FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > “Over a year ago” on fab but no veris?
“Over a year ago” on fab but no veris?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag? |
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Red flag OP. It’s not that hard (excuse the pun) to get meet verified, at least by attending social.
I got one individual like this today.
Apparently can’t remember he joined a year ago 
Really? Grow up. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Red flag OP. It’s not that hard (excuse the pun) to get meet verified, at least by attending social.
I got one individual like this today.
Apparently can’t remember he joined a year ago
Really? Grow up."
I’ve had one insist he was meet verified but no green tick. He forgot he messaged me this before and when asked again he said he has met two people but they don’t like to do verifications  |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
This is me. I have been verified a couple of times previously and left but come back (as we do). Clubs arent my scene.
Maybe create a single male profile and try and get a meet. It is a struggle but for the genuine ladies and cpls I have met its been worthwhile |
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Wow a year and no meets I'd give up and join a monastery
Like you say ,clubs are a great place but only if they can hold a conversation and have a giggle ,and the rest well we all know what happens next hey |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?
This is me. I have been verified a couple of times previously and left but come back (as we do). Clubs arent my scene.
Maybe create a single male profile and try and get a meet. It is a struggle but for the genuine ladies and cpls I have met its been worthwhile"
Why not go to a local social? Less intimating than a club or ask someone you previously met on your old account to verify you? |
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A red flag to me. I appreciate it is harder for men to get meets but over a year is excessive. Suggest they’re either all talk or simply haven’t taken anyone’s fancy yet which in that length of time indicates they likely won’t take mine either. |
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"Red flag OP. It’s not that hard (excuse the pun) to get meet verified, at least by attending social.
I got one individual like this today.
Apparently can’t remember he joined a year ago
Really? Grow up.
I’ve had one insist he was meet verified but no green tick. He forgot he messaged me this before and when asked again he said he has met two people but they don’t like to do verifications "
Short memory loss it seems 
Incurable but luckily for us, another great filter. |
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"
Maybe create a single male profile and try and get a meet. "
No thanks. I’ll go by usual everyday threads, they tell me everything I need to know.
I also know many men getting verified and successfully meeting within weeks of joining.
Luck? I don’t think so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Going by the number of forum posts by guys complaining that they can't get meets, a year with no veris seems unsurprising to me. "
Not sure what a verification for a man would prove anyway.
Some have difficulty finding someone to meet.
Some have no intention of meeting and just want wank chat.
Easy to figure out which it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A red flag to me. I appreciate it is harder for men to get meets but over a year is excessive. Suggest they’re either all talk or simply haven’t taken anyone’s fancy yet which in that length of time indicates they likely won’t take mine either."
Or they didn't fancy the women who offered.
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By *antasycouple31Couple
over a year ago
Between Pontarddulias and Gorseinon |
I guess it depends and some people may take a while to come out of their shell. Our profile we have been here for years, but all our veries are quite new as it’s only recently that’s we’ve really thrown ourselves into it.
Everyone is different but I guess it depends how they are coming across in their communications I.e we had a message from a single lady, she had verifications but the profile and message just seemed fake. |
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By *MCMan
over a year ago
London/EA |
Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
I’d have to just mention that I have actually been on the site as a ‘Couple’ and a ‘Single’, obviously my couples veris have gone as it’s deleted but when it comes to the single some of my veris have actually disappeared because people have left the site (it happens)
I think sometimes it’s all about building trust with someone and if they are truly genuine then something may well happen given the chance x |
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"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
"
There are local Fab organised socials with plenty people attending, those are the socials we are talking to, rather than 1:1, which I would agree with your point. |
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By *MCMan
over a year ago
London/EA |
"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
There are local Fab organised socials with plenty people attending, those are the socials we are talking to, rather than 1:1, which I would agree with your point. "
Appreciate that, easier in larger locations.
For example I’d happily attend one in London because there’s a larger number of active members to attend and a higher chance I have mutual interests etc, when I go back and visit EA I wouldn’t due to a lot less active users user to location and my original point. |
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"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
There are local Fab organised socials with plenty people attending, those are the socials we are talking to, rather than 1:1, which I would agree with your point.
Appreciate that, easier in larger locations.
