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'Owned by...'
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"It's been commonplace in BDSM for years." Just hadn't noticed it as much on Fab as I have lately. | |||
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"i'd love to be owned by my FWB "they wouldnt be your fwd then though? | |||
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"Im owned by the Halifax and Barclaycard" Ah but do they give other banks permission to fuck you good and proper? | |||
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"Im owned by the Halifax and Barclaycard Ah but do they give other banks permission to fuck you good and proper? "Nah, theyre too busy fucking me left, right and centre themselves  | |||
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"Im owned by the Halifax and Barclaycard Ah but do they give other banks permission to fuck you good and proper?
Nah, theyre too busy fucking me left, right and centre themselves "Lol  | |||
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"50 shades innit..... Too many people thinking they know all about bdsm cos they read a few books" No 50 Shade crap in my life...  | |||
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"I'm not saying that is the only thing that has made purple talk about it but the amount of my vanilla friends who think that 50 shades is what bsdm is actually like astounds me......." I know lol, it is housewife porn lol | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab? "That's a usual saying on fetlife.com as its all S&M, Fetish, Slaves, Mistress/Master stuff & they list who they own etc. | |||
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"Not sure on the fifty shades thing lol, it is a BDSM thing, it is also a good thing on the profile, as it let's people know she has has a master/ sir. So therefore it will be down to his consent if you can have her. Depending of course how far they practice this, normally if owned its fully. Her" Recently noticed a friend's profile stating this. I have no interest in seeking consent as it holds no attraction for me. I'm obviously displaying dom tendencies!  | |||
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"Not sure on the fifty shades thing lol, it is a BDSM thing, it is also a good thing on the profile, as it let's people know she has has a master/ sir. So therefore it will be down to his consent if you can have her. Depending of course how far they practice this, normally if owned its fully. Her Recently noticed a friend's profile stating this. I have no interest in seeking consent as it holds no attraction for me. I'm obviously displaying dom tendencies! "your friend is owned he has taken her, the consent thing a done thing, maybe if you found a sub/ slave you will see fully, if your into that. | |||
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"Im owned by the Halifax and Barclaycard" Ha ha excellent! Lol | |||
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"It's good to see so many of us kinksters on here, owned or otherwise " | |||
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"I thought that was pwned?" Maybe...but Google 'he just owned you'
I'm down with da yoof innit...haha.x | |||
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"Masters must be crap if the subs are subletting themselves out to others without permission " | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect." it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning." oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing?" do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around" is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do. | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do." That would be a Master ordering his slave to do that. As far as know a Dom wouldn't expect anything of the kind from his Sub  | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning." What makes them a shit shag?? | |||
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"Funny thing is...I've been propositioned by a couple of so called 'owned subs' a true owned sub would never dream of that...even with masters Consent they should see it as a test and tread very carefully..x" Maybe they were told to sort it xx | |||
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"Funny thing is...I've been propositioned by a couple of so called 'owned subs' a true owned sub would never dream of that...even with masters Consent they should see it as a test and tread very carefully..x Maybe they were told to sort it xx" | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do." One I can remember she wanted me to come on her right tit. (I shit you not and I only found out when I got there) Never happened, I had travelled over 40 miles, she saw my cock, got my fingers in her.. and, well.. couldnt resist herself. The other - (a sub without master) she was just poncing around, throwing all these moves, I couldnt get a handle on her at all. But every time I moved or moved her, she was just very weird in her behavious or telling me not to do things we hadnt discussed. Thinking about it she was heading up the stairs and it was me that stopped her and asked general do's and donts prior to doing so. | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. What makes them a shit shag??" A lot of things. Inexperience essentially. If I meet a woman that says she has been a sub for 2-3 yrs you expect a few things as a given. When you get an odd look at a 2" butt plug you start to realise you will be starting from scratch. | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do. One I can remember she wanted me to come on her right tit. (I shit you not and I only found out when I got there) Never happened, I had travelled over 40 miles, she saw my cock, got my fingers in her.. and, well.. couldnt resist herself. The other - (a sub without master) she was just poncing around, throwing all these moves, I couldnt get a handle on her at all. But every time I moved or moved her, she was just very weird in her behavious or telling me not to do things we hadnt discussed. Thinking about it she was heading up the stairs and it was me that stopped her and asked general do's and donts prior to doing so." ok looking back, do you think there actually was a master at all? And these moves, how do you mean? And had you spoken to the master if there was one? Some subs are sent out by their masters, but there would of been instructions, boundaries set.had she been told to be submissive to you, or just vanilla sex? | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. What makes them a shit shag?? A lot of things. Inexperience essentially. If I meet a woman that says she has been a sub for 2-3 yrs you expect a few things as a given. When you get an odd look at a 2" butt plug you