FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Are the guys on here that bad ??
Are the guys on here that bad ??
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Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely not all, have meet some really nice men on here.
But have had some horrible disgusting messages from men too. Especially the ones that don’t like to be rejected  |
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Some men are brilliant,some not and if you say no thanks they send abuse or ask why not ,as if they're entitled to meet you
Some couples can be bad too though and don't make an effort or get arsey too.
I'm guessing some women might also not take rejection well,but I'm not looking for them so I don't have any experience of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
I have had a few abusive guys, some apologise. Only had one woman abuse me having spent a week organising a meet then she read I was bi and met a tgurl. Had a right tantrum. I wouldn't mind but she was happy to do anal. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
Quite honestly yes.. and no im not virtue signalling or currying favour.. the things ive seen and read on the last month or so from guys in chat rooms or in messages ive seen that have been sent to female friends are nothing short of verbal r**e, abuse, threats and downright vile..
ive started challenging it when I see it and I implore other good guys to do the same.. Apathy and ignorance fuel the problem |
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It's probably a 50/50 split for us so far. Some take "no thank you" brilliantly, others get very abusive. We learnt that was pretty normal in our first few days on here and just accept it as part of the site |
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Generally if a lady / couple say not for me / us to me I find it best to thank them for their time. Sometimes I ask for honest feedback and in my humble opinion of someone takes the time to reply then I thank them again. Are men really that thin skinned. I don't find every woman attractive and certainly I'm not attractive to every woman! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's probably a 50/50 split for us so far. Some take "no thank you" brilliantly, others get very abusive. We learnt that was pretty normal in our first few days on here and just accept it as part of the site "
I hear ya, but no we shouldn't accept men being abusive with the word no, not here or anywhere. if they handle an online rejection with such anger, are we, by not challenging them allowing them to transcend the cyber world and behave like that irl? |
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No excuse for being rude.
Everyone is here for their own reasons.
Some may want a guy to play with whilst others may want something very different..
As lovely as us guys like to think we are, we are simply not what evryone wants and is looking for.
Be KIND, Be gentlemanly
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Generally if a lady / couple say not for me / us to me I find it best to thank them for their time. Sometimes I ask for honest feedback and in my humble opinion of someone takes the time to reply then I thank them again. Are men really that thin skinned. I don't find every woman attractive and certainly I'm not attractive to every woman! "
They may be just normal blokes who have been ignored or binned by everyone they've ever messaged and they're feeling incredibly shit about themselves. ...And then lash out at someone who finally replies but it's a "no thanks".
That is not an excuse, just a reason. |
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"It's probably a 50/50 split for us so far. Some take "no thank you" brilliantly, others get very abusive. We learnt that was pretty normal in our first few days on here and just accept it as part of the site
I hear ya, but no we shouldn't accept men being abusive with the word no, not here or anywhere. if they handle an online rejection with such anger, are we, by not challenging them allowing them to transcend the cyber world and behave like that irl?"
I absolutely agree with you however, irl I've been headbutted, spat at, punched and given abuse for also challenging the entitlement behind being pissed about the rejection. So it feels like a damned if you do, damned if you don't.
So I opt for the quiet life. It's not right but men like this don't listen to women, that's why so many women, through various movements over the years, are pushing for men to hold men accountable in the hope we may start to slowly see change.
For now, we still say no thank and if/when the abuse comes, we just block |
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
Yes they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are decent guys and abusive dickheads on here just as I imagine there are everywhere. Frankly I’d rather discover someone has a nasty streak online than find out in person. But blanket statements about single men in here just fuel this behaviour by making it seem more widespread than it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are decent guys and abusive dickheads on here just as I imagine there are everywhere. **Frankly I’d rather discover someone has a nasty streak online than find out in person.** But blanket statements about single men in here just fuel this behaviour by making it seem more widespread than it is. "
** 
And yes... Some men are lovely.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
Can honestly say no!
I get plenty of Messages, my block list is quite small I’d say
Never had abuse from anyone who has been turned down, normally a polite ,ok enjoy your day , what a shame , or good luck
Block list has been for a few very creepy men
Overall well behaved |
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
the Dromara hills |
"It’s good to know there’s some genuine ones out there like me
Oh youre one of the genuine ones are you?
Thank god, the women will be flocking to you so"
Sorry, I was thinking the same.
The genuine ones, the honest ones, the decent ones etc don't need to declare it, it is apparent with their words and deeds. As soon as you put "like me", people will pull stumps and retire for tea.
Sorry dude. |
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By *elloWoman
over a year ago
alpha centauri |
"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
Abusive messages are rare in my inbox, occasionally I might be in a chatty mood and send a thanks but no thanks reply unfortunately this does result in them not taking no as an answer and try to persuade me to change my mind.
I also get repetitive messaging after I've deleted previous unanswered messages which I then just block them, and it's not just men, Its also couples who do this and they often send lazy messages not just single men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
The vast majority of guys on here are fine, just voting, so they get ignored
Instead we focus on the tiny fraction that are nasty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies
The vast majority of guys on here are fine, just voting, so they get ignored
Instead we focus on the tiny fraction that are nasty "
Boring ** |
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Since hitting 40 I get a lot less messages.
From the messages I do get, about 80% of them are either eye wateringly banal, show that they've not read my profile, or are just sending copy and paste messages.
That being said, I cannot remember the last time I had any kind of abusive message.