For example I’d happily attend one in London because there’s a larger number of active members to attend and a higher chance I have mutual interests etc, when I go back and visit EA I wouldn’t due to a lot less active users user to location and my original point."
I agree, totally makes sense.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
There are local Fab organised socials with plenty people attending, those are the socials we are talking to, rather than 1:1, which I would agree with your point.
Appreciate that, easier in larger locations.
For example I’d happily attend one in London because there’s a larger number of active members to attend and a higher chance I have mutual interests etc, when I go back and visit EA I wouldn’t due to a lot less active users user to location and my original point."
I live in rural Wales and even we have lots of organised social  |
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Hmmm, tbf it does seem guys are damned if they do and damned if they don’t as either way they’ll be heavily scrutinised on the forum and condemned for one reason or another. Even seen it go so far as judging and debating their choice of who they meet despite it being a positive review. Often it’ll be something silly like they have a positive review from meeting with someone that is TS or other silly stuff. Ultimately though I guess if unsure then arrange a vid chat first so you can get a feel for what they’re really like, follow that up with a social and go from there if your willing to give them a chance and invest a bit of time in finding out. However you then risk having far more of your time wasted and possibly negative experiences, which understandably you think isn’t worth the trouble. On the plus side though, there are far more men on here than woman and plenty of then have numerous verification so you can just block them and still have plenty of guys to chat with etc regardless of whether you feel it a reg flag or not x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's difficult for men to get a meet, not everyone is comfortable with large socials or clubs, certainly not something I'd do. I'd be more wary of a woman or couple with no veris than a man. They get suspicion if they've none, slated if they have too many lol.
Is it not better just to chat and get to know them than relying on what's basically a 'prick advisor' system? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's difficult for men to get a meet, not everyone is comfortable with large socials or clubs, certainly not something I'd do. I'd be more wary of a woman or couple with no veris than a man. They get suspicion if they've none, slated if they have too many lol.
Is it not better just to chat and get to know them than relying on what's basically a 'prick advisor' system?"
I’ve had one meet with someone that is now no longer a member and one with one who has t left a verification.
It’s difficult to get a meet and you’re right the. Luv scene on my own isn’t really my thing
Trying to convince someone you’re genuine when you have no verifications is difficult |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honesty.. Verifications are to me a bit like saying he was great in the sack. I thought they were to just justify that we are who we say we are.
I always go with my own gut instinct anyway not reading 250 veris
Would I see alarm bells. No. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am one of those single men who has veris but from over a year ago.
Why?
Well, without going in to detail. Things in real life went to shit for me and I was having an extremely hard time.
I needed to focus on myself and getting better and part of that was staying away from Fab and the swinging scene.
So that's what I did. I'd log in every few months to say hi to the friends I've made.
Other than, I had zero interest in meets, socials...both 1on1 and organised. |
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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago
Reading |
Yes I have no veris for over five years. There is a very good reason. I am not the type of person who would go to a social on my own. From looking there have been none or any soon listed in my area. This I mean not driving miles . Again clubs going on own . Would be same. I think nearest club to me is Heathrow ? So again not exactly within easy travelling distance.
Yes do have on profile that will travel. This would be after chatting etc and arrangements made to meet.
As others have said . Unless live in area where there are regular socials or clubs . To get veris not easy ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's difficult for men to get a meet, not everyone is comfortable with large socials or clubs, certainly not something I'd do. I'd be more wary of a woman or couple with no veris than a man. They get suspicion if they've none, slated if they have too many lol.
Is it not better just to chat and get to know them than relying on what's basically a 'prick advisor' system?
I’ve had one meet with someone that is now no longer a member and one with one who has t left a verification.
It’s difficult to get a meet and you’re right the. Luv scene on my own isn’t really my thing
Trying to convince someone you’re genuine when you have no verifications is difficult"
I'm sure theres a lot in same boat. I thought if someone left the veri disappeared but the green tick remained. Anyway, I lean more to relying on my own impression of someone bia chat etc than other peoples thoughts on them. Not all veris are exactly accurate either. Not dissing those who rely on them though |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
I recently asked for some profile feedback from a local couple and one of their suggestions was to hide my verifications . Equally there are threads on the forums talking about whether people actually like to get verifications any more. I guess it’s different for everyone. All I would suggest it’s verifications alone should not influence whether you interact with someone regarding a possible meet. You will have other factors that you consider important and they should probably take precedence  |
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All the usual 'go to a club or social'.
