FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Are winkers really that bad?
Are winkers really that bad?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I love winks 
I can ignore them without feeling guilty or if I like the people that have sent them ill send one back
Makes life much easier for me in here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??"
Some people just prefere an email to a wink,i think maybe they think they are a lazy way to get attention x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I don't understand why people get so stressed about them,they're easy to ignore but then people get upset and stressed about all sorts of things on here
Some just think they're a lazy way of communicating and they don't like them,I suposse they feel that if you can't be bothered to write a message then you will be a crap meet
NOT what I have found |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??"
If people are like that why are there on this site? |
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??
Some people just prefere an email to a wink,i think maybe they think they are a lazy way to get attention x"
Fair point but is it rude to wink? Do people view it as annoying?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??
Some people just prefere an email to a wink,i think maybe they think they are a lazy way to get attention xFair point but is it rude to wink? Do people view it as annoying?"
How can they be annoying.. Its takes one click to delete them x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
Its quite easy really,the people that hate them will have it plastered all over their profiles anyway
So don't annoy them by winking...........unless you're in one of those moods where you just can't help yourself and you send one for the sheer naughtiness of it,purely to imagine their reaction to the cheek of it all |
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??
Some people just prefere an email to a wink,i think maybe they think they are a lazy way to get attention xFair point but is it rude to wink? Do people view it as annoying?
How can they be annoying.. Its takes one click to deletethem x"
I totally agree and often feel it pointless to send a long winded to many who will ignore them anyway
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well personally I find them a bit annoying. I mean it takes all of 2 minutes to write a short message and introduce yourself. I've gotten winks, I've messaged them back then, and got zero reply, so why even bother sending me a wink then?
I dont know people are just weird. I think they can be useful if your trying to get someones attention. For example, if someone hasnt checked there messages in a while, sending them a wink, might mean they would look at your profile.
But personally I prefer it when someone just sends me a message. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?"
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy"
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day  |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day "
I'm in the "well if you want to get to know me then bloody hell talk to me" camp... sorry, just am, i want to try and get a feel for someone....
a wink tells me nothing other than you managed to hit a button... congrats!!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day
I'm in the "well if you want to get to know me then bloody hell talk to me" camp... sorry, just am, i want to try and get a feel for someone....
a wink tells me nothing other than you managed to hit a button... congrats!!! "
the wink option is offered by the site, we can chose to use it or not. way I see it I may wink at someone I like in a bar or elsewhere but I don't write to them that make sense ? |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day
I'm in the "well if you want to get to know me then bloody hell talk to me" camp... sorry, just am, i want to try and get a feel for someone....
a wink tells me nothing other than you managed to hit a button... congrats!!!
the wink option is offered by the site, we can chose to use it or not. way I see it I may wink at someone I like in a bar or elsewhere but I don't write to them that make sense ? "
absolutely..... the wink option is offered and a lot of people decide not to use it.... the OP asked why? I am giving him the other side of the coin so to speak |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day
I'm in the "well if you want to get to know me then bloody hell talk to me" camp... sorry, just am, i want to try and get a feel for someone....
a wink tells me nothing other than you managed to hit a button... congrats!!!
the wink option is offered by the site, we can chose to use it or not. way I see it I may wink at someone I like in a bar or elsewhere but I don't write to them that make sense ?
absolutely..... the wink option is offered and a lot of people decide not to use it.... the OP asked why? I am giving him the other side of the coin so to speak"
sorry Fabio, hit me blooming fingers were quuicker than me brain, not disagreeing  nad I hope I put the blushing smiley |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
a wink makes no effort at all.....and takes no effort... i just think its sloppy and lazy
It is just a quick and easy way to show someone your interested, I have had a few meet of here that started with a wink, allthough iam sure they can be annoying if your getting 100s a day
I'm in the "well if you want to get to know me then bloody hell talk to me" camp... sorry, just am, i want to try and get a feel for someone....
a wink tells me nothing other than you managed to hit a button... congrats!!! "
Fair point, i guess they dont suit everyone but if i get winked at iam quite flattered |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We dont mind getting winks at all - we are often flattered by them! If we then look at the profile and like it - we reply.
We do ignore winks from people who obviously havent read our profile before sending a wink though. BUT what we really do not like is the people who say - on profile - that they dont like winks, so we write a message to them and they totally ignore it! A polite NO is all it requires.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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bet i wasnt the only one to mis-read that.
i like winks....gives me an option as to whether i thank the peson or not with no obligation...unlike a pm
and who doesnt find it flattering?? |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"bet i wasnt the only one to mis-read that.
i like winks....gives me an option as to whether i thank the peson or not with no obligation...unlike a pm
and who doesnt find it flattering??"
if i say me... does that get me chucked out of the hareem....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
"bet i wasnt the only one to mis-read that.
i like winks....gives me an option as to whether i thank the peson or not with no obligation...unlike a pm
and who doesnt find it flattering??
if i say me... does that get me chucked out of the hareem.... "
sooooo tempted but do I really want to face the wrath of Fabio?