So yeah, they're not that bad. They're just not about to set the world on fire. |
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By *edanitoTV/TS
over a year ago
Kings Lynn |
"Since hitting 40 I get a lot less messages.
From the messages I do get, about 80% of them are either eye wateringly banal, show that they've not read my profile, or are just sending copy and paste messages.
That being said, I cannot remember the last time I had any kind of abusive message.
So yeah, they're not that bad. They're just not about to set the world on fire."
If they are abusive then that just demonstrates how emotionally underdeveloped they are! Ive literally been arriving at the front door of a meeting after lots of sexy chat. They bottled it, didnt answer the door, then deleted their profile! It was pissing it down. I posted a hastily written note with their username and real name on it " The next time your looking to fuck a femboy in suspenders and arrange a meeting over the Internet, make me travel to meet you and then leave me in the rain - get a fleshlight and watch some tranny porn or ask your wife for anal. " |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Since hitting 40 I get a lot less messages.
From the messages I do get, about 80% of them are either eye wateringly banal, show that they've not read my profile, or are just sending copy and paste messages.
That being said, I cannot remember the last time I had any kind of abusive message.
So yeah, they're not that bad. They're just not about to set the world on fire."
I just hit 50. Definitely get messages less so sone correlation around age. And your description of messages is spot on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thankfully, we didn't see any abusive messages. Some are plain boring copy/paste, some are weird, had some stroppy ones, but mostly great conversations. |
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Some are worse than you can possibly imagine and some are absolutely lovely. I’ve got my filters set up so no men can message me anymore and Fab is definitely a nicer place to be since doing so. It’s a shame some of us feel the need to do that, but it’s frankly a relief not to have vile messages or dick pics in my inbox anymore. |
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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago
Near Marlborough |
Some people are. Regardless of gender. Just fuckwits behind a keyboard with nothing interesting or original to say. Protected by anonymity they can think themselves brave or funny or whatever passes as thought (if they even think). Not worth the wasting of a momentary concern from the reader. Although sometimes it can be truly upsetting for some.
V x
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By *exhillboyMan
over a year ago
Vilamoura Portugal |
There are definitely genuine and respectful guys on here but you only need to take a quick glance round the chat rooms to realise there is a huge number of guys that feel entitled. They treat the ladies on cam as if they are employed to pamper to their every sexual need. Many women refuse to go on cam as a result of the abuse they receive. |
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"Listening and seeing some statuses on here are quite shocking!
Are the guys on here that bad ?
Abusive to you ladies after you turn them down is terrible… I just don’t get it …. I’m sure there are some genuine guys on here for you ladies "
I don't think it is just on here, it happens everyehere. |
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It pays to be selective and to not trust everything that you are told. This is an open access site, so you can easily be in contact with the worst of what you'd find in the world 
Most of the guys out themselves as duffers, by zero effort profiles and messages, or fairly soon afterwards. Thank goodness
But with many men here, there's choice and ability to find the many other good ones
Block the unsuitable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh yes. NOT having sex with them makes me a "fat ugly slut", turning them down makes me "not [their] type", pointing out the floors in their porn inspired pick up lines means I don't really know my body. Oh, and a fair number have asked if I'm trans because of my jawline. It's funny, and I never take it to heart, but I do take screenshots so I can laugh with my ladies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh yes. NOT having sex with them makes me a "fat ugly slut", turning them down makes me "not [their] type", pointing out the floors in their porn inspired pick up lines means I don't really know my body. Oh, and a fair number have asked if I'm trans because of my jawline. It's funny, and I never take it to heart, but I do take screenshots so I can laugh with my ladies "
Well you are neither fat nor ugly so screw them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh yes. NOT having sex with them makes me a "fat ugly slut", turning them down makes me "not [their] type", pointing out the floors in their porn inspired pick up lines means I don't really know my body. Oh, and a fair number have asked if I'm trans because of my jawline. It's funny, and I never take it to heart, but I do take screenshots so I can laugh with my ladies "
I have to say WOW you are amazing any guy would be lucky to even get a chance from you be proud of your body as its stunning |
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Been on here a few years and have been lucky enough to meet some wonderful ladies.
My goodness some of the messages they get after a polite no you would get arrested and locked up.
Always be polite and say appreciate the reply happy fabbing |
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"Generally if a lady / couple say not for me / us to me I find it best to thank them for their time. Sometimes I ask for honest feedback and in my humble opinion of someone takes the time to reply then I thank them again. Are men really that thin skinned. I don't find every woman attractive and certainly I'm not attractive to every woman!
They may be just normal blokes who have been ignored or binned by everyone they've ever messaged and they're feeling incredibly shit about themselves. ...And then lash out at someone who finally replies but it's a "no thanks".
That is not an excuse, just a reason."
Every message I ever sent was ignored ,or binned ,so I just stopped wasting my time ,and stopped messaging people. I've never sent anyone a second message ,or abused anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Generally if a lady / couple say not for me / us to me I find it best to thank them for their time. Sometimes I ask for honest feedback and in my humble opinion of someone takes the time to reply then I thank them again. Are men really that thin skinned. I don't find every woman attractive and certainly I'm not attractive to every woman!
They may be just normal blokes who have been ignored or binned by everyone they've ever messaged and they're feeling incredibly shit about themselves. ...And then lash out at someone who finally replies but it's a "no thanks".
That is not an excuse, just a reason.
Every message I ever sent was ignored ,or binned ,so I just stopped wasting my time ,and stopped messaging people. I've never sent anyone a second message ,or abused anyone. "
Most men are decent.  |
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