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Worst thing said during sex?
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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago
Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria |
"Your mother doesn't do it like that.
Neither does your dad. "
Not during sex but it was quite funny and ties in with Jodie's post...
My stalker was telling me that he was visiting his FB on ***** Street - I said that my Mam had just moved onto that street and he said that she was a better shag than me but not as good as my sister!
Cumbrians - what can you expect???  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Said to me on a threesome...as he was fucking sue doggy ...
Shes good isnt she - not brilliant but really good....
Sue nearly twatted him lol
I nearly pissed meself laffin |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Said to me on a threesome...as he was fucking sue doggy ...
Shes good isnt she - not brilliant but really good....
Sue nearly twatted him lol
I nearly pissed meself laffin"
PMSL!!!!! 
Had a way with words, didn't he... 
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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abot 20 years ago i said an ex girl friends name when i had just started sleeping with my new girl friend at the time..i was mortified so apoligic she was calm and fine on it all..untill i realised she had done the very same thing lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why are we here?..I mean WHY, have u never wondered what our purpose is.Think about it, leave my nipple alone a sec, but think about it, u, me and everybody...why are WE here?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Said to me on a threesome...as he was fucking sue doggy ...
Shes good isnt she - not brilliant but really good....
Sue nearly twatted him lol
I nearly pissed meself laffin"
I love this. I know if it had happened to me I'd have been in hysterics. I find thing like this really amusing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't recall saying anything wrong during sex but I did do something that he refused to talk to me for ages afterwards.
He had a huge whitehead spot right between his shoulder blades. I told him I'd squeeze it as it was sure to explode soon anyway and I promised to keep things as clean as possible by washing my hands, putting tissue around fingers, wiping with a sterile wipe etc but to no avail, he refused to pop it, wanted it to go naturally.
So at the point of his orgasm I popped the spot. It was so big you could hear it popping. He wasn't pleased and was moody for ages but I just couldn't have kept looking at it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this one still remains at the top of my list, even after 22 years:
"I can't stay over tonight - I'm getting married tomorrow morning."
OMG  "
and it was a woman!!
OMG!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was once having a threesum with my hubby and another guy in a club, they was spitroasting me with hubby in my mouth. Now I do t k ow why this actually came out loud but I felt such a bitch.
I asked the guys to swap round, as hubby entered my pussy I said, thank god time for a proper fuck
Hubby nearly died but single guy was oblivious thank god lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was once having a threesum with my hubby and another guy in a club, they was spitroasting me with hubby in my mouth. Now I do t k ow why this actually came out loud but I felt such a bitch.
I asked the guys to swap round, as hubby entered my pussy I said, thank god time for a proper fuck
Hubby nearly died but single guy was oblivious thank god lol"
I remember that nite...thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was once having a threesum with my hubby and another guy in a club, they was spitroasting me with hubby in my mouth. Now I do t k ow why this actually came out loud but I felt such a bitch.
I asked the guys to swap round, as hubby entered my pussy I said, thank god time for a proper fuck
Hubby nearly died but single guy was oblivious thank god lol
I remember that nite...thanks"
Hahaha, you wish xxxxx  |
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"Said to me on a threesome...as he was fucking sue doggy ...
Shes good isnt she - not brilliant but really good....
Sue nearly twatted him lol
I nearly pissed meself laffin
I love this. I know if it had happened to me I'd have been in hysterics. I find thing like this really amusing "
You could imagine Alan Partridge saying something along those lines, whilst he's having 'sexual intercourse'... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Her proclaiming her deepest love for me on the first meet as I'm pounding her silly, only for us to cum in a huge pool of squirting juice, and during the afterglow and cuddling, she says "I really meant it when I said I love you"
Omg, how can she love me, we've only met two hours ago! Lol and it's not just happened with just one woman either lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I could offer the good men of Fab just one piece of advice, it would be to NEVER, EVER, EVER utter the words 'you're gonna have to get off, I can't feel my legs' when a woman is riding you.
It doesn't go down well, stops sex instantly and gets you ignored for days  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure i have said anything bad unknowlingly; but if i was to i think these might take the biscut;
"can you turn a little more that way; your breath smells"
"hang on whilst i ring my wife/partner befroe we start - suck that whilst your waiting"
"can i just take this call; its the STD clinic"
"Ops i farted"
"Can you see my wedding ring (as he take fist out of pussy)"
hehehee !!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Playing at chams once and the female under me said, `hold me down and pretend your raping me` !!!
I lost my hard-on in 5 seconds flat ... im not that type of guy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did I win?"
This was after he was finished in approx 2 mins (Not my Mr a previous conquest of my teen years)
I've never known what he fully meant by that... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you want for dinner tomorrow, eat in or takeaway"..... i think my reply was something along the lines of " Neither because i won't be here" and left soon after...  |
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By *aulusMan
over a year ago
Chester |
A lady friend of mine was having her 1st ever 3sum with a bloke she was seeing and his mate and as her bloke cum he turned to the other guy and said 'you can finish her off now'. She felt really degraded by that and got shut of him the very next day! She's never got over that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whilst Mrs J was in the missionary position and I was cumming she burst out laughing and told me I looked like Grandpa Gog from the bit where he got buried .
I was not amused . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You'd think most people would be understanding considering it could be them that need the understanding given to them on a particular occasion.
Anyone can cramp up, pull a muscle, fall off the bed or whatever. Sometimes this stuff just happens. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I think this one still remains at the top of my list, even after 22 years:
"I can't stay over tonight - I'm getting married tomorrow morning."
OMG
and it was a woman!!
OMG!!!!!! "
No, it was a man with whom I thought I was in a faithful relationship. |
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"I think this one still remains at the top of my list, even after 22 years:
"I can't stay over tonight - I'm getting married tomorrow morning."
OMG
and it was a woman!!
OMG!!!!!!
No, it was a man with whom I thought I was in a faithful relationship."
O....M effing .....G.
What did you say?
Settles into comfy chair..... |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I think this one still remains at the top of my list, even after 22 years:
"I can't stay over tonight - I'm getting married tomorrow morning."
OMG
and it was a woman!!
OMG!!!!!!
No, it was a man with whom I thought I was in a faithful relationship.
O....M effing .....G.
What did you say?
Settles into comfy chair....."
I was speechless for about 20 minutes and then I asked him to tell me about the woman and how he had managed to get engaged and arrange a wedding and not let on to me at all. Two hours later I asked him to leave.
The marriage didn't last that long and he ran off with his secretary. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this one still remains at the top of my list, even after 22 years:
"I can't stay over tonight - I'm getting married tomorrow morning."
OMG
and it was a woman!!
OMG!!!!!!
No, it was a man with whom I thought I was in a faithful relationship.
O....M effing .....G.
What did you say?
Settles into comfy chair.....
I was speechless for about 20 minutes and then I asked him to tell me about the woman and how he had managed to get engaged and arrange a wedding and not let on to me at all. Two hours later I asked him to leave.
The marriage didn't last that long and he ran off with his secretary."
And the winner is....  |
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