FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > First time attending club!
First time attending club!
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
First time attending a club for me! I’m going solo! I have no idea what I’m setting myself up for! Going to be very vulnerable in a set of boxers lol
Any thoughts or tips are appreciated! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Don't follow people around, but do ask people who are sat if you can join them for a chat. Introduce yourself, let them get to know you, ask what they are looking for. Don't be pushy.
If it was us and we liked the look of you we may ask you to join us. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Nice thank you! I’d never follow someone around like a puppy (not into that kink lol).
Hoping there’s a bar there which I can sit at until I see someone who catches my eye or I catch theirs! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Don’t start wanking in front of me (or any lady for that matter) the changing room when I’m getting undressed would be my suggestion 
I took a dim view on the moron that did…. "
Jesus that's a new low... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"First time attending a club for me! I’m going solo! I have no idea what I’m setting myself up for! Going to be very vulnerable in a set of boxers lol
Any thoughts or tips are appreciated! "
Take it easy, don't put pressure on yourself, treat people like they are people and chat. We like chatters and have played with people quite often that we have just started chatting with |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Don’t start wanking in front of me (or any lady for that matter) the changing room when I’m getting undressed would be my suggestion
I took a dim view on the moron that did….
Jesus that's a new low..."
He actually had the balls (pardon the pun) to wink at me whilst doing it. Was tempting to give him a closer view of a 6 inch heel, but i didnt  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
He actually had the balls (pardon the pun) to wink at me whilst doing it. Was tempting to give him a closer view of a 6 inch heel, but i didnt "
That’s horrid! Sorry that some people are so slimey  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Take it easy, don't put pressure on yourself, treat people like they are people and chat. We like chatters and have played with people quite often that we have just started chatting with "
Thank you  that’s how I’d look to approach the evening |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We think it's best to go with no expectation of sex & get to know the place.
I agree just go up to people introduce yourself and tell them it's your first visit to a club, most people will be really chilled and if nothing else will chat.
Just as a hint me and the Mrs went into one of the I will call it open or public play rooms (some lock for shy people or privacy)
A chap come in and just stood close by but giving us space & simply the fact that he showed respect got him a BJ from my Mrs,
Nothing wrong with watching in a public area or play room and you never know if you will get lucky
Have fun |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If you go to a pub and you prefer to be a wallflower then a club will be absolutely no different.
You have to have some personality at a club and be prepared to chat to people.
Be polite - whilst someone might not ask you to play at that time, they may come back later on, another night.
It’s like anything, get your face seen by people, show some personality and people will warm to you.
Sit at the bar waiting for something to happen, it probably won’t.
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
He actually had the balls (pardon the pun) to wink at me whilst doing it. Was tempting to give him a closer view of a 6 inch heel, but i didnt
That’s horrid! Sorry that some people are so slimey "
You will often see a conga line of what we refer to as the “desperate wankers” who follow couples like lemmings if they make a move for a play room. If you want to stick out in a good way, dont join the end of the queue |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We think it's best to go with no expectation of sex & get to know the place.
I agree just go up to people introduce yourself and tell them it's your first visit to a club, most people will be really chilled and if nothing else will chat.
Just as a hint me and the Mrs went into one of the I will call it open or public play rooms (some lock for shy people or privacy)
A chap come in and just stood close by but giving us space & simply the fact that he showed respect got him a BJ from my Mrs,
Nothing wrong with watching in a public area or play room and you never know if you will get lucky
Have fun "
Wicked thanks mate
In honesty for my first venture I’m unsure if I want to play straight away and like you say just get to know the place and hopefully meet some new people with potential!
Oh absolutely nothing but respect for everyone there
Appreciated  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
You will often see a conga line of what we refer to as the “desperate wankers” who follow couples like lemmings if they make a move for a play room. If you want to stick out in a good way, dont join the end of the queue "
Urgh! Lol noted thank you! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Pretty much everything other people have said.
