FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Couples that want different things
Couples that want different things
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If one half of a couple wants a certain fantasy but the other person doesn't, how do you handle it?
Does one person 'give in'?
Do you do it with someone else?
Do you keep asking the other person in the hope they will change their mind? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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when I was married it was give and take for us, sometimes i'd do things I wasn't really into for him, sometimes he's do things he wasn't bothered about for me
except the bi thing, I've always loved bi men and it wasn't something he was going to do for me so I used to meet bi guys alone, which was fair enough |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If the relationship works then Comprimise - and if that doesnt help comprimise some more.
Sometimes trade off is worth it. "
Should read "Compromise"  of course lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We had this discusion today, things get misinterpreted at times so to save confusion I changed a few things, that way a compromise can be dealt with, not at this moment but in the future it may not be we don't play alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have fantasasies that Andy doesn't feel comfortable with trying but I'd never push him into doing something he doesn't want to do, so our compromise is I find someone who is willing instead |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Really depends on circumstances and if you don't want to as it isn't much of a turn on or don't want to as it's a turn off.
I will do things for J which don't have to give me pleasure as long as she likes it, as I get pleasure from her being happy, but won't do things I really don't like... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Really depends on circumstances and if you don't want to as it isn't much of a turn on or don't want to as it's a turn off.
I will do things for J which don't have to give me pleasure as long as she likes it, as I get pleasure from her being happy, but won't do things I really don't like... "
Very good point.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"From previous personal experience you do what is needed in a relationship & make the compromise.
Then when single again, go out and binge on what was denied during the relationship  "
I agree |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Isn't the idea of sites such as this to help people live out their fantasies.
If these fantasies are unable to be realised at home, for whatever the reason, then surely the idea is to put yourselves in a situation where they can be.  
XXXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If one half of a couple wants a certain fantasy but the other person doesn't, how do you handle it?
Does one person 'give in'?
Do you do it with someone else?
Do you keep asking the other person in the hope they will change their mind?"
It all depends on the couple and the agreement btn them i guess...so one / both may be prepared to do certain things JUST to make the other happy or if you're like myself, insist on ONLY doing things both are happy with, either way there's the potential for a dispute! |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
We play only play together so if one didn't like a fantasy then we don't do it.
I wouldn't dream of asking the OH to do something that I knew he didn't want and I know it is the same for him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Compromise isn't worth it if the other person is going to get upset. "
I agree. For example if one of you likes separate room (swap) sex and the other doesn't, how do you compromise on that ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hate the use of the word compromise in a relationship, what it really means in one gives in the other gets there way that's not compromise, sorry slightly off track there
If there is something one of wants to do and the other doesn't we simply don't do it, we aren't in this to make the other feel uncomfortable or unhappy, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate the use of the word compromise in a relationship, what it really means in one gives in the other gets there way that's not compromise, sorry slightly off track there
If there is something one of wants to do and the other doesn't we simply don't do it, we aren't in this to make the other feel uncomfortable or unhappy,"
exactly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate the use of the word compromise in a relationship, what it really means in one gives in the other gets there way that's not compromise, sorry slightly off track there
If there is something one of wants to do and the other doesn't we simply don't do it, we aren't in this to make the other feel uncomfortable or unhappy,
exactly "
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"We play only play together so if one didn't like a fantasy then we don't do it.
I wouldn't dream of asking the OH to do something that I knew he didn't want and I know it is the same for him."
Same with us...there is no point in keep pushing it if one of us has said "no,that doesnt do anything for me"
Swinging is about both of us and the others we are playing with having relaxed enjoyable fun...we have done things(sexual) that we didnt want to do for the other in the past and the fun just didnt work but we still talk about different things we would like to try |
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