FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Well, that was a waste of bloody time!! [edited for grammar]
Well, that was a waste of bloody time!! [edited for grammar]
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It used to bother me when I first was on here - now if that's what it is meant to be it is
Just focus on finding someone who does want to make better use of your time and efforts |
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By *ickD80Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them? |
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"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me."
so what you are saying is if you don't get your own way you may as well just abuse the person. There is no place in this world for verbally or messaging something abusive texts and maybe every lady on here should block you for that statement you wrote. |
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I see op frustration he obviously was getting a connection going with someone and he said it was normal chat mixed in too so to then get blocked of course his gonna be frustrated i notice on here its quick to judge on a post and taken outta context, my advice is just be yourself if your nice person stay that nice person and your maybe find someone on here. There are some really genuine nice women on here I've come across, but agree with a few just because one or two are not nice there are also one or two who are nice, so don't go down road of being nasty. Good luck. Out. |
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By *4bimMan
over a year ago
Farnborough Hampshire |
Don't get drawn into long conversations that go nowhere.
In my experience people who want to meet get on with it not keep it on messages.
Judge people on actions not words. |
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"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me."
I don't think it's a great plan to be nice to people just to get what you want.
It has to work both ways I'd say. |
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Of course there's a point in being nice.
People aren't just nice to get sex which is what your insinuating.
If that was too much effort go to the opposite end and see where that gets you.
People are allowed to change their minds, yes it's frustrating but it doesn't mean stop sending nice messages.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would hope that people are nice because they genuinely are and not only because they want something at the end of it. If that's the case then your not as nice as you first thought.
I get it it's annoying and frustrating but why let others actions colour you as a person. You don't know them not really these people are not good friends or family so just block back and move on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me."
It's shit to be blocked after chatting for a while.
However it's also shit to suggest the only reason to be nice is to get a fuck. Perhaps they realised this about you. |
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
"It's disappointing and I understand your frustration but the point of being nice is because you are nice surely "
This, if youe xpect a reward or you are being nice simply to get something you want, then you are not nice, surely.
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I have only ever blocked people I'm chatting to if they get pushy or start with continuous sex talk.I will ask them to stop if they don't then I block them.
And while yes I get you might be annoyed that you got blocked and you can't think why. They obviously had a reason to block you and it could be anything.
But in saying that it seems like you are saying that you are only nice in order to get a meet and maybe they saw through that facade if that is the case. |
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You might have the wrong site, www.disney.com is probably what you're looking for. The other person doesn't owe you anything. They made a decision you weren't for them and simply moved on. It doesn't matter what the reason is. |
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Op it could be due to lots of things.They changed their mind,life got busy ,they Have other things going on.
Don't try and work people out on here or dwell on it too much.
I know it can be disheartening though. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them?"
That isn't what I said at all, and you'd know that if you took the time to read what I'd written properly and with more care.
I have little or no preconception about what chatting to someone may bring. Anything 'naughty' that may happen is always a bonus, of course, but what I don't get is the suddenness of it all. The fact that literally, we were communicating really well and then all of a sudden they vanished. I myself would only ever do that if someone was abusing, threatening or annoying me, and that wasn't happening. So, if people are just going to be like that, why bother?
THAT is my point. |
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By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
"So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them?
That isn't what I said at all, and you'd know that if you took the time to read what I'd written properly and with more care.
I have little or no preconception about what chatting to someone may bring. Anything 'naughty' that may happen is always a bonus, of course, but what I don't get is the suddenness of it all. The fact that literally, we were communicating really well and then all of a sudden they vanished. I myself would only ever do that if someone was abusing, threatening or annoying me, and that wasn't happening. So, if people are just going to be like that, why bother?
THAT is my point."
Ive had to be the blocker in a similar situation because although the conversation is good I discovered new things about the person that wasn’t for me. Its easier to block than explain and potentially get abuse/insults thrown at you.
Just trying to give the other viewpoint. I know it can be shit at times but I wouldn’t take it to heart |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me.so what you are saying is if you don't get your own way you may as well just abuse the person. There is no place in this world for verbally or messaging something abusive texts and maybe every lady on here should block you for that statement you wrote. "
What's "my own way"? If by that you mean politeness and coutesy, then no, I don't think that's too much to ask. In fact, even being told to sod off is more polite than being blocked. At least that way, there can be no two ways about it and you've not been made to feel like you don't exist.
