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a question for the true singles

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly.

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I am too fixed in my ways to change for anyone, that is why I am single and very happy to remain so.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

if I met someone I liked then yes id give up swinging for them. ..

and I have. x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Single and extremely happy being so, wouldn't get into another relationship if you paid me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Id be happy with a fuck buddy

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not looking but if it happened and it was serious I'd give this up straight away

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Although not single now I was when I met my wife and also actively swinging.

So in answer to the op it really depends on how sexual a person you are. For me leading up to meeting my wife I ended a number of relationships due being incompatible sexually. For those that are going to say this is shallow I truly believe that if you feel something's missing at the start of a relationship it's only going to become more apparent overtime no matter what that maybe.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


" I ended a number of relationships due being incompatible sexually. For those that are going to say this is shallow I truly believe that if you feel something's missing at the start of a relationship it's only going to become more apparent overtime no matter what that maybe.

"

agreed, exactly how i was, i dont think its shallow, although at times I questioned myself over whether it was, but i guess thats because I felt like I was asking for too much.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/09/13 10:31:39]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Im single and not looking for a relationship right now. But if I did meet someone, I would like it if they were open to swinging. Though I would want to concentrate on the relationship first and foremost it would be something I would love to share with someone special.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Im single as a pringle. The only thing i want at the moment is a flirty mingle.

..but, if that moment came. Then, you'd have to do what makes the relationship work. I am a romantic at heart you see, just with a really dirty mind lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ive been married ( and divorced ) three times ! Even a hint of another relationship gets me running for the hills. If foolishly I did meet someone again then yes without a shadow of a doubt I would have to carry on with this life - its too good to let go ! Lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tried to give it up for a non swinger. Was great for about 6 month. Then the call of the wild got the better of me. So we split up so I could go back to swinging.

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By *edangel_2013Woman  over a year ago

southend

I couldn't give it up. The lifestyle is too ingrained in me as a person. My 2 best friends are swingers, and yes, that's how we met, that alone would be too much for some men to understand. 80% of my FaceBook friends are swingers, some I've played with, others I haven't.

Add to the fact that I am bi, and that puts even more men off, as much as it is every mans fantasy (apparently) to watch 2 women together, when one is your partner, is scares a lot of men off.

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By *exiSlutBabeWoman  over a year ago

Stoke

Single yes, play on my own yes, but I am not looking for a partner so cannot answer that question

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By *eareenaCouple  over a year ago

Rockford

Honestly. .. no idea. I know love has made me make huge sacrifices in The past (I moved to England from Texas) and now that my kids are nearly grown I feel pretty selfish. If that superman did come along... and I very much doubt he will. I probably would make sacrifices again.

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By *yLittleMushroomIndeedMan  over a year ago

Lowestoft

when i was in my first ever relationship last year i gave up the swinging life totally for her, my choice of course and she knew i was a swinger as i told her that i was, but now im single again and i want to swing i cant get anything

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Id give it up not sure i want to be swinging when im 70 which if i reach it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Id give it up not sure i want to be swinging when im 70 which if i reach it "
would be great sorry just had a grey moment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

1/ Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in?

A/NO NOT AT ALL.

2/ if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

A/I WOULD ACCEPT THEM AND FORGET SWINGING IF WE GOT SERIOUS.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I joined fab because I am single. As soon as I meet a guy in the real world I will leave fab.

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By *uckyinlustMan  over a year ago

manchester

I'm single and love it ................

I think that sex is THE most important part of ANY relationship

Great sex is the bond of any relationship...........................and swinging is just an extention of that bond

I could not live in a relationship that doesn't have that special sexual bond

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I tried giving up the lifestyle a couple of years ago for one guy but he was too jealous and possessive (probably because he knew about my past!) and also wasn't willing to fulfil the only thing I asked of him - to shag me lots.

We split, and I have since decided that, if someone needs me to change myself for him, he's not the one for me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I tried giving up the lifestyle a couple of years ago for one guy but he was too jealous and possessive (probably because he knew about my past!) and also wasn't willing to fulfil the only thing I asked of him - to shag me lots.

We split, and I have since decided that, if someone needs me to change myself for him, he's not the one for me."

This is so TRUE irrespective of whether swinging is involved or not x

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By *entaur_UKMan  over a year ago

Cannock

I am single, and if i met a non swinger, started a relationship with her and she wanted me to give it up, i would give it up if i loved her.