start to realise you will be starting from scratch. " I'm slightly lost, although had to have a good chuckle at your previous post. From your profile pics I'm guessing you are some sort of dom/master? Or just an owner of a very large collection of sex toys? When you say you expect a few things as a 'given'... Can you elaborate? Does meeting someone who states being sub, imply that they will be receiving a butt plug or other insertion? | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do. One I can remember she wanted me to come on her right tit. (I shit you not and I only found out when I got there) Never happened, I had travelled over 40 miles, she saw my cock, got my fingers in her.. and, well.. couldnt resist herself. The other - (a sub without master) she was just poncing around, throwing all these moves, I couldnt get a handle on her at all. But every time I moved or moved her, she was just very weird in her behavious or telling me not to do things we hadnt discussed. Thinking about it she was heading up the stairs and it was me that stopped her and asked general do's and donts prior to doing so. ok looking back, do you think there actually was a master at all? And these moves, how do you mean? And had you spoken to the master if there was one? Some subs are sent out by their masters, but there would of been instructions, boundaries set.had she been told to be submissive to you, or just vanilla sex?" I am a little familiar with alt life .. just I enjoy a vanilla lifestyle | |||
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"i'd love to be owned by my FWB
they wouldnt be your fwd then though?"they would because we discussed it, we would have a d/s "relationship" but kept in the FWB zone. And if it all goes tits up, we can still be friends, we have nothing to lose apart from being intimate with each other | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. oh right, you say a Shit shag, and what is the master doing? do you mean is he there in the room? On the occasions where I have met "subs" off here - the master hasnt been around is he giving instruction ? Or giving his own boundaries. Some subs are instructed to do that, if he says fuck a stranger or something of that nature, that's what she has to do. That would be a Master ordering his slave to do that. As far as know a Dom wouldn't expect anything of the kind from his Sub "yes your right a slave, but I have come across masters who only practice in the bedroom, let their sub ask, but refusal from him is the last word, I have even seen some subs on here do it, at masters order, but master always has the last word. | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. What makes them a shit shag?? A lot of things. Inexperience essentially. If I meet a woman that says she has been a sub for 2-3 yrs you expect a few things as a given. When you get an odd look at a 2" butt plug you start to realise you will be starting from scratch. " Why would that mean they have no experience .. I know many subs that would not entertain a butt plug | |||
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" I'm slightly lost, although had to have a good chuckle at your previous post. From your profile pics I'm guessing you are some sort of dom/master? Or just an owner of a very large collection of sex toys? When you say you expect a few things as a 'given'... Can you elaborate? Does meeting someone who states being sub, imply that they will be receiving a butt plug or other insertion? " God, I didnt mean to raise this much attention. No I am not a Dom/Master - cant stand the assumed pretence (or responsibility lol). When I say you expect a few things as a given, I mean you expect a 'sub' (a sub is different to a submissive) to have had training. Training can be in a lot of things yes but restraint/plugs/clamps/whips/ropes/spanking and should be easy things to cope with or at least be familiar with or at least be an enjoyment when meeting. I am by no means generic on meets, just the one that sprang to mind as I wrote the previous, I pulled out a few toys and instead of a smile or an eagerness - I got a wft look. (It's not 2" long and not even an inch wide) | |||
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" Why would that mean they have no experience .. I know many subs that would not entertain a butt plug " you had to be there  | |||
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" I am by no means generic on meets, just the one that sprang to mind as I wrote the previous, I pulled out a few toys and instead of a smile or an eagerness - I got a wft look. (It's not 2" long and not even an inch wide) " PMSL
My thoughts are, that all subs are different as everyone has different needs. Not all subs will have received the training you speak of. Many subs, are mentally submissive to the point of handing control of their body and mind to someone. If however, they been with a master, then they probably will have been trained. Probably best to have the conversation before pulling out the spiked butt plug with detachable pump! | |||
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" I am by no means generic on meets, just the one that sprang to mind as I wrote the previous, I pulled out a few toys and instead of a smile or an eagerness - I got a wft look. (It's not 2" long and not even an inch wide) PMSL
My thoughts are, that all subs are different as everyone has different needs. Not all subs will have received the training you speak of. Many subs, are mentally submissive to the point of handing control of their body and mind to someone. If however, they been with a master, then they probably will have been trained. Probably best to have the conversation before pulling out the spiked butt plug with detachable pump! "So at least you can appreciate there are differences. I said earlier, there are very fine but very important differences in what people say, and what they mean. The other thread on "I want a slave" is the perfect example of someone wanting, but not realising the meaning. As I say. I am not the generic type | |||
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"I think some masters train in their own individual way. But they all have the same understanding as each other, but one masters rules can differ from the next." Some masters are also a complete joke too lol. what 'same understanding' are masters supposed to have ? ? | |||
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"50 shades innit..... Too many people thinking they know all about bdsm cos they read a few books No 50 Shade crap in my life... "never read it but ownership mmmmm | |||
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"It's all too confusing "And too much like hard work. Someone has pointed out (above) that each master seems to have different rules for and expectations of their slave and how you will interact with them. Fuck that for a game of sodgers. | |||