Dont go with any expectations.
Dont follow people around.
Don’t stand or sit playing with yourself.
Don’t sit at the bar staring at people waiting for them to come to the bar.
Do talk to people and expect a polite no from them but some will chat and see how it goes from there.
Feel free to watch in a public play room but don’t expect to join unless invited.
Don’t touch unless invited.
Respect personal space.
Remember if it’s a couple, talk to them both.
Above all, relax, mingle and have a fun evening. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Pretty much everything other people have said.
Dont go with any expectations.
Dont follow people around.
Don’t stand or sit playing with yourself.
Don’t sit at the bar staring at people waiting for them to come to the bar.
Do talk to people and expect a polite no from them but some will chat and see how it goes from there.
Feel free to watch in a public play room but don’t expect to join unless invited.
Don’t touch unless invited.
Respect personal space.
Remember if it’s a couple, talk to them both.
Above all, relax, mingle and have a fun evening. "
Lush thank you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
You will often see a conga line of what we refer to as the “desperate wankers” who follow couples like lemmings if they make a move for a play room. If you want to stick out in a good way, dont join the end of the queue
Urgh! Lol noted thank you! "
Youve got me started on pet hates now. The other is single men thinking as they've paid it is somehow an entitlement.
I was happily chatting to my partner and a man asked what time we were “starting” and almost expected an apology that i wasn’t performing  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Youve got me started on pet hates now. The other is single men thinking as they've paid it is somehow an entitlement.
I was happily chatting to my partner and a man asked what time we were “starting” and almost expected an apology that i wasn’t performing "
That’s grim! 
Like they’re owed something! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Also in clubs where its not instant dress down code turn up in a high viz and safety boots, hands covered in oil (true story) and expect to make a good impression, and do not talk to the male half of the couple like i’m a camel you can barter over
Dress to impress and have some basic manners and youll be half way there |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Also in clubs where its not instant dress down code turn up in a high viz and safety boots, hands covered in oil (true story) and expect to make a good impression, and do not talk to the male half of the couple like i’m a camel you can barter over
Dress to impress and have some basic manners and youll be half way there "
Wow!!!! These guys expect to get anywhere like this??? What’s wrong with them!?
This event is shorts or a towel and I plan on arriving very clean lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Also in clubs where its not instant dress down code turn up in a high viz and safety boots, hands covered in oil (true story) and expect to make a good impression, and do not talk to the male half of the couple like i’m a camel you can barter over
Dress to impress and have some basic manners and youll be half way there
Wow!!!! These guys expect to get anywhere like this??? What’s wrong with them!?
This event is shorts or a towel and I plan on arriving very clean lol "
And have something nice to say. A man wouldn't look me in the eye, Ignored me and simply said to my better half, with no preamble or introduction “can I have a go of your missus”
I despair sometimes in these places.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Also in clubs where its not instant dress down code turn up in a high viz and safety boots, hands covered in oil (true story) and expect to make a good impression, and do not talk to the male half of the couple like i’m a camel you can barter over
Dress to impress and have some basic manners and youll be half way there
Wow!!!! These guys expect to get anywhere like this??? What’s wrong with them!?
This event is shorts or a towel and I plan on arriving very clean lol
And have something nice to say. A man wouldn't look me in the eye, Ignored me and simply said to my better half, with no preamble or introduction “can I have a go of your missus”
I despair sometimes in these places.
"
Honestly, it is these type of people who are making such a bad name for the actual good ones, even just like on here. For instance it makes trying to approach someone new super hard because out of 10 men there’s probably nine dickheads |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Take condoms that fit you. Inviting a man to play and then having the “yes you need to rubber up. What you didn’t bring any?” Is awkward and leads to a really hard stop and can affect others in the room. Lube is also always welcome. When asked to rubber up don’t act like a toddler being asked to put a jacket on over a Halloween costume. The same goes if the lady asks you to rubber up for oral. We don’t fancy getting infections in the throat. Yes it is possible and absolutely does happen.
