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By *eyeY OP Couple 2 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
We are not talking about infidelity to be clear!!
Wondering after chats with others about how brutally open you are with your partner, there are always times of being diplomatic to prevent upset, but.
Do you share your unredacted fantasies, whether you want something different either for the new experience or they're doing something you don't like?
Examples..
I (Y) had always had a r@#e fantasy. Messaged D who was walking the dog at the time to enter the house and he would be treated as an intruder.
He was to do anything necessary to fuck me and only cease if either of our safe word's were used. (fucking hot! Had a few bruises that needed excuses, but I ticked it off and have not wanted it again) 🔥
He bluntly told me a while ago that if I was trying to give him a hand job dry it was akin to him sticking his fingers in me dry and before I was ready.. Which I totally understand now 🤷
So do you hold back or are you candid? Examples welcome 😘 |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 2 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
Entirely, my example was something I had never told previous partners (including my ex husband) as I didn't feel I'd be accepted enough for it 🤷 D isn't naturally that 'kind of guy' but gave me exactly what I asked for.
I was a little taken a back, although he explained he thought many guys would "suffer in silence", as guy's may tend to be grateful for what they get and women remain (through no fault of their own) ignorant to the fact. |
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By (user no longer on site) 2 weeks ago
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It depends on the partner as to what I've shared but the inability to be completely honest, the unwillingness to discuss the past, is very much a red flag and would likely be a dead breaker in any future relationship. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 2 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"It depends on the partner as to what I've shared but the inability to be completely honest, the unwillingness to discuss the past, is very much a red flag and would likely be a dead breaker in any future relationship."
Yes, but in a lot of case's things evolve.
We both had previous marriages where we both felt unable, D initiated a different/difficult conversation after being together 3 months (5 years now) regards sexual experience and desires and we've continued since.
Don't always get it right and we've had speed bumps along the way.. |
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By *eyeY OP Couple 2 weeks ago
Nr Leicester |
"Yes always totally honest with each other as even if that brings some heartache at least things can be understood and sorted out rather that building up any kind of resentment."
👍 Still sometimes difficult to do isn't it. We argue, said things in the moment.
But it's 'framing' things in a constructive manner (we're equally guilty of being blunt as hell sometimes) and seeking/being prepared to understand 😘 |
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"Yes always totally honest with each other as even if that brings some heartache at least things can be understood and sorted out rather that building up any kind of resentment.
👍 Still sometimes difficult to do isn't it. We argue, said things in the moment.
But it's 'framing' things in a constructive manner (we're equally guilty of being blunt as hell sometimes) and seeking/being prepared to understand 😘"
It can be difficult but doing the difficult stuff makes life easier. |
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By (user no longer on site) 2 weeks ago
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"It depends on the partner as to what I've shared but the inability to be completely honest, the unwillingness to discuss the past, is very much a red flag and would likely be a dead breaker in any future relationship.
Yes, but in a lot of case's things evolve.
We both had previous marriages where we both felt unable, D initiated a different/difficult conversation after being together 3 months (5 years now) regards sexual experience and desires and we've continued since.
Don't always get it right and we've had speed bumps along the way.."
I've always been open but I've also learned to read the room. Some people just can't handle things the same as others so it means that total and abject honesty would be detrimental to tge relationship. As such, a decision must be made as to how open you want to be and whether a lack of total clarity constitutes a compromise too far or not. |
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We’ve been together 17 years now and find complete honesty is the best way forward and help stops bigger problems in the future. It took a while to build upto that level but our sex life & relationship is so much better because of it. We’ve agreed to some scenarios purely to please the other and tick it off the list or simply met in the middle if one was too much for the other |
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By *J75Man 2 weeks ago
Stoke on Trent |
"honesty and up front is always best, but can occasionally be hard to be honest."
Since me and the wife agreed to split, I've been nothing but honest (as she has with me) I've told her I've joined fab, and I've got a couple of meets in the pipeline, also told my friends I'm on here, it feels really good to be so open and honest |
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