On the other hand, the one positive thing to glean from the experience could be that I dodged a bullet by not getting as far as meeting that person. Who knows, in real life our conversation may not have lasted more than five minutes. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I would hope that people are nice because they genuinely are and not only because they want something at the end of it. If that's the case then your not as nice as you first thought.
I get it it's annoying and frustrating but why let others actions colour you as a person. You don't know them not really these people are not good friends or family so just block back and move on. "
As far as I know, you can't block back if you've alreacdy been blocked- what would be the point?
The point I'm trying to illustrate here, which seems to go over people's heads, is that in every walk of life, not just this one- work, family, even down to day to day activities such as shopping etc- I am consistently amazed at how rude people are. It IS a malaise of modern society, regardless of what people may think, and I think social media has only made it worse. So, when you start talking to someone politely on a site like this for 'like minded people', exchange lots of nice messages, and then they just completely blank you, you do start to wonder what the point of it all is. Apart from anything else, I'm sure the majority of us have plenty of real life concerns, and it's not like we have nothing better to do than sit PMing people!
In short, I'm always nice. But there is also that old agae that nice guys finish last- and the older I get, the more I ponder it. |
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"I would hope that people are nice because they genuinely are and not only because they want something at the end of it. If that's the case then your not as nice as you first thought.
I get it it's annoying and frustrating but why let others actions colour you as a person. You don't know them not really these people are not good friends or family so just block back and move on.
As far as I know, you can't block back if you've alreacdy been blocked- what would be the point?
The point I'm trying to illustrate here, which seems to go over people's heads, is that in every walk of life, not just this one- work, family, even down to day to day activities such as shopping etc- I am consistently amazed at how rude people are. It IS a malaise of modern society, regardless of what people may think, and I think social media has only made it worse. So, when you start talking to someone politely on a site like this for 'like minded people', exchange lots of nice messages, and then they just completely blank you, you do start to wonder what the point of it all is. Apart from anything else, I'm sure the majority of us have plenty of real life concerns, and it's not like we have nothing better to do than sit PMing people!
In short, I'm always nice. But there is also that old agae that nice guys finish last- and the older I get, the more I ponder it. "
Why would you want to be rude? It's only a perception that being a cunt gets you places. I'd prefer to be nice and picked by one or two, then be nasty to appeal to an unpleasant bunch of people  |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me.
It's shit to be blocked after chatting for a while.
However it's also shit to suggest the only reason to be nice is to get a fuck. Perhaps they realised this about you."
I never said that, though, did I? Show me the place in my opening post where it says ANYTHING remotely like that. And, as I take pains to point out, we didn't discuss that in our messages either. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I would hope that people are nice because they genuinely are and not only because they want something at the end of it. If that's the case then your not as nice as you first thought.
I get it it's annoying and frustrating but why let others actions colour you as a person. You don't know them not really these people are not good friends or family so just block back and move on.
As far as I know, you can't block back if you've alreacdy been blocked- what would be the point?
The point I'm trying to illustrate here, which seems to go over people's heads, is that in every walk of life, not just this one- work, family, even down to day to day activities such as shopping etc- I am consistently amazed at how rude people are. It IS a malaise of modern society, regardless of what people may think, and I think social media has only made it worse. So, when you start talking to someone politely on a site like this for 'like minded people', exchange lots of nice messages, and then they just completely blank you, you do start to wonder what the point of it all is. Apart from anything else, I'm sure the majority of us have plenty of real life concerns, and it's not like we have nothing better to do than sit PMing people!
In short, I'm always nice. But there is also that old agae that nice guys finish last- and the older I get, the more I ponder it.
Why would you want to be rude? It's only a perception that being a cunt gets you places. I'd prefer to be nice and picked by one or two, then be nasty to appeal to an unpleasant bunch of people "
I suppose it's my general cynicism about the way society is going, and has been for years. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I would hope that people are nice because they genuinely are and not only because they want something at the end of it. If that's the case then your not as nice as you first thought.
I get it it's annoying and frustrating but why let others actions colour you as a person. You don't know them not really these people are not good friends or family so just block back and move on.
As far as I know, you can't block back if you've alreacdy been blocked- what would be the point?
The point I'm trying to illustrate here, which seems to go over people's heads, is that in every walk of life, not just this one- work, family, even down to day to day activities such as shopping etc- I am consistently amazed at how rude people are. It IS a malaise of modern society, regardless of what people may think, and I think social media has only made it worse. So, when you start talking to someone politely on a site like this for 'like minded people', exchange lots of nice messages, and then they just completely blank you, you do start to wonder what the point of it all is. Apart from anything else, I'm sure the majority of us have plenty of real life concerns, and it's not like we have nothing better to do than sit PMing people!