No I think ill sit on my hands instead |
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"bet i wasnt the only one to mis-read that.
i like winks....gives me an option as to whether i thank the peson or not with no obligation...unlike a pm
and who doesnt find it flattering??
if i say me... does that get me chucked out of the hareem.... "
nah fab you here for the long haul. I don't think that your opinion is wrong just feel thasome should not dismiss potentiality good meets for something so trivial |
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Honestly find them one of the best ways to introduce yourself on here.
Imagine you are in a club and someone comes over chatting away and you honestly dont like them, how do you politly ignore them ??.. Yes, you could say, sorry, not interested and offend them straight from the off.
However, imagine you are in a club and the guy/couple/girl looks over and gives a sexy smile/wink...
You can either respond with the same or simply look away pretending not to have noticed.. no offence caused and no night spoilt.
So yes, call them winks or smiles but they are usefull, to both the sender and the reciever.. Also saves 20 mins writing a perfect reply to an add just to see it deleted and no reply... |
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YOU CANT BEAT A GOOD WINK ! I WINK NOW N AGAIN IF I WANNA DRAW ATTENTION TO MYSELF TO SOMEONE SO THEY CAN THEN EITHER LOOK AT PROFILE N SAY SOD OFF LOL OR WINK BACK OR SEND A MESSAGE IF THEY LIKE WOT THEY SEE !!
IVE SENT MESAGES CHAPETER N VERSE N NOT EVEN HAD A NO THANK YOU BUT THEN AGAIN HAD A QUICK WINK AND RECIEVED NICE COMMENTS N INVITES BACK
SO I SAY WINK AWAY YOU WONT GO BLIND XXXXX
PS IF YOU FANCY A PEEK AT PROFILE FEEL FREE N IF YOU LIKE THEN WHY NOT WINK ME !! NICK XX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Winks arent that bad in our opinion like someone posted earlier you can always wink back if your interested or even better reply to that wink if they take your fancy!!
More annoying to us is the ones who send a friends request without sending a message or at least a wink but i guess thats a topic thats also been covered a thousand times!!
Little rant over, back to perving!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i send winks now and then. i dont see what the problem is with them. it would make the whole process easier if everyone used them. i send a wink, and if the person winks back, i send a message to them. its very tedious sending message after message to people and not getting replies. its easier to know they are interested before you pour your heart and soul into a message. |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"I've gotten winks, I've messaged them back then, and got zero reply, so why even bother sending me a wink then?"
This happens and it's bizarre, as are people who send banal messages and expect me to be all over them like a lost puppy - "hi, what's up" will get the answer "sky" however perfect your tits are..
Anyway, I try to write messages that are specific to the profile I'm writing to, but as others say, when you see it deleted it...deflects off your thick skin! (not sure I pour my "heart & soul" into it, though scouserlaa!)
So maybe winks are a way to go. That way I can more rejection into my day for less effort! woooooooo |
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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago
south staffs |
If the winker has hardly any info on his/her profile and no pictures then a wink to us is an irritation. We explain on our profile that we would prefer a message, and if the person manages to read that far, it is because we would like to see someone's face.
Winking is not wrong or deplorable, it is just a longer way around finding what we are looking for.
Jane x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?"
i just find winks lazy thats all, if i look thro profiles and find a guy im attracted to i send him a message telling him a little about me and what im looking for, to me winks just give the impression of people going thro profiles and winking everyone in a hope that someone will reply rather than contacting me because they like me as an individual, winks are just like a lucky dip, wink enough people and someone will reply lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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U see -
I LIKE A WINKER,,,,,,I LIKE A WANKER,,,,BUT WHICH IS BETTER?
ONLY 1WAY TO FIND OUT---fight!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But so many seem to even state in profiles how uncomfortable they are with them. I wonder if they fear missing out on getting to know the less pushy and upfront people??
Some people just prefere an email to a wink,i think maybe they think they are a lazy way to get attention x"
Yep...I definitely think it's s very lazy way to get attention, especially on a site like this where you can send messages freely!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"bet i wasnt the only one to mis-read that.
i like winks....gives me an option as to whether i thank the peson or not with no obligation...unlike a pm
and who doesnt find it flattering??
if i say me... does that get me chucked out of the hareem.... "
I've agreed 100% with everything you've said Fabio, and I don't find them flattering either!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
"lets have the wink button removed and the problem goes away lol "
NO I don't want to read loads of drivel in a cut n paste message thanks
Nor do I want to feel guilty if someone has taken loads of trouble to write and I feel I have to respond even though I don't fancy them
I would rather recieve a wink from a well written profile
winks are'nt a problem for anyone no-one even has to look at them if they don't like them
Keep em here |
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
i just find winks lazy thats all, if i look thro profiles and find a guy im attracted to i send him a message telling him a little about me and what im looking for, to me winks just give the impression of people going thro profiles and winking everyone in a hope that someone will reply rather than contacting me because they like me as an individual, winks are just like a lucky dip, wink enough people and someone will reply lol"
"Wink enough people and someone will reply" ahhhh thats where i've been going wrong!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?"