Speak with both parties not just the woman. The man is sharing his most precious person, respect them. Just because they enjoy this, does not mean that they are inferior or that they don’t please the woman. Don’t ask if we’re female.
Don’t steal our knickers, or stockings. Yes this has happened. More than once.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Also in clubs where its not instant dress down code turn up in a high viz and safety boots, hands covered in oil (true story) and expect to make a good impression, and do not talk to the male half of the couple like i’m a camel you can barter over
Dress to impress and have some basic manners and youll be half way there
Wow!!!! These guys expect to get anywhere like this??? What’s wrong with them!?
This event is shorts or a towel and I plan on arriving very clean lol
And have something nice to say. A man wouldn't look me in the eye, Ignored me and simply said to my better half, with no preamble or introduction “can I have a go of your missus”
I despair sometimes in these places.
Honestly, it is these type of people who are making such a bad name for the actual good ones, even just like on here. For instance it makes trying to approach someone new super hard because out of 10 men there’s probably nine dickheads "
Look at it the other way. There likely to be no competition if you stand out for a good way, as most wont! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Take condoms that fit you. Inviting a man to play and then having the “yes you need to rubber up. What you didn’t bring any?” Is awkward and leads to a really hard stop and can affect others in the room. Lube is also always welcome. When asked to rubber up don’t act like a toddler being asked to put a jacket on over a Halloween costume. The same goes if the lady asks you to rubber up for oral. We don’t fancy getting infections in the throat. Yes it is possible and absolutely does happen.
Speak with both parties not just the woman. The man is sharing his most precious person, respect them. Just because they enjoy this, does not mean that they are inferior or that they don’t please the woman. Don’t ask if we’re female.
Don’t steal our knickers, or stockings. Yes this has happened. More than once.
"
I’ve always and will use my own condoms the toddler jacket made me laugh! (I’ve got kids!)
I absolutely understand you, I couldn’t and wouldn’t expect anything to happen at all without speaking to both parties! That’s just insane that people would! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Don’t start wanking in front of me (or any lady for that matter) the changing room when I’m getting undressed would be my suggestion
I took a dim view on the moron that did….
Jesus that's a new low...
He actually had the balls (pardon the pun) to wink at me whilst doing it. Was tempting to give him a closer view of a 6 inch heel, but i didnt "
Definitely should have done we think! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It sounds like you've got the basics down, which is pretty much just about being a respectful, decent, freindly person. Which I used to think was a patronising veiw point to say until time and experience shown me that not everone is like this. If you have this nailed (and by your responses I think you do) half the battle is done.
I think some people neglect the practical to their own peril and distress. So do your research. Find out about the club, what to wear, what to bring, transport, is it bring your own drink, cash or card etc?
I'm not going to patronise you with be clean, brush your teeth, smell good etc.
I think you sound as set up as you need to be. Just try to relax and go with an open mind. There's not much I can say to prepare you. It may not be how you expect and all I can say it take it in your stride. Fear not that everything won't go to plan and sometimes you maybe be poliety (hopefully) turned down. We can't be what everyone is looking for on that night. Just take everything with charm and good humour. Hopefully you'll find your way and a good night (whatever happens). But sink or swim you really can't know until you try. So go, see and hopefully enjoy.
Mr
(From the POV of my own experience at clubs as single guy and experience single guys from a couples POV)
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It sounds like you've got the basics down, which is pretty much just about being a respectful, decent, freindly person. Which I used to think was a patronising veiw point to say until time and experience shown me that not everone is like this. If you have this nailed (and by your responses I think you do) half the battle is done.
I think some people neglect the practical to their own peril and distress. So do your research. Find out about the club, what to wear, what to bring, transport, is it bring your own drink, cash or card etc?
