FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Observation not a moan!!
Observation not a moan!!
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 jeeze that’s not good ratios from their perspective ….. not suggesting you at all.
Have you found that more of the people since COVID that contact you are dreamers and wannabes?
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"I have only joined since COVID and it's always been a nightmare! I thought this would function like any other dating site/app really but it doesn't at all, I think most are on here for shits and giggles or to get their egos boosted in many cases" I think most resign themselves to shits and giggles when they realise how shit it is as a dating site, especially for single guys. But like you, I wasn't here in the earlier "golden era". | |||
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"One thought but is it a victim of it's own success? As the sites popularity has increased has there been a growth in single male members, many of whom are not house trained, or at least, act like a kid in a sweet shop upon first joining. This then turns people off single men in general so it gets harder to meet people? Do couples share this view that it's changed and are they too finding it hard to meet?" I agree, the site popularity is not helping. It's oversaturated with single men, most of who believe all women on here (including those in couples) are free-for-all and would drop everything to have a sex chat or meet. However, I don't think there is one singular reason for the change on Fab. Another few reasons I could think of: 1) the influx of "content creators", people who are not really interested in normal, offline meets, but are on here to either just share the content, or who use their profile on here to generate traffic to their other sites 2) people who never had any intention of meeting and are here just for camming/chats- those have always been around, but in my opinion, Covid has normalised online interaction, including one of sexual nature, and therefore more people just want that. 3) due to too many fantasists and dreamers with no intention of meeting, a lot of Fabbers who actually do want to meet others choose to do it in swingers clubs. It's also part of supporting the clubs after the pandemic. 4) Covid has changed how many risks people are prepared to take, I guess. Meeting new people carries risks, it has been drilled into us that anyone can carry a "deadly infection", and we regularly get headlines in papers that there are "viruses around that could lead to another lockdown" and similar bullshit. So some people choose to just stick to online interaction, whereas others prefer to be exposed to more than one "potentially deadly virus" at a swingers clubs  . But even there, it seems like the socialising has taken over and there isn't that much sex happening.
Or maybe the main reason is, we forgot how to interact with people? | |||
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"One thought but is it a victim of it's own success? As the sites popularity has increased has there been a growth in single male members, many of whom are not house trained, or at least, act like a kid in a sweet shop upon first joining. This then turns people off single men in general so it gets harder to meet people? Do couples share this view that it's changed and are they too finding it hard to meet? I agree, the site popularity is not helping. It's oversaturated with single men, most of who believe all women on here (including those in couples) are free-for-all and would drop everything to have a sex chat or meet. However, I don't think there is one singular reason for the change on Fab. Another few reasons I could think of: 1) the influx of "content creators", people who are not really interested in normal, offline meets, but are on here to either just share the content, or who use their profile on here to generate traffic to their other sites 2) people who never had any intention of meeting and are here just for camming/chats- those have always been around, but in my opinion, Covid has normalised online interaction, including one of sexual nature, and therefore more people just want that. 3) due to too many fantasists and dreamers with no intention of meeting, a lot of Fabbers who actually do want to meet others choose to do it in swingers clubs. It's also part of supporting the clubs after the pandemic. 4) Covid has changed how many risks people are prepared to take, I guess. Meeting new people carries risks, it has been drilled into us that anyone can carry a "deadly infection", and we regularly get headlines in papers that there are "viruses around that could lead to another lockdown" and similar bullshit. So some people choose to just stick to online interaction, whereas others prefer to be exposed to more than one "potentially deadly virus" at a swingers clubs . But even there, it seems like the socialising has taken over and there isn't that much sex happening.
Or maybe the main reason is, we forgot how to interact with people? "Was going to write a response to this but this exactly what we see has happened. Clubs are thriving and people are more comfortable meeting at a club rather than their home. Instead of being disappointed by a let down, you still get to go and have fun at a club rather than at home. Apps have moved on too and Fab isn't the only source for swinging now. Like mentioned, with Twitter, OF and FS, there's alot that aren't swingers but content creators that congest the site too | |||
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"Yeah, I’m considering going that down that road and just meeting at clubs/parties But I prefer the interaction of 1-1 meets and regular meets if possible. So, club meets don’t really scratch the itch to be fair. Two meets!! jeeze that’s not good ratios from their perspective ….. not suggesting you at all.
Have you found that more of the people since COVID that contact you are dreamers and wannabes?
