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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice "
You have no pics. 99% of people will not reply to a profile with no pics |
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We get a lot of messages as a couple, so we can only imagine how many single women get. You need to stand out more - pics and a more detailed profile is a start. We wouldn’t engage with someone we can’t see. We always check out people’s veris, too (though that’s often a catch-22 for single guys). |
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Most people look at profiles before they decide if they're going to open the message so if they don't have a lot to work with the they will ignore the message and move on to the next.
It's not all about numbers but it can be.
It's not all about content either but it can be.
It's all about presenting the best of you in your shop window so they don't have to go inside to see what you're selling.
Telling people your are respectful and physically appealing will never work because it's subjective and up to them to decide |
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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago
Up North |
"I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice
You have no pics. 99% of people will not reply to a profile with no pics"
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For me, I have my filters up nearly all of the time. If I lift them because I want to join in something on the forum I can literally receive maybe 30 messages in as many minutes.
Mostly from people who haven't read my profile.
Many of those do remain unopened so I have to admit I don't actually know necessarily much about many of these people.
I find the best way to start chatting is from a forum post rather than a random message. |
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"I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice "
who says your good looking ? |
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You have the dreaded silhouette pic which is a no for anyone who is actually interested in you from any messages you might send as it's off putting and makes it look like you have something to hide |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi all. Thank you for your valuable advice. I will take it on board and adjust my profile accordingly. Always been reluctant to put my pic up as I would be mortified if a colleague or client etc saw me! But agreed with advice given |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice "
How long have you joined the site?? If you're new then you're unlikely to get any responses for now |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
"I'm curious to know how many messages ladies recieve whilst logged on? I've recently messaged a few ladies who have taken my interest but 95% of messages are unread, wondering is it due to the sheer volume ladies recieve? Some read without a reply back. Messages are always respectful and I genuinely read profile, what I don't get is I'm a good looking guy with a great physique and well endowed, also send pics. Baffles me as not to sound disrespectful I physically alot more attractive than the verification meets and polite. Crazy times! Please don't slate me. Just advice
You have no pics. 99% of people will not reply to a profile with no pics"
Totally this for me . |
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I'm another who won't be interested in a profile with no pictures. Like you, I wouldn't want my clients or colleagues to recognise me but my photos are pretty anonymous - it is possible to have pics that keep a level of privacy.
One thing I personally steer clear of is profiles which tell me I should "just ask"... |
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By *ebwizMan
over a year ago
Clevedon |
"And also a single male not being able to accomm usually means that they have a wife or partner at home who knows nothing about your extracurricular activities "
This really gets on my nerves this opinion. For some if not a lot of us in say 40s and 40s we have teenage or young adults living at home and due to school, uni or yhere own work patterns that they don't communicate to you we arent going to risk accommodating, and them walk in on something they probably would prefer not to see, and yes i am married, and my wife knows, we used to have a couples profile, dont be so bloody judgemental. |
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By *ebwizMan
over a year ago
Clevedon |
"And also a single male not being able to accomm usually means that they have a wife or partner at home who knows nothing about your extracurricular activities
This really gets on my nerves this opinion. For some if not a lot of us in say 40s and 40s we have teenage or young adults living at home and due to school, uni or yhere own work patterns that they don't communicate to you we arent going to risk accommodating, and them walk in on something they probably would prefer not to see, and yes i am married, and my wife knows, we used to have a couples profile, dont be so bloody judgemental. "
40s and 50s i meant. |
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By *orem1000Couple
over a year ago
southampton |
The fact that you've been on for over a year yet no veris is a red flag for us, how could you not even meet anyone and be verified in person for so long. Given all the short comings you really need to make a big effort with your initial intro message. |
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"I been here 5 weeks now without a meet yet, is that bad??"
I believe the average wait was up to six months or so if you don't hit the clubs. But that can vary depending on red flags and general content. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mostly numbers I get hundreds of messages even though my profile is frosty as fuck. I've even put not looking for men.
A lot of single guys use fab like another Tinder. And that's fine each to their own but it ain't tinder.
There are lots of people on hetenot interested in single guys yet that's the most common profile!
No verification is a massive NO for most people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a couple we sometimes get up to a hundred a day- at once..
when I was a single girl profile I used to get a 1000 sometimes a day!
So it’s a real shame that the site doesn’t have a way of filtering these messages into groups … that way, good friends etc may not get missed so much.
Try not to take it to heart. If you’re really interested ; message them when they haven’t just posted a photo. This is when they will get the most messages.
And if they have pre requisites on their page; try to stick to them otherwise, it’s not a surprise you don’t hear from them
X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I been here 5 weeks now without a meet yet, is that bad??
I believe the average wait was up to six months or so if you don't hit the clubs. But that can vary depending on red flags and general content."
6 months for a first?? I'm patient but don't think I can wait that long, I give myself 3 months and if I don't meet anyobe by then I will delete the account |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I don't get many messages and that suits me.Usually less than 10 a week thanks to filters. But I won't reply to all I get either. I look a profile before I answer any new message and if it doesn't appeal or they cheat through my filters and depending on the message as well I may not reply. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Some great replies to my question. All information has been taken onboard. Great to see people actually took time to awnser with honest and useful suggestions x |
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"I'm another who won't be interested in a profile with no pictures. Like you, I wouldn't want my clients or colleagues to recognise me but my photos are pretty anonymous - it is possible to have pics that keep a level of privacy.
One thing I personally steer clear of is profiles which tell me I should "just ask"... "
Came here to say this - our profile explains the vast majority of what folks need to know about us, why do we need to ask? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP if I post a new pic I can get a couple of hundred messages a day.
That’s not showing off, it’s saying it as it is.
I’m 63 so imagine the volume of mail younger women receive.
When my inbox is too much to manage I hide my profile or just mass delete.
The majority of those haven’t bothered to read my profile.
I don’t understand why guys blindly send messages to women when they’re clearly not what that person is looking for.
Then they complain because they don’t receive replies  |
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