FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Preconceptions and concerns regarding meeting us younger folk!
Preconceptions and concerns regarding meeting us younger folk!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hey all,
This post is more of an open question (and for discussion?)... But what are all of your concerns/worries/preconceptions/stereotypes you have regarding meeting younger people. Younger guys, girls or just newbies to the scene's
scene!
Although I suppose this is focusing on.the negatives, it's also nice to hear examples of works well/gains a thumbs-up from you too!
Many thanks 
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Well, for me, I only meet people whose ages fit in with mine mathematically. 43 minus 20 is 23, so I'm more than twice your age or...twice your age, remainder 3 which doesn't fit well in my head. Also, you're an even age and I'm odd, so that wouldn't work either. Also, your total age number is 2 and mine is 7. Totally numberelli incompatible.
So to summarise.....it's your age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i can only speak for myself regarding my lower age limit, but here goes:
my eldest child is 19, and shagging someone that is too close to that age really kinda creeps me out. also, no offense intended as again is just my _iew, but i need a man experienced enough to have the confidence to be assertive in bed and also know how to read a woman's reactions. i prefer not to tell a man how to give me pleasure. i will communicate, just prefer not to direct the action. |
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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago
Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria |
"Well, for me, I only meet people whose ages fit in with mine mathematically. 43 minus 20 is 23, so I'm more than twice your age or...twice your age, remainder 3 which doesn't fit well in my head. Also, you're an even age and I'm odd, so that wouldn't work either. Also, your total age number is 2 and mine is 7. Totally numberelli incompatible.
So to summarise.....it's your age. "
Fucking hell Steve, never realised that was how you worked out who to meet....how does my age compare with yours then? 
OP...the youngest guy I've met (so far) was 21 years younger than me and it was great fun; I arranged for him to accompany me to a social last year after we'd messaged quite a lot on here and by text - our mail/text convos flowed easily which suggested to me that we'd get on well in person.
My concern when meeting a much younger person on a 1-1 would be that we wouldn't have enough common ground to enable a decent conversation (I need a bit of a cerebral connection to make the most of sex in those circumstances). In a club setting, I wouldn't bother too much as often in public rooms I've no fecking idea who's doing what to me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll take a few younger women if there are any going spare?
You make them sound like biscuits.
Who doesn't like biscuits?
Crisp, nut and other assorted snack manufacturers. "
I can't dunk any of them! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im only 29 so imo im still a young un myself but i originally had my age preferences to meet as young as 18 but soon changed it as in each of my experiences they were crap at foreplay n all had extremely bad habits most likely frim too much porn! but maybe thats just me n ive been unlucky |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As long as you aren't genetically linked to me, I'll meet.
I worry youngers get over excited and can't get it up. It's happened several times. But by 23-24 that seems to diminish. I used to worry I was too big, too unattractive, but whatever I think about myself, it doesn't put young men off one bit. |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
Until recently I'd only ever had sex with people older than me. A few years younger doesn't really phase me now. However, someone that could chronologically refer to me as a MILF would be just too weird, regardless of how much of a nice time we could actually have. Mind you, my ex-stepdad was only 5 years older than me so my mum might have a different take on things - I shall make a point of asking her! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I totally get the worries! People our age are very well, thought-driven and even that seems to blow the lid for most, haha.
Of course, some young-uns prove the rule and some are the exception!
At least a more acceptable age isn't too far away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll take a few younger women if there are any going spare?
You make them sound like biscuits.
Who doesn't like biscuits?
Crisp, nut and other assorted snack manufacturers.
I can't dunk any of them! "
You dunk women? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll take a few younger women if there are any going spare?
You make them sound like biscuits.
Who doesn't like biscuits?
Crisp, nut and other assorted snack manufacturers.
I can't dunk any of them!
You dunk women?"
Tbag? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey all,
This post is more of an open question (and for discussion?)... But what are all of your concerns/worries/preconceptions/stereotypes you have regarding meeting younger people. Younger guys, girls or just newbies to the scene's
scene!
Although I suppose this is focusing on.the negatives, it's also nice to hear examples of works well/gains a thumbs-up from you too!
Many thanks
"
Do you have any concerns/worries/preconceptions about meeting older people?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll take a few younger women if there are any going spare?
You make them sound like biscuits.
Who doesn't like biscuits?
Crisp, nut and other assorted snack manufacturers.
I can't dunk any of them!
You dunk women?
