FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Thanks for your message
Thanks for your message
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Dear Various kind offers...
Thanks for your message, just to clarify, I am bisexual which means I like sex with men and women. Therefore your offer of "25 minutes with your Alsatian" doesn't really appeal to me.
Neither do I wish to be dressed in a French maids outfit while you pour custard over my tackle.... If I'm having custard, it needs to be in a dish with apple pie!
Doris .... Whilst I accept that ladies of all ages enjoy sex, no, I don't want to strap your husband to his zimmer frame and beat him with your orthopaedic shoes.
Mr S ..... I appreciate how difficult it is to upload photographs to this site but others seem to manage it... I will not "meet you behind the Dog and Duck for a feel' nor will I meet you "behind the labour club in your wife's tights".
If you haven't got a pic, then I will neither get in my car to drive 50 miles to meet you nor will I invite you to my home, even for a "cup of tea and a finger"!
Thanks for your kind offers, whilst I have considered that I am "missing out" .... I think I'd rather stay home and have a wank.
Thanks
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Clearly a man who knows what he doesn't want!He is and its lovely to see it here ........ he is not laying down just taking it , lol "
Chance would be a fine thing!
I'm just proving that you girls don't have a monopoly on the weird and wonderful world of weird requests |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Clearly a man who knows what he doesn't want!He is and its lovely to see it here ........ he is not laying down just taking it , lol
Chance would be a fine thing!
I'm just proving that you girls don't have a monopoly on the weird and wonderful world of weird requests " well you keep having fun xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dear Various kind offers...
Thanks for your message, just to clarify, I am bisexual which means I like sex with men and women. Therefore your offer of "25 minutes with your Alsatian" doesn't really appeal to me.
Neither do I wish to be dressed in a French maids outfit while you pour custard over my tackle.... If I'm having custard, it needs to be in a dish with apple pie!
Doris .... Whilst I accept that ladies of all ages enjoy sex, no, I don't want to strap your husband to his zimmer frame and beat him with your orthopaedic shoes.
Mr S ..... I appreciate how difficult it is to upload photographs to this site but others seem to manage it... I will not "meet you behind the Dog and Duck for a feel' nor will I meet you "behind the labour club in your wife's tights".
If you haven't got a pic, then I will neither get in my car to drive 50 miles to meet you nor will I invite you to my home, even for a "cup of tea and a finger"!
Thanks for your kind offers, whilst I have considered that I am "missing out" .... I think I'd rather stay home and have a wank.
Thanks
"
Love it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Indecent proposal
What do you mean what do I take you for?
We both know what you are, I am haggling over the price and I will stretch to a Bacardi and and a packet of crisps, now take it or leave it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dear Various kind offers...
Thanks for your message, just to clarify, I am bisexual which means I like sex with men and women. Therefore your offer of "25 minutes with your Alsatian" doesn't really appeal to me.
Neither do I wish to be dressed in a French maids outfit while you pour custard over my tackle.... If I'm having custard, it needs to be in a dish with apple pie!
Doris .... Whilst I accept that ladies of all ages enjoy sex, no, I don't want to strap your husband to his zimmer frame and beat him with your orthopaedic shoes.
Mr S ..... I appreciate how difficult it is to upload photographs to this site but others seem to manage it... I will not "meet you behind the Dog and Duck for a feel' nor will I meet you "behind the labour club in your wife's tights".
If you haven't got a pic, then I will neither get in my car to drive 50 miles to meet you nor will I invite you to my home, even for a "cup of tea and a finger"!
Thanks for your kind offers, whilst I have considered that I am "missing out" .... I think I'd rather stay home and have a wank.
Thanks
"
Dear Gareth
I am sorry that you declined my previous offers re my Alsatian...i actually said "my dog of a partner"
As for the custard it was a typo; should have said Mustard
and i thought you was such a kind man and knew my alter ego is being "doris"; and whats wrong with sex on zimmer frame...have you ever tried it ????
Whilst writing my friend "Mr S" told me to tell its because his Sinclair ZX is so slow and I think your twisting my words; i actually said
" bring your meat and fuck like a dog behind i need a good fuck"
After all that; i no longer want to drive...but that's down to fact i only got one leg and i is blind
Forever not your friend
Jon
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lol ... Very well, but only if you Dare Doris to Dress Decadently!"
... do do do da da da ...(police song?)
Dear Doris
I am Delighted and Delirious seeing you Dressed Decadently and looking Deliciously Demenorish (i made it up).... fancy a shag
Jon |
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