Not everyone feels comfortable in a club environment, nor have 'local' socials. We can see how hard it may be for a single male, especially if they aren't actually single.
We're actually more skeptical of women without veris than we are men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"All the usual 'go to a club or social'.
Not everyone feels comfortable in a club environment, nor have 'local' socials. We can see how hard it may be for a single male, especially if they aren't actually single.
We're actually more skeptical of women without veris than we are men. "
Exactly this, I've no interest in large socials and wouldnt do clubs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"All the usual 'go to a club or social'.
Not everyone feels comfortable in a club environment, nor have 'local' socials. We can see how hard it may be for a single male, especially if they aren't actually single.
We're actually more skeptical of women without veris than we are men. "
I definitely agree with this |
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"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
"
That comment was referring to organised group socials where you can meet lots of people. |
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Speaking as a single guy with no verifications and been a site member / supporter for some time I can tell you it’s a lot harder for us…. No pun intended.
With the greatest respect to all the couples and single females on here we’re just fish in a barrel for them.
I’ve wanted to play with a couple before going to a club for a long time but sadly for a lot of single guys out there this just isn’t a possibility unless you have a stand out profile or vwe
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Having been on fab for some time I don’t list my veri’s by choice. For me it’s not a cattle market or bed scoring notch board. I have photo verified to prove who I am and the rest happens in real life.
For those who have an issue with that so be it and it wasn’t meant to be but others enjoy the discretion. |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?
I recently asked for some profile feedback from a local couple and one of their suggestions was to hide my verifications . Equally there are threads on the forums talking about whether people actually like to get verifications any more. I guess it’s different for everyone. All I would suggest it’s verifications alone should not influence whether you interact with someone regarding a possible meet. You will have other factors that you consider important and they should probably take precedence "
For a single male wanting to meet outside of clubs or organised social events, verifications are important (but not crucial) and in my opinion one of the cornerstones of Fab. Veris compliment having a nice set of photos and an engaging profile and sets you apart from the hoards of other single guy profiles. Think of it like the Amazon of swinging, sure, you could search for a thing, read the blurb, check out the pictures and buy it even though it’s had zero reviews but reading other buyer positive reviews and comments makes you more confident about pressing the buy button…
By having a good set of veris it shows that you do actually meet (not a time wasting, fantasist keyboard wanker), shows the type of people you meet (who doesn’t scan the profiles of the verifiers? “Oh he’s met that lovely couple we know, cool, let’s message him”) and together with supporting comments and the compliments paid, that you’re active (with recent meets taking place).
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
Belfast |
Do you know how much difference it has made to my success by getting club verified and social verified?
None.
I can work out to change my body and change my profile to be something I am not. I can't change my face though so it doesn't matter if I'm verified or not, I just don't appeal to the majority of folk.
I suspect that if I had a six pack, chiselled jaw, a sculpted beard, shaved my cock and it was bigger, I would have far more offers to meet and would have been verified fairly rapidly.
If I hadn't been to a club, I would be heading towards the year on fab and unverified. It is me putting people off, not my lack of verifications.
If the attraction isn't there, a meet won't happen. And if someone isn't attracted to a man, no veri's, too many veri's, wrong kind of veri's, veri'd suspiciously quickly etc would be an excuse to not meet.
Bear in mind as well that a lack of verifications isn't just the preserve of single men filling their wank bank. |
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As its been said before, everyone uses the site differently. Personally i like to meet folk through socials, i use the site more for chatting and the forums. I think too much emphasis is put on verifications. I choose not to show mine. "They have too many", "they have not enough/none" ect ect. Not everyone will agree. If everyone had the same opinion the world would be a boring place.
How about this, would you complain if someone had a glowing verification and it turns out they were crap in bed? |
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Took me 11 months to finally meet someone I liked, I had offers beforehand but they wasn't what I was looking for, I'd be more wary of a Woman/couple who hadn't had a meet after a year more then a Man |
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"Took me 11 months to finally meet someone I liked, I had offers beforehand but they wasn't what I was looking for, I'd be more wary of a Woman/couple who hadn't had a meet after a year more then a Man"
A really good point.