Tbag? "
Im d*unk, don't confuse me with your sexy euphemisms. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey all,
This post is more of an open question (and for discussion?)... But what are all of your concerns/worries/preconceptions/stereotypes you have regarding meeting younger people. Younger guys, girls or just newbies to the scene's
scene!
Although I suppose this is focusing on.the negatives, it's also nice to hear examples of works well/gains a thumbs-up from you too!
Many thanks
Do you have any concerns/worries/preconceptions about meeting older people??"
I personally don't have many hang-ups! A little hesitant as this is all slightly new to me and understandably, wary of what an older couple would think of -me- and my experience.
Very interested in getting stuck in somehow though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One of my concerns with meeting so much younger is whether the age on the profile is accurate. I remember when I was 15 that we had a friend who looked older and used to get served for beer with no issues...I wouldn't want to make the same mistake and have social services round! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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with us its as young as our kids seems a bit strange - not wrong but seeing as we try and stay localish we dont want to happen upon a friend of theirs for one thing - when we set up the profile originally our range was older than now as we wanted to meet people that didnt strop over our not being able to meet and understanding why (so people more likely to understand were in our age range and similar situations) - we now are more flexible in our thoughts |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it's just commonality. Be that shared humour, shared life experiences etc.
If a 20 year old has it, I don't rule them out, so far there hasn't been one.
The 'youre my sons age' thing doesn't register with me I don't honestly care purely about an age gap.
I doubt 60 year Olds turn down 40 year Olds for that reason. |
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I don't have kids so I have no real hang up about age at all. If young men exhibit enough qualities I like I will meet them, and you are obviously intelligent and articulate. I prefer a beefier build generally myself, but I have no 'concerns'. I think good and bad lovers can be found in all age groups - certainly the guy I spent 3 years with in my teens was a wonderful lover. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It hasn't been a great advantage to me. That's always been a set back on here for me plus my 'look'. But, i can't change my age or how i am. They'll just have to accept me for me - well, they definately miss out on my kisses. I do love a good kiss you see.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We came onto this site looking for a younger guy 21 - 30 for my wife.
Over the last year we have met 4. Each time was not a great experience,either hopeless or couldnt get it up.
A older guy would be better in this respect and be able to hold a conversation.
Trouble is, the turn on for us is knowing shes sleeping with a much younger guy.
Where do you find someone who ticks all the boxes. Haven't found them yet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Are you specifically asking those who have met younger than them? How much younger are you talking about? I have met someone about 12 yrs younger than me once, wasn't all that, I've met a few who were a lot older than me; some good some not so good.
I am however guessing you are more interested in those half my age in which case, I don't have any concerns etc other than the fact that they are half my age and I prefer my own age group, even in a club I wouldn't play with anyone who I thought was too young for me.
As to meeting newbies, no big deal; being verified doesn't necessarily mean they will turn up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've my lower age limit set to 35, which is ten years younger. That said, if I were to meet someone younger who was had mental maturity then I wouldn't say no to someone in their twenties, but we'd really have to 'click'.
I prefer experienced, confident people which tends, for the most part, to be people around the same age as myself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are you specifically asking those who have met younger than them? How much younger are you talking about? I have met someone about 12 yrs younger than me once, wasn't all that, I've met a few who were a lot older than me; some good some not so good.
I am however guessing you are more interested in those half my age in which case, I don't have any concerns etc other than the fact that they are half my age and I prefer my own age group, even in a club I wouldn't play with anyone who I thought was too young for me.
As to meeting newbies, no big deal; being verified doesn't necessarily mean they will turn up "
Nah, not just those who -have- already met a younger person - either if you have or have just thought about it, but had small issues with it.
As for the age group, I do however mean those around my age group (18 to 23ish?). Like a few have said, after that age, thibgs become less of a problem or drawback.
Nice opinion on the verification though! A lot of people just strike me (and others) off due to lack of them, which makes getting going slightly more difficult Having said that - I 100% understand why they may do this! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We came onto this site looking for a younger guy 21 - 30 for my wife.
Over the last year we have met 4. Each time was not a great experience,either hopeless or couldnt get it up.
A older guy would be better in this respect and be able to hold a conversation.
Trouble is, the turn on for us is knowing shes sleeping with a much younger guy.
Where do you find someone who ticks all the boxes. Haven't found them yet."
Dealt an unlucky hand I guess! I can't see why anyone would mess up after lookibg at your profile. Shame on them! I hope you find somebody eventually... |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Go to a club.
Nobody wears age badges.
I started a thread many moons ago asking if the site removed ages from profiles and you simply had to decide who to meet based on photos and messages - would it change the way people interacted?
