FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Can Fuck Buddies Last Without Love??
Can Fuck Buddies Last Without Love??
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You see lots of references to FBs on Fab, and I've often wondered how these relationships work.
I may be old-fashioned, but if two people repeatedly meet for sex, surely one or both will eventually become emotionally attached and want more from the relationship?
Or am I missing what being a FB is all about? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What about a friendship... Surely that endures.... We have been playing together for a year now.. and we care obviously but it's a friendship..
You do not need love to maintain a fb relationship... But both need to want the Same things x |
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I love both my fb's equally and dearly. They are my best friends. At no point have either party wanted more, we've known where we stand from the beginning. We've known each other now for around 6 years. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What about a friendship... Surely that endures.... We have been playing together for a year now.. and we care obviously but it's a friendship..
You do not need love to maintain a fb relationship... But both need to want the Same things x"
OK, that makes sense. But does that mean you openly agree it won't ever turn into something deeper? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What about a friendship... Surely that endures.... We have been playing together for a year now.. and we care obviously but it's a friendship..
You do not need love to maintain a fb relationship... But both need to want the Same things x
OK, that makes sense. But does that mean you openly agree it won't ever turn into something deeper?"
In our case yes... Of course you can't promise it won't ever happen..but being honest and respecting one another helps xx |
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With my ex fwb he wanted to settle so we stopped fucking and playing together. I am far too emotionally fucked up for a relationship beyond sex right now. We are still good friends and I love him like I do any of my friends. I'm perfectly happy with my choice to be single until my girls have grown up |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love both my fb's equally and dearly. They are my best friends. At no point have either party wanted more, we've known where we stand from the beginning. We've known each other now for around 6 years. "
Wow, 6 years. Well that proves they can last |
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"I love both my fb's equally and dearly. They are my best friends. At no point have either party wanted more, we've known where we stand from the beginning. We've known each other now for around 6 years. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What about a friendship... Surely that endures.... We have been playing together for a year now.. and we care obviously but it's a friendship..
You do not need love to maintain a fb relationship... But both need to want the Same things x
OK, that makes sense. But does that mean you openly agree it won't ever turn into something deeper?
In our case yes... Of course you can't promise it won't ever happen..but being honest and respecting one another helps xx "
OK, thanks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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fb/fwb rarely work long term.
One or both will usually end up developing feelings, and not always the female half.
Whether they are honest about that, is a different matter |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im almost certain there is a degree of emotional attachment, even if its just a love for the sex they provide, rather than the person, otherwise i cant imagine the sex being very good.
that said, i see many people on here saying they are going out for dinner with a fb or meeting for a drink and so on, so i suppose its rare that it is purely only a meet for sex and leave afterwards kind of arrangement |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have been "Buddies who play" or whatever else it is called, for 7 years now and have had some wonderful adventures.
Its about friendship on another level and realising that the wonderful world of swinging is something special for those who enjoy it without the complications of a relationship.
(Apologies to the OP for my post from Bahia... Meant to write through our Joint Profile... Her's is Suzy K by the way)
Whatever you are called or like , have fun !!! xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Been with my fb for well over 10 years . It works because we both want the same things and never ask each other for anything more than the other can give |
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I have had a really great friend with benefits for well over three years. Due to a change in circumstances, the "benefits" have stopped, but we are still good friends and there will always be a wee spot for him in my life. For me it wasn't just the sex, but the giggles, laughter and also being able to have someone I trusted to talk to. The sex may have gone but everything else is still there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away. "
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too? |
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"For those who have had fb's for many years. Does this mean you haven't had any sort of relationship or dated anyone during this time?
Just curious how it works"
My 2 fb's who I mentioned above are married to each other.
I have had various relationships and dated during the 6 years we have 'been' together, but I've never been a long term, exclusive type of person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For those who have had fb's for many years. Does this mean you haven't had any sort of relationship or dated anyone during this time?
Just curious how it works"
I meet others but as I have no intention of dating anyone it works well for me xx |
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We can't speak for others but as a couple we are very much in love with each other.
But we also have a bi male FB. He comes round when we want to spice things up, he fucks, he leaves.
He is also married and has a life far beyond us. It is quite simply a matter of convenience for us. So we have no problems with the issue of 'falling' for the fuck buddy.  |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
"For those who have had fb's for many years. Does this mean you haven't had any sort of relationship or dated anyone during this time?
Just curious how it works"
I have other meets, as does he. I do not date and have no desire to get into a relationship. Best of both worlds for me presently. |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?"
It really isn't. And certainly not for me. May be different for others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What about a friendship... Surely that endures.... We have been playing together for a year now.. and we care obviously but it's a friendship..
You do not need love to maintain a fb relationship... But both need to want the Same things x
OK, that makes sense. But does that mean you openly agree it won't ever turn into something deeper?
In our case yes... Of course you can't promise it won't ever happen..but being honest and respecting one another helps xx "
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"For those who have had fb's for many years. Does this mean you haven't had any sort of relationship or dated anyone during this time?
Just curious how it works"
I've been seeing my FWB for 8 years. In that time I've had a 6 month relationship and he's had a 13 month relationship. The whole point of a FWB/FB relationship is that there is not supposed to be jealousy and exclusivity, and we can move together and apart as things move on.
Like DB9 Queen though I am no longer interested in an exclusive relationship and am happy to have no strings attached fun, whether with my long term FB, or with a series of very short term meets.  |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?"
So you ask how to switch off love, and berate the answer given because it's not the one you want to hear.