Any woman or couple on here a year without a single meet are either super selective, very busy, in the wrong place, or fake.
For men, getting off the zero is actually really hard. And even attending a club or social doesn't absolutely guarantee a meet.
But one thing we do if we think we smell a fake woman/couple - is we ask for a good old fashioned proof pic - get them to hold up a sign with 'Hello Miniskirtcouple' written on it. That can't be faked.
With single guys, we're now always asking for a social first - that both verifies them as real and willing, and also enables us to test for general compatibility before we commit to a full swinging meet. |
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I mean there are a whole host of reasons for this to be the case and yes one of those reasons being that they’re ‘pic collectors.’ I would however say it’s a little narrow minded to say that everyone without a veri is this type. I’m on a 6 month baron spell myself but would class myself as experienced. So am I now not allowed to talk to certain people because I’m fake??
Even the gnarliest of women/couples get inundated with messages offering a meet.....the same isn’t quite said for single men. Yeah there are a lot of fuckwits on here but also a lot of good guys!! |
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Personally I’ve always been happy to cam, chat on the phone and meet socially. Certainly have no interest in picture or video collecting, have you seen how much porn there is on the net lol. You’d be insane to pay site support to simply do that with what’s out there on the internet. For me though, club verification was the simplest option as it gave me chance to try the club scene (which is something I wanted to try) while also being able to ask for a verification so people know I’m me, I’m real and genuine. As a single guy though I find what makes even a social meet or cam chat so difficult to arrange is they/them have so many other guys interested in them your just one bod in a crowd of bods trying to stand out. So regardless of you as a person or how much you do invest in trying to get to know them its rarely respirated as people will naturally only commit time to the one from the over crowded group they like the most, regardless of any initial interest they may have shown you. It’s easy to be cynical of that though untill you’ve experienced it. All I can say to any one that’s not a single male, set up a signal male profile yourself and see what experiences you have. Single guys get a lot of bashing on the forum pages so I can’t say it would hurt for more fabers to also know what it like for signal guys that complete waste of spaces and yes sadly there does seem a fair few x |
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I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net. |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
I have been working hard trying to get a meet ,even for a one on one social for a coffee since the day I joined with no luck whatsoever .
My main problem is the brick wall where profiles state "if you don't have meet verifications ,your message will be deleted ".
So ,it's not through lack of effort,or not putting effort into my profile ,or not adding regular up to date photos, I do all of these things .
Yes ,I would love to meet people and make new friends on here ,but sadly ,a lot of couples and single women make it impossible to contact them because I don't have any meet verifications.
It's a vicious circle . I can't get a meet verification, because most people won't meet non meet verified single blokes. You can't win .
I try and maximise my chances by being photo verified, and paying to be a site supporter every month ,but I feel my chances are extremely restricted because of that golden ticket of the "meet verifications ". |
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I have to say ,that ,after reading every post on this thread ,the attitude of some couples and single women towards us single blokes who havnt had a meet are staggering.
It's almost as if we are looked upon as dirt because we havnt had the fortune of having a meet in over a year on here ,despite the majority of couples and single women saying they won't meet "non meet verified " blokes .
They are basically saying , you havnt had a meet in over a year of being a member on here ,so you are a time waster ,even though we won't meet you ourselves because you don't have meet verifications.
Talk about sticking the boot in .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have to say ,that ,after reading every post on this thread ,the attitude of some couples and single women towards us single blokes who havnt had a meet are staggering.
It's almost as if we are looked upon as dirt because we havnt had the fortune of having a meet in over a year on here ,despite the majority of couples and single women saying they won't meet "non meet verified " blokes .
They are basically saying , you havnt had a meet in over a year of being a member on here ,so you are a time waster ,even though we won't meet you ourselves because you don't have meet verifications.
Talk about sticking the boot in .
"
Why do you care what those types think? Would you really want to stick your cock in someone who has that attitude about men?
It's sad that they demand someone to be verified before they will meet them but won't give someone a chance for his first veri. Those types need babysitting and can't think for themselves. |
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If they haven’t had a meet in over a year and you like their profile/chat, just have a quick video/phone call etc.