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"I think some masters train in their own individual way. But they all have the same understanding as each other, but one masters rules can differ from the next." Agree, but I do think from training my sub for 7 years it does follow a pattern. In MY control knickers have not been allowed for all this time without permission and she must submit to going to a torturer monthly or less to get her 'cunt' made hairles When we meet my hand will check if she wearing knickers under skirt - trousers and jeans are never permitted as they do provent the master access to the cunt. I demand to know when she has wanked - we don't live together. And also the bedroom especially will have the whips, floggers hung up and also at the moment a chalk board for tests - that she will fail and the cruel master/teacher will punish usually flogging or whipping the tits or cunt. She 'hates' candle play and 'hates' having a candle burning away in her cunt or wax dripped onto her. BDSM is different to swinging for her and why she is not on here she has fantacies about be taken by men - and not concentual as swinging his. And I know from the intensity of her orgasms that seemed to be ripped out of her almost its seems against her will as a good girl. I am allowed to swing as she has her BDSM needs and wants as we have been to fetish clubs, which she loved and me less so as swinging clubs does ir more for me.. Its a great relationship. | |||
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"I wish you could edit text after posting but hopefully you get the idea above." It read ok | |||
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I would love to expand my knowledge and explore my submissive tendencies with a 'proper' Dom, not just someone who thinks it's about being rough or telling me to do stuff by text message before I've ever met them | |||
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"My bottom is 'the property of Toshn' But only in a fun way
I would love to expand my knowledge and explore my submissive tendencies with a 'proper' Dom, not just someone who thinks it's about being rough or telling me to do stuff by text message before I've ever met them "If you have a submissive side, its an amazing experience to bring it out and enjoy it, but, yes a proper Dom is needed. Not some guy who thinks he is because he can be rough and slap your butt xx | |||
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"I think some masters train in their own individual way. But they all have the same understanding as each other, but one masters rules can differ from the next. Some masters are also a complete joke too lol. what 'same understanding' are masters supposed to have ? ?" I agree, there are what they call " plastic masters" think a red arse, a few dominant words and job done, a master will train his sub for many years, as it takes that long, an honour to be collars by him. But as you say some can be a joke, one week and they think " job done" | |||
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"I think some masters train in their own individual way. But they all have the same understanding as each other, but one masters rules can differ from the next. Agree, but I do think from training my sub for 7 years it does follow a pattern. In MY control knickers have not been allowed for all this time without permission and she must submit to going to a torturer monthly or less to get her 'cunt' made hairles When we meet my hand will check if she wearing knickers under skirt - trousers and jeans are never permitted as they do provent the master access to the cunt. I demand to know when she has wanked - we don't live together. And also the bedroom especially will have the whips, floggers hung up and also at the moment a chalk board for tests - that she will fail and the cruel master/teacher will punish usually flogging or whipping the tits or cunt. She 'hates' candle play and 'hates' having a candle burning away in her cunt or wax dripped onto her. BDSM is different to swinging for her and why she is not on here she has fantacies about be taken by men - and not concentual as swinging his. And I know from the intensity of her orgasms that seemed to be ripped out of her almost its seems against her will as a good girl. I am allowed to swing as she has her BDSM needs and wants as we have been to fetish clubs, which she loved and me less so as swinging clubs does ir more for me.. I like this, the commands in itself a turn on. Its a great relationship. " | |||
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" One meet and suddenly they're owned......yeah I can see it lastly all of a week "Known as a Velcro collar. | |||
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"It's good to see so many of us kinksters on here, owned or otherwise
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" One meet and suddenly they're owned......yeah I can see it lastly all of a week
Known as a Velcro collar. "Musical Doms , some subs play that all the time | |||
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"Sounds a bit intimidating to me... didn't realise it was to do with bdsm though - thought it just meant that the 'owner' chose how the 'owned' behaved sexually and especially who with (permission to play with others etc..)" I can see if no one has shown no interest in the subject to be intimidating to some. There are lot that that see the master/ sir as a brutal bastard, and the sub as a mug, this is far from the truth, it has to be enjoyed by two people, the subs I have also come across are of strong mind too. | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab? "People like to state it as its all about show with some others its lifestyle it depends how you look in it. | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab?
People like to state it as its all about show with some others its lifestyle it depends how you look in it. "I agree some don't know the meaning of owned, its all a laugh to some. | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab?
People like to state it as its all about show with some others its lifestyle it depends how you look in it. I agree some don't know the meaning of owned, its all a laugh to some."I wouldn't say laugh just a desperation to stand out or get attention or be asked about it we have seen it all too often and these days its pretty sad in many occasions as its usually less secure people have to shout to let people they are in some sort of relationship. | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab?
People like to state it as its all about show with some others its lifestyle it depends how you look in it. I agree some don't know the meaning of owned, its all a laugh to some.
