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What goes wrong?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

What is it that happens with the majority of married people? Why does the good and exciting sex that they had in the beginning disappear?

I see married men and am married myself. I have some extremely good sex with these guys and so I know it's not that they are bad in bed but they just don't get what they need at home.

I know it sounds like the cliche but a couple of guys I have got to know well and its the truth rather than a line to get in my knickers and cultivate my sympathy.

In my case I think I was blinded by love for my husband in the beginning and that made the sex seem good. As the shiny newness of a relationship wears off so does the sex.

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By *reelove1969Couple  over a year ago

bristol

could it be lack of effort from both parties ...do you both still put the same effort into trying to treat each other and having special monents together ?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

in our experience it gets better between us. The kids are off hand, we have time together, we can try stuff we didn't have the opportunity to try before.

The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered.

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By *ing and RideCouple  over a year ago

stockport


"in our experience it gets better between us. The kids are off hand, we have time together, we can try stuff we didn't have the opportunity to try before.

The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered."

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By *bony in IvoryCouple  over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

Simple really, life takes over, stresses and family, work, hse work, bills etc etc ... Anyone can get good sex, providing both putting their all into it... Which is sometimes not the case "at home" .. When you play away , usually you give and get the best from each other... Then go home! No stress, no hassel job done ( so to speak! )

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Any suggestions for ten years plus of lack of excitement. Lol

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By *onnie and JohnCouple  over a year ago

WILTSHIRE


"Any suggestions for ten years plus of lack of excitement. Lol "

visit us..connie xx

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"in our experience it gets better between us. The kids are off hand, we have time together, we can try stuff we didn't have the opportunity to try before.

The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered."

this, similar to us at this time..

relationships especially with the pressures of work, kids, extended family etc need a bit extra from each other..

its hard work and without it the relationship will suffer in many area's..

finding that buzz from someone else may be easier but it may have consequences..

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By *ingjayMan  over a year ago

exeter

100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants....

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "

from a bloke, what a load of tosh..

complete drivel fella..

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "

yep you're right it must be awful to be a bloke at the mercy of these harridans who hate sex but pretend to enjoy it just to trap a man.....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "

Bitter bile

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By *bony in IvoryCouple  over a year ago

Black&White Utopia


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "
lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My sex life was never great when I was married. I tried but his idea of exciting wasn't mine. I never said no to anything he asked except bringing other people into it

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too! "

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

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By *reelove1969Couple  over a year ago

bristol

people change ...do you still look like the guy your wife married ...does she still look like the woman you married ...effort has to be put in from both parties

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Any suggestions for ten years plus of lack of excitement. Lol "

I am along these lines too. I love my husband and things are basically good between us but the sex is sadly lacking. 5 minutes tops once a week. He cums so quick I barely have time to get into it!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Any suggestions for ten years plus of lack of excitement. Lol

I am along these lines too. I love my husband and things are basically good between us but the sex is sadly lacking. 5 minutes tops once a week. He cums so quick I barely have time to get into it! "

That doesn't sound good. um no sex here though

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By *eneral HysteriaMan  over a year ago

Newcastle

... The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered.

I can't agree with this statement.

Some can try many, many times... for years, to try and inject the excitement they know existed with a wife they love.

If there's no positive response there's only so much rejection anyone can take.

This site restored my faith in women - I found out that there are women out there who do love sex and I love it too - again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"... The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered.

I can't agree with this statement.

Some can try many, many times... for years, to try and inject the excitement they know existed with a wife they love.

If there's no positive response there's only so much rejection anyone can take.

This site restored my faith in women - I found out that there are women out there who do love sex and I love it too - again."

I have to agree. I have tried suggesting things but to be fair he can't last long without anything extra added!! He would explode in seconds if it got any more exciting. It is the only part of our relationship that is lacking. He did try the doctors to see if there was a medical reason for his speed and was advised to use condoms, how romantic

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"... The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered.

I can't agree with this statement.

Some can try many, many times... for years, to try and inject the excitement they know existed with a wife they love.

If there's no positive response there's only so much rejection anyone can take.

This site restored my faith in women - I found out that there are women out there who do love sex and I love it too - again.

