FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Double standards on weight
Double standards on weight
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening |
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Not a single guy but can imagine how hard it is in here for one but don't think there are any double standards on here at all tbh single guys just don't get much attention period it's down to ratios not body size as far as we can see |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
How do you know this? |
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I would say that if it's causing you distress you might need to step back for a bit. Maybe just observe, look around the forum, consider a club or social basically get a feel for how things work with swinging. It takes a very thick skin to continually put yourself out there and never see results. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
Being in shape is no guarantee mate trust me haha...
But yeah I get your point...it's seems like everyone who goes to the gym is on here |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Not a single guy but can imagine how hard it is in here for one but don't think there are any double standards on here at all tbh single guys just don't get much attention period it's down to ratios not body size as far as we can see "
This ratio has not much to do with much as mentioned above like shoes the lady either likes them or not and women love shoes but is that man the correct show fitting  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
It's not double standards it's who someone's attracted to.
I'm guessing you are thinking that men like all sizes but women prefer a fitter guy. In reality women and men are the same, they all like all types.
Don't feel down about it |
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"Not a single guy but can imagine how hard it is in here for one but don't think there are any double standards on here at all tbh single guys just don't get much attention period it's down to ratios not body size as far as we can see
This ratio has not much to do with much as mentioned above like shoes the lady either likes them or not and women love shoes but is that man the correct show fitting "
see what your saying and totally get it |
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By *orl1971Couple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"Not a single guy but can imagine how hard it is in here for one but don't think there are any double standards on here at all tbh single guys just don't get much attention period it's down to ratios not body size as far as we can see "
From what we’ve observed in verifications for guys you don’t see very many bigger bodied guys with many veris whereas the guys with many verifications seem likely to be in semi decent shape. Not a hard and fast rule and there are exceptions.
Realistically, and we’ll get a hard time for this, if a woman wants a meet she can probably get one regardless of body shape. They just have to choose whether they are open to meeting anyone and not be too choosy. |
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"Not a single guy but can imagine how hard it is in here for one but don't think there are any double standards on here at all tbh single guys just don't get much attention period it's down to ratios not body size as far as we can see
From what we’ve observed in verifications for guys you don’t see very many bigger bodied guys with many veris whereas the guys with many verifications seem likely to be in semi decent shape. Not a hard and fast rule and there are exceptions.
Realistically, and we’ll get a hard time for this, if a woman wants a meet she can probably get one regardless of body shape. They just have to choose whether they are open to meeting anyone and not be too choosy. "
guess it's a case of women can afford to be choosy for want of a better description but we know plenty of women who prefer a bigger guy myself included xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've met more larger men through here than skinny men, and the only Adonis bodies men I've met were elsewhere entirely.
Don't blame your weight for a lack of meets  "
Perhaps you could meet the OP then  |
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"I've met more larger men through here than skinny men, and the only Adonis bodies men I've met were elsewhere entirely.
Don't blame your weight for a lack of meets
Perhaps you could meet the OP then "
Why would I do that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've met more larger men through here than skinny men, and the only Adonis bodies men I've met were elsewhere entirely.
Don't blame your weight for a lack of meets
Perhaps you could meet the OP then "
That's an odd request, I'm sure they don't meet men because their big,it's more than that surely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've met more larger men through here than skinny men, and the only Adonis bodies men I've met were elsewhere entirely.
Don't blame your weight for a lack of meets
Perhaps you could meet the OP then
Why would I do that?"
Well if he asked you out would you find him attractive? |
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"I've met more larger men through here than skinny men, and the only Adonis bodies men I've met were elsewhere entirely.
Don't blame your weight for a lack of meets
Perhaps you could meet the OP then
Why would I do that?
Well if he asked you out would you find him attractive?"
Based on the information available, probably not. But it's fuck all to do with not being a gym bunny. |
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
Based on your profile you're fairly average physically.
This place can be hard going, especially for single guys.
I would give Fab a break and if and when you decide to come back, do so with no expectations and a positive attitude.
Nita |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Yet again someone making up bullshite excuses for why they aren't having luck on here. Rather than actually using their head and thinking why they themselves might be having no luck. So much easier I suppose to point the fingers at others. |
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To me, this sounds like your slating other men not the women ha.