We’re wary of couples profiles that haven’t had any veris in a couple of years in case they’ve split up so ask for a video chat. |
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Its hard to get a meet on here and i often ask for social meets with like minded adults so people can see i am genuine but no luck...so i can see how its possible and hopefully i dont become one of them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's definitely difficult getting meets as a single guy as will all know we are the biggest percentage of site users, I've tried clubs and tbh I found it just as bad as on here trying to get a little fun
But I'll keep trying
Also it doesn't help when you get a verification of someone and they leave as the verification just disappears |
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"I have to say ,that ,after reading every post on this thread ,the attitude of some couples and single women towards us single blokes who havnt had a meet are staggering.
It's almost as if we are looked upon as dirt because we havnt had the fortune of having a meet in over a year on here ,despite the majority of couples and single women saying they won't meet "non meet verified " blokes .
They are basically saying , you havnt had a meet in over a year of being a member on here ,so you are a time waster ,even though we won't meet you ourselves because you don't have meet verifications.
Talk about sticking the boot in .
Why do you care what those types think? Would you really want to stick your cock in someone who has that attitude about men?
It's sad that they demand someone to be verified before they will meet them but won't give someone a chance for his first veri. Those types need babysitting and can't think for themselves. "
Thank you for your kind words. |
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Not every genuine male on this site is full of confidence. We are all different after all.
It took me about 15 months before I had my first meet which lead to a verification. Prior to that, I had socials but not everybody feels comfortable leaving reviews and verifications.
Going by my personal experience, people called me out saying that I was fake after going so long without a veri. Its not as easy as it sounds.
If you think an individual is worth investing a bit if time in; judge them on what they do and how they respond rather than judging them on whether they have a verification or not.
After all, I've come across plenty of fake single lady and couple fake accounts, that are all verified. Work that one out? |
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"Wow a year and no meets I'd give up and join a monastery
Like you say ,clubs are a great place but only if they can hold a conversation and have a giggle ,and the rest well we all know what happens next hey "
Not all men are comfortable with the club scene. So saying "Oh it's easy, just go to a club". What works for you, doesn't work for others. It's not as easy as most of you think |
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"Playing devils advocate here on the ‘just go to a local social’ response that has and will always arise, and I’m sure someone will say they would just to put the cat amongst the pigeons….
However, I personally wouldn’t meet someone I wasn’t somewhat attracted to, so why would I go on a social with them to get a verification?
Even if it was defined from the outset as a social I’d just feel like I was using them in an attempt to get a meet I actually wanted..
Sure this will get a mixed response but hey ho, can’t please everyone..
"
Precisely . I wouldn't want to waste anyone's time if I had no intention of wanting to fuck them.
Meeting up just for the sake of accumulating a veri sounds a bit shit if you ask me  |
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"Honesty.. Verifications are to me a bit like saying he was great in the sack. I thought they were to just justify that we are who we say we are.
I always go with my own gut instinct anyway not reading 250 veris
Would I see alarm bells. No. "
This |
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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago
Reading |
I posted earlier in the thread. Just to add though in real life . Yes this only applies to single males , single females. If a male went out to bars , clubs etc . Would he get laid that night. ? But if female did same . Being polite no matter what size , looks etc . She would have a perhaps 90% or more chance of getting laid ? |
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By *onicZMan
over a year ago
Nottinghamshire |
Took me years to get a meet. Still haven't had one via this site but changed the way i did things recently and met loads of decent people in various club environments hence building up my verifications finally.
Doesn't really mean anything. |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
I would say it is a bit of red flag but it's hard for men to get a meet at the beginning and many won't do the group social thing. Webcam doesn't mean much for men as nobody is going to fake being a man
I would say more of a red flag if a single lady or couple not meet verified after a year as they will have lots of opportunities if they so wish. If they don't have one it might be just that they want privacy but more likely either a single man behind the profile or they are just very unlikely to meet anyone ever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net. "
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat |
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"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net.
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat "
Comments like I’d be put off if they have 100s or are all clubs ones are the exact reason why I rarely interact with people on here and prefer to meet at events. Eliminates any prejudice and means one can be taken at face value. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net.
