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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We’ve discussed this in relation to a friend of ours and although we enjoy having guys join us for fun we both feel uncomfortable with the “dating / romance” side of polyamory.
Guess we’re not emotionally woke enough. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We’ve discussed this in relation to a friend of ours and although we enjoy having guys join us for fun we both feel uncomfortable with the “dating / romance” side of polyamory.
Guess we’re not emotionally woke enough. "
I think you’re misusing the term woke. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We’ve discussed this in relation to a friend of ours and although we enjoy having guys join us for fun we both feel uncomfortable with the “dating / romance” side of polyamory.
Guess we’re not emotionally woke enough.
I think you’re misusing the term woke. "
Sorry I didn’t realise this was going to be such a defensive thread. |
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"We’ve discussed this in relation to a friend of ours and although we enjoy having guys join us for fun we both feel uncomfortable with the “dating / romance” side of polyamory.
Guess we’re not emotionally woke enough.
I think you’re misusing the term woke.
Sorry I didn’t realise this was going to be such a defensive thread. "
I think you're misusing the word 'defensive'
x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We’ve discussed this in relation to a friend of ours and although we enjoy having guys join us for fun we both feel uncomfortable with the “dating / romance” side of polyamory.
Guess we’re not emotionally woke enough.
I think you’re misusing the term woke.
Sorry I didn’t realise this was going to be such a defensive thread.
I think you're misusing the word 'defensive'
x
How so?
"
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So typically how many relationships is it practical to keep running in parallel .. and how long might they last. From what i know they tend to be quite transient so im curious about what the optimum level of closeness is before things start to get tricky and unrewarding |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I adore being polyam. Well it's not so much "being" as being true to who I am, without following societal conventions and feeling ashamed of how I feel. It's not always smooth sailing (can present its own problems) but no relationship is. I find it incredibly fulfilling and I don't know. I feel content. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The idea of it is fantastic but I don't think that I have the emotional capacity for it. I can just about keep myself functioning and care for my wife at the same time, but add any more people to the mix and I'd be too stressed about keeping all of my plates spinning, and potentially neglecting someone.
More power to those who can  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like the idea of it but I don’t really have the time for one relationship let alone many.
The way i see it is that we have many friends who usually fulfil certain roles in our lives- why can’t it be the same for partners/lovers? X
Maybe the term ethically non monogamous would suit my feelings better.
It’s an interesting topic and I’ll be keeping an eye on this thread to learn more  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My wife is poly and has a loving relationship with a boyfriend, she has stopped swinging now leaving me to carry on by myself and although I'm enjoying going to a club and playing with others I do sometimes wonder if I might also be poly, I'm finding myself wanting to get to know people a lot more then just having NSA sex with them and wonder if I am starting to catch feelings for some of them while at the same time the love I have for my wife is very much still there,
It can be very confusing at times and I think I would be scared to actually pursue any sort of a relationship more then just a FWB type of scenario as I don't see myself being able to manage my time very well between two people. |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
i think on this site there should be a section for poly people just as there should be for dating ... there are alot on here for those reasons also so that others can see whos looking for poly or dates ..
poly not for me ill carry on with swinging and happy marriage and wish those looking good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i think on this site there should be a section for poly people just as there should be for dating ... there are alot on here for those reasons also so that others can see whos looking for poly or dates ..
poly not for me ill carry on with swinging and happy marriage and wish those looking good luck "
Good point! We thought the same must be a special section here on fabs like dating or something especially as we know so many cuckold hotwife poly couples here xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My wife is poly and has a loving relationship with a boyfriend, she has stopped swinging now leaving me to carry on by myself and although I'm enjoying going to a club and playing with others I do sometimes wonder if I might also be poly, I'm finding myself wanting to get to know people a lot more then just having NSA sex with them and wonder if I am starting to catch feelings for some of them while at the same time the love I have for my wife is very much still there,
It can be very confusing at times and I think I would be scared to actually pursue any sort of a relationship more then just a FWB type of scenario as I don't see myself being able to manage my time very well between two people. "
Mrs always like to date and go to clubs weekend away with her lovers just can't find that special one for long term x |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
I'm poly...