In short, I'm always nice. But there is also that old agae that nice guys finish last- and the older I get, the more I ponder it. "
PS That should of course read 'adage' This keyboard has a mind of its own. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm offering free popcorn to all viewers of this thread! These types of threads have been coming in full force recently!"
I'll take mine with loads of butter and salt please |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them?
That isn't what I said at all, and you'd know that if you took the time to read what I'd written properly and with more care.
I have little or no preconception about what chatting to someone may bring. Anything 'naughty' that may happen is always a bonus, of course, but what I don't get is the suddenness of it all. The fact that literally, we were communicating really well and then all of a sudden they vanished. I myself would only ever do that if someone was abusing, threatening or annoying me, and that wasn't happening. So, if people are just going to be like that, why bother?
THAT is my point.
Ive had to be the blocker in a similar situation because although the conversation is good I discovered new things about the person that wasn’t for me. Its easier to block than explain and potentially get abuse/insults thrown at you.
Just trying to give the other viewpoint. I know it can be shit at times but I wouldn’t take it to heart "
Now THAT sounds like a more balanced viewpoint, as opposed to some of the other reactions I've received here!!
Though from a personal viewpoint, I would still rather be told something along the lines of "look, I'm not really into this, so can we leave it here thanks" than just get the sudden block. To me, it's like buying a cassette [showing my age now!] and having it chew up before the end. Although at least you can hopefully replace it with one of the same, whereas in this case it's probably best not to. |
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Being "Nice" is a double edged sword as if like us you do try to be "Nice" and even "Polite" most then take it as you are up for some "Sexy Fun" and if you do chat the same goes and so most couples ( including us) are very very very wary of chatting to "Single Males" but we do and even "Couples" can be just as bad though so carry on being polite though as the site does need more people who are and have more than a passsing interest in manners/social skills and god forbid a sense of humour !!! and finally a full understanding of the words they put on their profile's xxx ps yes we are indeed 100% aware of our so called bar being set high but xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them?"
this is exactly how I read it ...only being nice to get what you want ...
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"Op it could be due to lots of things.They changed their mind,life got busy ,they Have other things going on.
Don't try and work people out on here or dwell on it too much.
I know it can be disheartening though."
Another non-judgmental, balanced and fair reply. Maybe there are still some perceptive people out there after all! Who knows, my faith in human nature may be restored yet. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
" Being "Nice" is a double edged sword as if like us you do try to be "Nice" and even "Polite" most then take it as you are up for some "Sexy Fun" and if you do chat the same goes and so most couples ( including us) are very very very wary of chatting to "Single Males" but we do and even "Couples" can be just as bad though so carry on being polite though as the site does need more people who are and have more than a passsing interest in manners/social skills and god forbid a sense of humour !!! and finally a full understanding of the words they put on their profile's xxx ps yes we are indeed 100% aware of our so called bar being set high but xxx"
That's the third fair-minded and balanced reply I've now received on this thread. Wonders will never cease!! |
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By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
"So basically what you’re saying is that you don’t see the point in being pleasant to someone if they aren’t going to give you what you want? You’re annoyed that you’ve been respectful to someone for a couple of days but you haven’t got any sex off them in return? You think that it’s only worth talking politely to someone on here if you eventually get to have sex with them and if they aren’t going to have sex with you then you might as well verbally abuse them rather than saying anything nice to them?
That isn't what I said at all, and you'd know that if you took the time to read what I'd written properly and with more care.
I have little or no preconception about what chatting to someone may bring. Anything 'naughty' that may happen is always a bonus, of course, but what I don't get is the suddenness of it all. The fact that literally, we were communicating really well and then all of a sudden they vanished. I myself would only ever do that if someone was abusing, threatening or annoying me, and that wasn't happening. So, if people are just going to be like that, why bother?
THAT is my point.
Ive had to be the blocker in a similar situation because although the conversation is good I discovered new things about the person that wasn’t for me. Its easier to block than explain and potentially get abuse/insults thrown at you.
Just trying to give the other viewpoint. I know it can be shit at times but I wouldn’t take it to heart
Now THAT sounds like a more balanced viewpoint, as opposed to some of the other reactions I've received here!!
Though from a personal viewpoint, I would still rather be told something along the lines of "look, I'm not really into this, so can we leave it here thanks" than just get the sudden block. To me, it's like buying a cassette [showing my age now!] and having it chew up before the end. Although at least you can hopefully replace it with one of the same, whereas in this case it's probably best not to."