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat
Comments like I’d be put off if they have 100s or are all clubs ones are the exact reason why I rarely interact with people on here and prefer to meet at events. Eliminates any prejudice and means one can be taken at face value. "
It's not prejudice though, its merely something that doesnt appeal to me. It's your gig, great, I've no problem with that |
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"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net.
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat
Comments like I’d be put off if they have 100s or are all clubs ones are the exact reason why I rarely interact with people on here and prefer to meet at events. Eliminates any prejudice and means one can be taken at face value.
It's not prejudice though, its merely something that doesnt appeal to me. It's your gig, great, I've no problem with that "
I believe it is because you’re making a judgement based off two trivial things E.g. where they go and people they interact with, rather than the content of someone’s character.
But it’s fine I’m happy to agree to disagree. What’s good for the goose, isn’t always what’s good for the gander so each to their own |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net.
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat
Comments like I’d be put off if they have 100s or are all clubs ones are the exact reason why I rarely interact with people on here and prefer to meet at events. Eliminates any prejudice and means one can be taken at face value.
It's not prejudice though, its merely something that doesnt appeal to me. It's your gig, great, I've no problem with that
I believe it is because you’re making a judgement based off two trivial things E.g. where they go and people they interact with, rather than the content of someone’s character.
But it’s fine I’m happy to agree to disagree. What’s good for the goose, isn’t always what’s good for the gander so each to their own "
What...like you're making a judgement of me now? I've no interest in clubs so someone who does would have no interest in me, it's not that complicated but obviously we can all read into things as we choose |
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"I did think that as a single male (married open relationship), if i had verifications it would help with people being interested but i think its more about the connection when chatting. If you are unsure then best to avoid. Verifications are just an extra safety net.
I'm not convinced on the safety net thing. A verification is just someone elses opinion, it's not fact and doesnt really mean the person is genuine. People fib in verifications, overplay and say what they think is expected. I honestly have never refused to chat because a person has no verifications. I'm more put off if they have 100s or they are all club ones. If you're a decent person that will show through regardless during chat
Comments like I’d be put off if they have 100s or are all clubs ones are the exact reason why I rarely interact with people on here and prefer to meet at events. Eliminates any prejudice and means one can be taken at face value.
It's not prejudice though, its merely something that doesnt appeal to me. It's your gig, great, I've no problem with that
I believe it is because you’re making a judgement based off two trivial things E.g. where they go and people they interact with, rather than the content of someone’s character.
But it’s fine I’m happy to agree to disagree. What’s good for the goose, isn’t always what’s good for the gander so each to their own
What...like you're making a judgement of me now? I've no interest in clubs so someone who does would have no interest in me, it's not that complicated but obviously we can all read into things as we choose "
If you feel I was judging you then I offer my sincerest apologies as that was not my intention. Don’t have an issue at all with those who don’t go to clubs and wouldn’t not necessarily be interested in a person because of that or if they have “100’s” of verifications, depending on the nature of said verifications of course. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I was quite lucky in I know a couple of People here and met them on my old profile and they sent me new Veris' for this Profile..
It is extremely hard to get Veris', I've done a couple of individual social meets and they didn't leave Veris' , I also was at a Recent UtB Social and didn't get a single Veri from that!
But Yes, over a Year and No Veris' at all is a bit unexplainable |
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"I joined got first veris after week but I attend club
And you are a woman . Totally different to being a single bloke on here ."
I had my first verification in ten days. 5 in the first month. 30 in the first four. I don't display them all as the majority are from group socials and don't really tell any story.
I would be wary of any woman or couple that had a year old profile and no verifications. And there's enough great profiles that are verified that I don't feel inclined to invest my time with people who aren't trying. |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?"
Only be a red flag if you allow it to be. Anything can be a red flag even if its not one. |
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By *enatton2Couple
over a year ago
West Midlands |
Yeah it might be a little unfair but we won’t meet someone without a veri, regardless of how long they’ve been on the site. We just need some reassurance that they are actually serious about meeting. |
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There could be a dozen reasons why someone has been here a year and not verified so it's really unfair to judge without knowing those reasons. It wouldn't put me off meeting someone if I was attracted to them. |
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"How about....... joined 8hrs ago showing verifications. That pops up on my feed on a regular basis and Ive got to think thats even more iffy."