I have to agree. I have tried suggesting things but to be fair he can't last long without anything extra added!! He would explode in seconds if it got any more exciting. It is the only part of our relationship that is lacking. He did try the doctors to see if there was a medical reason for his speed and was advised to use condoms, how romantic "

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"...

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?"

Oh hell no!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?"

Must be fairly embarrassing for him! Usually a big reason for premature ejaculation is having sex or masturbating too frequently, not 100% on that though not really had many problems in that department myself, except a few occasions haha!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny. "

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "

Nagging is not the reason for lack of attention, hand-holding or sex or anything related to this subject. I won't elaborate as I have mentioned reasons for lack of on other threads and I already know what people will say

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!"

no he isn't. He said 100% the woman, every time.

I'm not going to justify my forum comments to you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When my wife and myself were married over 16 years ago the sex was fucking GREAT, and continued to be so for a good 2/3 years. I have never refused my wife anything in bed, (or out of it). But her and my ideas of what was acceptthat able sexualy within our marriage took different paths. I find her very sexualy attractive but she has little or no interest. We had sex a couple of weeks ago and then 12 weeks before that. For years she will only have sex in the missionary position in the bed. In the past I had suggested we shower together and soap each other down and take it from there or perhaps shag standing in front of a mirror, both suggestions were met with the response that they were perverted. She also stated that most women don't enjoy oral sex, (giving.)

Now I have no problem excepting that she does not enjoy oral sex or that the women that she has spoken to do not enjoy oral sex, but the blanket statement that most women do not enjoy oral sex? It's a very awkward situation to be in...... :-.

I mean I'm horny 24/7 and she can go without for 3 FUCKING MONTHS!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i think a lot of married couples do get bored with each other, they sometimes make excuses about their wives not wanting to do certain things but realy they just want to shag lots of different women.

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple  over a year ago

harrow

After 10 years of marriage our sex life is still as exciting and vibrant as it was in the early days.from day one we shared our fantasies then decided to fulfil them .being in the swing scene means it never get dull and haveing each others concent to play sseparately has men we have never felt the need to .maybe the feeling that the forbidden is no longer forbidden is why we dont feel the need to cheat . Im no psychologist but just a thought

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple  over a year ago

harrow

Sorry but I cant seem to spell either lol

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By *ingerbicky69Woman  over a year ago

EXETER

Oldie but a goodie. When you cheat your just cheating yourself. If your not happy or satisfied get out. Paul simon wrote a song about it....50 ways to leave your lover.

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn


"...

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?

Oh hell no!!!! "

spare the guy some dignity and just shag.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"...

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?

Oh hell no!!!!

spare the guy some dignity and just shag."

That could be said for all the people on this thread that seem to think it's ok to discuss their private lives with strangers, without their partner's knowledge.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A relationship is always a 2 way thing. Takes effort on both sides. We have been married 32 years and the sex gets better and more exciting all the time.

We communicate

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By *ohjaneCouple  over a year ago

south staffs


"After 10 years of marriage our sex life is still as exciting and vibrant as it was in the early days.from day one we shared our fantasies then decided to fulfil them .being in the swing scene means it never get dull and haveing each others concent to play sseparately has men we have never felt the need to .maybe the feeling that the forbidden is no longer forbidden is why we dont feel the need to cheat . Im no psychologist but just a thought"

In our case 35 years.

I agree. Sex, as well as everything else, will give you a return based on your input.

Communication is key, always.

Jane x

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville


"What is it that happens with the majority of married people? Why does the good and exciting sex that they had in the beginning disappear?

I see married men and am married myself. I have some extremely good sex with these guys and so I know it's not that they are bad in bed but they just don't get what they need at home.

I know it sounds like the cliche but a couple of guys I have got to know well and its the truth rather than a line to get in my knickers and cultivate my sympathy.

In my case I think I was blinded by love for my husband in the beginning and that made the sex seem good. As the shiny newness of a relationship wears off so does the sex. "

this should be moved to the counselling section

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By *atasha_DavidCouple  over a year ago

Slough


"...

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?

Oh hell no!!!!

spare the guy some dignity and just shag.

That could be said for all the people on this thread that seem to think it's ok to discuss their private lives with strangers, without their partner's knowledge.

"

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"...

is he aware that you're telling us all this information about him?

Oh hell no!!!!

spare the guy some dignity and just shag.

