FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > First contact??

First contact??

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Now what's best, you see a profile you like, there close, there after a male, I send a polite but short hi etc etc with a face pic..... And delete!!!.... So I put more effort in like I see so many profiles asking for and then???..... Delete!! Nothing... Now I know I'm not Tom Cruise but don't think I'm Egor either??... It seems whatever you do you can't even get a civil or polite no thanks???? Where's the manners gone in this site???

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Now what's best, you see a profile you like, there close, there after a male, I send a polite but short hi etc etc with a face pic..... And delete!!!.... So I put more effort in like I see so many profiles asking for and then???..... Delete!! Nothing... Now I know I'm not Tom Cruise but don't think I'm Egor either??... It seems whatever you do you can't even get a civil or

polite no thanks???? Where's the

manners gone in this site???"

Fuck knows.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

polite no thanks???? Where's the

manners gone in this site???

Fuck knows.

Frustrating ell!!!! Lol

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By *ady4ladyWoman over a year ago

liverpool

Maybe you are better looking and fitter than the Mr in their profile so he is blocking you ?

Or maybe, you just dont meet what they are looking for.?

Either way just accept and move on, you will succeed eventually

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By *andCCouple over a year ago

Leicester

If you received a polite "no thanks", would you accept it graciously, or would you like many others, then try and initiate a long and pointless dialogue ..asking for explanations etc?

You can't force people to reply; there are so many pointless threads in this vein.

Even the FAQ's ...or site guidelines, state that;

"It is not rude, not to reply".

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Maybe you are better looking and fitter than the Mr in their profile so he is blocking you ?

Or maybe, you just dont meet what they are looking for.?

Either way just accept and move on, you will succeed eventually

I like you're first reason

lol

I've just given up making an effort cos I'm convinced it dont matter what you put they take one look at your pic and decide from that??

But then I wonder is not making an effort backfiring on me??

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

so many messages recieved every day by girls that they cant look at every one. just keep trying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We get alot of messages from people who are of no interest to us but always try to send a polite reply.... it's the persistent ones who annoy us! Clearly don't remember sending the same copy/paste message the week earlier

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By *wingerdelightCouple over a year ago

eastliegh

"We get alot of messages from people who are of no interest to us but always try to send a polite reply.... it's the persistent ones who annoy us! Clearly don't remember sending the same copy/paste message the week earlier

We get this alot people seeing your looking for a male so they message without reading further.

And to the op they may just not fancy you.

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By *ady4ladyWoman over a year ago

liverpool

"Maybe you are better looking and fitter than the Mr in their profile so he is blocking you ?

Or maybe, you just dont meet what they are looking for.?

Either way just accept and move on, you will succeed eventually

I like you're first reason

lol

I've just given up making an effort cos I'm convinced it dont matter what you put they take one look at your pic and decide from that??

But then I wonder is not making an effort backfiring on me??"

ok, think like the lottery, you gotta be in it to win it. Giving up and not making an effort guarantees failure.

Try changing your pic to something a little more 'teasing'.... ( put the full naked one in your private ones for a bit). Try torso with jeans, open, boxers showing etc. Maybe the people you are contacting would prefer to unwrap you rather than see you fully naked.

Im not saying your pic is wrong or anything, its just that sometimes a change of pic or change of attitude on the profile attracts the right people x

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By *riendly foeWoman over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

[Removed by poster at 21/03/13 21:49:50]

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"If you received a polite "no thanks", would you accept it graciously, or would you like many others, then try and initiate a long and pointless dialogue ..asking for explanations etc?

You can't force people to reply; there are so many pointless threads in this vein.

Even the FAQ's ...or site guidelines, state that;

"It is not rude, not to reply".

In all honesty I would accept it and have the whole two times that someone did that!!!...

I guess there's alot of people (mostly single men) with issues that have caused basic good manners to be eradicated off this site, now it is common practice to just ignore people??

Maybe I'm just different, if I make the effort to put a message together to someone who's criteria I meet I would expect a reply, but if I didn't meet their criteria then I wouldn't expect owt

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By *eedseeingtoWoman over a year ago

North Wales

"so many messages recieved every day by girls that they cant look at every one. just keep trying "

thats what ive been telling a bloke but he keeps on giving me shit so ive blocked him

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By *ady4ladyWoman over a year ago

liverpool

"so many messages recieved every day by girls that they cant look at every one. just keep trying "

That old chestnut ....... 'I have 200 messages in my inbox, cant read them all'....... maybe that is true for a newbie, but surely the numbers go down in time, or do you think ladies stay massively popular the whole time they are on here??? just a thought!