For me even personally ive tried both ways and i have to say the blocking one is probably the nicest one for me because ive been called every name under the sun and it really takes its toll on you. Its so difficult to know what people are capable of so you do presume the worst and hope for the best situation
I would look at it as a more of a no thank you than a block because it is essentially that. I wouldn’t take it to heart as there will be someone out there. |
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Pretending to be something you're not inevitably leads to lying and getting caught out.
This is meant to be fun. I don't care if that makes me 'last', as long as I can look at myself in a mirror and know that I like the person who looks back |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"You might have the wrong site, www.disney.com is probably what you're looking for. The other person doesn't owe you anything. They made a decision you weren't for them and simply moved on. It doesn't matter what the reason is."
Now that's the sort of comment that could lead to ME issuing a blocking.
I'd probably tell you I was going to do it first though, out of courtesy. |
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By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
"Pretending to be something you're not inevitably leads to lying and getting caught out.
This is meant to be fun. I don't care if that makes me 'last', as long as I can look at myself in a mirror and know that I like the person who looks back "
Well said! Theres no point in trying to be someone else because its so tiresome and people will like you for you.
You cant be everyones cup of tea but there is someone out there for you |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"Of course there's a point in being nice.
People aren't just nice to get sex which is what your insinuating.
If that was too much effort go to the opposite end and see where that gets you.
People are allowed to change their minds, yes it's frustrating but it doesn't mean stop sending nice messages.
Mrs "
Yet again, another person who misread.
I'm always nice to people, it's my natural instinct. I'm just given to wonder- repeatedly, as it goes - why I do this when so many people are not ince in return. I'm not a Christian at all, but if he DID exist, then 'do unto others' and all that does seem like a fair exchange, and a decent principle to adopt. So therefore, I often ponder whether the opposite also applies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You might have the wrong site, www.disney.com is probably what you're looking for. The other person doesn't owe you anything. They made a decision you weren't for them and simply moved on. It doesn't matter what the reason is.
Now that's the sort of comment that could lead to ME issuing a blocking.
I'd probably tell you I was going to do it first though, out of courtesy."
oh dear well at least you said it first so they won't be crushed and start a whole thread about it  |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
I also think, having replied to some of the misjudged comments above [and some of the fairer ones] that we're all overlooking a basic point here- namely, that the MAJORITY of us on this site are here to meet people, whether socially or in any other way. If someone isn't, they usually say so on their profile.
I mean, sue me if I've misunderstood, buit is not getting to know people who share your interests what joining this site is all about in the first place? If it isn't, then why would you have to fill in a profile that states who you are and what you're looking for [and also what you're not looking for?] And of COURSE single people - men, women, and trans- are going to hope that they'll discover someone with whom they make 'that connection'
If I just want sex, there are plenty of clubs I can go to to find it. And trust me, even as an overweight single guy in my forties, I very often meet some wonderful people with whom I enjoy myself. And I hope they feel the same way too. But at the same time, a great many of the couples I talk to do tell me they met through sites such as this- so there's no harm in me, or any other single person, trying to do the same.
After all, lets we forget, that's precisely what the blocker said they were doing too.
Right. I'm done for the day, real life beckons. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"You might have the wrong site, www.disney.com is probably what you're looking for. The other person doesn't owe you anything. They made a decision you weren't for them and simply moved on. It doesn't matter what the reason is.
Now that's the sort of comment that could lead to ME issuing a blocking.
I'd probably tell you I was going to do it first though, out of courtesy. oh dear well at least you said it first so they won't be crushed and start a whole thread about it "
This WILL now be followed by an immediate block. |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me."
move on Mr angry  |
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Well said Nick. I'm polite when someone messages, always make my intentions clear. Starts off pleasant enough and then the abuse when I refuse to give my number or meet is downright scarey. Some men feel entitled to sex on here |
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By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
"Well said Nick. I'm polite when someone messages, always make my intentions clear. Starts off pleasant enough and then the abuse when I refuse to give my number or meet is downright scarey. Some men feel entitled to sex on here"
Its the entitlement that really does it for like no X im not going to drop my whole life for you today |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
Well, I've certainly never verbally abused anyone, demanded their number or asked them to drop everything and meet me. And I'm certainly not the sort of bloke that comes on here making deliberately crude carnal comments. I mean, if others want to, that's their prerogative- but please credit me with a little more decorum and respect than that. |
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By *immylea OP Man
over a year ago
Derby |
"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me.move on Mr angry "
I think 'Mr Bewildered And Perplexed' is a more accurate description. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You might have the wrong site, www.disney.com is probably what you're looking for. The other person doesn't owe you anything. They made a decision you weren't for them and simply moved on. It doesn't matter what the reason is.