I wouldn't say laugh just a desperation to stand out or get attention or be asked about it we have seen it all too often and these days its pretty sad in many occasions as its usually less secure people have to shout to let people they are in some sort of relationship. "yes! That was a word I should of chosen too desperation, they have no idea of the subject. I see some posts of some people doing things for keeping the other happy,that's very insecure, if man or woman doesn't have their own mind they should not be doing it. | |||
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"Have to say Catholic women especially seem to enjoy BDSM "That is something new I have learnt, is the thrill of the forbidden? | |||
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"Its confessing your sins to man in power thing I think." oh yes! I can see that, I bet that's thrilling too. | |||
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"My bottom is 'the property of Toshn' But only in a fun way
I would love to expand my knowledge and explore my submissive tendencies with a 'proper' Dom, not just someone who thinks it's about being rough or telling me to do stuff by text message before I've ever met them "you realise "property" means you are meat, a slave, have no worth, you are available to rent out even. This is what annoys me (mildly), there is a level of experience or ability that you assume when someone has 'slave' or whatever written on them or in their profile. Yet they have no understanding of what it entails. As you say 'it's only fun' - yet you are telling everyone that basically... you are valueless as a human being and are instead, being used as someone wishes, without regard for what they do to 'it' (the property). | |||
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"My bottom is 'the property of Toshn' But only in a fun way
I would love to expand my knowledge and explore my submissive tendencies with a 'proper' Dom, not just someone who thinks it's about being rough or telling me to do stuff by text message before I've ever met them
you realise "property" means you are meat, a slave, have no worth, you are available to rent out even. This is what annoys me (mildly), there is a level of experience or ability that you assume when someone has 'slave' or whatever written on them or in their profile. Yet they have no understanding of what it entails. As you say 'it's only fun' - yet you are telling everyone that basically... you are valueless as a human being and are instead, being used as someone wishes, without regard for what they do to 'it' (the property). "I have to say here that having no value is a bit wrong, the used and abused is meant to be enjoyable by both, and the sub actually has more power than the Dom, I think the lady in general is having a giggle at that part, and the man in question I have never met but spoken to on the phone and is a lovely man, I think she was talking as a laugh | |||
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"Sounds a bit intimidating to me... didn't realise it was to do with bdsm though - thought it just meant that the 'owner' chose how the 'owned' behaved sexually and especially who with (permission to play with others etc..)" It means exactly what the owner wants it to mean. There are varying degrees, but for the most it means that when they say jump, you say how high. It also means someone else is not to touch - that you are the sole pleasure of someone else. To me, it does have the adage of experience - others may not care less, but I wont contact anyone who is owned. If I meet someone that say they have been owned, then I'd expect training to have been undertook, and as a result harder play to at least be an option. | |||
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" I have to say here that having no value is a bit wrong, the used and abused is meant to be enjoyable by both, and the sub actually has more power than the Dom, I think the lady in general is having a giggle at that part, and the man in question I have never met but spoken to on the phone and is a lovely man, I think she was talking as a laugh "There are different levels of submission. Being a sub or submissive does not make you property. Being a sub or submissive does not mean you have been owned. Being 'property' means exactly that. You are a commodity to be used as the owner sees fit. If they do not want to use that property for 5 months they have the option to do that, but when they want to use it, it is available. You are there for when and whatever the "dom" needs you. To me effective a prostitute (though others may disagree) this is how I see it. You are trying to bend what is understood as submission - when in fact 'property' is as said - a commodity (of value yes) but nothing more than that. | |||
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"Im owned by the Halifax and Barclaycard Ah but do they give other banks permission to fuck you good and proper?
Nah, theyre too busy fucking me left, right and centre themselves "LMAO...me too... | |||
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"I can understand the rest of what your saying yes, but as a sub myself I take offence to the prostitute part "you are trying to say that power is a given to anyone that is submissive though. Which is wrong. It doesnt apply to a slave, it doesnt apply to property, or meat. These are not titles only doms give. They are titles many women want. Some women like that worthlessness, that humiliation. I am not calling you a prostitute, I am informing you of what I interpret the term "property" means to me. | |||
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"I can understand the rest of what your saying yes, but as a sub myself I take offence to the prostitute part "Me too !!! I think a lot of people are confusing a submissive and a slave, two very different things and unless you have a knowledge and understanding of this sort of thing, you won't have a clue | |||
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"What really pisses me off about Dommes is the whole 'tribute' nonsense. For those who don't know, it's where Dommes expect to be given stuff (presents and money) by their sub(s)." I've heard of that, didn't know it was a regular thing with dommes though? | |||
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"What really pisses me off about Dommes is the whole 'tribute' nonsense. For those who don't know, it's where Dommes expect to be given stuff (presents and money) by their sub(s)." They have silly subs then, the gift of submission is always enough | |||
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"What really pisses me off about Dommes is the whole 'tribute' nonsense. For those who don't know, it's where Dommes expect to be given stuff (presents and money) by their sub(s). I've heard of that, didn't know it was a regular thing with dommes though?" Oh yes. That's before we start on the ones who want their subs to do the housework, shopping and so on. | |||
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"What really pisses me off about Dommes is the whole 'tribute' nonsense. For those who don't know, it's where Dommes expect to be given stuff (presents and money) by their sub(s). They have silly subs then, the gift of submission is always enough "Indeed! If subs are daft enough to do it.... if it makes them happy then why not. | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems" delusion, inexperience, lack of knowledge, lack of self worth, a desire for a dominant man, a desire for a guiding hand or even companion sort of impinges on what people believe consensual though. I have seen it too many times where you sit saying - what the fuck are you doing. But they have assumed the "role as submissive" - pah. | |||
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"My sub complained (out of role) that I had not checked that she was wearing no knickers when we met and another time that I was not using the candles enough in play. Suggests to me someone wants her needs me by being a sub and in no way forced in reality against her will. No piece of meat at all or a prostitute. Actually found the idea on here fairly offensive" but that isn't what I was talking about though is it. I was talking about property, if you read it. For example: what else would you call someone that isn't seen in say 5 months as they are deemed 'property'. Offensive or not, it's how I see it. | |||
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"I can understand the rest of what your saying yes, but as a sub myself I take offence to the prostitute part
you are trying to say that power is a given to anyone that is submissive though. Which is wrong. It doesnt apply to a slave, it doesnt apply to property, or meat.
