FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Isn't this a swinging site??
Isn't this a swinging site??
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "Life is weird. Just block and move onto a guy who will meet you. | |||
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"Not sure Lola but at least you are being upfront about having a boyfriend,you will find the right guys to meet on here eventually." Thanks, I have had good meets with a number of lovely guys. I'm just wondering why some people have such an odd reaction to it considering the site we are on. | |||
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"Not sure Lola but at least you are being upfront about having a boyfriend,you will find the right guys to meet on here eventually. Thanks, I have had good meets with a number of lovely guys. I'm just wondering why some people have such an odd reaction to it considering the site we are on." Maybe some are scared that although you are saying your boyfriend knows all about you being here they are terrified of having fun and the boyfriend finding out(who does not know you are here,in there mind)i guess its all about trust and getting to know someone via messages and calls before some fun is arranged. The idea of your boyfriend knowing is quite hot and maybe a fantasy in its own,it has a cuckold feel to it. | |||
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"Yes very odd, I get the same thing! The whole idea is to meet people for sex! Partner or no partner" that's your idea. Other people have different ideas! | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you."  | |||
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"Some guys like to think they are the only one a woman sleeps with. They get jealous when they realise a woman is seeing other people. They just don't understand what swinging means. Just ignore them. (Some women think the same and get jealous when a guy meets other people. Very odd.)" I abhor relationship jealousy. I encourage my fb to meet other men. Why shouldn't she when I meet other women? | |||
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"Yes very odd, I get the same thing! The whole idea is to meet people for sex! Partner or no partner" LOL! I like my experiences on here drama free thank you very much. | |||
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"yes this is a swinging site ...and to answer the next question about why everyone who doesnt think like you is 'weird' or 'odd' ...how about mentioning your boyfriend on your profile and then guys who feel uncomfortable with this can choose not to contact you in the first place saving everyone time ...just an idea " | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "I know, I know it's a terrible thing people having their own preferences and then out of the blue you mention your 'new' situation and what you now offer, and suddenly you are not what they are looking for. They go weird on you..... what a kafuffle. Be strong and keep trying.... may help significantly, mentioning your 'situation' earlier in the process..... keep strong babe, amongst all those weirdo's you fine golden nuggets... keep strong, keep strong | |||
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No doubt your have a date with in the week  | |||
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"People aren't weird just because they don't behave how you think they should or fall in line with your definition of swinging. I find that quite rude and insulting." | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "I agree with what others have said above, you don't mention your partner on your profile so people who would only like to meet single people wouldn't be aware until you tell them. I also find your comment on swinging/swapping partners strange as you aren't suggesting swapping are you? Just meeting people without your partner. | |||
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"Mind you it makes a change for the " I can't get a shag because I'm not single and it must be because everyone else is weird " thread to be started by a woman. " | |||
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"Odd, I have a partner and it says this on my profile, that we don't live together and he knows I am here but doesn't want to know the gory details. I've never had anyone say it's a problem." That's because you're up front with it so anyone its a problem for can decide not to contact you. Honesty is such a valuable attribute | |||
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"Odd, I have a partner and it says this on my profile, that we don't live together and he knows I am here but doesn't want to know the gory details. I've never had anyone say it's a problem. That's because you're up front with it so anyone its a problem for can decide not to contact you. Honesty is such a valuable attribute "Good point, just noticed OPs profile doesn't mention the bf. | |||
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"People are weird on here, your right, the swinging thing is about swapping with other peoples partners and it is basically a site for meeting people to have sex with ten so why do they get so shirty about it " no one has to meet anyone they don't want to though and being called weird because you won't is the op getting shirt I think. | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone." But not if you prefer to meet genuine singles. As my previous post says I have had problems with the OH not really being ok with things (turning up d*unk, shouting, stuff getting thrown) and friends of mine (more than one) have been hit by OHs who were 'ok' with it... | |||
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"Oddest thing I have had was some guy who blocked me when I said I had started my period. Don't know what he knew about women but thought that periods was commonly understood! "Ha ha | |||
