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The Funniest - Weirdest meet you had ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The Funniest - Weirdest meet I had was when a few years back, id chatted to a nice women on another site; she being 38 at time - we flirted for weeks and weeks - she sent me nice face and body pics (nowt kinky) - and we even texted each other. She asked to meet me in Hull, so I agreed to do so for a social, i arrived first and parked up where i said i would - i knew what car she had so waited until eventually i saw it up up right up behind mine; she had text to say she come and sit in my car...well my jaw dropped as she climbed into my car for me to notice that she was a "he" in a dress and as i then found out 67 years old.... so there i am sat in my car with a 67 year old CD man who looked as if it was his first time out lol dressed.....

It gets better/ funnier --- After i said politely that he/she had lied to me he/she then went on to climb out of my car and started to cry loudly with his make up running all down his face...... needless to say i drove off waving....

Now don't get me wrong nothing wrong with a CD/TV/TS some are cracking looking and well presented...but the lying at this level was a bit OTT

So.... whats your funniest / weirdest experiences ???

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

aww bless thats not nice

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"The Funniest - Weirdest meet I had was when a few years back, id chatted to a nice women on another site; she being 38 at time - we flirted for weeks and weeks - she sent me nice face and body pics (nowt kinky) - and we even texted each other. She asked to meet me in Hull, so I agreed to do so for a social, i arrived first and parked up where i said i would - i knew what car she had so waited until eventually i saw it up up right up behind mine; she had text to say she come and sit in my car...well my jaw dropped as she climbed into my car for me to notice that she was a "he" in a dress and as i then found out 67 years old.... so there i am sat in my car with a 67 year old CD man who looked as if it was his first time out lol dressed.....

It gets better/ funnier --- After i said politely that he/she had lied to me he/she then went on to climb out of my car and started to cry loudly with his make up running all down his face...... needless to say i drove off waving....

Now don't get me wrong nothing wrong with a CD/TV/TS some are cracking looking and well presented...but the lying at this level was a bit OTT

So.... whats your funniest / weirdest experiences ??? "

Someone I met told me a similar story. He'd been chatting with a woman for a couple of weeks, really fell for her.

He decided he wanted more so arranged to meet for a proper date, to see a play in Drury Lane, then dinner. Waiting outside the theatre he noticed after a while only he and another bloke were waiting for their dates.

Then the other bloke approaced him! The other bloke honestly thought it wouldn't matter and expected to be taken on a date!

Mine, I was having a social meet with a potential playmate. Every time I looked at him he would squirm and shift in his seat. After a while he was annoying me so I asked him what the matter was.

It turned out he had a butt plug in place and every time I looked at him he would squeeze it to excite himself, by the time he'd finished his starter he was ready to pop!

Another guy kept squeezing my thighs saying they were bigger than his so didn't think he could hold me down in a wrestle!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Another one that springs to mind lol

I met a guy and we was sat in a pub having a drink and a chat when his phone rings and he says to me, sorry its a woman im meeting tomorrow I not be a min, he answers the phone while walking out the pub, I could see him stood by the door talking, after 30 mins I decided this was taking the piss so I left, over half a hour after I left he called me up to see where I was, im assuming that's how much longer he was on the phone after I had left, so I told him if he thought I was sitting in a pub alone while hes talking to a future meet for over a hour he can think again, to which he replied he had finished now everything was sorted for their meet and could i come back

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By *orkscrew CurlsWoman  over a year ago

Loughborough Leics

I met a guy in a local bar, he asked me if I knew a nearby village, I said yes, and he sent a text. It was to his boss, and she invited us to go for a drink with her...and he agreed!

She was this butch lesbian, quite d*unk, and in a rough pub. We had a good laugh about strapons, with me trying not to drop him in it, even though he didn't know my real name, and he said she knew nothing of his hobby.

Later on all the local gays seemed to congregate there for a lock-in. I often see her about, not sure if she recognises me though.

I still see the man in question.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Brill replies so far glad its caught your imagination

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By *opsy RogersWoman  over a year ago

London

Strangest one for me so far was waiting for a bloke who lives in a neighbouring county, to get to me for a coffee social. I had to wait over an hour past our agreed time as he had got held up with various problems. Anyway, the last message I sent was to tell him I really did have to go and we will have to arrange to meet another time, when blow me down, he turned up! A single bloke who was telling the truth!