I'm not going to patronise you with be clean, brush your teeth, smell good etc.
I think you sound as set up as you need to be. Just try to relax and go with an open mind. There's not much I can say to prepare you. It may not be how you expect and all I can say it take it in your stride. Fear not that everything won't go to plan and sometimes you maybe be poliety (hopefully) turned down. We can't be what everyone is looking for on that night. Just take everything with charm and good humour. Hopefully you'll find your way and a good night (whatever happens). But sink or swim you really can't know until you try. So go, see and hopefully enjoy.
Mr
(From the POV of my own experience at clubs as single guy and experience single guys from a couples POV)
"
Thank you mate! All of the above is spot on! I’ve already spoke to a friend and found out all the details of drink and changing rooms and attire! Otherwise from your post I would now be checking!
I think we’re good to go! for most of the responses on here it’s about just being a general nice human and a respectful one which should absolutely just be the norm anyway!
Thank you all for the responses! It’s very much appreciated! Can’t wait to get there now!
And hopefully steer clear of all of the bellends that have been mentioned! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
My other half swears by taking some neoprene shoes (like the wet suit things)
Carpets can be manky, floors slippy, dungeon rooms give you frostbitten toes and the perils of heels standing on bare feet.
We worth considering |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"My other half swears by taking some neoprene shoes (like the wet suit things)
Carpets can be manky, floors slippy, dungeon rooms give you frostbitten toes and the perils of heels standing on bare feet.
We worth considering "
Ooooosh yeh defo worth considering something! Can you wear a flip flop? Lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If you have feet like a gruffalo, no.
Otherwise i suppose so "
Haa a gruffalo! Hairy with claws?! Mine are just normal feet, trim nails and no hair haha |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I recently went as a not that good looking or well hung guy on my own to an event at Cupid's on a lunchtime sat down and started chatting to a couple for a while and ended up being invited to join them ended up giving her oral and hoping to meet her again. Expect nothing be friendly and you will be ok |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I recently went as a not that good looking or well hung guy on my own to an event at Cupid's on a lunchtime sat down and started chatting to a couple for a while and ended up being invited to join them ended up giving her oral and hoping to meet her again. Expect nothing be friendly and you will be ok "
Thank you mate I will be exactly that I’m going to expect for nothing! I’m just really looking forward to experiencing it now and hopefully being the start of something new! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"First time attending a club for me! I’m going solo! I have no idea what I’m setting myself up for! Going to be very vulnerable in a set of boxers lol
Any thoughts or tips are appreciated! "
100% talk to people in the social area (if there is one) gives you a face to approach in the 'action' areas if need be, our 1st time we ended p playing with the people we'd initially spoken to downstairs, abit of familiarity goes along way. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
100% talk to people in the social area (if there is one) gives you a face to approach in the 'action' areas if need be, our 1st time we ended p playing with the people we'd initially spoken to downstairs, abit of familiarity goes along way. "
Aww amazing! I don’t really know what rooms there will be but that’s a really good tip thanks!
I did see someone in another forum mention asking for a tour to check the place out. Now this could either highlight me as a newbie or look a right plonker lol any views? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
100% talk to people in the social area (if there is one) gives you a face to approach in the 'action' areas if need be, our 1st time we ended p playing with the people we'd initially spoken to downstairs, abit of familiarity goes along way.
Aww amazing! I don’t really know what rooms there will be but that’s a really good tip thanks!
I did see someone in another forum mention asking for a tour to check the place out. Now this could either highlight me as a newbie or look a right plonker lol any views? "
I wouldn't say thats necessary, looks completely different anyway with loads of people milling about in there, just follow a lead and then make your own decisions when your comfortable. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"?
I wouldn't say thats necessary, looks completely different anyway with loads of people milling about in there, just follow a lead and then make your own decisions when your comfortable. "
Amazing! The host just offered me to be added to a telegram group so I can start chatting with people before the event |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
