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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're fairly new to the world of swinging and recently had a small discussion with a sub-master couple.
Our initial reaction was "no"; but having thought about it we can see a certain attraction with a sub woman (or man) who is prepared to do anything her master (or mistress) wants... BUT
A question to any subs out there (either sex); we assume you have pre-agreed boundaries and would not do anything you did not enjoy, or are we being niaive?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're fairly new to the world of swinging and recently had a small discussion with a sub-master couple.
Our initial reaction was "no"; but having thought about it we can see a certain attraction with a sub woman (or man) who is prepared to do anything her master (or mistress) wants... BUT
A question to any subs out there (either sex); we assume you have pre-agreed boundaries and would not do anything you did not enjoy, or are we being niaive?
"
Not you are not being naive, imperative to have rules and boundaries in place and a safety word.
There are a lot of wannabe dom's who think if they've read 50 Shades of crap they can be one, so be careful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Masters sub here, yes we have rules n words in place if things get to much..any true domme will understand the need for this. Its all about fun for all but being safe at the same time and knowing u can stop things happening jusy by sauing that chosen word..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're fairly new to the world of swinging and recently had a small discussion with a sub-master couple.
Our initial reaction was "no"; but having thought about it we can see a certain attraction with a sub woman (or man) who is prepared to do anything her master (or mistress) wants... BUT
A question to any subs out there (either sex); we assume you have pre-agreed boundaries and would not do anything you did not enjoy, or are we being niaive?
Not you are not being naive, imperative to have rules and boundaries in place and a safety word.
There are a lot of wannabe dom's who think if they've read 50 Shades of crap they can be one, so be careful."
Also alot of wanabee sub women around at the moment who like the fantasy idea of 50 shades, but have no real idea how it works really outside of that dreadful book.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Have not read the book, so have no idea what the fuss is about. One this is for sure, I will consider sub women more carefully if there is a next time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Research research research. I use a bdsm questionnaire. Be sure of your boundaries and limits and make sure the dominant partner knows what they are doing. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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To be clear, we are not dom or sub, we'd said an outright no to a request to play with a sub and her master; but with hindsight should not have been so dismissive without understanding more.
If we were to play with such a couple, we would want to talk to both before agreeing to anything (that's no different to meeting anyone else); but we'd like to understand the other parties boundaries too
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes set the boundaries between master and sub,before even contemplating going ahead.
A lot take it that it that the master beats his sub, and she puts up with it, this is not the case.
I have come across wannabe subs and masters really is silly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes set the boundaries between master and sub,before even contemplating going ahead.
A lot take it that it that the master beats his sub, and she puts up with it, this is not the case.
I have come across wannabe subs and masters really is silly."
Well said above, Sub/Dom play isn't about beating or pain at all and sometimes play involves none of those and neither is it about taking orders and doing as told, there is a hell of a lot of trust involved and so much more too x
Certainly not something you can get into with anyone, it's meeting of minds too.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes set the boundaries between master and sub,before even contemplating going ahead.
A lot take it that it that the master beats his sub, and she puts up with it, this is not the case.
I have come across wannabe subs and masters really is silly.
Well said above, Sub/Dom play isn't about beating or pain at all and sometimes play involves none of those and neither is it about taking orders and doing as told, there is a hell of a lot of trust involved and so much more too x
Certainly not something you can get into with anyone, it's meeting of minds too.
"
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There is nothing wrong about asking questions.
Setting rules, also known as limits, and safe words are very important, but fundamental for sane Dom/sub play is respect. Mutual respect.
It is the easiest way to tell wannabe from serious person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes set the boundaries between master and sub,before even contemplating going ahead.
A lot take it that it that the master beats his sub, and she puts up with it, this is not the case.
I have come across wannabe subs and masters really is silly.Thanks well i have learnt along the way
Well said above, Sub/Dom play isn't about beating or pain at all and sometimes play involves none of those and neither is it about taking orders and doing as told, there is a hell of a lot of trust involved and so much more too x
Certainly not something you can get into with anyone, it's meeting of minds too.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes set the boundaries between master and sub,before even contemplating going ahead.
A lot take it that it that the master beats his sub, and she puts up with it, this is not the case.
I have come across wannabe subs and masters really is silly.Thanks well i have learnt along the way
Well said above, Sub/Dom play isn't about beating or pain at all and sometimes play involves none of those and neither is it about taking orders and doing as told, there is a hell of a lot of trust involved and so much more too x
Certainly not something you can get into with anyone, it's meeting of minds too.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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everything is discussed and agreed first as to expectations and limits. I for one expect pain and suffering, but that is my preference and only with a certain level of trust by both parties...and always have a safe word x |
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