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"I prefer not to meet halves of couples (or couples) after having some very dodgy experiences caused by jealously and possesiveness. I do say so in my profile. So I'd be miffed if I was chatting to someone who then revealed that they were attached - permission does not mean all is well. One of my playmates has been dragged off the bed and punched by OHs who were ok with it! "This. Not the punching bit but preferring to not meet halves of couples. | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone. But not if you prefer to meet genuine singles. As my previous post says I have had problems with the OH not really being ok with things (turning up d*unk, shouting, stuff getting thrown) and friends of mine (more than one) have been hit by OHs who were 'ok' with it... "Same here! A lesson quickly learned. | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone." And that is your absolute right just like anyone who does have a problem with it has a right to feel that way. All this getting annoyed because people reject you for what is basically keeping information quiet until some way down the line is a bit of a waste of energy that could be used to amend a profile to include a short sentence saying they have a partner who knows what they're up to. Or is that a silly idea? | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone. And that is your absolute right just like anyone who does have a problem with it has a right to feel that way. All this getting annoyed because people reject you for what is basically keeping information quiet until some way down the line is a bit of a waste of energy that could be used to amend a profile to include a short sentence saying they have a partner who knows what they're up to. Or is that a silly idea?" Pffft, far too logical. You should know this by now | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone." We thought so to and for over a year it was fine however recently the OH based on a conversation with one of our friends decided in a flash to move the goal posts. We have no idea where this was heading but we immediately backed away severing all contact to avoid any possibility of the behaviour mentioned above. A very sad but salutary lesson for us as we will now only consider totally single guys and will certainly avoid any long term friendships. | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "Its just some peoples choice many will assume that with a singles profile you are single and if they find out differently they see it as a trust issue. I am sure there are plenty of other guys who would be happy to meet you. | |||
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"Yes very odd, I get the same thing! The whole idea is to meet people for sex! Partner or no partner that's your idea. Other people have different ideas!"I see no reason why there should be some sort of one dimensional approach just because it's a 'swinging' site there's no rule book for what people have to want out of it. If people feel uncomfortable about aspects of a potential meeting that is entirely their prerogative!
My profile changes almost weekly to fit the mood I am in at that point in time as my play preferences change.
The same with meets - there are certain scenarios that wouldn't appeal to me (married women playing behind the husband's back is one) . We are all at liberty to decline situations in which we do not wish to involve ourselves | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you." This ^^^^^^^^ | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "We don't meet one half of a couple either, wether the couple have agreed to it or not...so we must be weird too | |||
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"Yes very odd, I get the same thing! The whole idea is to meet people for sex! Partner or no partner" Thats your idea, it isn't compulsory for everyone | |||
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"I dont believe in cheating on someone so i would have to make sure its ok with the significate other." | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird???
We don't meet one half of a couple either, wether the couple have agreed to it or not...so we must be weird too "very very happy to be considered wierd here, thanks | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you." Maybe its not on her profile because its not an issue for them...she has NO obligation to inform strangers of her private life...if you want to know...simply ask!
Some people forget that individuals have needs that not one person alone can satisfy...  | |||
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"I don't see having a knowing partner as a problem. if the partner is fine with it, seems a win win for everyone. And that is your absolute right just like anyone who does have a problem with it has a right to feel that way. All this getting annoyed because people reject you for what is basically keeping information quiet until some way down the line is a bit of a waste of energy that could be used to amend a profile to include a short sentence saying they have a partner who knows what they're up to. Or is that a silly idea? Pffft, far too logical. You should know this by now "so so blindingly logical | |||
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"Oddest thing I have had was some guy who blocked me when I said I had started my period. Don't know what he knew about women but thought that periods was commonly understood! "Oh that was so funny! Blocked for being on a period. | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you." Fair point... will amend the profile so its not such a terrible shock for you poor boys hee hee  | |||
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"Oddest thing I have had was some guy who blocked me when I said I had started my period. Don't know what he knew about women but thought that periods was commonly understood! "Vegans are weird like that. | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you. Fair point... will amend the profile so its not such a terrible shock for you poor boys hee hee "Not up to you to amend, just do what you want to do with whoever wants to do it with you. Sometimes I have partners, female or Tgirl etc, sometimes I don't. People getting all moralistic on here do give me a giggle, it's all basically about people having fun fucking and related activities | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you. Fair point... will amend the profile so its not such a terrible shock for you poor boys hee hee "You really don't get it, do you? | |||
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"Your profile makes no mention of having a boyfriend, let alone him being aware of this (at least at the time i've just read it). So that would be a bit of a red flag for me if you suddenly produced that information mid message chat. Maybe that's why they go quiet on you. Fair point... will amend the profile so its not such a terrible shock for you poor boys hee hee
You really don't get it, do you?"Glad someone else spotted it. I'm off to sleep. No more constructive advice from me. | |||