These are not titles only doms give. They are titles many women want. Some women like that worthlessness, that humiliation.
I am not calling you a prostitute, I am informing you of what I interpret the term "property" means to me."I know your not calling me a prostitute, I took offence as in a property belonging to a master/ sir it seems in your book a prostitute, if it being slave / sub, being a property of, does not make them a prostitute, both entirely different yes, but does not make them that for enjoying a fetish. | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems" There's a thin line between consensual and abusive. | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems There's a thin line between consensual and abusive." Actually that's incorrect. In a proper D/S relationship the lines are quite apparent before things move forward. For the most part, (in my experience) a true sub craves the abuse. Sometimes physical, sometimes mental. That's why it's not something to be _iewed lightly by either. | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems There's a thin line between consensual and abusive. Actually that's incorrect. In a proper D/S relationship the lines are quite apparent before things move forward. For the most part, (in my experience) a true sub craves the abuse. Sometimes physical, sometimes mental. That's why it's not something to be _iewed lightly by either." That's so full of qualification it's meaningless. | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems There's a thin line between consensual and abusive. Actually that's incorrect. In a proper D/S relationship the lines are quite apparent before things move forward. For the most part, (in my experience) a true sub craves the abuse. Sometimes physical, sometimes mental. That's why it's not something to be _iewed lightly by either." yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. | |||
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"I know your not calling me a prostitute, I took offence as in a property belonging to a master/ sir it seems in your book a prostitute, if it being slave / sub, being a property of, does not make them a prostitute, both entirely different yes, but does not make them that for enjoying a fetish." So being property = enjoy a fetish. You haven't said what that fetish is. Why have the title 'property', if it doesn't mean something different to 'a Sub' or 'a Slave'? As they both mean different things. So, what does "property" mean to you then? | |||
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"I noticed the same thing on someones profile earlier One meet and suddenly they're owned......yeah I can see it lastly all of a week "That's the bit I don't get! After one or two meets how can you own someone? | |||
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"When it comes down to it, what ever works for each couple, is down to them. As long as everything is safe sane and consensual It's when guys or women take it as a green light to really do damage and unexperienced subs/slaves will get hurt, then there's problems There's a thin line between consensual and abusive. Actually that's incorrect. In a proper D/S relationship the lines are quite apparent before things move forward. For the most part, (in my experience) a true sub craves the abuse. Sometimes physical, sometimes mental. That's why it's not something to be _iewed lightly by either. That's so full of qualification it's meaningless." So full of qualification it's meaningless... Of course... | |||
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"I noticed the same thing on someones profile earlier One meet and suddenly they're owned......yeah I can see it lastly all of a week
That's the bit I don't get! After one or two meets how can you own someone? "That's a silly statement they are saying, I don't know a timescale myself, but after one or two meets, just silly. | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead." "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol | |||
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"I know your not calling me a prostitute, I took offence as in a property belonging to a master/ sir it seems in your book a prostitute, if it being slave / sub, being a property of, does not make them a prostitute, both entirely different yes, but does not make them that for enjoying a fetish. So being property = enjoy a fetish. You haven't said what that fetish is. Why have the title 'property', if it doesn't mean something different to 'a Sub' or 'a Slave'? As they both mean different things. So, what does "property" mean to you then?" yes I can understand that too. No enjoy a fetish does not mean property, I think you know a slave has no choice in the matter ( which they enjoy) a sub has a choice to say no, the property part, say him and myself were on a meet, and this is to take place, in a way of speaking I am his property, even though not owned, I would have to do as master says do as I'm told. It does not make me needy or desperate, BDSM is a fetish enjoyed once again by both parties. | |||
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"Always safe words " and that makes it consensual ? | |||
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"Always safe words and that makes it consensual ?" I have commented above too, do you think a sub, gets tied ect and just puts up with it? | |||
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" So, what does "property" mean to you then? yes I can understand that too. No enjoy a fetish does not mean property, I think you know a slave has no choice in the matter ( which they enjoy) a sub has a choice to say no, the property part, say him and myself were on a meet, and this is to take place, in a way of speaking I am his property, even though not owned, I would have to do as master says do as I'm told. It does not make me needy or desperate, BDSM is a fetish enjoyed once again by both parties." to to pick out the property part of that. You are not owned, and you are not his sub or slave - but you have to do or be taken whenever and wherever he wants - like it or not. This isn't in the realms of free prostitution to you at all? (You go with him, wherever, do whatever without question. You never know when he is going to call on you, and apart from general safety on the meet possibly - has no responsibility to you) Sorry I offended, but - it's quite clear to me what it is. | |||
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"Always safe words and that makes it consensual ?" Yes, because it's been discussed I'm a bit lost as to your point | |||
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"Always safe words and that makes it consensual ? I have commented above too, do you think a sub, gets tied ect and just puts up with it?" that was in response to you saying "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". If one party doesn't like any one type of play, it should not be entered into. Plain and simple. That is abuse. Having a Dom/Master/Sir/Domme, doesnt mean they have unequivocal say. As you say earlier 'submissives are have power' ... so at the moment you are confusing me. Eiher you have power and say No, or you dont and give all say to the other half.
