FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Thank you but no thankyou
Thank you but no thankyou
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By *oxy jWoman 15 hours ago
somerset |
entitalment is not attractive .. no one owes you or anyone else anything ..
for me if im not interested then its a str8 block that way i dont get anymore abuse of course those im interested in will get a reply even if its rare as most i find no attraction with 99.99% of the time |
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By *ooLou89Woman 15 hours ago
Nottinghamshire |
"entitalment is not attractive .. no one owes you or anyone else anything ..
for me if im not interested then its a str8 block that way i dont get anymore abuse of course those im interested in will get a reply even if its rare as most i find no attraction with 99.99% of the time"
Exactly this. The entitlement, and inability to accept polite rejection without following up with abuse, with or without a reply it still happens 🙃😂 |
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"Because no one owes anyone a reply 🙄
This 👌🏼 and from what I know most females would have to do so 100 times a day 🤦🏼♀️"
And life is too short to do the above.
Take the L and move on, can’t be everyone’s type |
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By *elloWoman 15 hours ago
alpha centauri |
"Why is it so difficult for people to respond saying this ! Some are so aggressive ! Anyone else finding this ?"
If the person asked you to message them and then ignored you, then yeah that's rude.
However, if you've decided to 'cold call' the profile with a message and they ignore you then that is fine. (What's a message equivalent of a cold call ? Junk mail? Or is that just for post. Oh is it just spam! Yes I think it's spam)
Yes ignoring a spam message is considered by most to be socially acceptable, there's no way I'm replying to all those takeaway establishments that shove their info through my slot
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"Why is it so difficult for people to respond saying this ! Some are so aggressive ! Anyone else finding this ?"
Too many nasty replies for when we reply nicely. So we tend not to rely just delete. |
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"Why don’t ladies just delete instead of reading and not replying…. Never understood this  "
I do this. And regularly get a snotty one back. Three today. I don't block single males for the forums, but can't win with messages,
polite reply. Still get hassled. Say no thanks or delete. Get called all sorts. |
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"Why don’t ladies just delete instead of reading and not replying…. Never understood this
I do this. And regularly get a snotty one back. Three today. I don't block single males for the forums, but can't win with messages,
polite reply. Still get hassled. Say no thanks or delete. Get called all sorts. "
I can understand why get so many texts, but why ladies open texts and not reply.. if not interested delete or block .. |
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I've said no thankyou and get people calling me names or asking for explanations. It's an implied no if you don't get a response, and that is a complete answer. I can't believe the entitlement of people getting the arse about not getting a reply to an unsolicited message. It's nice of people to raise their red flag for me though and confirm that I was right not to reply |
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Quite right, OP. These foul and fetid women, leading us nescient men into a merry dance and a quick-step along the boulevard of false hope and futile expectations. We write them heartfelt missives, romantic letters and lustful poems and they give us the silent treatment without a second thought.
The wenches. |
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By *elloWoman 15 hours ago
alpha centauri |
Do men send a message and then monitor their sent messages to see if the message has been opened and ignored/deleted/left unread /left on read?
That can be good for your mental health, send a message and either ignore your sent messages or delete your sent messages.
if you get a reply, yay that's great. If you don't get a reply , you might not remember who you sent the message to anyway so who cares |
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That's my point
I do delete them.
Which should be quite clear I'm not interested.
But I then either get follow up messages or get called (heres a recent list after deleting- rat, stuck up cunt, and ugly slag) |
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By *ooLou89Woman 14 hours ago
Nottinghamshire |
"Do men send a message and then monitor their sent messages to see if the message has been opened and ignored/deleted/left unread /left on read?
That can be good for your mental health, send a message and either ignore your sent messages or delete your sent messages.
if you get a reply, yay that's great. If you don't get a reply , you might not remember who you sent the message to anyway so who cares"
I wonder this too.. coz some be sooooo quick to hurl abuse after thier message is deleted too, like was you sat watching and waiting sir?? 😅🙈 |
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"Why don’t ladies just delete instead of reading and not replying…. Never understood this
I do this. And regularly get a snotty one back. Three today. I don't block single males for the forums, but can't win with messages,
polite reply. Still get hassled. Say no thanks or delete. Get called all sorts.
I can understand why get so many texts, but why ladies open texts and not reply.. if not interested delete or block .. "
How are we supposed to know if we're interested if we don't open messages? |
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"Do men send a message and then monitor their sent messages to see if the message has been opened and ignored/deleted/left unread /left on read?
That can be good for your mental health, send a message and either ignore your sent messages or delete your sent messages.
if you get a reply, yay that's great. If you don't get a reply , you might not remember who you sent the message to anyway so who cares
I wonder this too.. coz some be sooooo quick to hurl abuse after thier message is deleted too, like was you sat watching and waiting sir?? 😅🙈"
But then we are all painted with the same brush.. sorry for this on behalf of these clowns .. x |
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People should be respectful and this includes whether or not there's interest
Report abusive people OP.
And acquaint yourself with the rule no reply = no thanks. It might include a block to prevent time wasting when not matched |
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No reply is a reply. If you have a problem with that, it's your problem. You don't know how many messages some people get. You don't know the abuse you'll often get for replying "no thanks". If you don't get a reply, get over it. |
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By *end1Man 14 hours ago
southend on sea |
In my opinion all this could be stopped if fab had a way of let's say a guy who messages a profile can only send a second once he has had a reply back therefore indicating that the other party is interested! It would cutout abuse from the rejected person etc. |
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By *ooLou89Woman 14 hours ago
Nottinghamshire |
"Do men send a message and then monitor their sent messages to see if the message has been opened and ignored/deleted/left unread /left on read?