Can't remember what it was called.
I must be getting old.  
A
PS. There's a few years between Fox and I. Doesn't bother us and we met on here. Don't focus on your age OP - just dive in and be yourself. If 'yourself' attracts others - great. If not? There's probably little you can do about it!
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We came onto this site looking for a younger guy 21 - 30 for my wife.
Over the last year we have met 4. Each time was not a great experience,either hopeless or couldnt get it up.
A older guy would be better in this respect and be able to hold a conversation.
Trouble is, the turn on for us is knowing shes sleeping with a much younger guy.
Where do you find someone who ticks all the boxes. Haven't found them yet."
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So let me turn your question on you. What is it that precludes for you, over 50s?
Most of us need to make an arbitrary decision regarding age range if we're to avoid the dreaded 18 to 99 and our experience hasn't made us want to reconsider ours. |
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My lower age range is set at 25, but I have found that many who just pass that are a turn off by the way they speak to me.
I can pull in a club or bar with no bother so why should I be pathetically grateful to be called a milf and be prepared to drop everything to fuck some horny young dude right this minute? 
If age is just a number why is younger special?
I don't want to teach anyone or agree to anything because I should be grateful I'm getting to boff a younger man.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is it different for younger guys (as some have said on here - only ideas come from fake porno films) than for younger ladies.....often much more mature/grown up etc....
Had a few 23 and under who frankly turned into bunny boilers..... Also had a few (as young as 19) who turned out to be every bit as good as any others. Still very good friends with one (20) no longer on fab but I am her "escort" for her 21st.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So let me turn your question on you. What is it that precludes for you, over 50s?
Most of us need to make an arbitrary decision regarding age range if we're to avoid the dreaded 18 to 99 and our experience hasn't made us want to reconsider ours. "
Very good question! It's nice to have a discussion on that matter, too. As you've also said, I am against putting 18-99 as it either looks lazy or just plain desperate! I would never just 'hop in' with anyone so try to avoid that image. I've put my cut-off age as it is for a couple of reasons.
Firstly, as much as many people will say otherwise - I think from my age, meeting someone 50+ is just too big a gap. I have no issue communicating with people that age, but find it very rare that at that age, they'd be interested in me! Also, despite not rangin to 99, 50 gives me a lot of leeway as I'm only 20. Beyond 50, I tend to just not be as attracted as much. Honestly, it really differs from person to person - but you have to draw a line!
Having said all this, I'll happily talk to anyone of any age and do take things on a person-by-person basis |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
I have no problem meeting younger men, but found they have a problem with me. The media has given everyone a completely distorted _iew of women and they assume that all women over 40 look like Julia Roberts or Michelle Pfeiffer. I do tell them that, having had a child and a life, I am a bit saggy and, fuelled by hormones, they say that's fine. Then we meet and the look of disappointment is clear on their faces.
Young guys for a hard and fast one off shag in a club is fine, but for a one to one meet they can be hard work and poor conversationalists. I am of course generalising madly, but in my experience that's the case. Also, very young guys are less likely to be able to accommodate, or have the necessary spare cash to share a hotel. |
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"So let me turn your question on you. What is it that precludes for you, over 50s?
Most of us need to make an arbitrary decision regarding age range if we're to avoid the dreaded 18 to 99 and our experience hasn't made us want to reconsider ours.
Very good question! It's nice to have a discussion on that matter, too. As you've also said, I am against putting 18-99 as it either looks lazy or just plain desperate! I would never just 'hop in' with anyone so try to avoid that image. I've put my cut-off age as it is for a couple of reasons.
Firstly, as much as many people will say otherwise - I think from my age, meeting someone 50+ is just too big a gap. I have no issue communicating with people that age, but find it very rare that at that age, they'd be interested in me! Also, despite not rangin to 99, 50 gives me a lot of leeway as I'm only 20. Beyond 50, I tend to just not be as attracted as much. Honestly, it really differs from person to person - but you have to draw a line!
Having said all this, I'll happily talk to anyone of any age and do take things on a person-by-person basis "
I think you've probably answered your own question then .
We enjoy talking to people of all ages too, the old (er) have a lot to learn from the young (er) and vice versa...if only they'd damn well listen |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Haha, in some sense that's true. Shan't rule out the obvious point that opinions differ from person to person though! We all have our own tastes
Why can't we all just chit-chat hunky-dory and listen to good points?