Why is it?, if I leave and return I get several vericaftions within a short space of time. It just means that I've been here before and people reverify me, if someone wants to read into that it's up to them... |
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"How about....... joined 8hrs ago showing verifications. That pops up on my feed on a regular basis and Ive got to think thats even more iffy.
Why is it?, if I leave and return I get several vericaftions within a short space of time. It just means that I've been here before and people reverify me, if someone wants to read into that it's up to them..."
I got several veris the first 2days I joined as had been going to swingers clubs before I had even heard of fab. People are too quick to judge on here. |
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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
We trust our instincts much more than a verification, so no verification even after a year, would be fine with us. We only ever meet for a social first so verifications have little meaning to us. |
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"How about....... joined 8hrs ago showing verifications. That pops up on my feed on a regular basis and Ive got to think thats even more iffy.
Why is it?, if I leave and return I get several vericaftions within a short space of time. It just means that I've been here before and people reverify me, if someone wants to read into that it's up to them...
I got several veris the first 2days I joined as had been going to swingers clubs before I had even heard of fab. People are too quick to judge on here."
Absolutely they are, I've been using fab on no off for 7 years, had ppl in the past knock me back for getting a few veris on the first day of setting up a new account |
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"How about....... joined 8hrs ago showing verifications. That pops up on my feed on a regular basis and Ive got to think thats even more iffy.
Why is it?, if I leave and return I get several vericaftions within a short space of time. It just means that I've been here before and people reverify me, if someone wants to read into that it's up to them..."
It's all about probabilities and where people choose to focus their time in terms of chatting and trying to meet as can't do with everyone. Veris are a part of that for me, a quick filter, especially with couples and ladies as so many fake ones. |
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"Yeah a year no meets seems excessive
I'd be suspicious
Sometimes it's difficult to get meets etc but that's crazy "
If you’re on a year and not bumped into anyone, you’re lazy can’t be arse fake sat wanking annoying those who do. |
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We still do not have a Veri nor have we yet met anyone via this site. We are now near the time to renew our support. We have have chatted to a few people on Fab.
We also have nothing to prove (to ourselves or anyone else). We have our own reasons for being here and are willing to wait until its right for us both. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We took a few years to be verified, we met a guy but then he left so it disappeared.
We didn't have a lot of spare time to be active and when we were, we were met with a lot of absolute time wasters.
We recently went to a club but didn't get verifications from anyone there.
We are genuine so I don't think that everyone who isn't verified isn't bonified |
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
It isn't a red flag for me, I'm not bothered if someone is verified or not could be all sorts of reasons why they aren't verified. I like to make my own mind up about someone through chatting and getting to know them. |
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"I often get messages from guys. They are site supporters, photo verified but not meet verified. Obviously it’s over a year or more but is it that hard, especially with socials or webcams? (not keen on these). I know many will say we all use fab differently, forums, friends etc but these guys are actively trying to meet me.
Would that be a red flag?
I recently asked for some profile feedback from a local couple and one of their suggestions was to hide my verifications . Equally there are threads on the forums talking about whether people actually like to get verifications any more. I guess it’s different for everyone. All I would suggest it’s verifications alone should not influence whether you interact with someone regarding a possible meet. You will have other factors that you consider important and they should probably take precedence
For a single male wanting to meet outside of clubs or organised social events, verifications are important (but not crucial) and in my opinion one of the cornerstones of Fab. Veris compliment having a nice set of photos and an engaging profile and sets you apart from the hoards of other single guy profiles. Think of it like the Amazon of swinging, sure, you could search for a thing, read the blurb, check out the pictures and buy it even though it’s had zero reviews but reading other buyer positive reviews and comments makes you more confident about pressing the buy button…
By having a good set of veris it shows that you do actually meet (not a time wasting, fantasist keyboard wanker), shows the type of people you meet (who doesn’t scan the profiles of the verifiers? “Oh he’s met that lovely couple we know, cool, let’s message him”) and together with supporting comments and the compliments paid, that you’re active (with recent meets taking place).
