Hi, I was in the RAF when I was married to my first wife. We lived in Married Quarters on the two stations I was stationär at. She had affairs was a number of other guys on both stations. Have other guys in the forces wives cheated, or have you cheated with a wife whose husband was in the forces? |
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I don’t get it unless it’s consented to
The last thing you want whilst serving abroad is the thought that your partner could be cheating.
Your mind needs to be concentrating and fully focussed on you and your colleagues not worrying about issues at home such as that |
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By *ddfellowMan 7 hours ago
New Ferry, wirral |
back in the 80's the wifes used to put omo packets in the window's (on my own) most garrison towns were were full of it, the only rule seemed to be dont get caught, didnt bother me any, as had an arangent with my ex wife, though I came home early one morning when in germqany, and caught the neighbours wife getting out of an americans car with 3 black lads helping her as she looked like she had been rode hard and put away wet. |
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I only spent about 3 years of my service as a married man on quarter's before leaving. Of which the vast amount of that I was away. So not a huge experience of quarters life.
Definitely seen few guys popping in and out of neighbours homes and there was always the implication of it going on. Seemed often it wasn't cheating as such, more like it was consenting but not to be spoken about. Like do what what you like but don't tell me and make sure it's on the sly so others don't find out. Which to be fair with the nature of quarters life was difficult, eyes everywhere. I know some guys being told by the lads the rumours about their wife and them just being indifferent to it, as if it doesn't bother them if it were true. And to add ballance I have seen a surprising amount of serving men and women play away when away, even ones you really wouldn't expect.
Also we were all aware that there were some swingers on the married patch.
And of course my Ex used to hear the rumours at coffee morning ect. And she used to tell me the gossip. Then in the space of that time I caught wind of two rumours about her in the times I was deployed. I did not believe them in the slightest, I trusted her. However in hindsight the fact she cheated on me and ran of with someone else plus a load of other iffy stuff that came out in the wash makes me question if I was incorrect on my assertions of her innocence to the rumours. After all one of them was told me in a very serious way by someone as a concern mate, but it wasn't his first hand information. Anyways that by the by. Ironically she wouldn't have needed to cheat when I was away. If she'd just said that she needed a bit of that while I was away I'd be fine with that.
In my experience things only seemed to get bitter and scandalous when sex becomes an out of marriage relationship. Seen some very ugly situations where full blown affairs have been found out over the years. It's brutal to see the effects and awkward to be around. But these have all been proper full on affairs. Never seen a big one over someone simply shagging someone else's partner.
Mr |
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By *irldnCouple 6 hours ago
Brighton |
"I only spent about 3 years of my service as a married man on quarter's before leaving. Of which the vast amount of that I was away. So not a huge experience of quarters life.
Definitely seen few guys popping in and out of neighbours homes and there was always the implication of it going on. Seemed often it wasn't cheating as such, more like it was consenting but not to be spoken about. Like do what what you like but don't tell me and make sure it's on the sly so others don't find out. Which to be fair with the nature of quarters life was difficult, eyes everywhere. I know some guys being told by the lads the rumours about their wife and them just being indifferent to it, as if it doesn't bother them if it were true. And to add ballance I have seen a surprising amount of serving men and women play away when away, even ones you really wouldn't expect.
Also we were all aware that there were some swingers on the married patch.
And of course my Ex used to hear the rumours at coffee morning ect. And she used to tell me the gossip. Then in the space of that time I caught wind of two rumours about her in the times I was deployed. I did not believe them in the slightest, I trusted her. However in hindsight the fact she cheated on me and ran of with someone else plus a load of other iffy stuff that came out in the wash makes me question if I was incorrect on my assertions of her innocence to the rumours. After all one of them was told me in a very serious way by someone as a concern mate, but it wasn't his first hand information. Anyways that by the by. Ironically she wouldn't have needed to cheat when I was away. If she'd just said that she needed a bit of that while I was away I'd be fine with that.
In my experience things only seemed to get bitter and scandalous when sex becomes an out of marriage relationship. Seen some very ugly situations where full blown affairs have been found out over the years. It's brutal to see the effects and awkward to be around. But these have all been proper full on affairs. Never seen a big one over someone simply shagging someone else's partner.
Mr"
Learned a new term recently = ENM (ethical non-monogamy).
If people have a more relaxed attitude to sex and can trust their partner to keep things physical and not get emotional attachment(s) then this could work for people who are away a lot (like in the forces) without damaging a loving relationship. Recognise the need to be fulfilled physically but hold the emotions for your partner. |
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