Women have the double standards and only want “hot type” men.
Men will fuck “any” women….
Neither are true of course but putting other people down probably isn’t going to help your case.
Moany forum posts/ status’ are a straight delete for me! |
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I don't know. But I don't mind if a ssbbw wants a slim man does not make it double standards it's what they want. I fancy goth girls but I am not a goth I like bbw and ssbbw a long with other body types doesn't mean I have double standards lol but people have tastes |
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OP, it's not about double standards, in my opinion, but about supply and demand. There are much fewer women on here than men and, therefore, women can be more picky, as they would get attention regardless (not necessarily attention from who they want to get attention from). Men, on the other hand, are oversupplied, way too many of them here therefore they have to compete with one another for the attention. Some make an effort, try to stand out from the crowd in the ways that suit them. Other men prefer to blame their lack of success on issues they cannot control instead of working on things they can control.
I'll tell you a secret, OP- whereas there are some women on here who based their choices of men on cock size/looks, most do prefer some personality. Also, confidence is sexy- if you don't like your body and you believe it hinders your chances on here, why should we find your body attractive?
Try putting some personality into your profile, also try getting out and about in the real world or engaging in forum/chats and see how that works. |
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I'm a fat woman who has a preference for tall, toned men. I'm not bothered if someone sees it as a double standard. It's no business of anyone's except me and the person I'm meeting. However I can guarantee that not every "in-shape" guy that messages me is replied to because it's only one element of the whole attraction thing.
If an in-shape guy has a preference for fat women, is that also a double standard? Or is it only a double standard for fat women because they're not worthy of a fit guy?
Since when are people only allowed to like a mirror image of themselves? Did I miss that law being introduced? |
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
Don't think size is the issue it's being male, far to many - need a cull, just not me obvs |
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
How do you know what messages everyone else is getting?
I know a lot of men on here who do rather well and are not as you said "in shape".
I think you'll find there is a lot more to getting a reply or a meet on here than how you look and what shape you are. |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
taunton somerset |
men have choices they choose not to and rather think of just fanny n tits and empty balls ...
i like who i like anything outside my preference wont get a lookin just imagine if all men did that then there would be a few women getting nothing but the fact remains most men will screw anything where most women wont
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It has already been said but women tend to be more discerning when it comes to who to make the beast with two backs with. With the guys far outnumbering the women on fab, they do have the advantage. However, you do see ladies looking for the bigger gent, and I don’t mean cock size. As with most things in life it’s horses for courses (again I don’t mean cock size).  |
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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago
Northampton |
Why do alot of these comments talk like fat women can't just have a preference for a particular type of man, like they wouldn't have the same preference if there were less men etc... I am a fat woman... For me, attraction is based on facial attraction, then personality... not body type. But those that don't have a "good" body always assume it's body type that is what is stopping them meeting and not basic attraction or even personality... Or that us fatties can't have some sort of preference that doesn't include them... How dare we?! This also includes alot of short/bald/hairy/older/younger/black/white/asian/bi/straight/buff/slim/fat/skinny/small cock/average cock/hung guys also (did I miss anyone?) ... And just wondering... Why are you messaging women you think you are too good for... You wouldn't whine if she was a slim, young, "beautiful" babe that you thought was out of your league, eh? You would just take it on the chin n move on... Get over yourself! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
If you believe that not being in shape is causing you to miss out its within your control to change it.. 
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
Maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not true!
All I know is double standards exist on & off Fab it’s just a part of our life’s. No it’s not fair & we might feel like protesting sometimes but honestly no1 is listening & most double standards ain’t gonna change
All you can do is carry on doing your best  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some interesting responses on here I personally think this one is closest to the truth. Purely supply and demand. It’s hard work on FAB as a single guy no two ways about it!
"OP, it's not about double standards, in my opinion, but about supply and demand. There are much fewer women on here than men and, therefore, women can be more picky, as they would get attention regardless (not necessarily attention from who they want to get attention from). Men, on the other hand, are oversupplied, way too many of them here therefore they have to compete with one another for the attention. Some make an effort, try to stand out from the crowd in the ways that suit them. Other men prefer to blame their lack of success on issues they cannot control instead of working on things they can control.