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By *riendly foeWoman over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

You are straight....which is questionable!

You prefer daytime fun and dont accommodate......again, questionable!

Why complain?

Just accept that it happens and move on....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you received a polite "no thanks", would you accept it graciously, or would you like many others, then try and initiate a long and pointless dialogue ..asking for explanations etc?

You can't force people to reply; there are so many pointless threads in this vein.

Even the FAQ's ...or site guidelines, state that;

"It is not rude, not to reply".

In all honesty I would accept it and have the whole two times that someone did that!!!...

I guess there's alot of people (mostly single men) with issues that have caused basic good manners to be eradicated off this site, now it is common practice to just ignore people??

Maybe I'm just different, if I make the effort to put a message together to someone who's criteria I meet I would expect a reply, but if I didn't meet their criteria then I wouldn't expect owt"

A profile is only a vague description of what people want. It would be like a novel if everyone tried to explain all their likes and dislikes.. Short and to the point.

So doesn't mean u fit their criteria..

If they reply or not, they are not interested so does it really matter cos its not gonna go any further..

Why worry about the actions of a stranger u will never meet or converse with

Concentrate on those who do show interest

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Maybe you are better looking and fitter than the Mr in their profile so he is blocking you ?

Or maybe, you just dont meet what they are looking for.?

Either way just accept and move on, you will succeed eventually

I like you're first reason

lol

I've just given up making an effort cos I'm convinced it dont matter what you put they take one look at your pic and decide from that??

But then I wonder is not making an effort backfiring on me??

ok, think like the lottery, you gotta be in it to win it. Giving up and not making an effort guarantees failure.

Im not saying your pic is wrong or anything, its just that sometimes a change of pic or change of attitude on the profile attracts the right people x

Thanks ill take this advice onboard

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By *andCCouple over a year ago

Leicester

"If you received a polite "no thanks", would you accept it graciously, or would you like many others, then try and initiate a long and pointless dialogue ..asking for explanations etc?

You can't force people to reply; there are so many pointless threads in this vein.

Even the FAQ's ...or site guidelines, state that;

"It is not rude, not to reply".

In all honesty I would accept it and have the whole two times that someone did that!!!...

I guess there's alot of people (mostly single men) with issues that have caused basic good manners to be eradicated off this site, now it is common practice to just ignore people??

Maybe I'm just different, if I make the effort to put a message together to someone who's criteria I meet I would expect a reply, but if I didn't meet their criteria then I wouldn't expect owt"

In an ideal world, yes it would be reasonable to expect a reply. Many think they do meet the criteria as set out in someones profile, but these same people are often wrong - it is plain to see, that many do not read the profile thoroughly enough.

You have to accept that there is no way you can force people to use this site in the way you would like them to

You can "expect" away to your hearts content, but ultimately you are wasting your time as it is unlikely that it will ever be mandatory for the recipient of your message to reply ...which is why I see these threads (and there have been many similar ones) as pointless. No offence intended.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

the women on here are so fooking ignorant, its enough to turn you gay isn't it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You are straight....which is questionable!

You prefer daytime fun and dont accommodate......again, questionable!

Why complain?

Just accept that it happens and move on...."

I don't find men attractive so I'm straight,

I'm separated from my ex and back at my moms hence not accom, I have my kids of a weekend, and to get weekends off from work I have to do the crappy evening shifts, maybe I should rewrite my profile s bit

Forums are here for people to complain and share points of view

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

the women on here are so fooking ignorant, its enough to turn you gay isn't it

Yanno!!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

the women on here are so fooking ignorant, its enough to turn you gay isn't it

Yanno!!! Lol"

can i watch?

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By *ady4ladyWoman over a year ago

liverpool

[Removed by poster at 21/03/13 22:57:30]

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By *ady4ladyWoman over a year ago

liverpool

"You are straight....which is questionable!

You prefer daytime fun and dont accommodate......again, questionable!

Why complain?

Just accept that it happens and move on....

I don't find men attractive so I'm straight,

Forums are here for people to complain and share points of view

You do not need to explain your sexuality to anyone.

But..... I do think it would help you if you explain your situation re your children etc as many will just assume you are married .

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"so many messages recieved every day by girls that they cant look at every one. just keep trying

thats what ive been telling a bloke but he keeps on giving me shit so ive blocked him

See at least you replied, good manners that is, regardless him being an ass lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Fair point _ady4lady

ill have a type up cheers

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There is a parallel here between Fabswingers and conception. The Ms are the sperm. The F and MF are the egg. Imagine thousands of sperm trying to get to the egg. They are not all going to get a polite no thanks are they?

