FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Please explain to me....
Please explain to me....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Will somebody please explain something to me...
For clarity and honesty, I state on my profile that I'm in a partnership and that I have full permission from my partner to be on here and play when I want. That's all - no suggestion that my partner wants any involvement or is available...
But because my partner is another women, I get endless messages from men who get turned on by it and feel that they can comment on it in some provocative way!
Even worse, some take it for granted that she's available to join in!!!
Look - let me make it clear - it's a lesbian relationship - woman to woman - and men don't figure in it - no way, not at all....
If I need the attention of boys on the side with no strings, then that's all that I want, and nothing more is on offer!!!
What on earth is it that turns some men on about two women together - (that's two women without men!)????
Please explain - I'm beginning to feel very dumb in not understanding... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
They're chancing their arm. There are a few men still around who consider women only exist for their pleasure, and when they find out you are in a relationship with another women they must think all their Christmases have arrived at once. This then drains all the blood from their thinking apparatus and they type something offensive.
Take it as a handy filter to out the morons and move on. |
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Sorry, but it's just one of those things I'm afraid. Myself and the vast majority of men are turned on by the thought of two women together, whether simply watching or, even better, joining in.
As for men contacting you and asking for your partner to join in? Those are the minority numpties who don't respect boundaries or wishes. You just have deal and ignore because they won't go away. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"They're chancing their arm. There are a few men still around who consider women only exist for their pleasure, and when they find out you are in a relationship with another women they must think all their Christmases have arrived at once. This then drains all the blood from their thinking apparatus and they type something offensive.
Take it as a handy filter to out the morons and move on."
So true.... and yes, it's a great self-filtering process; I must have the longest Block list on here.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They're chancing their arm. There are a few men still around who consider women only exist for their pleasure, and when they find out you are in a relationship with another women they must think all their Christmases have arrived at once. This then drains all the blood from their thinking apparatus and they type something offensive.
Take it as a handy filter to out the morons and move on.
So true.... and yes, it's a great self-filtering process; I must have the longest Block list on here.... " maybe some people don't read ur profile fully or speed read it . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry."
... thought it was just me |
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"I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry."
While not that extreme, i'm in a similar vein. I'd rather watch an MF couple over an FF couple. Mainly because i can relate to the former.
To the OP, as a few have already explained so well, seeing two women together sexually is a big fantasy for a lot of guys. Couple that with some of the behavious exhibited on this (and other) sites and you have your situation. The block button comes extremely recommended. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Who's Brian?
What a different movie "The life of Brian" would have been lol."
I quite like Brian from "New Tricks" - now there's an interesting character...! (What a loss!!!) I'd say yes if he asked, just because he's interesting - though fortunately the delightful Esther manages to keep him in check,,,,, |
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The thing is people just don't read profiles - we were messaged by a couple and I replied saying thanks for the interest but I don't think we're the couple for you as you're both straight and won't meet smokers. They messaged back and low and behold they were now both bi-curious and would meet smokers - go figure lol xx |
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May I suggest that you take control and be the one contacting those men you fancy. The disadvantage is that you will probably face the 'blocked/deleted' button, however the first message gives you the opportunity to clearly state what your situation is and that your partner is off limits. |
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"I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry."
You aren't alone though A finds it tedious too, he'd much rather join in |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe amend your profile a little, is it necessary to express you're in a relationship with another woman?
It'll distract from this issue is my thinking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Another factor common to all cyber communications is that many users feel able to make comment / show less regard / be rude or invasive because they don't have to deal with a reaction from the person.
If nothing else it's a scary sign of the thoughts going on in the head of people you would think perfect normal and gentle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry.
... thought it was just me "
We are the same, I would probably watch for about 30 seconds and then get bored. |
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There cock sends their fingers a message to type rather than engaging their brain first. Many men believe in the 'well you might change your mind' or 'god love a tryer' (I don't) or 'I thought I would take a chance, you never know' arghhhh. Basically they read a profile and they make the words into sentences they want to hear. For example your profile says 'I'm not interested in men only women' said men read this as
1* I'm a sex starved lady into ladies, I must be in need of your small cock!
2* Wow hanks for messaging me, I wasn't into men until you messaged me, wowwwwwwwww what a fine hunk of a man you are, here catch my knickers.
3* I'm into ladies, I must be missing out. You are just the one to pop my cherry.
4* god loves a trier, said lady maybe very religious, if I mention a god she might just give me one.
5* I'm on a swingers site so I want to fuck anyone and everyone, male or female. Form an orderly queue at my door. I have no personal preferences.
6* This profile is written by someone who doesn't know what they want, I'll convince them they want me. By several actions.
a) I message them anyway.
b) they reply no thanks, said initial messenger gets uppity.
c) demands to know 'why not'
d) You're not what I'm looking for.
e) Why not, I'm a stud, I can make you cum, I can make you swuirt, I'm Superman, I won't cum till you do, I will give you time of your life, I will be best man you've had (even though you're not into men) blah, blah.