We've had some lovely meets since then.

#whodathoughtit

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Arranged a meet with a woman and she turned up with her 3month old baby as she "couldn't get a sitter" she actually wanted to play and said he had just been fed so would sleep through any noise!

couldn't beleive it!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Arranged a meet with a woman and she turned up with her 3month old baby as she "couldn't get a sitter" she actually wanted to play and said he had just been fed so would sleep through any noise!

couldn't beleive it!!"

ROFL

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Strangest one for me so far was waiting for a bloke who lives in a neighbouring county, to get to me for a coffee social. I had to wait over an hour past our agreed time as he had got held up with various problems. Anyway, the last message I sent was to tell him I really did have to go and we will have to arrange to meet another time, when blow me down, he turned up! A single bloke who was telling the truth!

We've had some lovely meets since then.

#whodathoughtit"

Not all us single guys are the same. Don't tar is all with the same brush!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Strangest one for me so far was waiting for a bloke who lives in a neighbouring county, to get to me for a coffee social. I had to wait over an hour past our agreed time as he had got held up with various problems. Anyway, the last message I sent was to tell him I really did have to go and we will have to arrange to meet another time, when blow me down, he turned up! A single bloke who was telling the truth!

We've had some lovely meets since then.

#whodathoughtit

Not all us single guys are the same. Don't tar is all with the same brush! "

she wasn't she was merely commentating as per my OP ..dont take it personal...or are you saying that every single meet you been on was perfect ??? if so please tell us your secrets lol

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By *opsy RogersWoman  over a year ago

London


"Strangest one for me so far was waiting for a bloke who lives in a neighbouring county, to get to me for a coffee social. I had to wait over an hour past our agreed time as he had got held up with various problems. Anyway, the last message I sent was to tell him I really did have to go and we will have to arrange to meet another time, when blow me down, he turned up! A single bloke who was telling the truth!

We've had some lovely meets since then.

#whodathoughtit

Not all us single guys are the same. Don't tar is all with the same brush!

she wasn't she was merely commentating as per my OP ..dont take it personal...or are you saying that every single meet you been on was perfect ??? if so please tell us your secrets lol "

It was very tongue in cheek as I can only think of two occasions that the bloke has not turned up. Most if not all, of my meets have been with single men and there are some I may not meet with again but I have been treated with respect and had a fantastic time with all of them.

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By *andg2Couple  over a year ago

Coventry

We had a meet where the couple turned up, hadn't eaten and were expecting us to cook for them (we'd previously said we'd have eaten before they would arrive) because they'd done this on a previous meet.

So we went out for a few drinks. After literally a couple of drinks, she was looking rather the worse for wear and was saying she had a headache, so we trotted back to ours.

She then disappeared off upstairs to bed with a headache. We'd had enough by this point so we buggered off to bed to have some fun on our own, leaving him downstairs.

He then preceeded to drink a whole large bottle of our Vodka and finally stumbled upstairs. At around 1.00am we suddenly became aware of this very d*unk chap literally falling into our bedroom, flopping on our bed. In this state he was a dead weight and it took both of us to drag him off the bed and into his own room.

In the morning we went downstairs to discover one of our oven dishes full of vomit

What made it worse was they then got pissed off at us for not wanting to meet them again!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Strangest one for me so far was waiting for a bloke who lives in a neighbouring county, to get to me for a coffee social. I had to wait over an hour past our agreed time as he had got held up with various problems. Anyway, the last message I sent was to tell him I really did have to go and we will have to arrange to meet another time, when blow me down, he turned up! A single bloke who was telling the truth!

We've had some lovely meets since then.

#whodathoughtit

Not all us single guys are the same. Don't tar is all with the same brush! "

i think you'll find she was being ironic

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We had a meet where the couple turned up, hadn't eaten and were expecting us to cook for them (we'd previously said we'd have eaten before they would arrive) because they'd done this on a previous meet.

So we went out for a few drinks. After literally a couple of drinks, she was looking rather the worse for wear and was saying she had a headache, so we trotted back to ours.

She then disappeared off upstairs to bed with a headache. We'd had enough by this point so we buggered off to bed to have some fun on our own, leaving him downstairs.

He then preceeded to drink a whole large bottle of our Vodka and finally stumbled upstairs. At around 1.00am we suddenly became aware of this very d*unk chap literally falling into our bedroom, flopping on our bed. In this state he was a dead weight and it took both of us to drag him off the bed and into his own room.

