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Question for single blokes
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would go with the couple if i had agreed to meet them first. Being reliable is very important for a single bloke on here. But being greedy, if the single fem was in the morning and the couple in the evening i would do both  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Common courtesy dictates that you should meet the couple because that was the first arrangement that was committed too.
That said, when I was on here as a single I think I would have been torn and very much doubt that would have been my sole criteria for making that decision. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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to be honest I mainly seek one on one meets, thats my preference..i like to get intimate
theres some things u sometimes cant do with someone elses partner
but if u arrange a meet/time/date never let someone down because there is a 'better' meet
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would stick to what I have arranged its not nice to toss Somone a side if u have all ready made plans with them for something else . If it's to do with ur children or family that's fine they always come first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A good while ago, I met with a single male. It wasnt until a few days after I found out, he was supposed to meet with a couple but decided to meet with me (fairly last minute) instead 
The couple were not impressed, even though he was honest with them (he said)& I dont think he ever did meet with them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would keep the meet that I had made first. If the second meet didnt understand thats up to them, but due to the amount of timewasters on here ruining it for genuine guys I would not expect to meet the 2nd one as they would probably think I was pixssing them around. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I'd ask the couple if they minded her joining us and invite her
Two birds with the one stone so to speak "
And what about asking her if she fancied joining them ?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? "
In all honesty.. meet the single woman |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well wouldn't that be part of the invite "
Not the way you termed it, no !
So that begs the question, who would you ask about joining first, the single fem or the couple ?
Knowing that either party may say 'no' and you end up in an even more awkward position. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would honour the arrangements already made and re-arrange. If they couldn't, it wasn't meant to be.
Though the likelihood of my ending up in this situation, two meets requesting the same weekend, is just shy of improbable. If it did, I would immediately purchase a metric ton of lottery tickets and scratch cards. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? "
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
"
Why not ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
"
Single woman woukd win x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
Why not ?"
I just think most men would go for the single woman, perhaps thinking the couples would be easier to rearrange.
Ive also met fellas that, half an hour into the meet announce...oh I was going to meet a couple tonight...but I thought I'd meet you instead ( that might be bullshit though) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd meet the couple. But then if I was offered a meet at the same time by a single fem - I'd assume she'd understand as the reason I'd give for not meeting would be the couple !
If she didn't like that and never offered again - would I worry? Nope. Chances are I'd have a great time with the couple so why would I?
It's not a question of 'is one meet better/more important than the other?' - simply a question of which plans are confirmed first!
As others have said - there's always the option to ask if the fem could join in - that would be an option if you already knew the couple, and it's something I have done before and am planning to do again.
I honestly don't think any decent single would kick off at having a meet declined on the basis the other party has plans. Washing your hair, tired, or any similar lame excuse/sob story, would more than likely kill any chance of a second chance - but a previously arranged meet? Lets be reasonable!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
Why not ?
I just think most men would go for the single woman, perhaps thinking the couples would be easier to rearrange.
Ive also met fellas that, half an hour into the meet announce...oh I was going to meet a couple tonight...but I thought I'd meet you instead ( that might be bullshit though)"
I can see the logic in your thoughts
I guess i must be the old fashioned sort that sticks to what is arranged, even if a more attractive proposition does come along - and yes that has happened
Far better to be a 'it never happened' than an unreliable timewaster in my book.
I wonder how many guys have met couples and started off with summat along the lines of 'well this had better be bloody good cos i av given up the chance of meetin a single lass to be here' ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thats currently my situation.
But i would choose the arrangements which were made first, as there would be an expectation to turn up after a social and building a good rapport.
 |
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
"
Well, seeing as i've recently been in this situation, and made exactly the same choice as i stated above.....yeah, pretty sure i'd stick to it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
Why not ?
I just think most men would go for the single woman, perhaps thinking the couples would be easier to rearrange.
Ive also met fellas that, half an hour into the meet announce...oh I was going to meet a couple tonight...but I thought I'd meet you instead ( that might be bullshit though)"
And that made you feel good?  |
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"I just wonder as it must be preferable for a single guy to meet a single woman, so they don't have to share? "
I like sharing....
But like most i would go with first meet arranged.
So if the lady had offered first, i would have met her, and if the couple had, i would have met them.