That could be said for all the people on this thread that seem to think it's ok to discuss their private lives with strangers, without their partner's knowledge.

"

Agreed. Do what you like but if you choose to leave your partner out of it for whatever reason leave them out of it completely.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always remember a friend who had not been married long when he found out his wife was frigid i can,t imagine how he

felt to hear that but what surprises me is is how he got that far without some idea that something was wrong perhaps the kissing and cuddling she did not mind so perhaps being old fashioned and not asking questions till after the wedding caught him out but I would like to also say what went through her mind in not saying anything till after they were married about that its hard to understand but after all the cost of the wedding it was not long over a year before they split up.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Although I don't agree with the " 100% " number on a post I get the jist of what was meant....It isn't always the mans fault if the woman doesn't want sex anymore, although they always seem to get told it must be them

SOME women don't like sex full stop, but will put up with it to get what they want, ie a wedding and babies....then it stops.

If anyone believes all women are saints and that doesn't happen I think they are being naive.

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By *cottishsexgoddessWoman  over a year ago

Glenrothes

With my ex and me, sex was never an issue, in fact it got better and better over the years. However, his parting shot to me after telling me he didn't think he wanted to be married to me any more was, "I don't find you mentally stimulating anymore." My response was "You try being mentally stimulating after 19 years marriage, two kids, working full time and running a house". He subsequently married the woman he did find mentally stimulating - funny how he tried twice in later years to get me back into bed!!! So it isn't always about sex.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"In my case I think I was blinded by love for my husband in the beginning and that made the sex seem good. As the shiny newness of a relationship wears off so does the sex. "

But isn't that were you then learn what each other likes to make sex better?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!

no he isn't. He said 100% the woman, every time.

I'm not going to justify my forum comments to you."

Write what you want it's what the forums are for, but your posts just reflect a depressed _iew .

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Although I don't agree with the " 100% " number on a post I get the jist of what was meant....It isn't always the mans fault if the woman doesn't want sex anymore, although they always seem to get told it must be them

SOME women don't like sex full stop, but will put up with it to get what they want, ie a wedding and babies....then it stops.

If anyone believes all women are saints and that doesn't happen I think they are being naive.

"

thing is Ruggers you could delete the 'wo' and it would still be the same more or less..

some guys want 'mothering' once they've been oisted out of their maternal nest and will go through the courtship, marriage ritual then expect to be looked after etc..

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"Although I don't agree with the " 100% " number on a post I get the jist of what was meant....It isn't always the mans fault if the woman doesn't want sex anymore, although they always seem to get told it must be them

SOME women don't like sex full stop, but will put up with it to get what they want, ie a wedding and babies....then it stops.

If anyone believes all women are saints and that doesn't happen I think they are being naive.

thing is Ruggers you could delete the 'wo' and it would still be the same more or less..

some guys want 'mothering' once they've been oisted out of their maternal nest and will go through the courtship, marriage ritual then expect to be looked after etc..

"

I don't think that's the same thing at all to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What is it that happens with the majority of married people? Why does the good and exciting sex that they had in the beginning disappear?

I see married men and am married myself. I have some extremely good sex with these guys and so I know it's not that they are bad in bed but they just don't get what they need at home.

I know it sounds like the cliche but a couple of guys I have got to know well and its the truth rather than a line to get in my knickers and cultivate my sympathy.

In my case I think I was blinded by love for my husband in the beginning and that made the sex seem good. As the shiny newness of a relationship wears off so does the sex. "

Not my experience, 14 years going strong.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Any suggestions for ten years plus of lack of excitement. Lol "

Send me a wink.

A beautiful woman like you should have all her desires fulfilled.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/03/14 14:56:53]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think familiarity can breed contempt. We have been married for 10 years and have 2 kids aged 4 and 6. Wifey runs her own business and i work full time. It is easy to fall into routine and not make tine for yourselves as a couple. We found we were falling into that trap and realised we were. We had a long conversation about what we thought was wrong with things and what we both needed to do to get things back on track. Things have been great since. I think relationships need to be worked at and being honest with each other makes for a better marriage....

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Although I don't agree with the " 100% " number on a post I get the jist of what was meant....It isn't always the mans fault if the woman doesn't want sex anymore, although they always seem to get told it must be them

SOME women don't like sex full stop, but will put up with it to get what they want, ie a wedding and babies....then it stops.

