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Married or attached ladies on fab
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Why is it a sin when a married or attached guy comes onto fab looking for discreet fun and women won’t entertain it but when it’s a women the goal posts get moved out the way and it becomes ok is this not double standards . |
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"I don't think it's a double standard at all
Cheating is frowned upon
Its just that most men are horny depraved fuckers that won't even entertain the idea of turning down some puss"
This!!!
It's still considered cheating but that's the nature of the beast and the world we live in!! |
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It's a huge double standard on fab. Women very rarely put threads up asking if what they're doing is wrong or trying to justify it though. However if they do mention that they're married playing away they're more likely to get sympathetic answers from both men and women.
I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault.
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By *WB85Man 12 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
I hear you op.
A few weeks back we literally had a thread from a man and one from a woman. Both secretly playing even though married.
He was a piece of shit for cheating.
She was well within her right to do it.
Basically....most women have morals and most men do not. |
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"My hubby knows I'm here he can see messages but doesn't really get involved..if your wife knows crack on if not your cheating
So still cheating then! Makes no odds just cos he knows! "
Not if its the dynamic that they both agreed to |
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I think women are more likely to be encouraged for cheating here because the site is so loaded with men, most of whom presumably find it a turn on and have no moral issues with it.
Obviously not you, fellow wise men of the forum! |
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I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
But what do I know as I'm just one of these
"Its just that most men are horny depraved fuckers that won't even entertain the idea of turning down some puss"
which isn't at all gaslighting |
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"I hear you op.
A few weeks back we literally had a thread from a man and one from a woman. Both secretly playing even though married.
He was a piece of shit for
cheating.
Well said sir
She was well within her right to do it.
Basically....most women have morals and most men do not. "
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"I hear you op.
A few weeks back we literally had a thread from a man and one from a woman. Both secretly playing even though married.
He was a piece of shit for
cheating.
Well said sir
She was well within her right to do it.
Basically....most women have morals and most men do not. "
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By *rispyDuckMan 12 weeks ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
"It's a huge double standard on fab. Women very rarely put threads up asking if what they're doing is wrong or trying to justify it though. However if they do mention that they're married playing away they're more likely to get sympathetic answers from both men and women.
I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault.
"
Nailed it 👏🏾👏🏾 |
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"I think women are more likely to be encouraged for cheating here because the site is so loaded with men, most of whom presumably find it a turn on and have no moral issues with it.
Obviously not you, fellow wise men of the forum!"
Women treat cheating women much more gently, not all women I hasten to add. I have noticed that women will try and find out why another woman is cheating and sympathise with her. |
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"I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault."
.
To be fair though, it usually *is* the man’s fault either way.
There’s another factor - women are usually much more discreet about it when they’re cheating. I know that’s a massive generalisation, but I speak from experience. |
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"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
But what do I know as I'm just one of these Its just that most men are horny depraved fuckers that won't even entertain the idea of turning down some puss which isn't at all gaslighting "
But isn't it mostly men that have that opinion considering that this site is majority men, I think your looking at the wrong demographic to get a clear idea on what MOST people think
Also I don't think you know what gaslighting means |
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"I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault.
.
To be fair though, it usually *is* the man’s fault either way.
There’s another factor - women are usually much more discreet about it when they’re cheating. I know that’s a massive generalisation, but I speak from experience. "
Is it usually the man's fault? |
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"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
"
Yep. I've seen this in action with a couple I knew years ago. He had a much lower sex drive than her according to her, several of our mutual acquaintances actively encouraged her to seek sex elsewhere and congratulated her when she did. 🤷♀️ |
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"I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault.
.
To be fair though, it usually *is* the man’s fault either way.
There’s another factor - women are usually much more discreet about it when they’re cheating. I know that’s a massive generalisation, but I speak from experience. "
I'd like to know why it's usually the man's fault? |
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"Also I don't think you know what gaslighting means nailed it but realised just as I pressed post but as I cannot edit a post I had to go with it.