I would also be honest with the second person / couple and say i had one arranged |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just wonder as it must be preferable for a single guy to meet a single woman, so they don't have to share? "
Nope. If I want to meet a couple that's what I'll seek out.
Likewise a single.
And sometimes - hey, why not both!!
Sometimes I honestly believe that us singles have it way easier when it comes to preferences and looking for suitable company as we only have our own 'wants ' to consider!
Sure there are some couples that are happy to play alone - but there's more complications in trying to meet solo, even with a partners blessing!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I just wonder as it must be preferable for a single guy to meet a single woman, so they don't have to share?
Nope. If I want to meet a couple that's what I'll seek out.
Likewise a single.
And sometimes - hey, why not both!!
Sometimes I honestly believe that us singles have it way easier when it comes to preferences and looking for suitable company as we only have our own 'wants ' to consider!
Sure there are some couples that are happy to play alone - but there's more complications in trying to meet solo, even with a partners blessing!
"
Spot on Obiiiiii! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? "
First come, first served - and no, that's not a pun! And there are no exceptions. A 'booking' is a booking. I'd stick with the couple. |
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It is great to read that all of you would honour their original commitment...
But, what if the single man suggested to bring the single lady along to the meeting with the couple, would that break your promise or enhance the attraction of the meet? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Id see if it was poss to invite the single lady along to the couple meet...as long as all parties are happy to do so. Failing that..first cum..first serve. Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id see if it was poss to invite the single lady along to the couple meet...as long as all parties are happy to do so. Failing that..first cum..first serve. Xx"
i dont think that just because one of the parties concerned can cum quickest they should be first in line.
had to be said sorry x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id see if it was poss to invite the single lady along to the couple meet...as long as all parties are happy to do so. Failing that..first cum..first serve. Xx
i dont think that just because one of the parties concerned can cum quickest they should be first in line.
had to be said sorry x "
You have miss read that my friend.
What im saying is...be honest with ths couple and thw single person. Throw the question in there "how bout we all meet" if they all concur..great..if not..stick with the first offer you made.
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So, all things being equal, if neither meet had been confirmed and so no one let down, would most single men meet the woman? Isn't a meet with a couple more exciting, and more intrinsic to what this site's about?
It also seems, in the given scenario, that meeting the couple has the most to offer even from a selfish perspective; if the girl is genuine, why wouldn't she meet another time? (And might even be impressed that the guy had the integrity to stick to his arrangements.) |
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Couple. I would explain to the single woman I already had something arranged. I would hope she is fine with that and wouldn't want me to cancel on the couple. If she did expect me to cancel it would speak volumes about her to me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do wonder if any single women would go for the 'being taken along to the couple' because I know I would say yeah thanks but no thanks.
If I wanted to meet with a couple, I'd of approached a couple, If I approach a single male, then I want a single male.
I'd hate to be treated as an 'accessory' |
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"I would honour the arrangements already made and re-arrange. If they couldn't, it wasn't meant to be.
Though the likelihood of my ending up in this situation, two meets requesting the same weekend, is just shy of improbable. If it did, I would immediately purchase a metric ton of lottery tickets and scratch cards. "
Don't know why, but got me chuckling |
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman?
majority is saying they would stay with first arrangement..
What do you reckon .....do you believe them?
I don't !!!!!
"
I have to be honest, the words "bull shit, yeah right" and "pull the other one" has accompanied every post I've read bar one!
I don't know why I don't believe the Pinocchio's (sniggers) I just don't either!  |
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"I do wonder if any single women would go for the 'being taken along to the couple' because I know I would say yeah thanks but no thanks.
If I wanted to meet with a couple, I'd of approached a couple, If I approach a single male, then I want a single male.
I'd hate to be treated as an 'accessory' "
Gives an insight into the minds of some men. A couple arrange a meet with a single man and he offers to bring along a woman the couple don't know, and offering the woman without asking.
If someone suggests a date to meet and I've another meet arranged, it clashes with Corrie etc I simply say I have other plans.
I'm under no obligations to give chapter and verse why I can't meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? "
Stick with whomever the first meet was made with and hope they don't cancel it.  |
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"I do wonder if any single women would go for the 'being taken along to the couple' because I know I would say yeah thanks but no thanks.
If I wanted to meet with a couple, I'd of approached a couple, If I approach a single male, then I want a single male.
