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Friends ask to join - accept the invite?
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On New Years Eve I was asked by my mate (since kids) if I’d join them. Told him I thought he was joking. She came over, we were at a house party, and said it was a fantasy they both had. They thought about a stranger but agreed no and agreed to ask me.
I said no, they are normal friends and don’t want it to ruin our friendship. Ask when sober.
They have.
She’s very attractive so tempted.
Worth the risk? |
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How long have you known these friends, and if it all went south how upset would you be if you didn't speak again? If you are comfortable with the idea if it does go south and everyone falls out, but you got to fuck her.
I'd balance it out with temptation vs friendship.
We had fun a couple of years ago with her best friend. I find the friend very attractive so naturally was not going to say no. Thankfully as they've known each other neck end of 20 years it wasn't "awkward" after and put down as a one time thing, done it, tick it off, don't talk about it sort of deal.
Hope it works out for you if you do decide to go for it. |
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By *ony MannMan 3 days ago
Las Gaviotos, Fuerteventura |
"On New Years Eve I was asked by my mate (since kids) if I’d join them. Told him I thought he was joking. She came over, we were at a house party, and said it was a fantasy they both had. They thought about a stranger but agreed no and agreed to ask me.
I said no, they are normal friends and don’t want it to ruin our friendship. Ask when sober.
They have.
She’s very attractive so tempted.
Worth the risk?"
Very wise to ask for the question to be reputable when sober. Now ho for it. |
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Thanks, reading my mind.
Him, 30 years or so. I’d say good mates.
Her, 5 years. His second wife.
He just called and he said he’d probably watch and that it’s a shared fantasy. She said in background not to worry. Reckon some hot wife been watched in their house…..
How do I know it’s not just her idea? Got to call them back.
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"Thanks, reading my mind.
Him, 30 years or so. I’d say good mates.
Her, 5 years. His second wife.
He just called and he said he’d probably watch and that it’s a shared fantasy. She said in background not to worry. Reckon some hot wife been watched in their house…..
How do I know it’s not just her idea? Got to call them back.
"
If you're interacting with a couple you have to assume that they've discussed and agreed it all. You can usually get a feel for if one partner is reluctant. |
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By *ibLeiMan 3 days ago
Manchester |
Firstly, it was nice of you not to make any decision while they weren’t sober. It shows you have principles and truly care about this friendship  .
As for exploring this opportunity, an important question is whether you three can separate the sexual aspect of a potential encounter from the friendship. If you decided to stop having these encounters, do you think it would impact the friendship? If you three think the answer is no, I’d say this looks quite positive : )
I would also ask them if they’ve ever done that before. |
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"I didn’t get the feeling he was against. She just seems more enthusiastic."
If you use the quote button under the post you're replying to we will know who you're answering  .
If you have reservations don't go ahead. The genie is out of the lamp now though, they've asked, refusing or accepting could bring issues. |
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"I didn’t get the feeling he was against. She just seems more enthusiastic.
If you use the quote button under the post you're replying to we will know who you're answering .
If you have reservations don't go ahead. The genie is out of the lamp now though, they've asked, refusing or accepting could bring issues. "
Top tip. Some sage advice on messages.
Steer clear with a thanks but no thanks.
Bah |
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Sex changes things... You can never really know how until you try but you run the risk of ruining a friendship.
No idea how much you've spoken about this, or they have spoken about it as a couple from your post but I'd start here if you haven't. Lots of separate open and honest conversations with time in between to process which you hear.
When my ex and I were talking about swinging it took months from the first conversation to taking the first baby step (a trip to a swingers club where we agreed not to swing at all, not even soft. Just chat to others and get frisky together if it felt right). If they haven't had those conversations as a couple then I'd leave them to do that first.
I presume you mate is the man of the relationship and I can tell you that the first time he sees his wife/gf being intimate with another man, even if it's you, his emotions are going to be very unpredictable. And if he reacts badly then it's your friendship and his relationship at risk.
Not a simple yes or know I'm afraid. We also had a rule that we wouldn't sleep with anybody we were likely to be sat round a dinner table with. |
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I'd suggest if they really do fancy exploring the idea that you have a chilled evening together. No pressures and some flirting leading to soft play. They'll decide pretty quickly if it's something they enjoy or a hard no thanks. |
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"Final decision was thanks but no thanks. He didn’t sound disappointed but was understandably weird.
Reckon they may have marriage issues and this isn’t a solution for him."
Now’s the time to watch things get weird… let’s see how she handles rejection.
Good luck |
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