If anyone believes all women are saints and that doesn't happen I think they are being naive.

thing is Ruggers you could delete the 'wo' and it would still be the same more or less..

some guys want 'mothering' once they've been oisted out of their maternal nest and will go through the courtship, marriage ritual then expect to be looked after etc..

I don't think that's the same thing at all to be honest. "

how..?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!

no he isn't. He said 100% the woman, every time.

I'm not going to justify my forum comments to you.

Write what you want it's what the forums are for, but your posts just reflect a depressed _iew . "

First I've had a sense of humour by-pass and now I have a depressed point of _iew...and you accuse me of attacking other posters.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!

no he isn't. He said 100% the woman, every time.

I'm not going to justify my forum comments to you.

Write what you want it's what the forums are for, but your posts just reflect a depressed _iew .

First I've had a sense of humour by-pass and now I have a depressed point of _iew...and you accuse me of attacking other posters. "

Maybe he meant 100% of women he's come across, I dunno? Sorry I'm a bit behind on this conversation hahah

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"Although I don't agree with the " 100% " number on a post I get the jist of what was meant....It isn't always the mans fault if the woman doesn't want sex anymore, although they always seem to get told it must be them

SOME women don't like sex full stop, but will put up with it to get what they want, ie a wedding and babies....then it stops.

If anyone believes all women are saints and that doesn't happen I think they are being naive.

thing is Ruggers you could delete the 'wo' and it would still be the same more or less..

some guys want 'mothering' once they've been oisted out of their maternal nest and will go through the courtship, marriage ritual then expect to be looked after etc..

I don't think that's the same thing at all to be honest.

how..?"

Because it isn't about sex, which was what was being discussed so it looked to me like a weak comparison.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I suspect that loss of desire or very low sex drive affects men and women about equally but as with most other things to do with sex women tend not to be as vocal as men about it.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I would disagree with " equally"

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I suspect that loss of desire or very low sex drive affects men and women about equally but as with most other things to do with sex women tend not to be as vocal as men about it."

I should say women tend not to be as vocal about it in their partner as men.

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By *histler21Man  over a year ago

Ipswich


"could it be lack of effort from both parties ...do you both still put the same effort into trying to treat each other and having special monents together ? "

If both have a similar level of sex drive - only boredom can affect that. For those couples with a mismatch - one is always going to go off sex before the other. The problem occurs when the other's sex drive is still sky high.

My situation in a nutshell.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I would disagree with " equally" "

You're right I have no statistics to go on.

I have female friends who have over shared on evenings out about their husbands lack of desire

not scientific I agree.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

From my experience in breakups/ things going wrong, the two people just don't like each other anymore. Sex is the last thing on their minds if they don't even like the other person.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple  over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!"

He started off by saying its 100% the woman everytime.....you can't blame lack of sex or a failing realationship on just one person and not take any blame yourself.

Disagreeing with someone is not attacking them....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... lol sure there would be plenty of woman out there ready to give their take on this!! From their point of _iew too!

very little point against such entrenched misogyny.

The guys just expressing his _iew from HIS experience of HIS relationship . Why do you feel it necessary to attack every poster !!!!!!

no he isn't. He said 100% the woman, every time.

I'm not going to justify my forum comments to you.

Write what you want it's what the forums are for, but your posts just reflect a depressed _iew .

First I've had a sense of humour by-pass and now I have a depressed point of _iew...and you accuse me of attacking other posters. "

My opinion , I'm entitled to it .

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By *ing and RideCouple  over a year ago

stockport


"I think familiarity can breed contempt. We have been married for 10 years and have 2 kids aged 4 and 6. Wifey runs her own business and i work full time. It is easy to fall into routine and not make tine for yourselves as a couple. We found we were falling into that trap and realised we were. We had a long conversation about what we thought was wrong with things and what we both needed to do to get things back on track. Things have been great since. I think relationships need to be worked at and being honest with each other makes for a better marriage...."