Safe words or hard limits are not an excuse to do something that isnt liked because 'they are your master' - again, this would .... abuse. | |||
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" So, what does "property" mean to you then? yes I can understand that too. No enjoy a fetish does not mean property, I think you know a slave has no choice in the matter ( which they enjoy) a sub has a choice to say no, the property part, say him and myself were on a meet, and this is to take place, in a way of speaking I am his property, even though not owned, I would have to do as master says do as I'm told. It does not make me needy or desperate, BDSM is a fetish enjoyed once again by both parties. to to pick out the property part of that. You are not owned, and you are not his sub or slave - but you have to do or be taken whenever and wherever he wants - like it or not. This isn't in the realms of free prostitution to you at all? (You go with him, wherever, do whatever without question. You never know when he is going to call on you, and apart from general safety on the meet possibly - has no responsibility to you) Sorry I offended, but - it's quite clear to me what it is." NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. | |||
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"Free prostitution !!!!! Now that's funny. Well daft actually "Ever thought about having all those books published? lol | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol "I think there seems to be confusion over abusing and abuse. If (for example) someone does not give permission to something and you tie them up and ignore that request then yes, that is abuse. | |||
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"Always safe words and that makes it consensual ? I have commented above too, do you think a sub, gets tied ect and just puts up with it? that was in response to you saying "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". If one party doesn't like any one type of play, it should not be entered into. Plain and simple. That is abuse. Having a Dom/Master/Sir/Domme, doesnt mean they have unequivocal say. As you say earlier 'submissives are have power' ... so at the moment you are confusing me. Eiher you have power and say No, or you dont and give all say to the other half.
Safe words or hard limits are not an excuse to do something that isnt liked because 'they are your master' - again, this would .... abuse. "power proberly the wrong choice of word there a right of no...however if things are discussed properly, then there wouldn't have to be a " no" making a good sub, what you are missing here, is two people have sat down and agreed to this. | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always." You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol "no lol a discussion on boundaries | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships "Can you change your profile pic for a few mins... I'm interested to read your posts, but I have to keep looking out for your knob in the avatar!!!! | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships "yes I can see that people have different opinions which I respect, you was leading almost to its a forced thing, prostitution, ect, once again an enjoyment from both parties, pleasure and pain, not abuse | |||
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"Free prostitution !!!!! Now that's funny. Well daft actually
Ever thought about having all those books published? lol"Now that really has lost me | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol
I think there seems to be confusion over abusing and abuse. If (for example) someone does not give permission to something and you tie them up and ignore that request then yes, that is abuse. "Not confused here - Luvesmuffin said "if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". If it goes ahead, and it's not liked - to me there is no difference between abusing and abuse. Either way - to assert your dominance by using your 'authority' to do something someone doesnt like. It's abuse. | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships
Can you change your profile pic for a few mins... I'm interested to read your posts, but I have to keep looking out for your knob in the avatar!!!! "lol and the thread is going all over the place | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships
Can you change your profile pic for a few mins... I'm interested to read your posts, but I have to keep looking out for your knob in the avatar!!!! "It's a fine knob though! lol | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships
Can you change your profile pic for a few mins... I'm interested to read your posts, but I have to keep looking out for your knob in the avatar!!!!
It's a fine knob though! lol "PMSL | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol
I think there seems to be confusion over abusing and abuse. If (for example) someone does not give permission to something and you tie them up and ignore that request then yes, that is abuse.
Not confused here - Luvesmuffin said "if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". If it goes ahead, and it's not liked - to me there is no difference between abusing and abuse. Either way - to assert your dominance by using your 'authority' to do something someone doesnt like. It's abuse. "stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple? | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships yes I can see that people have different opinions which I respect, you was leading almost to its a forced thing, prostitution, ect, once again an enjoyment from both parties, pleasure and pain, not abuse"I never said 'property' was an abuse. If the woman has entered into it - she knows what she is doing, she knows her position. She is there at his beck and call. I see it as a free prostitution as the guy can pick up the phone ... and as you say - take her wherever and do whatever without consequence. They are both in agreement as to expectations. But as a result, it is kind of a free type of prostitution in that respect. As she sits waiting, he does his thing and calls on when necessary. | |||
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" stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple?" again ..... I am not talking about you - I am talking in general terms!!!!! | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships yes I can see that people have different opinions which I respect, you was leading almost to its a forced thing, prostitution, ect, once again an enjoyment from both parties, pleasure and pain, not abuse