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By *leasurexxWoman over a year ago

Birmingham

Same as above you are limited as to when you can meet..and i was gonna say same about the pic..its damn sexy but i prefer to be teased into wanting to find out what's in someone's jeans

i think u just need to keep trying and the right couple/fem will respond to you x

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By *eedseeingtoWoman over a year ago

North Wales

"so many messages recieved every day by girls that they cant look at every one. just keep trying

thats what ive been telling a bloke but he keeps on giving me shit so ive blocked him

See at least you replied, good manners that is, regardless him being an ass lol"

exactly and he kept on coming back goving me shit day in day out being to pushy told him once i get through the messages as im new ill answer him but wasnt having it what else cluld i have done

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By *issy louWoman over a year ago

Staffordshire Moorlands

Statuses moaning that you can't "get a shag" on here won't help your cause! Its not guaranteed that you get a shag on here, you have to make the effort! Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well I've gained some helpfull tips so have re wrote my profile txt and pics, hopefully for the better

Now I've got to go message a hundred or so singles and couples in the hope of one reply lol

Thanks you sexy Fabbers

xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

the women on here are so fooking ignorant, its enough to turn you gay isn't it

Yanno!!! Lol

can i watch?

Lol sure

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/03/13 07:50:14]

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Nigel lol,

nice to know someone shares my frustrations

Suppose it does all come down to the m/f ratios being so not in our favour, getting numerous messages they can just delete delete delete without batting an eyelid, now if they were only getting one a day or every other day I bet you would see a change in response lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Statuses moaning that you can't "get a shag" on here won't help your cause! Its not guaranteed that you get a shag on here, you have to make the effort! Good luck

Don't you think lol

I know it's not guaranteed but did imagine a site full of sexually open minded folk it would be easier to find someone local to have some fun with than going up down and chatting someone up?

The reality to me is that this site for a single male is bloody hard work!!! Sending mail after mail, making an effort with what you write trying to stand out from the crowd without sounding pushy or cocky... Trying to guess weather they want a filthy talking kinda message or a more friendly approach only to end up with delete delete delete!!!

I don't take it personally but it does become frustrating!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Statuses moaning that you can't "get a shag" on here won't help your cause! Its not guaranteed that you get a shag on here, you have to make the effort! Good luck

Don't you think lol

I know it's not guaranteed but did imagine a site full of sexually open minded folk it would be easier to find someone local to have some fun with than going up down and chatting someone up?

I don't take it personally but it does become frustrating!!"

It's so much easier to just go out and chat someone up as there is so much more competition on here than in a bar. So if you are just looking to hook up with people, go out. I use this site to look for different things from normal. So i'll still go on nights out with friends to find my ususal type of girl, but i'll look on here if i want fun with an older woman, or a couple; the kind of thing i wouldnt typically get from a night out

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

I always read the profile before the message unless I can see from the message they haven't read my profile, so instant delete, ie I'm in a hotel...

For me, your profile would ensure a delete without reading from me. A pic that shows you as a "geezer", a profile devoid of any information apart from you expect a clean woman: axiomatic I'd have thought,

, too tight to offer to share hotel but wanting to go to someone elses gaff. I know on here you've mentioned your situation, very few people read the forums so, as it is you come across married, selfish and dull.

That's just my impression...but I doubt I'm alone in my thinking.

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By *ssexguy69Man over a year ago

thurrock Essex

if i send a polite message and it gets deleated i do think a no thanks would be nice but i dont dwell on it ,but if i get a no thanks then that to me is fair enough i move on, i never go on hagging then on why ,yes it is frustracting but thats life

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"if i send a polite message and it gets deleated i do think a no thanks would be nice but i dont dwell on it ,but if i get a no thanks then that to me is fair enough i move on, i never go on hagging then on why ,yes it is frustracting but thats life

I reply to everyone who meets what I'm looking for, as I clearly state I won't respond to those that don't!

Of the 60 or so messages I've received this year, so I'm hardly inundated so could reply to all, I've responded to three!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I always read the profile before the message unless I can see from the message they haven't read my profile, so instant delete, ie I'm in a hotel...

That's just my impression...but I doubt I'm alone in my thinking."

Funny how people interpret things?? And cheers for the heads up ill have a re think

See there's me thinking my pics fairly normal, no cock shot that everyone moans about and not showing nowt to ideally gain some interest?

Again I've kept info to a minimum thinking I would get questioned and maybe build up a conversation

And thought emphasising I'm clean and play safe by wanting the same is a good thing

And it's your assumption that I wouldn't share a hotel as I would, but again goes back to the logic of keeping things to a minimum

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