Then after about 10 messages the messenger says 'fuck off anyway you're old/fat/ugly/think you're a model..........blah, blah, blah. Then BLOCK lol
The above definitions aren't my own, just typical examples of how thick people read profiles and read it as they want to percieve it. |
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Annievixen.........that post wasn't aimed at you, btw. x Just an example of how idiots don't read. Sadly I get it with couples too. They 'assume' I'm bi, I'm not, been there, done that, not for me. But they still think I want to meet as a FFm and do bi. It's like going into Tesco for a few bits and getting to the till and someone saying 'you don't want that nice tasty, crusty, seed topped bread. you want this cheap, crappy, heavy white loaf instead. I know you will like it, you won't regret it! arghhhhhhhh
But you would regret it, because it's not what you wanted. Personal choice is just that, sadly a LOT of people assume it's pickyness. If we wanted to fuck just anyone we could becoe a drug addicted prostitute who will do anything for a fiver.
Not that I'm getting at people who are escorts etc, it's a job like any other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe amend your profile a little, is it necessary to express you're in a relationship with another woman?
It'll distract from this issue is my thinking. "
If it was me I wouldn't mention my partner or at least not their sex. It's no-one else's business. When I do have a profile it has barely any information about me. Even my profile pic is about 3 years out of date. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think im in the minority. I dont like 2 women together well not on their own dont mind playing with 2 at same time but in reality watching 2 women perform is like watching paint dry.
... thought it was just me "
thank fook im not alone.
would ratehr be watching the missus with another guy than with another woman.
nothing to see with a face buried in a critch, whereas watching a cock slide in oand out of her mouth is...mmmmmmmmm |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Annie you're on a swingers site where guys talk about sex 24/7. Everyone is gagging for it, you're a woman that is in a same sex relationship and have revealing photos on your profile, do you think guys aren't gonna be interested in that side of it? We can't explain our own mindset but yes the majority of guys like the idea of girl on girl, it's not a crime nor is it disgusting or anything, same way us guys can't explain what you find sexy or enjoy.
You see a lot of these type of posts and snotty profile these days getting tore into guys on here, like all the men are pure deviants. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well don't tell them your relationship is with a woman. It's nobodies business but your own. All they need to know is that you're with someone else but playing with them. As you've said nobody factors into it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers."
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid"
No it isn't, it's an option the OP can take if she so wishes to distract this kind of attention is all. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid"
seriously 'most single guys'
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid"
Thank you - I sometimes feel that honesty isn't all that valued on here...
Why shouldn't I say that I'm in a partnership with another women? It defined who I am, and explains why I only want certain things from a man.... My needs are simple really.
Besides, I might also be open to the occasional women, and I'd want her to understand my background.
Honestly, I didn't want to know what everyones fantasy is, or who likes to watch what - or not....
I just wanted to know why so many guys (not all by any means) can't see past the opening lines without having to message me with their crude assumptions. Are they really incapable of seeing what's there and writing intelligently if they are still interested, or else just passing on by....?
Yes, I've met some very nice men on here - intelligent, well mannered and good company - but I just don't understand why some of the rest just seem to have no control at all over their thoughts, surely they can't really be that obsessed? Can they? I just want to understand why....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
"
not telling people who your in a relationship with isn't not being honest
On here I tell people on a need to know basis, if they don't need to know it I don't tell them
If men pestering her to meet her partner too is pissing her off so much just say your in a relationship but not who with, they don't need to know that, or keep telling them and keep getting pissed off, simple really |
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid
seriously 'most single guys'
"
I think 'most' might be an exaggeration but I've just done a search of single guys for the london area and out of the first five three can't accommodate so the numbers suggest at least half aren't actually single.
NB that I am allowing for 1:10 having a genuine reason. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid
seriously 'most single guys'
I think 'most' might be an exaggeration but I've just done a search of single guys for the london area and out of the first five three can't accommodate so the numbers suggest at least half aren't actually single.
NB that I am allowing for 1:10 having a genuine reason. "
not sure of the London area but property price is high, they maybe share accom but I do agree there will a good few fibbing.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
not telling people who your in a relationship with isn't not being honest
On here I tell people on a need to know basis, if they don't need to know it I don't tell them
If men pestering her to meet her partner too is pissing her off so much just say your in a relationship but not who with, they don't need to know that, or keep telling them and keep getting pissed off, simple really"
I think some people just like the attention and act all pissed off so they get more attention.
Men like women on women. Who knew? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid"
Read my post. I said consider removing it. I did not tell her to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider removing any statements about your partners gender. It's nobody else's business but yours and hers.
why should op?
she is being honest, which is a lot more than most 'single' men are on here.
her relationship defines her as a person, as does everyone elses, so to tell her not to have it on her profile is just allowing morons free reign to remain stupid
seriously 'most single guys'
"
i didnt say 'most single guys' i said most 'SINGLE' guys, the emphasis being on the single rather than the entire quote.
questioning the fact they are single. |
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