I'll tell you a secret, OP- whereas there are some women on here who based their choices of men on cock size/looks, most do prefer some personality. Also, confidence is sexy- if you don't like your body and you believe it hinders your chances on here, why should we find your body attractive?
Try putting some personality into your profile, also try getting out and about in the real world or engaging in forum/chats and see how that works. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It isn't a double standard because every person is entitled to decide who they sleep with and why.
"
So I've been fucking everyone that messages me when I didn't have to? What the fuck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It isn't a double standard because every person is entitled to decide who they sleep with and why.
So I've been fucking everyone that messages me when I didn't have to? What the fuck."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It isn't a double standard because every person is entitled to decide who they sleep with and why.
So I've been fucking everyone that messages me when I didn't have to? What the fuck."
So have I, some how I missed that in the FAQ |
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
well that’s not the woman’s fault !
Most women & men have a certain attraction to what they like,fat,thin,curvy,tall short or whatever else so there is no way you can call that double standards .
Oh and for the record my own preference is for someone who I’m attracted to and that could be anything from dad body to gym fit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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me and my lady met on this site over 2 years ago. im not gym fit, probably more "dad bod".
while there has to be some form of attraction, what made my lady respond was i made her smile and laugh, be positive, be a little cheeky but not rude. its not all about physical. |
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Is there a double standard? Are women demanding we are in good shapes? Or with all due respect are you barking up the wrong tree/scapegoating the reason for a lack of success?
I'm not in shape (broad lover of pies and ales) yet I had relatively good success here as single guy (granted its not easy for any guy). Over years of experience we've noticed the guys who do well on here and in clubs are the guys who have great personal qualities. That looks (which isn't just about how fit your body is) are an advantage (naturally) but only get you so far. Often a lot of the guys we've seen who are regularly successful are pretty average guys fitness/looks wise. It seems so many men fixate of body and/or penis size rather than looking to their character and nature for success.
I don't see a double standard as such. Maybe a difference in what men and women prioritise when looking for someone. Who are the women with a double standard? I see very few womens profiles where they state must look in great shape. Granted some exist as do some male profiles insisting on a woman being in shape which is perfectly fine BTW to state what you are into and have preferences. Do you have a issue with people seeking to be with others you don't deem they're physically worthy of? Would you like some kind of caste system on here? I don't see a double standard but I do see a case of sour grapes.
Mr
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is there a double standard? Are women demanding we are in good shapes? Or with all due respect are you barking up the wrong tree/scapegoating the reason for a lack of success?
I'm not in shape (broad lover of pies and ales) yet I had relatively good success here as single guy (granted its not easy for any guy). Over years of experience we've noticed the guys who do well on here and in clubs are the guys who have great personal qualities. That looks (which isn't just about how fit your body is) are an advantage (naturally) but only get you so far. Often a lot of the guys we've seen who are regularly successful are pretty average guys fitness/looks wise. It seems so many men fixate of body and/or penis size rather than looking to their character and nature for success.
I don't see a double standard as such. Maybe a difference in what men and women prioritise when looking for someone. Who are the women with a double standard? I see very few womens profiles where they state must look in great shape. Granted some exist as do some male profiles insisting on a woman being in shape which is perfectly fine BTW to state what you are into and have preferences. Do you have a issue with people seeking to be with others you don't deem they're physically worthy of? Would you like some kind of caste system on here? I don't see a double standard but I do see a case of sour grapes.
Mr
"
I actually really like this response. Fab pics and profile too. |
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"Does anyone feel there is a double standard when it comes to weight on here? Like I’m not body shaming but it seems every single man has to be in shape to even get a reply but woman can just be in any shape they want and it doesn’t matter.
It’s so disheartening "
Honestly, it seems to me, based on all the posts and comments on the forum that men are the ones with double standards.
However, the simple solution is, if a profile states they want something you are not, don't message them.
Not everyone is going to like everyone.
Thats just life
MrsAbz |
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