I never said 'property' was an abuse. If the woman has entered into it - she knows what she is doing, she knows her position. She is there at his beck and call. I see it as a free prostitution as the guy can pick up the phone ... and as you say - take her wherever and do whatever without consequence. They are both in agreement as to expectations. But as a result, it is kind of a free type of prostitution in that respect. As she sits waiting, he does his thing and calls on when necessary."yes in a way, if he phoned and said " get up that kitchen table now slut" what a turn on, and I would be waiting like a good slut. Anymore talk of prostitutes I won't discuss. | |||
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" stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple?" BDSM, Sub/Dom is about power exchange. One leads the other follows. It is a dance. A good dance. But you dont use that power for shits and kicks or to enforce your authority. Use Scat as an example. The dom is there saying 'you've been naughty' for whatever reason. You are there going 'fuck off you must be kidding'. The dom goes 'but I am the dom', you go 'ok do it'. It's not how it works. If you say no, it means no. Plain and simple. | |||
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" stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple? again ..... I am not talking about you - I am talking in general terms!!!!! " fair enough, and talking how a sub in general likes it! | |||
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" yes in a way, if he phoned and said " get up that kitchen table now slut" what a turn on, and I would be waiting like a good slut. Anymore talk of prostitutes I won't discuss." Muffin - I thought we had already refined lines between sub, slave and property. In this bit that you responded to.... we were talking about property not D/S | |||
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" stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple? BDSM, Sub/Dom is about power exchange. One leads the other follows. It is a dance. A good dance. But you dont use that power for shits and kicks or to enforce your authority. Use Scat as an example. The dom is there saying 'you've been naughty' for whatever reason. You are there going 'fuck off you must be kidding'. The dom goes 'but I am the dom', you go 'ok do it'. It's not how it works. If you say no, it means no. Plain and simple. " yes but if you have a good relationship and once again talk boundaries there is no need for a no...simple | |||
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"50 shades innit..... Too many people thinking they know all about bdsm cos they read a few books" | |||
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" yes in a way, if he phoned and said " get up that kitchen table now slut" what a turn on, and I would be waiting like a good slut. Anymore talk of prostitutes I won't discuss. Muffin - I thought we had already refined lines between sub, slave and property. In this bit that you responded to.... we were talking about property not D/S" yes and I have given my best knowledge to both, Masters and sirs subs and slaves will may differ with me, as we do things our own ways in different ways. | |||
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" NO! I am his sub, this is practised in the bedroom, after we may pop to the pub, or just do normal things, he does not drag me off anywhere, always mutual agreement and discussion. However when the Dom/ sub comes into it, I do as I'm told, if I didn't like something, I would tell him, and that would be the end of it, he never tries anything I don't like, mutual discussion always. You realise I wasn't talking about you specifically. I was talking in general terms ... it's a dicussion that has turned into you questioning what I think "property" is, though you wont give explanation to what it is. I didnt think we were discussing sub/dom relationships yes I can see that people have different opinions which I respect, you was leading almost to its a forced thing, prostitution, ect, once again an enjoyment from both parties, pleasure and pain, not abuse
I never said 'property' was an abuse. If the woman has entered into it - she knows what she is doing, she knows her position. She is there at his beck and call. I see it as a free prostitution as the guy can pick up the phone ... and as you say - take her wherever and do whatever without consequence. They are both in agreement as to expectations. But as a result, it is kind of a free type of prostitution in that respect. As she sits waiting, he does his thing and calls on when necessary." | |||
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"Jack shit seems to be a good response instead. You did your best but the person has a closed mind. "you talking about me here? | |||
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" stop saying its abuse!! Ok I will be plain here, I like him being dominant, turns me on, he does not hurt me abuse me, nothing there is that more simple? BDSM, Sub/Dom is about power exchange. One leads the other follows. It is a dance. A good dance. But you dont use that power for shits and kicks or to enforce your authority. Use Scat as an example. The dom is there saying 'you've been naughty' for whatever reason. You are there going 'fuck off you must be kidding'. The dom goes 'but I am the dom', you go 'ok do it'. It's not how it works. If you say no, it means no. Plain and simple. " So its a thrill to know that someone has that power over you, and a thrill to the domme that they have that power if they want to use it. But they must refrain from using it for kicks as you say. Interesting. | |||
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" So its a thrill to know that someone has that power over you, and a thrill to the domme that they have that power if they want to use it. But they must refrain from using it for kicks as you say. Interesting." Absolutely. Pushing boundaries, and being open new ideas is part and parcel of it. But simply because one likes something, there is no need to push it onto someone you are dominant to just because you can, or there is the assumption that they must. It's called respect, and by earning respect you will be able to do a lot more in the long run | |||
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"yes that is why boundaries are set beforehand, pleasure and pain, and your right never go into it lightly, small steps to start, and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead. "and if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". Ummmmmm that would be abuse then? lol
I think there seems to be confusion over abusing and abuse. If (for example) someone does not give permission to something and you tie them up and ignore that request then yes, that is abuse.