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"I forgot how riled up people can get about the smallest of things on these threads. I'm not saying that anyone who won't meet a half of a couple is weird I was merely saying the situation is weird when they just stop messaging back, they can politely say they don't meet one half of a couple. If I'm not interested I try to reply to say thanks for their message but I'm not interested. Plus I don't lead guys on I mention it in the first couple of messages so I don't waste anyone's time. Will amend the profile so all those who bother to read it before they message will be aware of my relationship status Plus I wasn't complaining about a lack of meets I was just confused by the reaction of some. Sheesh you lot "Sod it Lola, just have fun and ignore the moralists | |||
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"I forgot how riled up people can get about the smallest of things on these threads. I'm not saying that anyone who won't meet a half of a couple is weird I was merely saying the situation is weird when they just stop messaging back, they can politely say they don't meet one half of a couple. If I'm not interested I try to reply to say thanks for their message but I'm not interested. Plus I don't lead guys on I mention it in the first couple of messages so I don't waste anyone's time. Will amend the profile so all those who bother to read it before they message will be aware of my relationship status Plus I wasn't complaining about a lack of meets I was just confused by the reaction of some. Sheesh you lot
Sod it Lola, just have fun and ignore the moralists " | |||
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"I forgot how riled up people can get about the smallest of things on these threads. I'm not saying that anyone who won't meet a half of a couple is weird I was merely saying the situation is weird when they just stop messaging back, they can politely say they don't meet one half of a couple. If I'm not interested I try to reply to say thanks for their message but I'm not interested. Plus I don't lead guys on I mention it in the first couple of messages so I don't waste anyone's time. Will amend the profile so all those who bother to read it before they message will be aware of my relationship status Plus I wasn't complaining about a lack of meets I was just confused by the reaction of some. Sheesh you lot
Sod it Lola, just have fun and ignore the moralists
"It has nothing to do with moralism, but everything with giving the relevant information so people can make an informed decision. Simples. | |||
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"I forgot how riled up people can get about the smallest of things on these threads. I'm not saying that anyone who won't meet a half of a couple is weird I was merely saying the situation is weird when they just stop messaging back, they can politely say they don't meet one half of a couple. If I'm not interested I try to reply to say thanks for their message but I'm not interested. Plus I don't lead guys on I mention it in the first couple of messages so I don't waste anyone's time. Will amend the profile so all those who bother to read it before they message will be aware of my relationship status Plus I wasn't complaining about a lack of meets I was just confused by the reaction of some. Sheesh you lot
Sod it Lola, just have fun and ignore the moralists
It has nothing to do with moralism, but everything with giving the relevant information so people can make an informed decision. Simples."Decision to be made? Do I like the sound and look of this person? Couple of mails and a phone call, do I want to fuck them? Meet, are they as they seemed to be, fuck them or not? Simples. | |||
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"I forgot how riled up people can get about the smallest of things on these threads. I'm not saying that anyone who won't meet a half of a couple is weird I was merely saying the situation is weird when they just stop messaging back, they can politely say they don't meet one half of a couple. If I'm not interested I try to reply to say thanks for their message but I'm not interested. Plus I don't lead guys on I mention it in the first couple of messages so I don't waste anyone's time. Will amend the profile so all those who bother to read it before they message will be aware of my relationship status Plus I wasn't complaining about a lack of meets I was just confused by the reaction of some. Sheesh you lot
Sod it Lola, just have fun and ignore the moralists
It has nothing to do with moralism, but everything with giving the relevant information so people can make an informed decision. Simples.
Decision to be made? Do I like the sound and look of this person? Couple of mails and a phone call, do I want to fuck them? Meet, are they as they seemed to be, fuck them or not? Simples."and dont forget to lock the door on the cave when you get home afterwards.... | |||
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"I find it odd that when chatting to guys and I let them know I have a boyfriend; but he is well aware I am on the site as he is too and we both play but not as a couple; they suddenly stop chatting. Once I even got a message saying that they wouldn't ever meet with someone who has a partner. But surely the very early connotations of swinging was the swapping of partners at a party... keys in a bowl type scenario. Why are people so weird??? "Think that means both partners play together and swap. No mention of bf on profile so not giving true facts to those messaging either | |||
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" Not up to you to amend, just do what you want to do with whoever wants to do it with you. Sometimes I have partners, female or Tgirl etc, sometimes I don't. People getting all moralistic on here do give me a giggle, it's all basically about people having fun fucking and related activities "so your opinion is the benchmark of all swingers? Only in your own little world! | |||
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" Not up to you to amend, just do what you want to do with whoever wants to do it with you. Sometimes I have partners, female or Tgirl etc, sometimes I don't. People getting all moralistic on here do give me a giggle, it's all basically about people having fun fucking and related activities
so your opinion is the benchmark of all swingers? Only in your own little world!"Oh no, a born again Christian swinger | |||
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