Why ask the question if you dont want an honest response? 
If you are looking for a fb - get an fb. If you are looking for a bf or future husband - find a lover. (As I pointed out in my first post .... right at the very top ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?
So you ask how to switch off love, and berate the answer given because it's not the one you want to hear.
Why ask the question if you dont want an honest response?
If you are looking for a fb - get an fb. If you are looking for a bf or future husband - find a lover. (As I pointed out in my first post .... right at the very top )"
Thanks for the 'education'. Now here's a little in return...
Somebody adds a point of discussion, somebody challenges it, it's challenged back etc. etc. Known as debate. My opinion on the suggestion that you can turn emotions on or off, is that it doesn't make sense. I therefore gave my opinion accordingly and that has been responded to.
If that came across as 'berating' to your sensitive disposition, well that's unfortunate.
What your final paragraph has to do with the discussion, I have no idea. |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?
So you ask how to switch off love, and berate the answer given because it's not the one you want to hear.
Why ask the question if you dont want an honest response?
If you are looking for a fb - get an fb. If you are looking for a bf or future husband - find a lover. (As I pointed out in my first post .... right at the very top )
Thanks for the 'education'. Now here's a little in return...
Somebody adds a point of discussion, somebody challenges it, it's challenged back etc. etc. Known as debate. My opinion on the suggestion that you can turn emotions on or off, is that it doesn't make sense. I therefore gave my opinion accordingly and that has been responded to.
If that came across as 'berating' to your sensitive disposition, well that's unfortunate.
What your final paragraph has to do with the discussion, I have no idea."
You have a strange (if not unfortunate) sense of communication if you think the adage of "nonsense" in reply to someone is an opening to discussion. It is an end statement. It is opinion yes but also condemnation of what is being said. It is a judgement and a closed comment with imposed right and wrong. When you consider discussion: "nonsense" isn't a usual spur of conversation. Sensitive or not, and cross examining or deflecting as you are, I think you realise too that you cant see the top of that well dug hole, never mind 'discuss' your way out of it? Maybe?  |
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"You see lots of references to FBs on Fab, and I've often wondered how these relationships work.
I may be old-fashioned, but if two people repeatedly meet for sex, surely one or both will eventually become emotionally attached and want more from the relationship?
Or am I missing what being a FB is all about?"
I had a couple of friends with benefits for six years. Only ended when I met my other half but I'm still in contact with them as they're friends. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?
So you ask how to switch off love, and berate the answer given because it's not the one you want to hear.
Why ask the question if you dont want an honest response?
If you are looking for a fb - get an fb. If you are looking for a bf or future husband - find a lover. (As I pointed out in my first post .... right at the very top )
Thanks for the 'education'. Now here's a little in return...
Somebody adds a point of discussion, somebody challenges it, it's challenged back etc. etc. Known as debate. My opinion on the suggestion that you can turn emotions on or off, is that it doesn't make sense. I therefore gave my opinion accordingly and that has been responded to.
If that came across as 'berating' to your sensitive disposition, well that's unfortunate.
What your final paragraph has to do with the discussion, I have no idea.
You have a strange (if not unfortunate) sense of communication if you think the adage of "nonsense" in reply to someone is an opening to discussion. It is an end statement. It is opinion yes but also condemnation of what is being said. It is a judgement and a closed comment with imposed right and wrong. When you consider discussion: "nonsense" isn't a usual spur of conversation. Sensitive or not, and cross examining or deflecting as you are, I think you realise too that you cant see the top of that well dug hole, never mind 'discuss' your way out of it? Maybe? "
Having viewed your profile I can understand your sensitivity. A little ironic maybe.
'Nonsense' is an opinion. I stand by it, nothing I've read has convinced me otherwise so far, least of all your input. |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"So how do you switch off love then?
Don't fall in love in the first place. If you do, walk away.
What nonsense.
Does that mean you can just 'turn it on' too?
So you ask how to switch off love, and berate the answer given because it's not the one you want to hear.
Why ask the question if you dont want an honest response?
If you are looking for a fb - get an fb. If you are looking for a bf or future husband - find a lover. (As I pointed out in my first post .... right at the very top )
Thanks for the 'education'. Now here's a little in return...
Somebody adds a point of discussion, somebody challenges it, it's challenged back etc. etc. Known as debate. My opinion on the suggestion that you can turn emotions on or off, is that it doesn't make sense. I therefore gave my opinion accordingly and that has been responded to.
If that came across as 'berating' to your sensitive disposition, well that's unfortunate.
What your final paragraph has to do with the discussion, I have no idea.
You have a strange (if not unfortunate) sense of communication if you think the adage of "nonsense" in reply to someone is an opening to discussion. It is an end statement. It is opinion yes but also condemnation of what is being said. It is a judgement and a closed comment with imposed right and wrong. When you consider discussion: "nonsense" isn't a usual spur of conversation. Sensitive or not, and cross examining or deflecting as you are, I think you realise too that you cant see the top of that well dug hole, never mind 'discuss' your way out of it? Maybe?
Having viewed your profile I can understand your sensitivity. A little ironic maybe.
'Nonsense' is an opinion. I stand by it, nothing I've read has convinced me otherwise so far, least of all your input."
 Heartbreaking  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And now, as yet another interesting thread descends into irrelevant bickering, I'd like to say thanks to all the people who commented . The subject would make for a terrific human-interest article in Cosmopolitan (no, I'm not a journo) |
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You can become good friends yeah, but love crosses a line for me personally.
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