Would'nt the best solution be to find a partner who is already into the swinging lifestyle, so then you could swing together as a couple?

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By *r Mahogany70Man  over a year ago

Leicester

I don't class myself as a swinger as my understanding is swinging involves couples exchanging partners or playing together with others whether they be couples, singles or multiples

I prefer 1-on-1 meets so if I were to find myself a partner and we were sexually compatible I would not expect, want or need her to swing with me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'll come back to this after work.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Interesting responses , thanks guys.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

been single 4 year now (full yime single dad) and if I found right person id give this up for a future

this just abit of fun because I can

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No idea at all. it is not the sort of thing to drop in on the first date is it.

I have talk to her about it, if she wanted to go exclusive. Before that or before I was will to bring it up then no I would not stop. Swinging is part of who I am. Would not sleep with her with her know about it.

Would I stop if she asked me to, love can be a funny thing. So no dam idea.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I would give up multiple people for sex if I did meet someone who made me happy, emotionally and sexually. However, they would have to accept that this has been part of my life.

That has been the bit I have found difficult to achieve. So many men get caught up on "the numbers" and the past, through their own insecurities.

Plus, they have to be able to keep up with my libido.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

given the chance i would fade into a normal life and give this up in a heartbeat

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I were in relationship 27yrs x single since march,not interested in relationship,if in future decided to then they have to accept who i am,thats not likely to happen ?t mo,im enjoying my fb's with no hassles,no dramas my own space

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would definitely give it up if the right girl was to come along and she had no interest in it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They would have to accept me for who I am...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"given the chance i would fade into a normal life and give this up in a heartbeat "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I notice it's mostly the guys that would give us the lifestyle lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would give it up if he ticked all the box's

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

thing is

i would give it up if i was 110% happy fullfilled with someone

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By *razy-CplCouple  over a year ago

and surrounding areas

I met Mr Crazy in a different swing site , so it works for us now but i dont think i could have met a guy outside the scene as i enjoy it too much , the variety it brigs ,the different sexual people that you meet , the mmf , ffm , mfmf , couldnt really get that with a partner outside swing , so for me the answer would be no i wouldnt meet a guy who wasnt into this like i am

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never tried it with someone I'm dating, think I would definitely still want to play, but maybe toned down a bit on including other people kinks, and up the sub/dom, voyeur, fantasy kinks.

Found that when I have dated, chemistry and kinks are part of what I'd need/want as my sex drive is far too high, and this has contributed to things ending in the past.

That said, its much nicer and easier without the emotional or external baggage, when both people are single, get on and are just enjoying themselves.

I also cant imagine bringing it up with a potential new BF

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I joined fab because I am single. As soon as I meet a guy in the real world I will leave fab. "

Me too x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

And me I am looking for love

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I joined fab because I am single. As soon as I meet a guy in the real world I will leave fab.

Me too x"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not looking for a relationship, but I wouldn't rule one out. I would however prefer that to be with someone who was into/interested in the scene as I do enjoy swinging. I agree with an above post that I'd want to take a bit of time out at first as we got to know each other but really not sure I could give this lifestyle up now, especially as I'm loving exploring my bi-side

I know it's not quite the same, but I did meet some couples with a FB and I enjoyed watching him play too...it was a real turn on and it's something I've like to do again (my current FB and I are considering dipping our toes!). Can only imagine it being even more intense with a 'real' partner

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By *ark Gr8 Teddy BearMan  over a year ago

Wigan


"both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly."

if they weren't interested and didn't want me to carry on I would call it a day. I think I'd want to give a long term relationship a chance as I'd have sex on tap anyway and if it did end I could always come back to swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would give up swinging

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"And me I am looking for love "

See I am not. I would never have a full on relationship again.. so it's not an issue for me.. but if somehow it happened, I'd expect any man that loved me to accept me for who I am. Monogamous I am not.. faithful and loyal I am.

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly."

Someone answered a similar question on another thread thus: single = promiscuous; couple = monogamous. Sums up my point of _iew.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Would be happy to give it up for right person. Not even sure being a single guy can be classed as swinging.

So, would only be giving up the potential for multiple partners.

Bit like people in the "vanilla world" getting hitched.

