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How should I respond ...
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So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf  ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
As harsh as it sounds, ignore or block a pushy guy who can’t take no like a man. If pushy over messages and can’t appreciate boundaries, imagine them in a sexual situation. Avoid and move on, harsh but true |
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By *nj6969Couple
over a year ago
Grimsby |
We just say not for us if they are not or sorry can't busy.
You don't owe people am explaination we always answer and are polite but sometimes just not for you or us.
If they ask why we answer reason honestly, end of the day they asked!!.
Mnj xxx |
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"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
Replying to everyone with no, or deleting their first message and seeing how they behave can be an amazing filter.
Obviously some guys will rightly take offence thinking you're playing hard to get but generally the good ones will not message again and you can just say oh I deleted it by mistake |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
Why do you say you can't? Sounds like you can't right now but would.
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"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
Overthinking, say no thanks and block or tell them the truth if they persist but that will probably result in a barrage of grief..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
You don’t need a reason other than no |
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"So it's probably been asked before but here goes
When someone messages and suggests meeting up (faf ) I generally politely decline saying "ty but no I cant"
Invariably I get a message back saying why?
How am I supposed to answer that? Sometimes I don't really have a reason I just don't want to. Sometimes I do have a reason and it might hurt their feelings which I wouldn't want to do.
Any suggestions would be appreciated ... yes I am an over thinker "
That’s you’re answer then “I don’t want to” honesty is the best policy.
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Had a few no,s in my time on here, and not questioned it, no memes no.
People have there reasons in my case age plays a big factor or they might not like the look, it does not matter as no is no.
The ones that are annoying are people that contact you, then ignore you or block you for no reason, to me its just strange or rude, but i never get annoyed as life is to short.
What you never do is be rude or offensive if you get a no just take it as no spark and move on |
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"Ask them to do something really random you know they'll say no to, then say sorry no can do.
Only one bloke wanted to be locked in my loft with the others.
Mrs "
Brilliant! Knowing my luck they'd be right up for what I said  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it depends on the message.
If it’s from a no pic profile or just a rude / generic opening message I just delete and ignore. You don’t owe anyone an explanation!
If it’s a nice polite message I sometimes say ‘thanks for the offer but not interested’ or ‘not for me but happy fabbing’
If they come back and query me I ignore. If continue that’s a block.
If someone can’t respect you and your boundaries. in a message how can you trust them to do that in the bedroom. |
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'I wish I could but I don't want to' 
The comment about using a 'no' response as a filter is spot on. We've turned down men, women and couples and how they react had been an eye opener. Some we've gone on to be good Fab mates with. Others are living in blocksville. Interestingly, it's couples who take it the worst, in our experience. |
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By *ickD80Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
Your profile says ‘I’m brutally honest so if that offends you please don’t apply’ but you’ve started a thread asking for advice on what to say to someone rather than telling them the truth if telling them the truth will hurt their feelings….you can’t be brutally honest and be worried about hurting someone’s feelings if you tell them the truth, so which is true? |
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I don’t reply if I’m not interested (usually my profile will explain what I’ll do, so no one should be surprised)
If they then repeat message I block them.
I started off like you but wasted so much time explaining myself to people I wasn’t interested in it got old very quickly |
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