"
What he said |
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I've been verified by 4 people/couples, however three have left the site. So I only have one now. I think there are a number of reasons why someone might not be verified; some genuine and some not so much. I understand if someone has a straight up delete policy, but if you feel inclined could be worth a chat. |
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I've been on here over a year, I do have a couple of webcam verifies and 1 social. It's hard to get meets without being verified. I'd say don't tar everyone with the same brush. As others have said give people a chance and chat to them and make your own mind up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We haven’t got any because we haven’t indulged yet. It’s as simple as that. C.
Exactly. I have had to be patient to want to meet someone. "
Same boat. I've found moment I ask to meet its radio silence or I get asked how big my cock is and because it isn't more than 8 inches it's a no go.  |
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By *renzMan
over a year ago
Between Chichester and Havant |
I've been 'on' here for a couple of years now and only have one verification from over a year ago. But that's because during that time I have spent a couple of those years away, but very similar to having no verifications at all.
Personally if I never have another meet, it wouldn't bother me, when I was on under a different name many years ago I had many verifications and had a lot of fun. Now I would rather meet the 'right' person or couple and am quite happy to wait for them, even if it never happens. |
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"I've been verified by 4 people/couples, however three have left the site. So I only have one now. I think there are a number of reasons why someone might not be verified; some genuine and some not so much. I understand if someone has a straight up delete policy, but if you feel inclined could be worth a chat."
Sadly a majority can't see past the "No meet verifications " on a single blokes profile.
Many are happy to sit in judgement of single blokes who ,forever reason havnt managed to have a meet ,and call us time wasters ,yet won't give us a chance themselves.
Seems a lot have short memories, and have forgot they once had no meet verifications themselves . |
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"Yeah a year no meets seems excessive
I'd be suspicious
Sometimes it's difficult to get meets etc but that's crazy
If you’re on a year and not bumped into anyone, you’re lazy can’t be arse fake sat wanking annoying those who do. "
Wow ,just wow.
As a single bloke who has been on Fab well over a year, who puts time and effort into my profile and photos ,with no meets what so ever ,to be described as a fake and lazy is staggering.
I would love a meet, even just a one on one social for a coffee or bite to eat in a public setting . I use Fab daily ,post on the forums daily to try and be involved in the community and make new friends .I'm not lazy ,or a fake as you call us .
I would have loved to have had a meet long before now ,even just a social ,but it hasn't happened .
But to tar all us who have had no meets after a year on here as fake and lazy is disgusting in my opinion .
|
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There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances?"
Don't think anyone is denying that. |
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"There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances?
Don't think anyone is denying that."
My question still stands. Why are the guys who can't get a meet on fab after a year still here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances?
Don't think anyone is denying that.
My question still stands. Why are the guys who can't get a meet on fab after a year still here?"
Think ud need to ask them but my guess is the chat rooms and talking to like minded people. |
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"There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances?
Don't think anyone is denying that.
My question still stands. Why are the guys who can't get a meet on fab after a year still here?
Think ud need to ask them but my guess is the chat rooms and talking to like minded people. "
And so then... Why be constantly bemoaning the fact that they can't get a meet? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's a logical extension to the OP question too.
If you've been on Fab for over a year and still no meets and you've tried everything you can to the best of your ability, why are you still here?
And do you think constantly bemoaning the fact that you can't get a meet on the forum is going to help your chances?
Don't think anyone is denying that.
My question still stands. Why are the guys who can't get a meet on fab after a year still here?
Think ud need to ask them but my guess is the chat rooms and talking to like minded people.
And so then... Why be constantly bemoaning the fact that they can't get a meet?"
That one is on them. |
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I've been on her about three years, got a few cam veris but no actual meets. Various reasons, although my wife isn't bothered I still have kids in the house who are very much aware of my limited social life so I can't just come and go as I please without questions being asked. Also I'm looking for one or two reasonably local couples and preferably a bit inexperienced like me. I'm not interested in clubs, socials, etc. Therefore I haven't spent my time actively writing to loads of people. My choice. I have friends on here I chat to and I enjoy the forums and occasional foray into the chat rooms. Again, my choice. I pay my subs, I'm polite and friendly to other people and very honest (unlike many other people on here) so it's up to me what I do on here and not up to others to judge. One day I might find that elusive couple but until then I'll do what I like on here. |
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