FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Timewasters
Timewasters
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is mainly why me and My Girl just prefer to go to clubs. Totally eliminates time wasters and wasted time, energy, disappointment and cost."
We’ve had a few socials with couples and been lucky so far 
Going to our first club tonight  |
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting? "
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting."
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks! |
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks! "
Go for it…..you grab that opportunity and make it count Jag-a |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks!
Go for it…..you grab that opportunity and make it count Jag-a"
Don't call me that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting."
Theres no rule says you have to meet because you are on here... people use the site differently doesnt make people timewasters... |
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I don’t really care. I can quite happily have my time wasted while I’m working from home.
We have encountered what some would consider a timewaster very recently. I’m unscathed but slightly disappointed - he’s fit! |
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks!
Go for it…..you grab that opportunity and make it count Jag-a
Don't call me that. "
Sorry….Jag was fun and sarcastic with a touch of crazy.
Ugly makes me feel blue - and I’m actually not sorry Jag-a |
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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
I do distinctly remember a few years ago in this website, the forums were reeking of the opinion that the definition of a time waster is a single man who arranges to meet and then he doesn’t meet. Simultaneously it was couple’s and a single woman’s prerogative to arrange a meet and then not meet…As long as we accept that it’s an individual’s prerogative to change their mind, regardless of their sex/gender then there isn’t really such a thing as a time waster on a swingers’ website, is there? |
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"This is mainly why me and My Girl just prefer to go to clubs. Totally eliminates time wasters and wasted time, energy, disappointment and cost.
We’ve had a few socials with couples and been lucky so far
Going to our first club tonight "
Hope you have a great time. We just love you don't need to make any plans with anyone. You just go at your leisure and go find mischief, hopefully more than once in one night. Most of our freinds and acquaintances on the scene we've met in clubs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks!
Go for it…..you grab that opportunity and make it count Jag-a
Don't call me that.
Sorry….Jag was fun and sarcastic with a touch of crazy.
Ugly makes me feel blue - and I’m actually not sorry Jag-a"
I think you have me confused with someone else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Theres no rule says you have to meet because you are on here... people use the site differently doesnt make people timewasters... "
It makes the men feel better though.. |
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"What do you call a time waster?.
Some that wasted time….perhaps!?!
Such as messaging and then not meeting?
Possibly…..messaging then ghosting.
Maybe….being on a site with absolutely no intention of meeting.
Awesome, just off to add time waster to my profile. Thanks!
Go for it…..you grab that opportunity and make it count Jag-a
Don't call me that.
Sorry….Jag was fun and sarcastic with a touch of crazy.
Ugly makes me feel blue - and I’m actually not sorry Jag-a
I think you have me confused with someone else. "
Nope!
There can’t be two rather attractive women who go all out to convince the world otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Hope you have a great time. We just love you don't need to make any plans with anyone. You just go at your leisure and go find mischief, hopefully more than once in one night. Most of our freinds and acquaintances on the scene we've met in clubs."
Not sure what to expect, so will just play it by ear and see where the night takes us. |
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"I do distinctly remember a few years ago in this website, the forums were reeking of the opinion that the definition of a time waster is a single man who arranges to meet and then he doesn’t meet. Simultaneously it was couple’s and a single woman’s prerogative to arrange a meet and then not meet…As long as we accept that it’s an individual’s prerogative to change their mind, regardless of their sex/gender then there isn’t really such a thing as a time waster on a swingers’ website, is there?"
Changing your mind is fine. But communicating that would be helpful, rather than let others drive an hour to then be ghosted. A change of mind is understandable (if feustrating), but not communicating that is real time-wasting. |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
a timewater on here is NOT someone who wont talk to you or wont answer your messages or a person who does not meet ? as said no one owes anyone anything on this site or any other at a guess id say over half on here dont meet via the site that dont make them timewasters they meet other ways and use the site to keep in touch ...see these timewaster post all the time mainly guys who feel they are entitled to a reply but your not
people will chat to who they want meet who they want they are not going to talk to people they have zero interest in or they do talk and lose interest thats not timewasting thats life also look in the fab rules no reply is not interested |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
"
Hope you have a great time. We just love you don't need to make any plans with anyone. You just go at your leisure and go find mischief, hopefully more than once in one night. Most of our freinds and acquaintances on the scene we've met in clubs.
Not sure what to expect, so will just play it by ear and see where the night takes us. "
you'll love it .. |
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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I do distinctly remember a few years ago in this website, the forums were reeking of the opinion that the definition of a time waster is a single man who arranges to meet and then he doesn’t meet. Simultaneously it was couple’s and a single woman’s prerogative to arrange a meet and then not meet…As long as we accept that it’s an individual’s prerogative to change their mind, regardless of their sex/gender then there isn’t really such a thing as a time waster on a swingers’ website, is there?
Changing your mind is fine. But communicating that would be helpful, rather than let others drive an hour to then be ghosted. A change of mind is understandable (if feustrating), but not communicating that is real time-wasting. "
See, I’m tempted to play devil’s advocate and say…drive to where? A specific address that has turned out to be fake? Or did they suggest driving to a pub/café for a meeting and then they didn’t show up? If it’s the former, ok….if it’s the latter…they have every right to do that….that's pretty much what I would get told years ago… |
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"So what do people think about timewasters on here. At this moment in time I seem to finding them all. Anyone else have this problem?"
As others have said, there's a lot of time wasters on here including couples, some who use the forums. We also go to clubs, we couldn't do Fab without clubs, it would be too hard work. |
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"
Hope you have a great time. We just love you don't need to make any plans with anyone. You just go at your leisure and go find mischief, hopefully more than once in one night. Most of our freinds and acquaintances on the scene we've met in clubs.