"
Fair enough
I'm a fucker for doing that aswell
*press send* .... SHIT! |
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"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
Yep. I've seen this in action with a couple I knew years ago. He had a much lower sex drive than her according to her, several of our mutual acquaintances actively encouraged her to seek sex elsewhere and congratulated her when she did. 🤷♀️"
Now I wonder what would have been said if it was the other way around. No doubt he'd be a pig for saying it. |
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"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
But what do I know as I'm just one of these Its just that most men are horny depraved fuckers that won't even entertain the idea of turning down some puss which isn't at all gaslighting
But isn't it mostly men that have that opinion considering that this site is majority men, I think your looking at the wrong demographic to get a clear idea on what MOST people think
Also I don't think you know what gaslighting means"
I go with what I see on the forum posts, and I what I mostly see is man says something both men and women rip into him. Woman posts and it's more sympathetic from both men and women. |
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"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
Yep. I've seen this in action with a couple I knew years ago. He had a much lower sex drive than her according to her, several of our mutual acquaintances actively encouraged her to seek sex elsewhere and congratulated her when she did. 🤷♀️
Now I wonder what would have been said if it was the other way around. No doubt he'd be a pig for saying it. "
He was selfish for having a lower sex drive. I suggested to her that she bought a vibrator but she wouldn't hear of it. I suggested that she stopped wearing a deeply unattractive onesie type thing to bed but she said it kept her warm. 🤷♀️
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"My hubby knows I'm here he can see messages but doesn't really get involved..if your wife knows crack on if not your cheating
So still cheating then! Makes no odds just cos he knows!
Correct which we have
Not if its the dynamic that they both agreed to"
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Cheating isn't gender specific... if you are playing around outside of the arrangement with your primary partner it's cheating... if everyone is aware and consenting there's no issue with married or single etc. |
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It's because many men find cheating women hot and think they're getting one over on her partner. They won't slate a married women on a thread as it would reduce their chances of a meet with them.
Theres been so many threads started by men, wanting to meet a woman who is here behind her other half's back over the years. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 12 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I have permission but still treated like I'm cheating!
It's a horrible double standard, man posts that he has a sexless marriage then he's the problem because he clearly only wants his wife for sex. But soon as a woman posts the same reason it's your husband is an arse and you should leave him.
But what do I know as I'm just one of these Its just that most men are horny depraved fuckers that won't even entertain the idea of turning down some puss which isn't at all gaslighting
But isn't it mostly men that have that opinion considering that this site is majority men, I think your looking at the wrong demographic to get a clear idea on what MOST people think
Also I don't think you know what gaslighting means
I go with what I see on the forum posts, and I what I mostly see is man says something both men and women rip into him. Woman posts and it's more sympathetic from both men and women. "
Because 'some' men will see it as a means to make that person look bad in the hope of elevating their status and improving their chances with the women on site, and 'some' other men will just see it as a potential target for their affections.
I'm not sure whether women in general will be more sympathetic to cheating women or not. I guess it will depend on their own viewpoint and personal experiences.
I've no opinion on anyone cheating bar having no desire to meet them and help them achieve their goals, whether they're male or female. People do what people do. I just worry about my own life. What they do doesn't impact me at all. |
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By *tew008Man 12 weeks ago
edinburgh |
There was a post by a women asking about this in the lounge. Definitely was a double standard even if some were fair. Husband still got blamed and she still got offers. Whether it’s society or fab dynamics there’s a skewed standard. |
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Definitely double standards on here and not just when it comes to the cheating topic 🙄
Personally we wouldn't entertain anyone who was going behind their partners back, not something we would want any part of 🤷♂️ Recently been messaged by a local lady who looked perfect 😍 for us until we found out was behind her partners back....instant turn off 😕 |
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There is most certainly a double standard in society when it comes to dating and mating! More so than ever right now and it all translates into swinging as well.