In the morning we went downstairs to discover one of our oven dishes full of vomit

What made it worse was they then got pissed off at us for not wanting to meet them again! "

genius

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was seriously caught off guard this day.

I arranged to meet a female at a travelodge (I know, classy) nr Stoke, we'd chatted a fair bit and seemed to be getting on well. Her husband was dropping her off and was ok with this, as I spoke to him too.

I parked up in the car park, they parked up at the other end nr the exit. (ok most of you are ahead of where my brain was at that day already)

Anyway we met in the middle, she said she knew the receptionist, if I gave her the room money, she'd go in and pay and get ready, then let me know which room she was in, wait in my car, if I held on to her bag of drinks and toys (which turned out to be bottles of water).

As I turned to walk back to my car, she jumped in with her husband and they took off like scalded cats, whilst I was some distance from my car.

I did get my own back, I searched for her mobile number and she was advertising on various free sites as a masseuse and prostitute, she also had it listed in the phone directory as a music teacher, with her home address.

I sent her to that hotel and a few others several times after that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again "

Did they get back to you ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Did they get back to you ? "

Yes they said they had decided to not meet again as they didn't feel like we was taking things serious

But then he did ask me what I would do in return if he mrs went down on me and my reply was...depends how good she was

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By *reelove1969Couple  over a year ago

bristol


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again "

priceless !!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Did they get back to you ?

Yes they said they had decided to not meet again as they didn't feel like we was taking things serious

But then he did ask me what I would do in return if he mrs went down on me and my reply was...depends how good she was "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again "

You wait, it'll come up as a Family Fortunes question one day. "we asked 100 swingers..."

It was secret market research, you clearly didn't realise at the time.

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By *anetandNickCouple  over a year ago

Ross-on-Wye

We very rarely get bad meets these days. But when we were less experienced, things were not always quite so smooth.

We were once invited to a party in a nearby town. The hosts turned out to be wardens at an old peoples home. They had the idea that they would use the common room for the party, after they'd put all the old dears to bed. We all sat around in a semicircle of very upright chairs, wondering exactly what the funny smell was, and trying to think of good excuses to leave as quickly as possible. (It always helps to know the local dogging spots - a cold wet woodland can be more comfortable than some party venues.)

Another strange party was at a single guy's bungalow. It was very untidy inside and we all sat around awkwardly making stilted conversation. Eventually, our host got up and fed the cat - ah! that's what the smell was.

Another single guy had a very nice tidy home - but he had the telly on some cooking channel, and instead of an orgy, all the guys sat drooling over Nigella Lawson. Actually, after we'd given him some quiet advice, he held several other very successful parties.

We once went to a great party at a couples house. As usual, there were lots of little piles of clothes strewn around. The couple had a delightful new kitten, and unfortunately several girls later found their best knickers ripped to shreds.

Happy Swinging!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

really?what an asshole!!

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I've had a couple of bad meets, but only one really weirdly bad.

Arranged to meet a guy for a MMF in Leeds. We had already discussed booking a hotel but because it was a school holiday and short notice there were no hotels available, so then he said his cousins house was free. I got to Leeds station, and waited. And waited. Eventually he turned up 40 mins late, got out the car and told me another cousin was having problems and he had to go and help out but would meet me at the other guys house.

Trouble was the other guys house was no longer available so me and this guy I didn't know from Adam ended up driving round Leeds for a while, trying to find somewhere to go. We went to a petrol station to get some booze and I sat in the car for 30 mins while the other guy spoke on his mobile. When he finally got back in the car I asked to be taken back to the station.

Guy then rings the first guy (the one I had arranged the meet with) who spent 10 mins trying to talk me out of going home, and promising to book a nice hotel. When I reminded him we had tried that he gave up and I went home, two hours after arriving, shag-free and very unhappy. Never even got an apology.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My funniest, looming back now was when I was meeting an older woman in Watford. I got lost in the one way system so called her. She asked where I was and said shed drive past in x car in a few minutes. So I waited until I saw x car and followed and followed and pulled up outside a house, she got out and I thought she looked different to her photos when my phone rang.... Id followed the wrong woman home.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind lol

