FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > So, which way to go?
So, which way to go?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Granted that not everybody wants the same thing, I’m sure there must be some general consensus…
I see a lot of women on here say they don’t want endless chat/penpals, but in the same token, you get women who say they wanna talk to get to know you more or see if there’s chemistry before meeting, “Let’s talk some more here first.” And when you wanna set up a meet, it’s always “I’m busy.”
Me personally, I don’t care for endless back and forth and would rather set a meet after some reasonable amount of chat established, but the whole “talk some more” tripe often goes nowhere, hence I don’t bother.
What is the happy medium? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Granted that not everybody wants the same thing, I’m sure there must be some general consensus…
I see a lot of women on here say they don’t want endless chat/penpals, but in the same token, you get women who say they wanna talk to get to know you more or see if there’s chemistry before meeting, “Let’s talk some more here first.” And when you wanna set up a meet, it’s always “I’m busy.”
Me personally, I don’t care for endless back and forth and would rather set a meet after some reasonable amount of chat established, but the whole “talk some more” tripe often goes nowhere, hence I don’t bother.
What is the happy medium?"
If they say they want to talk more they are not that into you.
They just like your attention,
Cut loose of them and that might get their attention. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"they are not that into you.
They just like your attention,
Cut loose of them and that might get their attention. "
Yeah, you answered me with what I already thought to be honest. I gathered it might be that. At least I can cut it sooner if this really is the case. Can’t be arsed wasting time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"they are not that into you.
They just like your attention,
Cut loose of them and that might get their attention.
Yeah, you answered me with what I already thought to be honest. I gathered it might be that. At least I can cut it sooner if this really is the case. Can’t be arsed wasting time. "
Time is money.
The Brad Pitt rule applies.
If he asked them out would they be too busy?
No.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Time is money.
The Brad Pitt rule applies.
If he asked them out would they be too busy?
No.
Precisely."
They give you a no.
Don't respond to them and withdraw all attention.
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If you don't want to talk more...don't. It really is that easy.
Some women genuinely like to have a bit of a connection with a guy they're going to have sex with if you're not prepared to invest time in them you're not compatible |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you don't want to talk more...don't. It really is that easy.
Some women genuinely like to have a bit of a connection with a guy they're going to have sex with if you're not prepared to invest time in them you're not compatible"
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Granted that not everybody wants the same thing, I’m sure there must be some general consensus…
I see a lot of women on here say they don’t want endless chat/penpals, but in the same token, you get women who say they wanna talk to get to know you more or see if there’s chemistry before meeting, “Let’s talk some more here first.” And when you wanna set up a meet, it’s always “I’m busy.”
Me personally, I don’t care for endless back and forth and would rather set a meet after some reasonable amount of chat established, but the whole “talk some more” tripe often goes nowhere, hence I don’t bother.
What is the happy medium?"
Some people like to see if their actual is a good connection which can take some time given on the level of communication and how in-depth wouldn't you rather have something in common before meeting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also I have as much interest in Brad Pitt as he has in me
You'd be more Hugh Grant I'm guessing?
 . No.
Jimmy Smits or Goran Visnjic are more likely to attract my attention"
NYPD Blue and E.R
You have good taste in shows. |
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"Also I have as much interest in Brad Pitt as he has in me
You'd be more Hugh Grant I'm guessing?
. No.
Jimmy Smits or Goran Visnjic are more likely to attract my attention NYPD Blue and E.R
You have good taste in shows. "
I have good taste in men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also I have as much interest in Brad Pitt as he has in me
You'd be more Hugh Grant I'm guessing?
. No.
Jimmy Smits or Goran Visnjic are more likely to attract my attention NYPD Blue and E.R
You have good taste in shows.
I have good taste in men "
You'd be putting on your best gladrags for them. |
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"Also I have as much interest in Brad Pitt as he has in me
You'd be more Hugh Grant I'm guessing?
. No.
Jimmy Smits or Goran Visnjic are more likely to attract my attention NYPD Blue and E.R
You have good taste in shows.
I have good taste in men
You'd be putting on your best gladrags for them. "
I'm not holding my breath |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a woman myself, have you considered the fact that the women you are talking to might be new to the scene and nervous? I'm part of a couple, but if I were a single woman I'd want to know as much as possible about the man before I would meet in person, its one thing to think wow he's nice looking at pictures, but it's a all new ball game when it comes to personalities, I know that we are all here for fun and frolics, but to a woman she needs to feel safe and have some idea as to the person's personality, an example from my personal experience ( when I was single ) I met a chap who I thought was gorgeous, sadly he turned out to be arrogant, loved himself and was all about himself and what he wanted, don't get me wrong thankfully these type of men a few and far between, there are lots of fantastic respectful men out there, so just keep in mind that there could be a very good reason why some women want to get to know you before they take the leap. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As a woman myself, have you considered the fact that the women you are talking to might be new to the scene and nervous? I'm part of a couple, but if I were a single woman I'd want to know as much as possible about the man before I would meet in person, its one thing to think wow he's nice looking at pictures, but it's a all new ball game when it comes to personalities, I know that we are all here for fun and frolics, but to a woman she needs to feel safe and have some idea as to the person's personality, an example from my personal experience ( when I was single ) I met a chap who I thought was gorgeous, sadly he turned out to be arrogant, loved himself and was all about himself and what he wanted, don't get me wrong thankfully these type of men a few and far between, there are lots of fantastic respectful men out there, so just keep in mind that there could be a very good reason why some women want to get to know you before they take the leap."
I can appreciate all that, but I guess it’s just frustrating when you’re talking talking talking and things end up going nowhere, or when they don’t want to be “penpals” – how does one exactly get to know them without talking or meeting? Plus I’m speaking on women have been on here for a good while or are somewhat versed in this thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If the women you are talking to have been on here for a long time, then I'm guessing that they are not interested but like someone else said earlier, they love the attention, I can imagine that it's very difficult for single men on here to get to the stage of meeting a woman, unfortunately we as women have the pick of the bunch so to speak, men see pics of the women and think wow I'd definitely play with her, you message or wink, and either get ignored or rejected, us women are more likely to get into conversation or invited to meet, this is because we can pick and choose as there are more men than there are women on the site. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If the women you are talking to have been on here for a long time, then I'm guessing that they are not interested but like someone else said earlier, they love the attention, I can imagine that it's very difficult for single men on here to get to the stage of meeting a woman, unfortunately we as women have the pick of the bunch so to speak, men see pics of the women and think wow I'd definitely play with her, you message or wink, and either get ignored or rejected, us women are more likely to get into conversation or invited to meet, this is because we can pick and choose as there are more men than there are women on the site."
Coorrrect! |
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