I'd hate to be treated as an 'accessory' "
does it not depend on the couple (i.e. do you fancy them) and how it was approached? if the guy takes for granted that everyone will go along with it, like their all their for his fun, then that's not so good, but if in principle the other liked foursomes, there would have to be some way of asking nicely without making presumptions. |
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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago
Midlothian |
What i know is:there are men who have integrity and keep their engagement
What i learned here is:some will let cpl's down,good luck to them that the single fem.is worth it!Word goes round amongst friends about certain type of guys 
Some assume cpl's are happy for 3sum to turn to 4sum well we rather meet a cpl or regular Fb's for 4sum than 2 singles who don't know each other + therefor not a cpl or Fb's.
My advise:think carefully about getting a reputation for letting cpl's down unless you realy only interested in meeting single fems
Good job:12 month on here and never been let down by either single guy or cpl
Happy Swinging susie
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I do wonder if any single women would go for the 'being taken along to the couple' because I know I would say yeah thanks but no thanks.
If I wanted to meet with a couple, I'd of approached a couple, If I approach a single male, then I want a single male.
I'd hate to be treated as an 'accessory' "
But why would you think the couple would want to have another woman there anyway? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd rather the guy was honest and met the couple if they were the plans he had made...I'd respect him far more for it. Have had guys telling me to cancel pre-arranged meets though to meet them before now which always results in them being told where to go.
Not sure why it's assumed though that a meet with a single female is more enticing than a meet with a couple |
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"Not sure why it's assumed though that a meet with a single female is more enticing than a meet with a couple "
Ultimately depends on what the guy really wants. If his preference is single females, then that's a given, and more intimate (potentially) experience for him. If he's really into couples, then a 3-some will win over a one on one meet everytime.
As you said, honesty is the best policy in situations like that. alongside tact and a degree of respect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't cancel any arrangement already made personally. I may contact the couple to confirm they were still ok for the meet but realistically time is limited anyway for meets with work etc so you just tell the single when you can meet and if that's no good then that's life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is great to read that all of you would honour their original commitment...
But, what if the single man suggested to bring the single lady along to the meeting with the couple, would that break your promise or enhance the attraction of the meet? "
I wouldn't suggest it, specially if it was the couple who contacted ME in the first place as they were looking for a single guy. The addition of another fem to the mix would, obviously, change the dynamic and may not be what the couple were looking for. If they wanted that, they would have looked for a couple, would they not..?
Not only that, if it was to be the first time I had mat the single woman, I would not know enough about her OR the couple and wouldn't have a clear enough idea whether it would be a good 'mix'. For me, the cons would outweigh the pros... |
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"I just wonder as it must be preferable for a single guy to meet a single woman, so they don't have to share? "
I was taught sharing is good I would stick to first arrangement, also I have a preference for playing with couples |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The perfect way to rectify the situation would be to take the single girl with you to meet the couple.
That obviously depends on their preferences.
If it wasn't then go with the meet you set up first, treat others how you would like to be treated. |
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By *rwolfMan
over a year ago
bristol |
Honesty goes a long way on here. its a shame most people are not.
If i arrange a meet im there 5 mins early to make sure im in the right place.
polite, well mannered, non pushy and take things at pace.
HOWEVER
for what its worth there are to many bullshitters on here that will lie about wanting to meet, being able to meet or just ignorant that someone has put things on hold for them and are just damn right rude!
either way a simple message to rearrange makes the difference between being an arsehole i report and a second chance |
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Personally I'd stick with the original arrangements and meet the couple and arrange another date for the single female. If the couple meet went well I'd mention the single fem and see if they'd fancy a 4sum. If they did then after meeting the single fem I'd raise it with her and cross my fingers! |
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By *quirrelMan
over a year ago
East Manchester |
Stay with the original plan and meet as agreed.
Explain to the lady you are a man of your word and have promised to be somewhere else at the time she wanted to meet, give her the option of either rescheduling or joining in.
Never break a promise or appointment you have made, your word its the only thing you have in your favour. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm astonished at the number of people who would "take the single lady (who the OP has never met) along to join the couple (who the OP has only met socially)"!