X"Not even dreamers, more just absolutely fucking rude and disgusting. Selfish, entitled, and view me as a fleshlight that just happens to be attached to a person, if they even remember that I'm a person at all. And then of course nobody seems to be honest about what they want. When I want NSA, they lie and say they want that too, and then confess they want a gf. When I want a regular arrangement, fwb or similar, they lie and say they want that too, then we fuck and you don't see them for dust. When I want to date, they try to string me along with breadcrumbing behaviour, because they actually want a fwb. Essentially, no matter what I'm looking for, the men who want it too don't ask me for it at the time.... only ones who want something different and want to manipulate me in to giving them what they want instead. It's baffling. | |||
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"I find yr observation spot on… plus attitudes have changed, there’s more people just been critical and sounding off… it’s gone very cliquey.. less meets more self righteous … " I genuinely think it has gone less cliquey - it used to be a nightmare in the olden days. | |||
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"I (mrs) think lockdown had a big part in ether the lack of social skills or the loss of manners. We're getting more and more opening messages that don't introduce themselves and the opening line is I'm in your area how about a car meet or I need emptying " That’s so true in yr opening three lines… I find that in life outside fab, the social skills of a lot of ppl now are very lacking and has for manners, well, someone must of left the window open and they all escaped… thank goodness there are still ppl around like ourselves… polite with manners .. | |||
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"I (mrs) think lockdown had a big part in ether the lack of social skills or the loss of manners. We're getting more and more opening messages that don't introduce themselves and the opening line is I'm in your area how about a car meet or I need emptying " Your right with that, some of my friends say how rude and insistent people are and then can't take rejection. It's certainly a generation thing and it's makes it harder for the nice gentleman on here | |||
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" Not even dreamers, more just absolutely fucking rude and disgusting. Selfish, entitled, and view me as a fleshlight that just happens to be attached to a person, if they even remember that I'm a person at all. And then of course nobody seems to be honest about what they want. " A lot of these sentiments (especially the one above) seem to address the next entitled generation spot on. Maybe people are picking up those behaviors and mimicking them. | |||
Age is a big player despite what we tell ourselves | |||
"Age is a definite factor despite what people say, to keep their consciences clear and a lot are guilty of it, it is not just a number. My ex used to say beyond 50 it is a rapid downhill slope.... lets be honest most here now are just looking for a knot-hole to stick their cock and shoot their load, don't want to date you, take you to, dinner, meet their mates or parents
Age is a big player despite what we tell ourselves"I AM looking for men in the early to mid 50s range. And I still get spoken to like the knot-hole seekers, as you so fabulously described them . So they can't all blame it on their age! | |||
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"Yeah, I’m considering going that down that road and just meeting at clubs/parties But I prefer the interaction of 1-1 meets and regular meets if possible. So, club meets don’t really scratch the itch to be fair. Two meets!! jeeze that’s not good ratios from their perspective ….. not suggesting you at all.
Have you found that more of the people since COVID that contact you are dreamers and wannabes?
X
Not even dreamers, more just absolutely fucking rude and disgusting. Selfish, entitled, and view me as a fleshlight that just happens to be attached to a person, if they even remember that I'm a person at all.
And then of course nobody seems to be honest about what they want.
When I want NSA, they lie and say they want that too, and then confess they want a gf.
When I want a regular arrangement, fwb or similar, they lie and say they want that too, then we fuck and you don't see them for dust.
When I want to date, they try to string me along with breadcrumbing behaviour, because they actually want a fwb.