(But nah, thanks for the good question!) |
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"Haha, in some sense that's true. Shan't rule out the obvious point that opinions differ from person to person though! We all have our own tastes
Why can't we all just chit-chat hunky-dory and listen to good points?
(But nah, thanks for the good question!)"
why not indeed, we're always happy to do that and I think you'll find lots of others are too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have no problem meeting younger men, but found they have a problem with me. The media has given everyone a completely distorted _iew of women and they assume that all women over 40 look like Julia Roberts or Michelle Pfeiffer. I do tell them that, having had a child and a life, I am a bit saggy and, fuelled by hormones, they say that's fine. Then we meet and the look of disappointment is clear on their faces.
Young guys for a hard and fast one off shag in a club is fine, but for a one to one meet they can be hard work and poor conversationalists. I am of course generalising madly, but in my experience that's the case. Also, very young guys are less likely to be able to accommodate, or have the necessary spare cash to share a hotel."
I think people basing their fantasy-to-reality experience purely on media representation is just silly. Every person has imperfections... And when meeting it's safe to assume your play-partner may have some parts they don't find perfect about you, too. Silly (other) young guys...
It's true about the accommodation issue though. A lot of us find it hard to have our own place at this age (stuck in shared accommodation or with parents)... But that's just what most have to live with :P Hotels aren't -so- bad... Just wouldn't be a regular occupancy for me, haha. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Being young wouldn't put me off a man. I would talk to him to see if there was an attraction the same as with a man older than me "
Chat away. We don't bite |
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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago
south staffs |
I have sons under 30 and because of them I have no trouble talking to young guys and having something in common with them.
I like young guys because they feel good to touch, they look good (the ones I choose do ! lol), they have lots of stamina (mostly) and can often repeat.
They are eager to learn and try things.
I have met a few "whooops - one-shot-wonders" who felt they had to run away rather than stay for a cosy time and try again.
For accommodation you can't beat a motorhome.
Jane x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One our best meets was with a 19 yr old lad. He was so respectful and was totaly amazing. Everyones diffrent age really doesnt matter as long as its legal |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"One our best meets was with a 19 yr old lad. He was so respectful and was totaly amazing. Everyones diffrent age really doesnt matter as long as its legal "
Fancy meeting another? (It was worth a try, haha.)
Either way, I hope to become that respectful and fun guy people hope for. All in due time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do like younger guys too. My cut off age is 26-26.I have a 20 year old son. So anyone his age wouldn't seem right
Not only do I find younger guys more respectful. In and out of the bedroom. They are eager to please, have stamina and like go repeat.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do like younger guys too. My cut off age is 26-26.I have a 20 year old son. So anyone his age wouldn't seem right
Not only do I find younger guys more respectful. In and out of the bedroom. They are eager to please, have stamina and like go repeat.
"
Very true we have had a meet with an older guy that was like a scared rabbit lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being young wouldn't put me off a man. I would talk to him to see if there was an attraction the same as with a man older than me
Chat away. We don't bite "
some do. Some tie you to their bed too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One our best meets was with a 19 yr old lad. He was so respectful and was totaly amazing. Everyones diffrent age really doesnt matter as long as its legal
Fancy meeting another? (It was worth a try, haha.)
Either way, I hope to become that respectful and fun guy people hope for. All in due time!"
Dont ask u dont get  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Being young wouldn't put me off a man. I would talk to him to see if there was an attraction the same as with a man older than me
Chat away. We don't bite
some do. Some tie you to their bed too "
I was obviously being too innocent in my reply Oh well, if it works - can't knock it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have no problem meeting younger men, but found they have a problem with me. The media has given everyone a completely distorted _iew of women and they assume that all women over 40 look like Julia Roberts or Michelle Pfeiffer. I do tell them that, having had a child and a life, I am a bit saggy and, fuelled by hormones, they say that's fine. Then we meet and the look of disappointment is clear on their faces.
Young guys for a hard and fast one off shag in a club is fine, but for a one to one meet they can be hard work and poor conversationalists. I am of course generalising madly, but in my experience that's the case. Also, very young guys are less likely to be able to accommodate, or have the necessary spare cash to share a hotel."