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"I don't class myself as a swinger as my understanding is swinging involves couples exchanging partners or playing together with others whether they be couples, singles or multiples

I prefer 1-on-1 meets so if I were to find myself a partner and we were sexually compatible I would not expect, want or need her to swing with me"

Exactly how I feel

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I Joinned single and only meet 1-1, though I'm not looking for a relationship at present, if I ever do, I would give it up for the right man. Happy single for now.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd give up swinging but could not give up fetish.

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By *U1966Man  over a year ago

Devon

Depends on the person you meet have enjoyed lots of fun but would be able to live without swinging

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'd give up swinging but could not give up fetish."

This goes for me too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I Joinned single and only meet 1-1, though I'm not looking for a relationship at present, if I ever do, I would give it up for the right man. Happy single for now. "

I wonder if it's the people that enjoy group stuff that are more into the accept me as I am. Funny thing is I no longer play at all without my play partner, and we are just friends that have coupled up..but I just have no interest in playing without him there too.. but can not envisage a time I would only ever touch one person only. X (says the person that has only touched one person the last two playtimes lol.)

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By *ancs MinxWoman  over a year ago

Burnley


"Im single and not looking for a relationship right now. But if I did meet someone, I would like it if they were open to swinging. Though I would want to concentrate on the relationship first and foremost it would be something I would love to share with someone special. "

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By *uby0000Woman  over a year ago

hertfordshire

what if you could give it up if you met someone but they really couldn't leave

would it still work?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was swinging before I met my ex (aka KNOB!) when having a FFM. There was no swinging in our relationship, pure vanilla, and it never bothered me. We were together 5 years, so I could happily give it up if I met someone or would equally be happy to swing with a new partner if it was something they were in to or interested in!

x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have only experienced swinging briefly but I took to it like a duck to water. I would love to experience it with my future loved one but due to the complexities in relationships due to our own personal characters and that of our partners, I couldn't begin to say I definitely would.

However what I would need at the barest minimum is much role-play with swinging scenarios. The mind is our greatest erotic organ and I would want to use it to the full.

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By *adcowWoman  over a year ago

kirkcaldy

single for 8 yr now do miss the everyday stuff, the cuddles , someone to chat to about your day (sometimes the dog just doesn't put up with it).

if i met a vanilla not sure how it would go, would take time out so i could concentrate on our relationship then probably broach the subject of swinging see the reaction and take it from there.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly."

Big if but if I found the right man I wouldn't be able to bear him touching anyone else and I wouldn't want either. I'm waiting for the day I feel like that again

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't class myself as a swinger as my understanding is swinging involves couples exchanging partners or playing together with others whether they be couples, singles or multiples

I prefer 1-on-1 meets so if I were to find myself a partner and we were sexually compatible I would not expect, want or need her to swing with me"

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By *ocketrocket80Man  over a year ago

Walsall


"I would give it up if he ticked all the box's "

Off to find the boxes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"And me I am looking for love

See I am not. I would never have a full on relationship again.. so it's not an issue for me.. but if somehow it happened, I'd expect any man that loved me to accept me for who I am. Monogamous I am not.. faithful and loyal I am. "

This!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm single. .. I love it when couples want to share each other with me... but I'm not sure I would want to share someone I was in love with......

I will happily move on to an exclusive relationship at some point I hope!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Single ish for two years, swung with GF before that and wife before that, so on and off have been 'at it' for about 15 years (I don't count the early dogging years as swinging) but even so I can picture a monogamous relationship and with hindsight my relationship with the ex should have been that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not looking but if it happened and it was serious I'd give this up straight away"

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By *eryBigGirlWoman  over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Honestly. I don't know but I think they'd have to be something extremely special to tie me down to one guy

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think if the right person came along, and its a BIG if,,,then I probably would.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"if I met someone I liked then yes id give up swinging for them. .. "

same

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly."

I met someone over a year ago and consciously gave up the fab adventure. I was straight with her from the start and she initially was cool if not intrigued by it. Transpired there were certain trust issues, that combined with my job resulted in the relationship breaking down, whether it was sour grapes or genuine disdain, we parted on bad terms with her telling me what I did before we met was disgusting! I am a firm believer in honesty being the best policy, but would be very cautious/wary about telling someone that is not Swing au fait what I got up to.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't class myself as a swinger as my understanding is swinging involves couples exchanging partners or playing together with others whether they be couples, singles or multiples

I prefer 1-on-1 meets so if I were to find myself a partner and we were sexually compatible I would not expect, want or need her to swing with me

"

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By *ariad.Woman  over a year ago

north wales

[Removed by poster at 19/09/13 02:04:02]

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By *ariad.Woman  over a year ago

north wales

If I met someone and fell for them I'd give it up in a heartbeat, but for now im single and ready to mingle.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When are you dating and when are you looking for meets? Do you do both in equal measure?