In a nutshell it says you are too busy winking at everyone rather than mailing a few. Unless your exceptional a wink just gets ignored by us.  |
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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago
north manchester |
We don't mind winks, although we don't send many. They're easy to ignore without causing potential offence if you don't like the profile. We sometimes wink at people who've read our profile but not messaged us... one of those lead eventually to a lovely meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We like winks too! We don't take it as lazy or appalling that someone couldn't write a beautifully-worded message...!
We have it in our profile too, so we're positively encouraging winks
If we like the look, we get in touch & say thanks - if not, we feel okay with just ignoring it.
xx |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
God there are some intolerant people about! How can a wink cause some of the stated reactions? Good to read the post though, it does let people know a bit more about others on the site.
Quite frankly, we would much rather meet people who are easy going about life, than meet those who get agitated by a simple thing as a wink.
We love winks for all the stated reasons and look forward to getting them, even from single guys! Although we state that we no longer meet single guys, we have made some great single friends through winks. And who knows.... |
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"God there are some intolerant people about! How can a wink cause some of the stated reactions? Good to read the post though, it does let people know a bit more about others on the site.
Quite frankly, we would much rather meet people who are easy going about life, than meet those who get agitated by a simple thing as a wink.
We love winks for all the stated reasons and look forward to getting them, even from single guys! Although we state that we no longer meet single guys, we have made some great single friends through winks. And who knows...."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We like winks too! We don't take it as lazy or appalling that someone couldn't write a beautifully-worded message...!
We have it in our profile too, so we're positively encouraging winks
If we like the look, we get in touch & say thanks - if not, we feel okay with just ignoring it.
xx "
Exactly!!!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've discovered a problem with winks - I don't know who I've winked!
Where's the list of people I've sent winks to? I don't want to serially wink at the same gorgeous specimen 9 times..."
Does it not tell you on their profile if you've winked at them? you being a site supporter an all that |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
Funny.... Since we posted on here that we like winks, even from single guys.... Guess what?
Loads of winks from single guys! This is not a complaint, more a collective thank you from a lady who needed cheering up! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wink at people because it's the internets way of gaining 'eye contact'.. and guess what.. we ARE on the internet. As others have already said.. the time you can waste sending a well crafted message just to be ignored is absolutely pointless.
I don't object to a wink being ignored but let's face it .. those that object to receiving them generally have so many 'conditions' & 'preferences' I wonder why they are even on a site like this in the first place.. maybe they just like something to whine about or critisise to achieve an imagined superior status? who knows?.. all a wink says is .'I'm interested and like your profile'. how offensive is that?
Pointless and easily rejected arguments welcomed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love winks, and don't understand anyone that takes offense. It's one of the features of the site, so I use it not very often, but maybe I'm just lost for words at that moment as a way to get the ball rolling. It's just an ice breaker. Some people are way too touchy. |
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"God there are some intolerant people about! How can a wink cause some of the stated reactions? Good to read the post though, it does let people know a bit more about others on the site.
Quite frankly, we would much rather meet people who are easy going about life, than meet those who get agitated by a simple thing as a wink.
We love winks for all the stated reasons and look forward to getting them, even from single guys! Although we state that we no longer meet single guys, we have made some great single friends through winks. And who knows...."
A bit different from being accused of taking the piss out of folks by sending them a wink just to say I'd seen them looking at me ! lol |
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"Funny.... Since we posted on here that we like winks, even from single guys.... Guess what?
Loads of winks from single guys! This is not a complaint, more a collective thank you from a lady who needed cheering up! "
I hope they were'nt all taking the piss |
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"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?"
Hi biklad, sorry didnt see you'd already got this thread open, have you seen my threads about winking and hidden profiles in which _umour from Northampton accused me of taking the piss out of profile watchers.
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"Hi guys I just wondered why those that choose winking as a form of introduction detested by so many?
Hi biklad, sorry didnt see you'd already got this thread open, have you seen my threads about winking and hidden profiles in which _umour from Northampton accused me of taking the piss out of profile watchers.
