you still don't grasp it. You think everyone else is wrong when people are actually recognising you are the one lacking in knowledge of this lifestyle.

Believe me if I was cross my post would read very different.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't think anyone's actually stated that on this thread have they?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i never mentioned individuals getting cross at me - observational comment that was all.

Believe me if I was cross my post would read very ydifferent."

I like you when you're aroused...lol

j x

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By *rinking-in-laCouple over a year ago

Bristol

Don't you get it? This site is not restricted for anyone. Everyone is free to post as they wish and people are free to choose based upon whichever criteria they see fit.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Sod it, that's where I've been going wrong, I have nothing to swap, well, got some football cards if anyone's interested??! Is this fabswappers now then? lol"

ooo yes please! Have you got Peter Bonetti?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"my hypothesis remains - women who have a problem with men being with a partner and then rant about the fact that they are on here should maybe look else where for real single men."

no need to look elsewhere there are plenty of real single men on here to find so put your "no one wants me" dummy back in and move on

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By *ouplekinkCouple over a year ago

kink town

Can tell your an Officer as you're not very smart are you!

No one on this thread is confused what swinging is and the only person having a rant is you, about people people ranting!!

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

"i never mentioned individuals getting cross at me - observational comment that was all.

Believe me if I was cross my post would read very ydifferent.

I like you when you're aroused...lol

oooo you say the horniest things xxxxx

j x"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Believe me if I was cross my post would read very different.

I like you when you're aroused...lol

oooo you say the horniest things xxxxx

j x"

you've been a very naughty girl...go to my room...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Without reading all the replys for us, swinging is a honest past time. We don't cheat, we don't need to we choose people to fuck together. Is the dishonest factor of man or woman going behind their partners backs that I disagree with.

Swinging is great because it's anti cheating. We would never meet a man or woman going beind partners back

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

[Removed by poster at 22/06/14 13:58:38]

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"You have to ask why some women are getting pissed that someone is on here without their partners knowledge. Is it because, as I've had, its not clear on a profile they are in that situation so you spend time chatting only to be told nearer the time of meeting? If its clear then I won't reply or just say I'm not interested in married men and none of my time is wasted. Many get pissed about it in the forum when a thread about married/attached people is started. If people were upfront, then I don't think others would get pissed as their time being wouldn't be wasted."

Yes that's the poiunt I am sure. The OP ask why they are ranting at him. It's probably not because you are attached but because your profile misled them! !!

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

I think the that the term swinger(s) has evolved from the days of it being purely a partner swapping thing. It now definitely does include single people, I'm one and I've met many others. I don't judge people on their personal morals so a potential sexual partner being married or in a relationship is not really my concern.

However if other people, singles or couples choose not to meet people who are in a relationship that's their personal choice. If a person pretends to be single to get in with them they have a perfect right to be pissed off at them. For one thing as said by others they'll have been wasting the deceived parties times and for another most people simply don't like being lied to.

Having been married and someone who 'cheated' for a year I know it's not something I'd do again. It was too painful an experience both for my children, then wife and myself. Now I'm open and honest when it comes to my relationships, if someone asks me "are you swinger?2 I'll say yes

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By *ruitWoman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Believe me if I was cross my post would read very different.

I like you when you're aroused...lol

oooo you say the horniest things xxxxx

j x

you've been a very naughty girl...go to my room...

mmmmm xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thanks for your overview - I really am not bothered about meets, I am on here for my reasons. I really am amused by the way people respond to questions, and how quick things turn personal!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thanks for your overview - I really am not bothered about meets, I am on here for my reasons. "

That's not what your profile says though.... It says you are looking for horny meets with women

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"thanks for your overview - I really am not bothered about meets, I am on here for my reasons.

That's not what your profile says though.... It says you are looking for horny meets with women

Yea but that's just a cover, I bet he works for Sydney Uni

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *SweetVioletxWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

Someone wake me up when OP has decided on one opinion. I'm off to dating site to look for married men as I have no right to be here as a genuine single female. HA!

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By *eddonistikMan over a year ago

Manchester

"Someone wake me up when OP has decided on one opinion. I'm off to dating site to look for married men as I have no right to be here as a genuine single female. HA!"

I'm easy going, you can shag me if you want, bunch of other blokes too, let me know?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

the risk of said partner not taking lightly to being cheated on and fucking up their lives?

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

There is a propensity for some men to believe that women who choose to have multiple sexual partners will literally have sex with any body who expresses the slightest interest. They imagine these women to have no discretion at all and often express dismay and surprise when their profile detailing exactly what they want goes unnoticed. There is a subset of these men who are married who can't understand why women who will have sex with anyone who asks won't have sex with them because after all it is all about partner swapping or we are all here for the same thing. Everyone has a moral code of some sort but these people often equate morals with sexual activity where women are concerned and are stunned to discover that it is possible to be highly moral and highly sexually active. Who knew?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Someone wake me up when OP has decided on one opinion. I'm off to dating site to look for married men as I have no right to be here as a genuine single female. HA!"

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There is a propensity for some men to believe that women who choose to have multiple sexual partners will literally have sex with any body who expresses the slightest interest. They imagine these women to have no discretion at all and often express dismay and surprise when their profile detailing exactly what they want goes unnoticed. There is a subset of these men who are married who can't understand why women who will have sex with anyone who asks won't have sex with them because after all it is all about partner swapping or we are all here for the same thing. Everyone has a moral code of some sort but these people often equate morals with sexual activity where women are concerned and are stunned to discover that it is possible to be highly moral and highly sexually active. Who knew?"

It always amuses me when some ugly old duffer gets upset that they aren't getting anywhere with the young beauties on here. I know it might sound a bit cruel but...if they couldn't pull it in real life what makes them think they've got any chance on here

What I really mean is very much what you said...there's this feeling of entitlement...as if we we're all slappers or sex objects which should, in the name of liberty, be freely available to them lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What I really mean is very much what you said...there's this feeling of entitlement...as if we we're all slappers or sex objects which should, in the name of liberty, be freely available to them lol "

It works the other way too. Some men who deem themselves hot get rather upset when a fat, old woman says no thanks

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stand by for abuse coming my way!!"

In general people don't get pissed of with attached men on here in our experience...Well not if they're honest about it. So obviously the problem lies with your deceit because nowhere on your profile do you state that you have a partner. All you say is that you can't accom because you live in the officers mess.....I thought officers had quarters and that the mess was the officers equivalent of the NAAFI.

Also why would the single women/men on here go to a dating site when they're looking to lead this lifestyle? If you're looking to live this lifestyle where better to find a likeminded partner?

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