I always wonder...

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By *ickFitzintiteMan  over a year ago

Portchester

Tricky one, you should respect each others likes, however asking someone to allow you to see other people is a big ask. Maybe your feelings would be more suited to andwer this question, afterall if you love someone i dont think you would think about anyone else

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Tricky one, you should respect each others likes, however asking someone to allow you to see other people is a big ask. Maybe your feelings would be more suited to andwer this question, afterall if you love someone i dont think you would think about anyone else"

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By *hrisBlkGuyMan  over a year ago

Birmingham

[Removed by poster at 19/09/13 04:46:19]

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By *hrisBlkGuyMan  over a year ago

Birmingham


"both male and females who are genuinely single and either actively swing or want to.

Would a new potential partner have to be willing to accept your adventurous sexual side and be prepared to join in? if they didnt, would that rule them out as a potential partner, or would you accept that and still embark on a relationship and forget swinging?

Just asking because i was single by choice for a long time, i think i filtered alot of potential partners out because i knew there was no point getting involved because id get bored quickly."

I'm not currently looking for a partner as i enjoy meeting for casual sex and swinging, but if i did decide to have a new partner, and i don't mean a fuckbuddy, i would give up swinging and the casual sex straight away.

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"I'd give up swinging but could not give up fetish."

Nor I!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would give it up for a relationship, i would also encourage meeting together if he suggested it.

Ideally, i would like to swing in a loving relationship, but relationship would have to be well established, secure and both 100% for swing before venturing into.

X

Any takers?

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"I Joinned single and only meet 1-1, though I'm not looking for a relationship at present, if I ever do, I would give it up for the right man. Happy single for now.

I wonder if it's the people that enjoy group stuff that are more into the accept me as I am. Funny thing is I no longer play at all without my play partner, and we are just friends that have coupled up..but I just have no interest in playing without him there too.. but can not envisage a time I would only ever touch one person only. X (says the person that has only touched one person the last two playtimes lol.)

"

I think you maybe right. I only play one on one and I'm straight. Until the age of 45 I'd only slept with one man: my husband. If we hadn't divorced I'd probably never have slept with another man. Being monogamous isn't a problem for me.

However, if I were bi, enjoyed group sex, the club scene it would be pointless embarking on a relationship where my sexual needs were repressed: it wouldn't stand a chance of surviving.

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"what if you could give it up if you met someone but they really couldn't leave

would it still work?"

Not for me.

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By *ancingtartWoman  over a year ago

Newcastle

Im naturally sexual and promiscious, if i god forbid ever had another long term relationship they would have to either participate or turn a blind eye...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't want a relationship. Too complicated. I end up changing for the man into someone I don't like and it always ends badly.

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By *ohohoWoman  over a year ago

Up North


"I would give up multiple people for sex if I did meet someone who made me happy, emotionally and sexually. However, they would have to accept that this has been part of my life.

That has been the bit I have found difficult to achieve. So many men get caught up on "the numbers" and the past, through their own insecurities.

Plus, they have to be able to keep up with my libido.

"

This has proved a sticking point for me. How do you tell a potential partner about your past? I am a terrible lier and would have to tell. Also I demand and need lots of good sex. Maybe it would be easier to date another person involved in this lifestyle?

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By *razy-CplCouple  over a year ago

and surrounding areas


"I would give up multiple people for sex if I did meet someone who made me happy, emotionally and sexually. However, they would have to accept that this has been part of my life.

That has been the bit I have found difficult to achieve. So many men get caught up on "the numbers" and the past, through their own insecurities.

Plus, they have to be able to keep up with my libido.

This has proved a sticking point for me. How do you tell a potential partner about your past? I am a terrible lier and would have to tell. Also I demand and need lots of good sex. Maybe it would be easier to date another person involved in this lifestyle? "

Thats what we have done

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When are you dating and when are you looking for meets? Do you do both in equal measure?

I always wonder..."

I really can't b bothered to date. I don't date ever really. If I meet someone has to be organically

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