So true. And I bet come October time when the kids start to go to uni and you've only got each other to think about you start to think. It can go two ways either yipeeeee lets do all the things we couldn't do before or.....shit got to sit and talk to him/her now. Bet this sites gets some new people joining that's for sure.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When my wife and myself were married over 16 years ago the sex was fucking GREAT, and continued to be so for a good 2/3 years. I have never refused my wife anything in bed, (or out of it). But her and my ideas of what was acceptthat able sexualy within our marriage took different paths. I find her very sexualy attractive but she has little or no interest. We had sex a couple of weeks ago and then 12 weeks before that. For years she will only have sex in the missionary position in the bed. In the past I had suggested we shower together and soap each other down and take it from there or perhaps shag standing in front of a mirror, both suggestions were met with the response that they were perverted. She also stated that most women don't enjoy oral sex, (giving.)

Now I have no problem excepting that she does not enjoy oral sex or that the women that she has spoken to do not enjoy oral sex, but the blanket statement that most women do not enjoy oral sex? It's a very awkward situation to be in...... :-.

I mean I'm horny 24/7 and she can go without for 3 FUCKING MONTHS! "

i love giving oral to my man

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By *nlyfun3Woman  over a year ago

NEAR Berkhamsted,Herts


"... The excitement wore off is a lame excuse for I can't be bothered.

I can't agree with this statement.

Some can try many, many times... for years, to try and inject the excitement they know existed with a wife they love.

If there's no positive response there's only so much rejection anyone can take.

This site restored my faith in women - I found out that there are women out there who do love sex and I love it too - again."

i totally understand this. I told my husband a few years ago i wouldnt ask for sex anymore as he always rejected me. I tried everything you can imagine to entice him.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think familiarity can breed contempt. We have been married for 10 years and have 2 kids aged 4 and 6. Wifey runs her own business and i work full time. It is easy to fall into routine and not make tine for yourselves as a couple. We found we were falling into that trap and realised we were. We had a long conversation about what we thought was wrong with things and what we both needed to do to get things back on track. Things have been great since. I think relationships need to be worked at and being honest with each other makes for a better marriage....

So true. And I bet come October time when the kids start to go to uni and you've only got each other to think about you start to think. It can go two ways either yipeeeee lets do all the things we couldn't do before or.....shit got to sit and talk to him/her now. Bet this sites gets some new people joining that's for sure."

unfortunately it will be awhile before the kids go to uni they are only 3 and 6

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By *ohjaneCouple  over a year ago

south staffs

Another reason a woman's sex drive could be low is The Pill.

For some women taking the pill is like throwing a switch ! Their libido just stops.

It happened to me and to a couple of my female friends. A few months after the pill was discontinued the desire came back. Sadly this is not guaranteed. Some women never quite get it back.

Moral of this story : Don't mess with your hormonal system.

Maybe if the male pill was available we would have fewer men who are "horny 24-7" ??

Just a thought.

Jane x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"100% the woman..... Everytime.... Boom they have got their man.... Why do they need to put out, why do they need to do anything but nag...... Men don't lose interest in see until the nagging starts and it becomes a big chore just to see her not nagging.... Men like their fantasies we will all hold fantasies about our wives n gas, in my experience it's usually the women that loses interest is all I'm saying, I won't even go into the in depth psychology theories, no need to jump up and defend urself ladies I'm not looking for an argument, debate or aggro just talking from experience from a males point of _iew,. I know some men will agree some won't every man on the forum will cause they wanna think they'll get in ur pants.... "

bollocks Sx

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By *ancs MinxWoman  over a year ago

Burnley


"Oldie but a goodie. When you cheat your just cheating yourself. If your not happy or satisfied get out. Paul simon wrote a song about it....50 ways to leave your lover. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The pill had no effect on my libido, but I guess everyone reacts differently.

I had a period where I didn't want sex for a couple of years (I did still do so but it certainly wasn't daily anymore!) I can't fully explain why but self-loathing played a large part. In my case it was my 'fault' if it's about blame. Mr D has always desired me.

Having come out of the other side of this blip my libido has gone up a notch. I used to think the sexual peak thing was rubbish, and maybe still do but my desire for sex has never been higher than it is now.

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple  over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

When I was married and we weren't having sex any more I asked my wife if sex was important in our relationship. When she said ' No, not really' I said 'well it doesn't matter if I get it somewhere else then'. She then said 'I take your point, so yes it is' so I said 'so why don't we have it any more?' The result was that we fucked like rabbits until we parted (for different reasons).

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