I met a guy and we was sat in a pub having a drink and a chat when his phone rings and he says to me, sorry its a woman im meeting tomorrow I not be a min, he answers the phone while walking out the pub, I could see him stood by the door talking, after 30 mins I decided this was taking the piss so I left, over half a hour after I left he called me up to see where I was, im assuming that's how much longer he was on the phone after I had left, so I told him if he thought I was sitting in a pub alone while hes talking to a future meet for over a hour he can think again, to which he replied he had finished now everything was sorted for their meet and could i come back "

bloody cheek of him

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By *umbriaman1962Man  over a year ago

outside of penrith

one of my funniest was with my first wife before internet dating, we had swapped letter sent to box nos out of swinging mag then pics with this couple over a few weeks , then said we would meet at there house , when we got there there had a 7 week old baby that she was breast feeding.

when we swwap first letter baby could hardly have been born, funny thing was there went onto be good friends we meet ever couple months for next few years

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We were once invited to a party in a nearby town. The hosts turned out to be wardens at an old peoples home. They had the idea that they would use the common room for the party, after they'd put all the old dears to bed. We all sat around in a semicircle of very upright chairs, wondering exactly what the funny smell was, and trying to think of good excuses to leave as quickly as possible. (It always helps to know the local dogging spots - a cold wet woodland can be more comfortable than some party venues.)"

OMG I had to read that twice to make sure I read it right

I can not believe someone would use a old people home for swinging, what a total abuse of trust

Just when you think nothing else can shock you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love some of the stories here

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My first ever meet off here

arranged to go to a single females flat. She gave me the code to get in the door and told me to do a secret knock.

After knocking a voice asked me who I was I replied by telling her who I was.

She then asked me to hold my driving licence up to the peep hole for her to see.

I though fair enough she must be very worried incase I wasn't who I said I was then to my surprise she then said your not the same person bye.

After a minute of standing there shocked I turned and left, on returning home I got an email off her asking why I diddnt show. I told her what happend and she told me she got the wrong picture up and asked me to then drive back!!!!

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By *ezebelWoman  over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest


"My first ever meet off here

arranged to go to a single females flat. She gave me the code to get in the door and told me to do a secret knock.

After knocking a voice asked me who I was I replied by telling her who I was.

She then asked me to hold my driving licence up to the peep hole for her to see.

I though fair enough she must be very worried incase I wasn't who I said I was then to my surprise she then said your not the same person bye.

After a minute of standing there shocked I turned and left, on returning home I got an email off her asking why I diddnt show. I told her what happend and she told me she got the wrong picture up and asked me to then drive back!!!!"

And did you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was talking to the ex earlier and he reminded me of another which for some reason I forgot lol

Again years ago when still married me and the ex met this couple and they turned up at our house and without being rude they was rough, really scruffy and to be blunt smelly, anyway we invited them in, took one look at each other and did the, quick drink and get them out code

So we made them a drink and we had a chat, the whole time trying to be polite and not make it obvious the smell coming from them was really quite bad

Anyway she got onto the conversation of wall papering the bathroom and how the paper wouldn't stick round the loo as he had a bad aim and kept peeing up the wall and how it was now all damp THEN as if that wasn't inappropriate conversation enough he started tell us about the stool sample he took to the doctors and went into great detail about how he had to shit in a dish so he could cut a bit off to put in the tube

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As a teenager I met a blind date. She got into my car and from a distance she looked slim and attractive. But up close I realised that she was looking at me in a very strange way and I deduced she was what might now be called care in the community. I felt really uncomfortable about the situation as she asked strange questions. Then her little brother turned up being nosy and started walking round the car. She asked me to give her a lift to the corner shop. When I got there she pleaded with me not to drive off while she was in the shop and I had to promise her I wouldn't.

I left half the tyres on the road wheel spinning away

I told a mate afterwards about my close shave and he laughed replying "you should have fucked her, then her sister, then her mum and then came straight down the clap clinic with me"

Apparently the whole house was at it with anyone and everyone

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ive never had a bad exerience while ive been on here in 5 years. Ive never had a timewaster, or a no show and every meet has gone really well and smoothly.

Have had one really funny one. This is quite a few years ago. Guy came to my house and we sat chatting for a while, went upstairs and started to play and he was fisting me, i came really hard and clamped my thighs round his arm. He let out the most almighy noise and when he released his arm it was hanging all limp and he was moaning in pain.