I've experienced it numerous times.
My wife and I have a cuckquean / hot husband dynamic / Open - poly (and yes, we do have a couples account on here).
We are quite happy to meet other couples and single females but the second I try to fly solo, there's always "questions".
On fab there is no shortage of women or couples who assume I'm up to something behind my wife's back or wont meet because I'm married. Whatever! It is what it is. It got to the point where I don't even attempt to meet anyone through fab now (it's just for staying in touch with folks and club event notifications).
We both go to clubs and social events and even there, it's not unusual for us to be met by surprise and yeah, it's not going to be for some people. We had a discussion with a lady recently who, whilst she was married and at the club on her own, "didn't get it" and would never allow her husband to play on his own as she would get jealous! But she could play solo obviously as that was their dynamic!
It is what it is! There's always going to be a one rule for me and another for thee mentality across the board! Not just in swinging but in all walks of life.
Just got to deal with it. You wont change some peoples minds no matter what so leave them to it and move on.
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By (user no longer on site) 12 weeks ago
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I've seen a married couple state in profile no attached people then I look at their verifications and I've seen guys that state they are married and need to be discreet but because they have a good body and stuff they've had a meet with multiple members stating no attached but as long as they look good it seems fine |
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It's sounds little bit like a sour Grapes thread again.
Personally I don't see there is a huge core double standard. With regards the many men who will sleep with cheating females I'd say this is more a differing male standard than it is a double standard. I don't think there is a great deal of extra sympathy for females on here apart from given by those looking to get into the ladies pants.
There are a lot of females on here who go behind the backs of their partners. However these are totally dwarfed by the numbers of males doing it on here (which may be in line with the general male:female ratio on here). Therefore like in general on fab those women are going to naturally find more fertile ground and people willing to make more compromise on other aspects than for members of the vastly over supplied male market.
I would say the route issue to this phenomenon is how behaviour gender standards play out in everyday life, the vastly uneven ratios and the differences in general in how male and female promiscuity play out. Its not even because the society we have built is not an even experience for men and women. This is a side effect of that.
Mr
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My wife and I both play solo but the opportunities and successes are greatly in her favour. I am ambivulant to it now. I know I will probably only appeal to a very small margin of the crowd on Fab. My married status is possibly a factor against me but not the only one. My wife and I know im not cheating so i dont care what anyone else feels. As it happens im not looking to fuck my way through Fab in anycase, i would prefer to gather a select few, friends whom I can share my leisure time with, enjoy thier company and give a little joy back. Ive met some beautiful souls already so im all good right now, if I meet more then all the better and if not ce la vie.  |
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"My hubby knows I'm here he can see messages but doesn't really get involved..if your wife knows crack on if not your cheating
So still cheating then! Makes no odds just cos he knows! "
No...cheating involves lieing and deceit...if the other partner knows there's no deceit involved. |
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"Why is it a sin when a married or attached guy comes onto fab looking for discreet fun and women won’t entertain it but when it’s a women the goal posts get moved out the way and it becomes ok is this not double standards . "
It’s only double standards if the same person calls a married man playing away a “cheating scumbag, think of your poor wife!” and a married woman playing away “oh you go girl, empower yourself!”…. 
As you’re clearly bi OP, and have veris to the fact, I would suggest you continue to meet other bi men to fill your needs which aren’t being met at home. I can guarantee, the ratio of bi men looking for discreet, no strings fun far outweighs the number of attached ladies looking for similar in here…..  |
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By (user no longer on site) 9 weeks ago
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"It's a huge double standard on fab. Women very rarely put threads up asking if what they're doing is wrong or trying to justify it though. However if they do mention that they're married playing away they're more likely to get sympathetic answers from both men and women.
I always think the attitude is
Man cheating = man's fault
Woman cheating= man's fault.
"
Pretty much nailed it there |
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