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the art of dirty talk and been dom
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I may have a meet soon and they have asked me to be dom, the will just watch me with the lady. she has asked me to give dirty talk to.
can people advise how to be dom by giving examples, and examples of how to dirty talk too.
thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If this isn't something that comes naturally to you, then something like this may be diving into the deep end somewhat.
Not sure if I can post the link but there is a fetish site that has all the information you need, failing that google. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are many good articles on the Internet about being Dom - I would suggest that you take time to read ones written from the subs POV.
If you think that being Dom is just about shouting at the sub to do stuff, or about hurling abuse - walk away now.
Take time to learn what
a) Makes a good Dom (from internet articles)
b) Understand what your play partner wants and what are the soft and hard limits - is she looking for her boundaries to be pushed etc?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I no of one site, it is something I like the idea of. and have read up on it loads, but for me I need real world examples people can give."
Not sure if you are cut out for it then, as really as above it will come naturally to you, not something you can fake and not something you can memorise a script to. |
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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago
Midlothian |
"I no of one site, it is something I like the idea of. and have read up on it loads, but for me I need real world examples people can give.
Not sure if you are cut out for it then, as really as above it will come naturally to you, not something you can fake and not something you can memorise a script to."
totally agree (susie) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just interested, is this something you can learn or develop or is it something that you'd already know how to do? (Would love my FB to talk dirty to me, which he can do via text but he's *very* quiet in real life)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just interested, is this something you can learn or develop or is it something that you'd already know how to do? (Would love my FB to talk dirty to me, which he can do via text but he's *very* quiet in real life) "
Definitely I would say it has to be part of your personality already, hard work to be something you are not unless you are good at drama. |
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"I would say it is part of me, just need that bit of help to get started, a few examples of what other do, and some examples of dirty talk. "
To be honest, it just sounds like you want some wank material.
There are plenty of porn sites that you can watch, and take examples from. The problem with taking examples from people, and from porn is that it may not work with the person you are doing it with.
I love being choked, and having my hair pulled, doesn't mean everyone else does, and doesn't mean I'd want everyone to do it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've been here a while and have good verifications, this.is about learning new experiences and going into a big desire of mine as informed as possible. porn is terrible to learn from.
the latter part of your message was useful to me. |
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I didn't say learn from porn, but take examples from porn. And then adapt them to your personality, and what you think will work for your meet.
I often think that people who want a stranger to turn up and Dom them has just read 50 Shades too many times, and have no real idea of what it really means. Maybe if you just read that book, that will be enough.
And what has verifications got to do with wanting wank material???
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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ok I see what your saying better now, I'm certainly not looking for wank material. I am part of a fet site, for a while now, and do attend a munch now and then.
for me this site is all about the adventure and learning new things. sometimes i need just a bit of real world inspiration to kick start me |
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The only way to find out what would be best in this case is to communicate with the people you will be playing with.
There is loads you 'could' do but wether that is suitable or not is very debatable. For example Funky mentioned choking. Not everyone is going to enjoy that and for a first play experience with someone they hardly know.... That's going to terrify them if you try that.
Being Dominant is a state of mind, a way you are. You can learn new things, you can improve how you do some things but you cannot 'learn to be' you will be seen through straight away.
Ask the people what they want. You can Dominant with your voice alone. You can hold her hands above her head and fuck her hard against the wall.
Or you can lay her over the bed and take a cane to her rear.
You can tie her up and drive her nuts for an orgasm with a magic wand then make her take more than she thinks she can. Does he want to watch or does he want to take part?
There's just to many variables and you are not experienced enough to try a lot of things with new playmates imho.
Talk to them and find what they want. Talking dirty and talking like a Dominant is easy. Actually being a Dominant you are born with. |
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I would think more carefully about this 'couples' request. If he is watching and you are being Dom in a way to his lady that is not his idea of being Dom then it could go wrong. Also the lady wants you to talk dirty to her???
Being Dom and talking dirty are not the same thing.....
I would have a conversation with the couple and ask them to give you a scenario of what their idea of Dom is, you may find that all they want is for you to talk dirty in a dominating way rather than get out the paddles and straps !!!
Good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's no fucking way I'd ever ask to be Dommed by a complete stranger with NO experience 
If you go to munches, surely they would be the place to ask advice and watch people interact (especially a play munch)
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"There are many good articles on the Internet about being Dom - I would suggest that you take time to read ones written from the subs POV.
If you think that being Dom is just about shouting at the sub to do stuff, or about hurling abuse - walk away now.
Take time to learn what
a) Makes a good Dom (from internet articles)
b) Understand what your play partner wants and what are the soft and hard limits - is she looking for her boundaries to be pushed etc?
"
Very well put.... |
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