So, a question mainly for the couples and single ladies here.
Am asking as a genuine single guy who always reads peoples profiles and tries to send a decent message, normally with a Face pic attached, but very rarely sees them actually read, do you find that you get so many messages that it is basically impossible to reply to them?
Seems virtually impossible to actually connect with people! |
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Don't believe the "we get 300 messages a day" rubbish, on average we get about 10/15 a day max unless we put up a new picture then could be more.
The problem lies with attraction, if you're not what we're looking for then we won't reply, simple as that, why would we? We can also view your profile without clicking on your message so most times we don't need to open it up.
Also, it clearly states at the top of our profile that we only meet at clubs, but every other message asks for different, so if people can't read the profile, we won't reply! Just how it is for us, but everyone will be different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally we look at the profile first and if we don't feel attracted to that or it has red flags we don't bother reading the message. "
We do this too |
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I look at every message and the profile.
I only reply if there a spark of interest for all sorts of reasons including mutual replies nullify filters, some people don’t take no for an answer, others get nasty. |
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Totally get what you say about attraction, though I tend to only send a Face pic with a message rather than it be in my public pics, which is my preference, but I can see that may hinder my chance of replies from people who choose to filter things the way you do.
Interesting and thank you. |
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"Personally we look at the profile first and if we don't feel attracted to that or it has red flags we don't bother reading the message. "
Similar approach to others it seems and enlightening....thank you! |
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"I look at every message and the profile.
I only reply if there a spark of interest for all sorts of reasons including mutual replies nullify filters, some people don’t take no for an answer, others get nasty. "
Thank you for your input. No is no! Never understand guys who don't get that! |
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"We look at the profile first, if we don't think it will be a good match for us from the profile or if we just plain don't have any attraction then we either delete it or leave it unread. "
Thank you. Definitely seems to be the case that this is how the majority of people seem to filter messages and whether they reply to a message or not. |
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"So, a question mainly for the couples and single ladies here.
Am asking as a genuine single guy who always reads peoples profiles and tries to send a decent message, normally with a Face pic attached, but very rarely sees them actually read, do you find that you get so many messages that it is basically impossible to reply to them?
Seems virtually impossible to actually connect with people! "
Well i disagree...you can actually feel that energy even through messages. Even first hello message...  I can anyway...  but than again...im just a bit of weirdo  |
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"I usually glance at a message then send a no thanks if they've obviously not read the profile.
If it looks like they have, I'll look at theirs. Then probably send a no thanks  "
Thank you. This is how I envisaged people filtering and why I always read a profile and try to send a message relevant to it...which of course it should be if I like the profile enough to want to message! |
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"We look at the profile first, if we don't think it will be a good match for us from the profile or if we just plain don't have any attraction then we either delete it or leave it unread.
Thank you. Definitely seems to be the case that this is how the majority of people seem to filter messages and whether they reply to a message or not."
Is for us, that's why we don't put any pressure on a first message as well. We are more than happy to just receive a 'Hi', don't need war and peace or attempts to make us laugh or anything like that, they just come across as cringe most of the time. |
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"So, a question mainly for the couples and single ladies here.
Am asking as a genuine single guy who always reads peoples profiles and tries to send a decent message, normally with a Face pic attached, but very rarely sees them actually read, do you find that you get so many messages that it is basically impossible to reply to them?
Seems virtually impossible to actually connect with people! Well i disagree...you can actually feel that energy even through messages. Even first hello message... I can anyway... but than again...im just a bit of weirdo "
That is what I kind of think (not that you are weird!), hence why I always try to write what I hope is a decent first message. |
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"Always check messages and profiles and answer at least once, rude not to  "
Me as well, but I think, as per my initial question couples and single women get so many more, it is very interesting to hear how people filter them out initially. |
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"We take a look at the profile first and decide whether we will reply."
Thank you. Certainly seems to be the way which the majority filter out whose message to read and then potentially to reply to, as opposed to the actual message initially. |
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"We also read a profile from the bottom upwards. If it has that pointless legal mumbo jumbo in it we instantly know the person isn't for us. "
Thank you and after others, as well as you mentioning this, it will be departing from my profile shortly!! |
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