I'm in a new relationship so the NRE (New Relationship Energy) is strong at the moment. It isn't a relationship I was expecting to be in but so far it's going really well, I'm exceptionally loved up and the husband and the boy already were freinds so it's made things a lot easier all round as their transition into metamours isn't that hard... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My wife is poly and has a loving relationship with a boyfriend, she has stopped swinging now leaving me to carry on by myself and although I'm enjoying going to a club and playing with others I do sometimes wonder if I might also be poly, I'm finding myself wanting to get to know people a lot more then just having NSA sex with them and wonder if I am starting to catch feelings for some of them while at the same time the love I have for my wife is very much still there,
It can be very confusing at times and I think I would be scared to actually pursue any sort of a relationship more then just a FWB type of scenario as I don't see myself being able to manage my time very well between two people.
Mrs always like to date and go to clubs weekend away with her lovers just can't find that special one for long term x"
It's relatively new for us and she does go on dates and weekends away with him all the time, I'm not overly keen on him if I'm being honest but that's just because we are totally different people, just so long as Mrs is happy and he doesn't do anything to hurt her, I'm happy doing my thing and won't do anything to get in the way of her and his relationship |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
"i think on this site there should be a section for poly people just as there should be for dating ... there are alot on here for those reasons also so that others can see whos looking for poly or dates ..
poly not for me ill carry on with swinging and happy marriage and wish those looking good luck
Good point! We thought the same must be a special section here on fabs like dating or something especially as we know so many cuckold hotwife poly couples here xxx"
wow and theres me thinking i dont know one not even on the cuckold only sites n forums and i know lots of cuckold and swinging couples from the last 30 years ? i guess it must be a newest thing that getting out there now i totally get it just not for me ill happily shag with others but anything more than friendship would have me running a mile  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I can't keep up, is poly like swinging?"
Kinda, if you want two or more partners that as well as sex you enjoy a relationship with (including all the ups,downs and middling bits)
E |
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I believe I am potentially poly. I have been married most of my life (three times) but at the same time have developed intensely emotional relationships with several other women which have never come to anything, although acknowledged and to some extent reciprocated, because of conventional worries about the situation. I've even been on holiday with a couple of them (purely non-sexual).
It would not be a problem with my wife now as she expects me to have other relationships and is content with that, but it seems very difficult to convince other people that is so. |
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I love polyam life, I discovered it in my early 30s when I realised that it best described the way I felt and thought about love and relationships, I currently have one partner who I have a long distance relationship with and am looking for a partner more local to me.
It can be hard work at times but also so fulfilling, my longest relation ship was 8 years with my ex nesting partner during which time we both had other partners and at one point dated another poly couple for about 2 years which was such a happy time but sadly came to an end as good things sometimes do. I would still do it again in a heartbeat though as it makes my heart smile. |
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"I believe I am potentially poly. I have been married most of my life (three times) but at the same time have developed intensely emotional relationships with several other women which have never come to anything, although acknowledged and to some extent reciprocated, because of conventional worries about the situation. I've even been on holiday with a couple of them (purely non-sexual).
It would not be a problem with my wife now as she expects me to have other relationships and is content with that, but it seems very difficult to convince other people that is so."
It can be very hard for some people to understand the concept of poly because it goes against everything society has always said is "the right way to love", also you have to understand that some people just arent "wired" for poly (excuse the term) which is fine, I understand where you are coming from totally though as my current partner is fully aware of everything and we have an open poly relationship which works perfectly for us due to distance but I still find it hard to find suitable partners that understand poly or that are happy with a poly relationship. |
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By *igsaw93Woman
over a year ago
Glasgow |
" I can't keep up, is poly like swinging?"
It’s another form of ENM, with different relationship dynamics & boundaries going beyond the purely sexual / friendship levels that are generally associated with swinging.
Some people are ‘solo poly’ so have different relationships but don’t have a primary partner that they are doing the escalator with (agreed commitment, levels of exclusivity, living together, kids / pets etc), whereas others have a primary or anchor relationship and then other partner(s).
There are also relationship anarchists who don’t identify with swinging or poly. They individually select the elements of each relationship dynamic that works with each partner.
This is a very basic outline from my personal understanding / experience, but hopefully it helps as a start point. There are lots of good books and podcasts around if you’re interested. Just depends how you personally feel and your partners.
Jigs xx |
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