Id dislocated his wrist. Last i saw of him was heading out the door to AE saying he would come back. Strangely i never heard from him again lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again "

they didn't work for sydney university did they?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A while ago I met this tall slim blonde and we got it together. She was really sexy, willing and made me feel very horny.

When it came time to repay her early favours with some pussy licking I noticed something odd; she had no clit. Not being a total sexual novice I asked if she had had a sex change.

She said she had had gender reassignment and apologised for not saying. There was a few moments thought and we continued to a pleasant conclusion but it has to rank as one of my strangest encounters. It is however not one I would wish to repeat as a straight man.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

I did similar in my single days one girl I met was over 6 foot and had massive heels with a shift dress ( I hate them) took one look and sorry its not going to happen 300 or so texts later giving me abuse she gave up

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By *anetandNickCouple  over a year ago

Ross-on-Wye

We remembered a few other amusing evenings...

Some years ago, a well-known club owning couple probably familiar to many of you, used to run parties at a much smaller venue. From time to time, to make for a bigger party, they would organise hotel takeover weekends, which were very good fun.

One weekend we were down at such an event at Weston-Super-Mud. A big self-contained function suite had been hired, and everything was going swingingly. Unfortunately, another function suite had been hired by the local cricket club. Half way through the evening, one of the rather inebriated cricketers got lost on the way to the loo, and wandered into the middle of a full scale orgy. We gently ushered him back through the right door - but after that there was a steady stream of "lost" cricketers for the rest of the evening. Then in the morning, we woke up to see waves crashing over our car, which was parked on the seafront. It was never quite the same again.

At another event, in Birmingham, there was a lovely swimming pool, beautifully illuminated, just outside the french windows of the function room. It was cordoned off with "no swimming after dark" notices. However, one lady wasn't having any of this health 'n' safety nonsense and jumped in. The hotel staff were in total panic. She was hauled out instantly and buckets of water thrown over her. It turned out they'd filled the pool with some noxious cleaning chemical. Fortunately she wasn't in for long and no harm done.

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By *nfieldishCouple  over a year ago

Enfield

Had a girl when I was a single.......lovely lovely lady....was doing it doggy style.....had hold of her arm to get more thrust.....her arm fell off....true story...

She had a silk shirt on....I didn't know she had no arm....

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Had a girl when I was a single.......lovely lovely lady....was doing it doggy style.....had hold of her arm to get more thrust.....her arm fell off....true story...

She had a silk shirt on....I didn't know she had no arm....

"

That is the second funniest thread ive read on all the years ive been on here

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had a girl when I was a single.......lovely lovely lady....was doing it doggy style.....had hold of her arm to get more thrust.....her arm fell off....true story...

She had a silk shirt on....I didn't know she had no arm....

Sorry I shouldn't laugh

"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again

they didn't work for sydney university did they? "

ROFPMSL!!!!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Another one that springs to mind, ive been doing this for 12 years now so I have a few lol

Many years ago when I was married and I used to meet with my ex we met a couple, invited them to our house for a drink and a chat etc

Anyway they turned up and we invited them in, offered them a drink, as you do, when we was all sorted and all sat down the guy from the couple opened a bag he had bought and pulled out a folder with a sheet of pre written questions which he proceed to start asking us and then started writing our answers down after a few drinks and a sheet of questions later they left saying as they went, it was nice to meet us but they would be going home and talking thro our replies and would let us know if they wanted to meet again

they didn't work for sydney university did they?

ROFPMSL!!!!!!!!!!! "

im going back about 10/11 years there, I don't think such things was about in those days

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/03/13 14:04:43]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

These stories are hilarious really made me chuckle

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had a girl when I was a single.......lovely lovely lady....was doing it doggy style.....had hold of her arm to get more thrust.....her arm fell off....true story...

She had a silk shirt on....I didn't know she had no arm....

"

There is so much more I want to know about this story. How on earth did you deal with that ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Back in the day when i used to meet guys sometimes off a different website, we had a lovely meet but the guy cudnt fine his shoes after. We hunted hi and low it was most mysterious. Eventually i checked the other bedrooms altho wed not been into them and found both his shoes well chewed on the bed. To this day i dont know how my chihuahua managed to carry not one but 2 size 12 trainers up the stairs. I was absolutely mortified as he informed me they were brand new too :-/ oops

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Our very first swing was a six some .