Now that's the sort of comment that could lead to ME issuing a blocking.
I'd probably tell you I was going to do it first though, out of courtesy. oh dear well at least you said it first so they won't be crushed and start a whole thread about it
This WILL now be followed by an immediate block."
oh no I'm distraught truly |
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There’s plenty of salt coming from op for my popcorn.
Op, you may think people are misreading what you’ve said but the entire vibe you’re giving off is one of ‘I was nice and she blocked me, why do I bother’
Nice is the bare minimum humans should expect from each other, it doesn’t entitle us to anything from anyone else.
Sometimes I’ll have been feeling a conversation and then realise that it’s not for me. Trying to explain that without the resulting either abuse or attempts at trying to change my mind can be tiring so I may choose to block instead.
The term ‘nice guy’ coming from someone about themselves, for me, has more often than not become a red flag. It usually means I’ll be nice until I don’t need to be then at best I’ll be nothing and at worst be horrific.
Good luck in your future endeavours, I’m off to eat my popcorn. |
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Just to add, recently a self proclaimed nice guy got aggressive with me when I asked him to stop messaging something I didn’t like I’d asked him 4 times already and on the 5th time I got stronger with my message to stop. He didn’t like hearing no and saw his arse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just to add, recently a self proclaimed nice guy got aggressive with me when I asked him to stop messaging something I didn’t like I’d asked him 4 times already and on the 5th time I got stronger with my message to stop. He didn’t like hearing no and saw his arse. "
you let it get to 5th ? if you message once with something offensive or stupid you are blocked ...I used to be nicer but it gets you nowhere they never take no for an answer and you get abused.
|
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"Just to add, recently a self proclaimed nice guy got aggressive with me when I asked him to stop messaging something I didn’t like I’d asked him 4 times already and on the 5th time I got stronger with my message to stop. He didn’t like hearing no and saw his arse. you let it get to 5th ? if you message once with something offensive or stupid you are blocked ...I used to be nicer but it gets you nowhere they never take no for an answer and you get abused. "
I know, that was my bad. I kind of didn’t fully notice the pattern until too late. I’m definitely getting tougher though haha |
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By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
"Just to add, recently a self proclaimed nice guy got aggressive with me when I asked him to stop messaging something I didn’t like I’d asked him 4 times already and on the 5th time I got stronger with my message to stop. He didn’t like hearing no and saw his arse. you let it get to 5th ? if you message once with something offensive or stupid you are blocked ...I used to be nicer but it gets you nowhere they never take no for an answer and you get abused.
I know, that was my bad. I kind of didn’t fully notice the pattern until too late. I’m definitely getting tougher though haha "
Its a mistake we all learn the hard way i think speaking to a lot of people. Its such a shame that such a small minority can ruin it for a lot of folk |
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"Just to add, recently a self proclaimed nice guy got aggressive with me when I asked him to stop messaging something I didn’t like I’d asked him 4 times already and on the 5th time I got stronger with my message to stop. He didn’t like hearing no and saw his arse. you let it get to 5th ? if you message once with something offensive or stupid you are blocked ...I used to be nicer but it gets you nowhere they never take no for an answer and you get abused.
I know, that was my bad. I kind of didn’t fully notice the pattern until too late. I’m definitely getting tougher though haha
Its a mistake we all learn the hard way i think speaking to a lot of people. Its such a shame that such a small minority can ruin it for a lot of folk"
Agreed |
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By *evonrobMan
over a year ago
Kingsbridge |
"I honestly don't get it. You spend several days exchanging messages with someone, speaking to them politely, them speaking back to you politely [if admittedly in slightly less detail] getting on very well, talking about a mixture of vanilla and kink stuff, nothing heavy, just nice conversation...then you both go away to do separate things for the bank holiday, and when you come back several days later, you're blocked!!
I mean, is there ANY point in being nice to people here if that's all it's going to result in? You might as well just send them a torrent of verbal abuse for all the good it does. That is, of course, assuming they're who they say they are in the same place - there are so many sock puppet profiles, one never truly knows.
I despair, I truly do. The complications of modern life are clearly not for me."
I think the word on here is “ momentum”. With so many to choose from on here once you lose momentum you’re stuffed! As you seem to have found! |
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