That can be good for your mental health, send a message and either ignore your sent messages or delete your sent messages.
if you get a reply, yay that's great. If you don't get a reply , you might not remember who you sent the message to anyway so who cares
I wonder this too.. coz some be sooooo quick to hurl abuse after thier message is deleted too, like was you sat watching and waiting sir?? 😅🙈
But then we are all painted with the same brush.. sorry for this on behalf of these clowns .. x"
Well I don’t think anyone is saying it’s all of you. But it’s a vast majority. And the point is, no one is owed anything here from anyone. Allow people to mange thier messages as they see fit. Delete, left on read, whatever they wish without being moaned at or receiving abuse.. let’s be mature about it 🤷🏼♀️ |
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By *r TriomanMan 13 hours ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
This my take on it OP; when I get fliers through my letter box offering all types of products / services, I don't message each and every one saying "thanks but no thanks, I just ignore them and, guess what? They never complain that I'm rude or ignorant.
Why should Fab be any different? Fire and forget; send your message and then delete it, don't track it, don't send loads more, don't complain in the forums, just move on. |
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By *uzzleMan 13 hours ago
Hastings |
I know women get inundated with messages but I don't think a 'no thank you' to messages is warranted.
Contary to what seems to have become Fab 'law', a no response to a message isn't a response!
I think if women were to respond with a no thank you, some wouldn't take no for an answer, they'd consider that 'contact' and continue messaging etc.
I think the easiest way to deal with this issue is to simply have a disclaimer on your profile, along the lines of:
"If you send a message which I don't respond to or delete, its simply because you're not what I'm looking for".
I don't think anything more is needed and this is a very succinct way of dealing with the issue. |
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https://m.fabswingers.com/articles/FAQ#noreply
Its often just not worth the hassle it ends up in to reply, we mostly do, but at times, especially if had message of someone multiples times, then we don't.
But like the FAQ says,
It's not rude not to reply.
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"Why is it so difficult for people to respond saying this ! Some are so aggressive ! Anyone else finding this ?"
Why is it so difficult for people to actually read someone's profile and respect that they don't want you to message them unless you meet the requirements on their profile?
Also, do you reply to every letter or spam email that gets sent to you saying "Thank you but no thank you" ? The answer is no you don't, because they don't appeal to you.
A complete stranger thinking that they're owed a reply from a person, or that the person should perform an action, such as deleting the mail, because it's the outcome that you desire is a major red flag and a worrying mindset. |
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Usually a "thanks but no thanks" isn't viewed that way.
It seem a reply means a level of interest, so a dozen more messages arrive, and it all gets out of hand.
If it's on a day with an over abundance of messages already, it becomes a problem.
For us it's....ignore, then delete a day or two after |
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It’s not about manners, it’s about people reading our profile.
We state we don’t reply to blank/bland profiles and profiles with cock pics/action shots and yet people fitting the above still message us. People out of our age range message as they believe they will be the exception.
So they are instantly deleted. We are here for fun - not wasting time on messages of people who don’t read profiles.
As the rules say, no reply is a reply.
K
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By *eyeYCouple 6 hours ago
Nr Leicester |
"It’s not about manners, it’s about people reading our profile.
We state we don’t reply to blank/bland profiles and profiles with cock pics/action shots and yet people fitting the above still message us. People out of our age range message as they believe they will be the exception.
So they are instantly deleted. We are here for fun - not wasting time on messages of people who don’t read profiles.
As the rules say, no reply is a reply.
K
"
Absolutely! The "Hi xx" messages with a crap bio a close up picture of his cock or her boobs..
Just bloody tiring, did respond ages ago mirroring the same effort but now straight delete.
Occasionally have that 'might have found them attractive thought' but.. |
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Yeah no one owes you a reply we literally put on our profile please take no reply as a polite no.
Yet we still get people sending 5 unanswered messages I admit sometimes I will reply with something like 'yes we weren't interested after 4 messages but the 5th has totally changed our minds' 🤣 |
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Entirely depends on the type of message that has been received before it.
If it was a polite, well worded message from someone who has taken the time to read our profile first then they will get a polite answer back.
One word/one liners/rude/unsolicited dick pics/messages that act as though it's only Mr or Mrs that exists will get a response back in line with what was received, or not at all. Same with those who do not take a polite no for an answer. |
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"I'd rather get no reply than have my time wasted with a "no thanks". Why do sensitive men on here get so upset that women don't apologise profusely for not wanting them? Sad!"
Why would a no thanks reply be wasting your time?
They're telling you they will not waste your time. |
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By *issmorganWoman 26 minutes ago
Calderdale innit |
Because some women get loads of messages and don't have time to reply with no ta, to them all.
Also a no thanks can lead to abuse or more questions like why not, what's wrong with me etc.
Just delete any messages you send from your outbox and any replies will be a nice suprise. |
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By *issmorganWoman 25 minutes ago
Calderdale innit |
""Sorry, you aren't what we are looking for"
Response "what are you looking for then?"
"Not you, take the hint". Also not interested in you telling us you 'can be' what we want..."
Or thanks but no thanks
Then :why not, what's wrong with me?. |
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