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Are you friends openly on here?
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Are there any of you that are totally open with your friends about being on fab and vice versa? What’s it like? Do you chat about it?
When I say friends, I mean friends from real life. Not online or via here or similar sites.
I’m considering telling one or two of my mates. It seems like it would be a laugh if they joined too. Keen to hear other people’s experiences |
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Mostly intrigued about clubs they ask us what they are like when we visit
"Our close friends know what we get up to and have never judged, they don’t understand it but somethings they will ask questions.
What questions do they ask?"
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Thanks for the responses. Interesting. Overall I’m getting the impression that even though many of us love this side of things, there’s still a little shame or repression about letting others know?
I’m not sure what’s changed within me, but I feel like I’m reaching a point where I’m tired of hiding aspects of my life. So I may soon start being more open about it.
I’m going to sit and think about it for a bit. Id love hear back from any others who decided to be more open, and what (if any) consequences or changes happened in their life as a result |
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Nobody knows and I don’t feel the need to tell anyone but it sometimes crosses my mind I’d like someone trustworthy to delete all the traces in case I’m gone. But then I don’t trust anyone enough to ask for this kind of thing. |
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"My friends don't need to know anything about my sex life "
Yeah same for the most part. But being a guy and hanging around with with very “lad” type friends, the subject of sex or dating does come up quite often.
Obviously when asked I don’t go into the details of sexual encounters, or even the specifics of a person behind saying “I’ve been seeing someone” or “I met someone”… but still that awkward question always arises of “how were you introduced?” and it’s caught me off guard a few times. I lie and say work, tinder, in a bar… but I’m starting to question why am I lying? And is there any point?
I know it’s not that deep, but it’s making me feel untrue to myself. |
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"Nobody knows and I don’t feel the need to tell anyone but it sometimes crosses my mind I’d like someone trustworthy to delete all the traces in case I’m gone. But then I don’t trust anyone enough to ask for this kind of thing."
I always think that. Do you remember that well known missing persons case, where the guy had a profile on here?
There should definitely be some kind of safety feature with a trusted source that can delete |
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"Nobody knows and I don’t feel the need to tell anyone but it sometimes crosses my mind I’d like someone trustworthy to delete all the traces in case I’m gone. But then I don’t trust anyone enough to ask for this kind of thing.
I always think that. Do you remember that well known missing persons case, where the guy had a profile on here?
There should definitely be some kind of safety feature with a trusted source that can delete"
I do and I think about it often, especially now, when I’m not in a good place.
I think an easy solution would be a choice of deleting the account automatically when you don’t log in for certain amount of time, something like Telegram has. |
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By *oxdawgMan 10 weeks ago
Linthorpe |
I have 2 mates (str8 on here, bi on fab guys) that are on here. Chat about it yes, the str8 guy has actually commented that because of the chats he is more relaxed about sex and subjects around it. |
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"Are there any of you that are totally open with your friends about being on fab and vice versa? What’s it like? Do you chat about it?
When I say friends, I mean friends from real life. Not online or via here or similar sites.
I’m considering telling one or two of my mates. It seems like it would be a laugh if they joined too. Keen to hear other people’s experiences "
The only one who knows to some degree is my best friend. When she broke up with her husband, we were discussing her going onto the swipey app - not that she'd ever been the girl to have a one night stand before in her life - and I kind of accidentally let it slip we're on a site but didn't name it. Now, we had a foursome with her and the husband almost a year ago so we've seen each other naked (we've seen each other naked before anyway but not in a sexual way) so if she did join here and come across us I don't think either me or Mr would be too embarrassed. My friend is quite kinky and open with discussing sex anyway, so I don't think she'd see it as odd either. But so far she's never told me she's joined and she has met someone new so I don't think there's a need for her to either.
C xoxo |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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Only one friend knows.
When I was with ex he guessed after seeing couple different couples leaving and I did not say much about who they were just said had a little get together friends last night. He kept going on about was it because we had poor sex life or one of us could not satisfy other. He could not understand why if we had good sex already. why meet others |
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By *oxy jWoman 10 weeks ago
somerset |
nope none of my vanilla friends know about the scene even tho swinging has more exposer in todays world its not something aslot want to know about hence why in % percentages to population swinging is in the very love % especially women and couples ..
not only that i like the underground feel as it makes everyday life so much easier the girls at work all have a giggle about sex but think im a prude lol if only they knew |
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Florence's friends are aware but Ali's aren't. It's like a little secret from his point of view and his private life is his own. We've put feelers out after a few drinks in terms of people's views and we find alot are still quite judgemental and hold negative views - out of jealously we believe! |
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"Nobody in our real life knows that we are on here. People are judgemental, and they make the wrong assumptions. It’s much easier not give people the chance to speculate - even good friends. "
Same here. Too many vanilla (lovely though they are) and judgmental friends in the close circle. Might be one or two outliers we could share the secret with but we decided not to risk it....which is a shame but that's the old 'better safe than sorry' approach! |
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"nope none of my vanilla friends know about the scene even tho swinging has more exposer in todays world its not something aslot want to know about hence why in % percentages to population swinging is in the very love % especially women and couples
not only that i like the underground feel as it makes everyday life so much easier the girls at work all have a giggle about sex but think im a prude lol if only they knew"
Yep, we think that even if we shared our secret with just one of the close circle of friends, pure curiosity would mean that they might want to share with others out of disbelief....no real Malice behind it (we'd hope!) But it's just not worth the risk for us.
It's a shame as we've had such a blast meeting new people (women) these last couple of years and we can't share any of our exploits!
If there wasn't such a 'snigger, nudge nudge'about the LS as a whole, it would be better...so there is an argument we should play out part in breaking down those barriers...but....we won't be! |
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By *adeiteWoman 10 weeks ago
Stafford |
No, but I am considering telling my bestie. We talk about sex very openly anyway and what we got up to with our partners, all the details. So I doubt she would bat an eye if I then added in stories with others |
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All of our close vanilla friends know that we’re on here and that we go to clubs. Funny thing is most of them assumed we were swingers before they actually knew 😂
We’ve played with our best vanilla friends on multiple occasions, that’s what led us to being on here. They’re open to fab and going to a club but they aren’t there yet. The rest of our friends are open minded anyway, some ask ‘been to a club lately’ but it doesn’t come up in conversation every time we’re together.
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