That's one of the reasons I won't meet young lads as I wouldn't want them thinking they're going to meet a stunning model and instead get a plain jane |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
threads like these in a way are a waste of time....
people always find a way of complaining about the things that exclude them... be that age or any other of a million examples....
its like they are trying to convince people who are not going to have their minds changed... chasing the impossible!
people are always going to have preferences... wouldn't it may more sense to concentrate on those people who are more likely to be receptive, than to work on those who are never going to be swayed....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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my kids are both in their 20s and i would feel weird sleeping with anyone their age, basically if I am old enough to have given birth to you, I am not going to have sex with you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"threads like these in a way are a waste of time....
people always find a way of complaining about the things that exclude them... be that age or any other of a million examples....
its like they are trying to convince people who are not going to have their minds changed... chasing the impossible!
people are always going to have preferences... wouldn't it may more sense to concentrate on those people who are more likely to be receptive, than to work on those who are never going to be swayed....
"
"This post is more of an open question (and for discussion?)."
Just discussing - I'm not looking to change anyone's opinion, just hearing them out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"threads like these in a way are a waste of time....
people always find a way of complaining about the things that exclude them... be that age or any other of a million examples....
its like they are trying to convince people who are not going to have their minds changed... chasing the impossible!
people are always going to have preferences... wouldn't it may more sense to concentrate on those people who are more likely to be receptive, than to work on those who are never going to be swayed....
"
Not sure it's a complete waste of time for the OP in this instance. He's garnered opinion and actually shown himself to be mature and interested in what people have to say, I'd just call that learning. And if he's savvy enough to pick up on cues I think someone on this thread might be a possible meet for him.
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"threads like these in a way are a waste of time....
people always find a way of complaining about the things that exclude them... be that age or any other of a million examples....
its like they are trying to convince people who are not going to have their minds changed... chasing the impossible!
people are always going to have preferences... wouldn't it may more sense to concentrate on those people who are more likely to be receptive, than to work on those who are never going to be swayed....
Not sure it's a complete waste of time for the OP in this instance. He's garnered opinion and actually shown himself to be mature and interested in what people have to say, I'd just call that learning. And if he's savvy enough to pick up on cues I think someone on this thread might be a possible meet for him.
"
Absolutely - the OP was not being in the slightest bit negative, has not been the entire thread! I think he has been a poster boy for the maturity and positivity of some young men. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"threads like these in a way are a waste of time....
people always find a way of complaining about the things that exclude them... be that age or any other of a million examples....
its like they are trying to convince people who are not going to have their minds changed... chasing the impossible!
people are always going to have preferences... wouldn't it may more sense to concentrate on those people who are more likely to be receptive, than to work on those who are never going to be swayed....
Not sure it's a complete waste of time for the OP in this instance. He's garnered opinion and actually shown himself to be mature and interested in what people have to say, I'd just call that learning. And if he's savvy enough to pick up on cues I think someone on this thread might be a possible meet for him.
"
I'm notoriously dim on picking up subtle hints, oh dear! Now you'll get me scanning over and over to find such prospects, haha!
Honestly just for discussion but wouldn't say no to something coming of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm young. I've never had a problem with getting meets from anyone. Either younger or older. Not even when I was newbie. Had my first meet the day after I joined. Maybe I just got lucky  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm young. I've never had a problem with getting meets from anyone. Either younger or older. Not even when I was newbie. Had my first meet the day after I joined. Maybe I just got lucky "
I'm hopeful as you are that this is possible but there's no denying it's less likely for a chap to achieve this because of the numbers. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm young. I've never had a problem with getting meets from anyone. Either younger or older. Not even when I was newbie. Had my first meet the day after I joined. Maybe I just got lucky "
Oh, the easy life
(To be fair, I'm not sure how I'd handle being a woman on here. Sieving through the masses of messages each day must be a right pain in the ass. Easier, though!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm young. I've never had a problem with getting meets from anyone. Either younger or older. Not even when I was newbie. Had my first meet the day after I joined. Maybe I just got lucky "
You're a female, far easier for you to get a meet than single males  |
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"Hey all,
This post is more of an open question (and for discussion?)... But what are all of your concerns/worries/preconceptions/stereotypes you have regarding meeting younger people. Younger guys, girls or just newbies to the scene's
scene!
Although I suppose this is focusing on.the negatives, it's also nice to hear examples of works well/gains a thumbs-up from you too!
Many thanks
"
The way I play it only works with certain men: not men young enough to be my child or old enough to be my dad. I don't look any deeper than that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My preference is for younger men and at 49 my age range is now set at 34 - 44. It was younger at one stage but I changed it when I returned on this profile.
I think it all depends on the person really. Some much younger people show great maturity but I'd still have a cut off point of 20 years younger than me. Any younger and it just wouldn't feel right.
My main concern would be what we'd have in common to chat about. I did once meet someone half my age when I was 42 and it was a great meet. |
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