FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Guys in couples feeling sidelined
Guys in couples feeling sidelined
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How common is it for the M half of a couple to feel sidelined by other couples?
We are quite new and trying to build connections initially but feel like most chats are predominantly with the M half of another couple and the F half says nothing or almost nothing...
The Mr is getting a bit frustrated as he wants to be involved and have someone to chat to and flirt with too...
Have we just been unlucky or is this pretty normal? |
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By *wing2meCouple
over a year ago
Coventry |
We're a pretty 50/50 couple profile in respects that Mrs S spends about as much time as me on here. Always welcome to send a message and Mrs S is always up for a chat, she loves detailed fantasies so if he's a little horny and wants do to do x, y z then by all means the more the better, more labido to come my way after it all. As you probably know yourself theres an absolute ton of messages that come through from Male profiles but I'll give her a nudge to respond to him  and of course I (Mr S) is happy to message your other half if she wants |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How common is it for the M half of a couple to feel sidelined by other couples?
We are quite new and trying to build connections initially but feel like most chats are predominantly with the M half of another couple and the F half says nothing or almost nothing...
The Mr is getting a bit frustrated as he wants to be involved and have someone to chat to and flirt with too...
Have we just been unlucky or is this pretty normal?"
We would chat with you both |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
"How common is it for the M half of a couple to feel sidelined by other couples?
We are quite new and trying to build connections initially but feel like most chats are predominantly with the M half of another couple and the F half says nothing or almost nothing...
The Mr is getting a bit frustrated as he wants to be involved and have someone to chat to and flirt with too...
Have we just been unlucky or is this pretty normal?"
Maybe move to a video / phone chat with anyone you are interested in? Fab message flirting is something that not everyone is interested in, and to be honest it isn’t going to tell you much about whether there is an attraction there anyway compared with visibly speaking to someone, so you may find it more productive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most couples are looking for girls. Also couples don’t show enough pictures, if any on their profile, so people gravitate to what they can see. Swinging as a couple is difficult unless you are looking for guys, but that can be hard work too. |
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It was a fear we had as well, so we do a couple of messages and then we move to a group chat on an agreed platform so then everyone can talk, if they don't want to do that for us it's a red flag as there's enough services out there now where you don't need to exchange numbers so can keep it private |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't get involved with couples where that's the case. We found that this happened when we met couples socially too. If the woman is reticent it's a warning sign"
This  |
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By *archelCouple
over a year ago
A field somewhere |
We've had this issue from day dot. Although once other couples find out I'm straight and won't entertain bi play they bugger off lol
We get it both on here and in the clubs, he's treated like the spare wheel..in them cases we step away from such couples. Wife snatching is real 
Mrs M |
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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago
Baughurst |
Have you actually asked them if they BOTH like flirt chat? It's normal that one half is not interested in that kind of chat, or that does not participate in Fab.
He is not necessarily sidelined, unless both M and F love to flirt-chat with you OP, but blatantly avoid him.
So the most likely reasons are that one half, the female, does not like flirt chat or they are not a genuine MF couple, just a male pretending and enjoying chatting to you and getting a wank at your expense.
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By *orl1971Couple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
It’s amazing the number of conclusions people jump to with so little information. On our profile it’s me, Mr, who does the admin. Mrs can’t be bothered with flirty chat as from experience it often leads nowhere.
We get to a social as quickly as possible then you can judge face to face whether anyone is reticent or not.
Thinking if the female isn’t chatting then they’re not a real couple is frankly rubbish. Different people run profiles differently. |
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Easy really.. just go to some clubs and socialise. Youndojt even have to dress down in most clubs of ya don't want to.
Meeting couples at clubs is tge best way . It's like finding a needle ina haystack on here looking for the ideal couple as most profiles are led by the male. Lucky if you come across a profile where both interact |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s amazing the number of conclusions people jump to with so little information. On our profile it’s me, Mr, who does the admin. Mrs can’t be bothered with flirty chat as from experience it often leads nowhere.
We get to a social as quickly as possible then you can judge face to face whether anyone is reticent or not.
Thinking if the female isn’t chatting then they’re not a real couple is frankly rubbish. Different people run profiles differently. "
Fair and valid points.
Also depends on the dynamic |
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We don’t do flirty chat online and Mr does the Fabmin. We move to a real life social meet quickly (when childcare can be arranged) if we feel we are compatible. We are looking, first and foremost, for couples whose company we will enjoy in and out of bed. It works for us. I guess we all do things in different ways. |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
as a couple your in control so that means if your both in a solid relationship you would not allow another couple to do this the fem half of the man being pushed out should stop and say no more ..... your in control so control it be blunt stop the meet and get rid of the couples.... your allowing it by allowing them ..
ive said before if your soft couple who wont say no then people will walk all over you it dont matter if your a man woman or couple there are couples and men / women on here and the scene who thrive on weak to get what they want ...be bold be blunt and stand up to them |
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Luna rarely answers messages (she does read everything and gives me her input) she's not a fan of the whole online thing so I tend to do most of that fabmin, however in person she's the chatty one and I can't get a word in edgeways.
Mr H |
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By *SCouple81Couple
over a year ago
Between Edinburgh and Scottish Borders |
We are both involved but it's Mrs who does most of writing, with exception of the forum. She really enjoys sexy, flirty chat and I can't be bothered with that. I feel better on face to face meetings. We didn't experience me being left behind during the play meets as we usually just go for a swap. But as always, communication is the key and if anyone is feeling uncomfortable should discuss it with their partner. It can be difficult sometimes, specially if it's happening during the play but on most of the time you can have a good feeling during the first meeting. That's why we usually have a social first and can talk about it before making any decision. |
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