Not confused here - Luvesmuffin said "if something is not liked it must be discussed before going ahead". If it goes ahead, and it's not liked - to me there is no difference between abusing and abuse. Either way - to assert your dominance by using your 'authority' to do something someone doesnt like. It's abuse. "Bdsm is not abuse... It's something two or more consenting adults get pleasure from .. abuse does happen in relationships but that's not bdsm... If I didn't enjoy it, I'd not do it.... Cali | |||
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"Noticed quite a few profiles lately stating the person is now owned by X, Y or Z. Is this a new trend on Fab? "No Fucker owns us........ | |||
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"I have seen a few masters let their sub choose but if he say no it is no. Or a master will take it upon himself to do as he likes. I have seen this in some master/ sub relationships as some are only carried out in the bedroom ect. it's whatever floats people boats. What does my head in is when you get messaged from such people. You go too the meet expecting someone experienced as they are using all the appropriate terms. But once you lay a literal finger on them - they are very vanilla and a shit shag - or at least a shag that you weren't prepared for. Thats why I go on about dynamics so much - especially when discussing BDSM, as people dont realise there are subtle - yet extremely important differences in what they are saying and meaning. What makes them a shit shag?? A lot of things. Inexperience essentially. If I meet a woman that says she has been a sub for 2-3 yrs you expect a few things as a given. When you get an odd look at a 2" butt plug you start to realise you will be starting from scratch. I'm slightly lost, although had to have a good chuckle at your previous post. From your profile pics I'm guessing you are some sort of dom/master? Or just an owner of a very large collection of sex toys? When you say you expect a few things as a 'given'... Can you elaborate? Does meeting someone who states being sub, imply that they will be receiving a butt plug or other insertion? " Haha, good question | |||
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" Haha, good question "It's already been answered, the answer is no. There is no expectation to any play. The plug wasnt the only thing I had out but you could just tell she was inexperienced.. not only by the look but how she was generally. This is despite long chats online/at her house, and despite her saying she had had a master for x amount of years. (it's a gorgeous coloured glass plug too - cost me 25 quid lol) | |||
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"True swinging and BDSM is by consent. " | |||
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" I'm slightly lost, although had to have a good chuckle at your previous post. From your profile pics I'm guessing you are some sort of dom/master? Or just an owner of a very large collection of sex toys? When you say you expect a few things as a 'given'... Can you elaborate? Does meeting someone who states being sub, imply that they will be receiving a butt plug or other insertion? God, I didnt mean to raise this much attention. No I am not a Dom/Master - cant stand the assumed pretence (or responsibility lol). When I say you expect a few things as a given, I mean you expect a 'sub' (a sub is different to a submissive) to have had training. Training can be in a lot of things yes but restraint/plugs/clamps/whips/ropes/spanking and should be easy things to cope with or at least be familiar with or at least be an enjoyment when meeting. I am by no means generic on meets, just the one that sprang to mind as I wrote the previous, I pulled out a few toys and instead of a smile or an eagerness - I got a wft look. (It's not 2" long and not even an inch wide) " You say that you are not Dominant (Dom) but you then go on to say that certain things are expected a few things as a given which seems at odds to me, maybe you have just been with the wrong free prostitutes. Sub is an abbreviation of Submissive therefore mean the same thing. I can assure you that Nette is not owned by me or anybody else and whatever we do is always by mutual consent and for our mutual pleasure, She isn't at my beck and call at all, I'm naturally a sexually dominant person and she is naturally a sexually submissive person..ying and yang.. Wikipedia is a fine thing but it isn't an instruction manual | |||
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"I'm not sure how repeating some of your sentences is twisting but hey ho. Him" Given him a soft time, let him strutt his stuff on IC. They would eat him alive | |||
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"I'm not sure how repeating some of your sentences is twisting but hey ho. Him" Given that I have not called anybody names, just given opinion on play - yet, you are insinuating that any woman I have met have been free prostitutes is a little bit different. If you can't have an adult, grown up conversation, where peoples opinions or perspectives are taken on and discussed in a sensible way. Then I can only say the same back that your education shows. If you want to bring it down to a level of name calling then I am very adept at that. The fact that you are so insecure, even defensive about your play, automatically gives the idea that you know 1. I have a point and 2. you know that what you do is either quite weak hearted or simply childish in role or 3. excuses have to be made for it. You put the banner out there that you are sub/dom not me - yet you think hopping on a table with your knickers round your ankles ready for action when "Mr" turns up is kinky? LOL - I have vanilla friends that do that and dont consider themselves kinky! Lmao.. you literally have no idea of ownership or pushing boundaries. You have set yourselves in roles to excuse the fact you have weak sex but want it to somehow mean something. Your imagination (going from your previous posts) is lacking, which will as a result only be forwarded to play. You probably think a little candle wax, or a bit of spanking, or telling someone to hold something or hoover up while naked is 'really dominant' - again you have no idea. I Was doing things in my 20's that you could not possibly begin to contemplate and have progressed marginally since then lol. A great little tip is to roll in flour.... honestly - it'll help you like you woundn't know! (you see how easy it is to make snipes yet) ? | |||
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"The funniest ones are when they get owned one day and then disowned the other. Then owned again by another only to be disowned again. ...some of the status updates you read. Cor blimey! "It sure is entertaining I don't entertain anyone who has a list of people they own on their profile,if I thought they were half serious I might respect them a bit more but as far as I can tell its markjng territory only like a dog pissing up a lampost | |||
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"I took huge offence by the 'owned by' thing until I had it fully explained to me." Please explain coz I find it unfathomable that someone could claim to own another. Missing the point maybe ?
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"The funniest ones are when they get owned one day and then disowned the other. Then owned again by another only to be disowned again. ...some of the status updates you read. Cor blimey!
It sure is entertaining
I don't entertain anyone who has a list of people they own on their profile,if I thought they were half serious I might respect them a bit more but as far as I can tell its markjng territory only like a dog pissing up a lampost "make an observation as to their inexperience though and have LurrrvesMuffin to answer to lol  | |||
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"over the years, some of the 'owned' come across as some of the most vulnerable. but hey, their thing "or just plain desperate for romance | |||
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