Essentially, no matter what I'm looking for, the men who want it too don't ask me for it at the time.... only ones who want something different and want to manipulate me in to giving them what they want instead. It's baffling. "I’m sorry that you’ve hand met some shit guys on here that have given you the run around. I can only assure you that we are not all like that. Hoping that you manage to find someone that restores put faith in the male community on here  | |||
"Also OP, we dont know who you're replying to. Use the reply + quote button so that we can tell 🙂" Oh yeah…. Durrrr I was being a bit dim there Wonder why me responses weren’t showing up lol X | |||
"I've experienced similar. When I first joined (2018), I could have three meets in a week if I wanted to, and put the effort in for it. Now I've met two men off here in the past two years. TWO. And both of those actually wanted traditional mono relationships, which is just... mindblowing considering my profile. So now I stick to people I meet at clubs and organised/group socials, it's just easier. 🤷🏻♀️" | |||
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"There seem to be more desperate men since Covid, and more men in general. Basically, a larger pool of men made worse by many who don't really understand how the site works. Getting older won't help though OP." Yeah, I have been told by others that the influx of men, particularly ones that don’t come across as very pleasant isn’t helping things That’s is certainly true….. May be time to get my pipe and slippers out lol X | |||
"Maybe it’s more related to age. You are 4-5 years older and beyond the 50 mark which so many seem to set as their cut off? " I’m 59 -I’m not dead is what I always say to this comment 😀 | |||
"Before I start this post I want to emphasise that this is a genuine observation and (definitely not a moan before I get berated by people wanting to have a dig/troll) to something that I’ve pondered for a while, now. I’ve been on Fab for just over 15 years and I’ve noticed a change in Fab since Covid but can’t finger on what it is, or even several things. This observation/query regards meets…. Or lack of. Before COVID it was quite common for me to have a meet a 2-3 times a month and to be engaging with people on Fab quite regularly. However, over the last couple of years I’ve noticed a significant decline in this…… in fact its been about a year since the last time I had a meet off Fab, that may or may not have led to something/further meets (apart from party meets, of which I’ve had several). Nothing has changed my end…. Always send a nice non-vulgar, engaging message, try to link it to their profile if I can, always send clear face pics etc etc Occasionally I get a response and engage…. Which might die off for lack of interest their end, I presume?? Obviously, I’ve got a bit older so that may be a factor …… but then so has everybody else lol. Anyway, the question is….. what has changed since COVID? Or has it? Have any other long standing Fabbsters experienced the same? I’ve spoken to a few people that are long term Fabbsters that have said the same…… but what is it??? Remember this is not a moan and I’m not bleating as I do alright off Fab, just curious Thanks for any insightful responses and discussion. If you want to troll etc then troll on else where…. To long in the tooth to engage with that shizzle lol X" I'd agree, been on a long time as well and find so many fake accounts on here nowadays. Lots seem to just want the likes on pictures as well and many seem to be there one minute and gone the next. | |||
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"its really simple as to whats change since covid the rush of zillions of men joining the site add in that alot of couples and women left or no longer meet via fab so you have 100s of men trying for the same woman or couples.. also the lack of ''swingers'' alot are not here to swing anymore alot of swingers have gone back underground private parties some have gone back to dogging because its easier and dont have to reject men all day or put up with abuse .. im only here for guys but in truth i dont need them as ive a black book full of numbers.. and what i feel was another mistake for fab was allowing videos as all thats done is attracted more wankers" Yeah, that’s a good point ref the videos ….. as you said I guess many people are here for the titilation of being on a ‘swinging’ | |||
"Before I start this post I want to emphasise that this is a genuine observation and (definitely not a moan before I get berated by people wanting to have a dig/troll) to something that I’ve pondered for a while, now. I’ve been on Fab for just over 15 years and I’ve noticed a change in Fab since Covid but can’t finger on what it is, or even several things. This observation/query regards meets…. Or lack of. Before COVID it was quite common for me to have a meet a 2-3 times a month and to be engaging with people on Fab quite regularly. However, over the last couple of years I’ve noticed a significant decline in this…… in fact its been about a year since the last time I had a meet off Fab, that may or may not have led to something/further meets (apart from party meets, of which I’ve had several). Nothing has changed my end…. Always send a nice non-vulgar, engaging message, try to link it to their profile if I can, always send clear face pics etc etc Occasionally I get a response and engage…. Which might die off for lack of interest their end, I presume?? Obviously, I’ve got a bit older so that may be a factor …… but then so has everybody else lol. Anyway, the question is….. what has changed since COVID? Or has it? Have any other long standing Fabbsters experienced the same? I’ve spoken to a few people that are long term Fabbsters that have said the same…… but what is it??? Remember this is not a moan and I’m not bleating as I do alright off Fab, just curious Thanks for any insightful responses and discussion. If you want to troll etc then troll on else where…. To long in the tooth to engage with that shizzle lol X I'd agree, been on a long time as well and find so many fake accounts on here nowadays. Lots seem to just want the likes on pictures as well and many seem to be there one minute and gone the next. " Yeah, I’ve experienced the same many times | |||
"Maybe it’s more related to age. You are 4-5 years older and beyond the 50 mark which so many seem to set as their cut off? I’m 59 -I’m not dead is what I always say to this comment 😀" | |||