I spent most of my time with a French Gymnast and Mrs J was with a young guy who worked for DHL , so as a Royal Mail posty she was literally screwing the competition !!.

The host was the only one who kept anything on as we all ended up naked except him with his jeans on.

On the way home I remarked on this fact to which Mrs J replied "oh , he had a wooden leg " .

That explained that one then .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Our very first swing was a six some .

I spent most of my time with a French Gymnast and Mrs J was with a young guy who worked for DHL , so as a Royal Mail posty she was literally screwing the competition !!.

The host was the only one who kept anything on as we all ended up naked except him with his jeans on.

On the way home I remarked on this fact to which Mrs J replied "oh , he had a wooden leg " .

That explained that one then ."

yeah viagra will do that to ya - so I've been told!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Our very first swing was a six some .

I spent most of my time with a French Gymnast and Mrs J was with a young guy who worked for DHL , so as a Royal Mail posty she was literally screwing the competition !!.

The host was the only one who kept anything on as we all ended up naked except him with his jeans on.

On the way home I remarked on this fact to which Mrs J replied "oh , he had a wooden leg " .

That explained that one then .

yeah viagra will do that to ya - so I've been told!"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/03/13 18:12:39]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/03/13 18:13:52]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have never had a bad meet yet but none of them was on this site my first meet on this site is on Saturday lets hope my luck continues

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By *ornieandhotCouple  over a year ago

Peterborough

We had a guy dislocate his knee once that was a little embarrassing thankfully I managed to put it back for him

D x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We had a guy dislocate his knee once that was a little embarrassing thankfully I managed to put it back for him

D x "

Ouch

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple  over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

had a meet cpl of weeks ago where the mrs dressed up stockings ect met hotel drink off to room where she put on a toyshow for the fella he was fucking her when his phone kept going off he kept getting off answer phone happened a few times till the mrs got up told him " look cant be doing this the moment has gone sorry" thing is we were recording the meet , mrs wernt impressed but when we watched it few days later we had a right giggle owa it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

But your gorgeous, was he blind !

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By *am123Man  over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

that actually made me laugh out loud awwww

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We had a guy dislocate his knee once that was a little embarrassing thankfully I managed to put it back for him

D x "

OUCH!

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By *pecifically1Woman  over a year ago

Hull

This has to be one of the funniest threads I have ever read!

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By *orroHoodMan  over a year ago

London


"My funniest almost meet was a guy I had been talking to, we arranged to meet and I turned up in arranged meeting place and waited for him, he pulled up infront of me, looked at me and just drove off

"

He must've been off his trolley!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i met this cpl at theres we sat on settee wife in middle i start kissing her playing with her tits sucking me next thing her hubby stripping her then all of a sudden she pulls her faulse leg off, she laying there spread eagle with 1 leg ready for a gd pounding, i didnt no where to look they could of told me lol, managed to hold it together n get the job done tho

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By *leepyangelCouple  over a year ago

over the hill and far away

I met a guy who had asked me not to wear deodorant and whilst in the throes of passion wanted to lick my armpits. Very off putting whilst riding his cock!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I met a guy who had asked me not to wear deodorant and whilst in the throes of passion wanted to lick my armpits. Very off putting whilst riding his cock!"
lol bet it tickled haha, x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

This is d funniest thread ever im in stiches

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By *ob and angelaCouple  over a year ago

glasgow

we met a cpl at their house when we first started swinging,getting along good & haveing a few drinks when he asked ang to go upstairs so her could show her his fishing tackle(lol) ang took hom on thinking it was getting hot when infact that is all he done,show her his fishing tackle & the fishing flies he had made,put a bit of a dampner on the nite lol......

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

On one of my first meets off here i met with a Lovely girl who lived almost an hour away. She drove to see me so I booked us a hotel, took her out for a meal then on to see a brill band who were some mates of mine. Great evening full of drinks, laughs and innuendos.

Took her back to the hotel, literally ripping each others clothes off in the lift, get to the room and she goes down on me, she was sucking me for a while, then stopped briefly and was wanking me til i felt what i thought was her spitting on my cock.....turns out she was actually having a nose bleed.....All over me.....needless to say i was a perfect gentleman, got her some tissue and jumped in the shower....she was still bleeding when i got out lol must have gone on for nearly an hour....but we had lots of fun after

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