Not sure what to expect, so will just play it by ear and see where the night takes us. "
That's part of the fun not knowing what to expect and nerves as you psych yourselves up to go through that door the first time. That's the best attitude, go with no expectations and take it as you find it. Just remember every club and night is different. You'll be fine. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Define a time waster OP.
That’s another word that’s thrown around too much…
Someone not replying isn’t a time waster. "
Don't they! That and fake.
Someone that doesn't reply, or doesn't wanna meet you after exchanging messages isn't either.
Just accept the fact they don't like you!!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Define a time waster OP.
That’s another word that’s thrown around too much…
Someone not replying isn’t a time waster.
Don't they! That and fake.
Someone that doesn't reply, or doesn't wanna meet you after exchanging messages isn't either.
Just accept the fact they don't like you!!!
"
 this  |
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"I do distinctly remember a few years ago in this website, the forums were reeking of the opinion that the definition of a time waster is a single man who arranges to meet and then he doesn’t meet. Simultaneously it was couple’s and a single woman’s prerogative to arrange a meet and then not meet…As long as we accept that it’s an individual’s prerogative to change their mind, regardless of their sex/gender then there isn’t really such a thing as a time waster on a swingers’ website, is there?
Changing your mind is fine. But communicating that would be helpful, rather than let others drive an hour to then be ghosted. A change of mind is understandable (if feustrating), but not communicating that is real time-wasting.
See, I’m tempted to play devil’s advocate and say…drive to where? A specific address that has turned out to be fake? Or did they suggest driving to a pub/café for a meeting and then they didn’t show up? If it’s the former, ok….if it’s the latter…they have every right to do that….that's pretty much what I would get told years ago…"
We all agree people have the right to withdraw from a meet. Where the timewaster accusation is deserved is when it leads to another party having their time wasted.
Quite simply, for example, if a lady chats to a guy for 2 weeks on here. Switches to Kik and chats some more, then agrees to meet at a time and place, it is reasonable for the guy to expect her to turn up.
If she then decides on the morning of the meet she does not want to meet, then is the moment the Timewaster or not judgement cuts in.
If she messages him and says "Sorry I changed my mind" she is exercising her free will and right to withdraw and is not a timewaster.
If she ghosts him or gaslights him and leaves him to go to the meeting spot alone then she has wasted his time and is a Timewaster; whatever her reason for withdrawing.
Chatting and not meeting is not timewasting in my book. Causing others abortive travel and wasted time at the meeting place because they have not been told is timewasting. |
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"As long as we accept that it’s an individual’s prerogative to change their mind, regardless of their sex/gender then there isn’t really such a thing as a time waster on a swingers’ website, is there?"
People who arrange to meet but don't turn up aren't time wasters! People who swap messages and say how much they want to meet but change their mind also aren't time wasters! (No time was involved!)
In the case of couples, we're of the opinion that maybe the Men do most of the messaging and arrange to meet. He shows his partner the profile and she's not interested, or he has a w#nk and the feeling passes |
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If someone pulls out of a meet the first time then I can understand that. Life happens. I am warier about a second meet but if it does get put back in the diary and they no show again then that is just a block and move on. Life is too short.
I also tend to cut conversations that are not leading anywhere back pretty quickly as well now. I get people like to “chat” but “chatters” also, in my experience, tend not to meet. Obviously your experience might vary but life is, again, too short. |
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"People who arrange to meet but don't turn up aren't time wasters! "
In our view they are time wasters , if they don’t communicate that change of mind. If they do, then fair enough.
"People who swap messages and say how much they want to meet but change their mind also aren't time wasters! (No time was involved!)"
Agree.
" In the case of couples, we're of the opinion that maybe the Men do most of the messaging and arrange to meet. He shows his partner the profile and she's not interested, or he has a w#nk and the feeling passes "
Yeah, quite likely. But the courteous thing to say would be, something like… I’d love to meet, the diary looks clear, but will need to double check with partner.
I don’t see why all manners have to go out of the window just because it is a swingers’ site. We all agree the "no" is fine (I hope) at any stage in proceedings, but at least actually say it, especially if a date, time and venue have been set, |
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Time wasters is a touchy subject, I’m happy to ping pong messages, we all have loved and a lot of the time they can be 100 miles away.
Our weekends don’t match up and they may have young children, we do and sometimes it’s just impossible.
That all said if we go get a date that matches, TURN UP, or message with time for us to arrange something else. No shows to us are Time Wasters. |
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By *omRachCouple
over a year ago
Wirral |
"what is a timewaster ? whats your definition of one ? bearing in mind your on a site where nobody owes you anything ..so at least let us know what your definition of one is ? "
Someone who doesn't turn up at an agreed upon venue at an agreed upon time who offers nothing in the way of communication to indicate to you that they cannot make it. |
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"It is not just singles who timewaste. We had just as much cpls wasre our time also. "
When I was married we started meeting single men due to a run of no shows with cpls .... so it not just singles who sate others time..... |
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"So what do people think about timewasters on here. At this moment in time I seem to finding them all. Anyone else have this problem?"
Thats part of fab...  plenty of them floating around,unfortunately... |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Someone can only waste your time of you allow them to.
Personally the minute I think someone is only looking for wank material or is pushing for something I don't want I stop chatting. Sometimes I will say it first sometimes I won't bother it all depends on the person and their attitude.
The fact I'm not doing any new meets for the foreseeable future is at the top of my profile so if someone contacts me and I reply it is the first thing I tell them as well .If they continue to want to chat then get pissed off because I won't meet that's on them.
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By *rlandoMan
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
everyone with a profile is a potential timewaster ...
couple and single female profiles that have been here for three weeks , with no verification or photo.
there is always someone going to send a message then wonder why they bothered ? |
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