That seems to give a 95% chance of offending or upsetting THREE people, rather than a much lower chance of risking offence to 1 or 2 people. And all so that he can "have his cake and eat it" ??? I would _iew this behaviour as very disrepectful and selfish. |
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"I'm astonished at the number of people who would "take the single lady (who the OP has never met) along to join the couple (who the OP has only met socially)"!
That seems to give a 95% chance of offending or upsetting THREE people, rather than a much lower chance of risking offence to 1 or 2 people. And all so that he can "have his cake and eat it" ??? I would _iew this behaviour as very disrepectful and selfish. "
At the same time, so long as everyone's profile preferences match there may not be any harm in honestly explaining the situation and proposing the idea. You'd have to not word it like a knobhead though haha. |
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"This is more just wondering out loud really, if you had struck up a rapport with a couple on here, maybe had a social, and had arranged to play on a specific date. Then say a single woman you'd been chatting with wanted to meet that same weekend but you didn't have the time to meet both the couple and the single woman, would you keep the arrangements with couple or cancel them and meet the single woman? "
Always keep my word. Above all things
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm astonished at the number of people who would "take the single lady (who the OP has never met) along to join the couple (who the OP has only met socially)"!
That seems to give a 95% chance of offending or upsetting THREE people, rather than a much lower chance of risking offence to 1 or 2 people. And all so that he can "have his cake and eat it" ??? I would _iew this behaviour as very disrepectful and selfish. "
 especially as if the couple wanted a foursome, surely they would've just arranged a meet with another couple! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Keep whatever arrangements were made first without hesitation."
exactly... its not even about whether it is a single or a couple to be honest... its whoever i had made the arrangements with first....
if you don't have honour then you don't have anything..... |
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I would also honor the arrangements , im not quite so sure why that decision is not entirely believed , if i had agreed to meet its not through desperation or barrel scraping i would be looking forward to the encounter ,just as much as a single meet x i think suggesting the four way , done correctly would be a good idea , i would suggest it to couple first x |
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"Keep whatever arrangements were made first without hesitation."
Whoever I had arranged first. It's fair and it's manners and I'd hope the single lady accepted that as if she did, she would only have to wait till the next day |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would also honor the arrangements , im not quite so sure why that decision is not entirely believed , if i had agreed to meet its not through desperation or barrel scraping i would be looking forward to the encounter ,just as much as a single meet x i think suggesting the four way , done correctly would be a good idea , i would suggest it to couple first x"
But like I said earlier, why if they wanted a foursome would they have arranged to meet a single guy and not another couple? |
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"I would also honor the arrangements , im not quite so sure why that decision is not entirely believed , if i had agreed to meet its not through desperation or barrel scraping i would be looking forward to the encounter ,just as much as a single meet x i think suggesting the four way , done correctly would be a good idea , i would suggest it to couple first x
But like I said earlier, why if they wanted a foursome would they have arranged to meet a single guy and not another couple? "
disagree with that , the couple maybe open minded ,flexible, curious ,spontaneous , there is not much chance they were meeting their ideal because i was busy ,
if they were a cool couple they would easily say not this time x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would also honor the arrangements , im not quite so sure why that decision is not entirely believed , if i had agreed to meet its not through desperation or barrel scraping i would be looking forward to the encounter ,just as much as a single meet x i think suggesting the four way , done correctly would be a good idea , i would suggest it to couple first x
But like I said earlier, why if they wanted a foursome would they have arranged to meet a single guy and not another couple?
disagree with that , the couple maybe open minded ,flexible, curious ,spontaneous , there is not much chance they were meeting their ideal because i was busy ,
if they were a cool couple they would easily say not this time x"
Why should they? And they'd be a 'cool couple' that someone they'd wanted to meet alone for a mfm would want to bring someone along they'd never met? Have a word with yourself |
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Ah i see you misunderstand , no one has or is suggesting they should do anything , it has only be suggested that they forward the chance opportunity to chat to the lovely couple if wishes to please , bear in mind we have no details on the personalities of the couple x |
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Ah i see you misunderstand , no one has or is suggesting they should do anything , it has only be suggested that he should forward the chance opportunity to the lovely couple .as he of course wishes to please , bear in mind we have no details on the personalities of the couple x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Keep couple meet and tell woman I'd already got a meet with some friends but to try and arrange her meet for another time. I'd probably also say I'd tell her about 'some' of the fun that we got up to.
Ladies do love juicy gossip. |
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