"
Can't say I have. To be fair everybody has posted brilliant and encouraging posts on the topic. Sorry you have been given a had time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We use them ,we think its a nice and not too obtrusive way of saying..hi, were interested and see if they reply.. we also rpely to all our winks we receive. |
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We wink and we like to get winks.. it's not so much that we can't be bothered to write something to you, but a way to break the ice without maybe having to bother you too much if you don't like us? Works both ways.. |
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Just read this on someone's profile.. "what are we supposed to do when someone sends us a wink?wink back?i dont think so.for those that send winks,stop it.you are wasting your time and ours,send a message,say something,winking is for wankers."
Get the feeling they don't like winks??
Also read on another couple's profile (that we really likes the sound of) that they didn't mind winks at all, but unless you sent a message first they would be ignored and to stop wasting their time.
Missing the point maybe? |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
"
Hi biklad, sorry didnt see you'd already got this thread open, have you seen my threads about winking and hidden profiles in which _umour from Northampton accused me of taking the piss out of profile watchers. "
For goodness sake, if you are going to call me out in a different post, please make sure people know what you said to get my reaction!
"Dogmeisters
why would you want to wink someone because they looked at you're profile? if they were interested they would have contacted you, people look at profiles for all sorts of reasons, including having a nosey after reading your forum posts.
Hornyeyes4u
Its just my way of being cheeky to them for looking, anyways why shud they have the best of both worlds just when they feel like it and not us singles. Not only are single blokes ripped off when going to swingers clubs with exorbitant prices but restricted viewing too lol.
Rumour
So, you are moaning cos you can't take the piss????? Nice fella!
(another off the Christmas card list!) "
As I stated before, we don't mind winks from anyone. It is telling us that they like what they have seen so far and an invite, if we feel the same, to get in touch. To wink at someone just because they looked at your profile and just to be cheeky because YOU are pissed off that couples have it all their own way, is puerile at best!
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
"Can't say I have. To be fair everybody has posted brilliant and encouraging posts on the topic. Sorry you have been given a had time."
Hi blk, yeah we thought this post was going well too. have had loads of winks since we first posted as above.lol We really can't understand some peoples attitude as posted by Little-Miss-Muffet from an unknown profile.
Just interested to know from the single guys out there. What do they think of winks and/or do they get many? We have winked at single guys and have had some lovely emails, even when we tell them that the wink is because we would just like to be friends. Lucky for us, we have a few singles that we can count as friends, even though we will never play!
Pete & Les |
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"Can't say I have. To be fair everybody has posted brilliant and encouraging posts on the topic. Sorry you have been given a had time.
Hi blk, yeah we thought this post was going well too. have had loads of winks since we first posted as above.lol We really can't understand some peoples attitude as posted by Little-Miss-Muffet from an unknown profile.
Just interested to know from the single guys out there. What do they think of winks and/or do they get many? We have winked at single guys and have had some lovely emails, even when we tell them that the wink is because we would just like to be friends. Lucky for us, we have a few singles that we can count as friends, even though we will never play!
Pete & Les"
If you read it as it was posted that was the reply that Biklad sent to me when I appologised for posting another wink question when his was already open and running ! I can also say that mine was brilliant with loads in favour and only a minscule amount not in favour of winks so just as speaker of the house would say, theyeys have the eyes have it lmao. |
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By *udereMan
over a year ago
haringey |
while i can understand why some people ignore winks i personaly think they are a fun harmless way of breaking the ice if you like the person wink bak if you dont ignore and no harm done to either party |
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I'm a winker, I'm a winker, and it does me good, like it bloody well should!
Would you just completely ignore someone who winked at you in a club! No you'd at least glance back and check them out. Should be the same here! |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"I'm a winker, I'm a winker, and it does me good, like it bloody well should!
Would you just completely ignore someone who winked at you in a club! No you'd at least glance back and check them out. Should be the same here! "
i would think they had something in their eye |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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sureky if you dont like to be winked out, you dont even need to click on the link to wink!
you dont even have to know if you've been abused....it's pain free, and the abuser doesnt need to know he's been ignored/deleted.
and i've not seen a thread yet which moans about us inconsiderate women not replying to a wink...unlike pm's which are up in the double figures (at least) |
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By *onny Bones OP Man
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
"Can't say I have. To be fair everybody has posted brilliant and encouraging posts on the topic. Sorry you have been given a had time.
Hi blk, yeah we thought this post was going well too. have had loads of winks since we first posted as above.lol We really can't understand some peoples attitude as posted by Little-Miss-Muffet from an unknown profile.
Just interested to know from the single guys out there. What do they think of winks and/or do they get many? We have winked at single guys and have had some lovely emails, even when we tell them that the wink is because we would just like to be friends. Lucky for us, we have a few singles that we can count as friends, even though we will never play!
Pete & Les"
Hi Rumour, I think it very encouraging that you are proof that being open minded and accepting the wink as an ice breaker actually works
I can't speak for all guys on here but I have had very few winks since being on the site. Some single men may get them on aregular basis, but a rarity for me!  |
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