FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > married yet dont know each other
married yet dont know each other
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By *oxy j OP Woman
over a year ago
somerset |
im amazed at how many are married yet dont know their own partners i thought being married was knowing your partner inside out ?? yet the amount of time you see single profiles on here asking how to get wife to do this or that or what is my partner thinking ? ... i think to myself what do these people do when living together? why would you marry someone who in your mind is a prude or dislikes anything you do ?? just seeing it more and more
i thought marriage was soulmate stuff knowing what makes each other tick allowing the other half to do stuff you dont like (hobbies/sports ) i know my hubs inside out as he knows me ... im not talking those early in there journey either this is people who been married 10 - 20 - 30 years ... i find it mind boggling |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well I’m not married so I can’t speak for married people but I do know things can change and not everything is set in stone.
What I’m saying is you might marry your partner never even thinking about swinging until years later. One of you watches a documentary or something and it sparks a thought… It can’t be the easiest subject to talk about because it can go one way to the other…
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Well I’m not married so I can’t speak for married people but I do know things can change and not everything is set in stone.
What I’m saying is you might marry your partner never even thinking about swinging until years later. One of you watches a documentary or something and it sparks a thought… It can’t be the easiest subject to talk about because it can go one way to the other…
"
Yep.
The easiest way to avoid that awkward conversation about introducing swinging into your married life is this.
Marry a Swinger.  
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t understand how people can wear masks .
Tho I understand a frustrated woman who is trapped in a marriage Being treated like shit .
That I don’t consider cheating . That is a rescue mission . And I would give her what she deserves . With love and respect .
I never cheated and I never will . I rather lose then fake to keep .
I don’t get it . |
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By *oxy j OP Woman
over a year ago
somerset |
"Well I’m not married so I can’t speak for married people but I do know things can change and not everything is set in stone.
What I’m saying is you might marry your partner never even thinking about swinging until years later. One of you watches a documentary or something and it sparks a thought… It can’t be the easiest subject to talk about because it can go one way to the other…
"
yep can see what your saying but your married to the person who closest to you you do everything together surely it just a case of bringing the subject up to gauge interest ? its not do or die its just chat ..
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As I say on my profile,I think this world may be far more honest than the, shall I say vanilla world.
Lots of people I know have had affairs as they want that excitement and that often leads to mistrust with their new partners and that cycle continues.
Some people try to get to know their partners on a deeper level but broaching the subject of sex with others, even in fantasy play, can get a very negative response. Strange though that those disgusted partners can then actually go and enjoy the company of someone else without their current partner knowing about it and having being outraged at their thoughts on the subject...funny old world!  |
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I don't think they marry knowing that the person will dislike things they do, relationships and the people within them change. Marriage means different things to people too.
I think a lot of people are afraid of rocking the boat and are looking for ways to get their partner involved without having to actually ask them. Some sort of magic combination of words that will make them come up with the idea themselves.
I think too that some people would like their partner to be extremely enthusiastic about swinging rather than express doubts, insecurities and fears. In short they're not prepared to put the emotional groundwork in.
The number of times I've seen "I know she'd love it" written by someone who hasn't spoken to them about it and is asking other people what she's thinking is surprising to me.
Some men claim that women are a mystery and they don't understand them. That, it seems to me is because they simply don't engage with the women in their life on anything but a superficial level.
*I know women are also guilty of all the above* |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
Your not encouraged or taught about having such open discussions with your partner. You go through life oblivious to what’s available and the options that are out there. Then comes along the internet and everyone can find out about alternative lifestyles.
It’s possible an age thing or cultural. How many of us sit down with partners and discuss swinging, kinks, fetishes, clubs, etc?
It’s easy to criticise from this side but if you’ve only experienced vanilla sex with the same partner then it’s not easy to have these conversations. |
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By *batMan
over a year ago
Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales) |
I got married (and divorced) when I was too young for either thing.
We had a great vanilla sex life but neither of us was mature enough to do the things we really wanted to do. I know I wanted to do them, and I'm pretty sure she wanted to do them because of what I know about her some years later.
We can never go back and try again, but boy, I wouldn't mind meeting her for the first time next week. I reckon sparks would fly!
Gbat |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember having that conversation with my, now ex wife.
It’s very difficult to broach the subject when you have been together for such a long time. The kids grown up and mid life tramadol creeps up without you realising. Being a secret lemonade drinker I was so difficult to confess to. R Whites! |
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"im amazed at how many are married yet dont know their own partners i thought being married was knowing your partner inside out ?? yet the amount of time you see single profiles on here asking how to get wife to do this or that or what is my partner thinking ? ... i think to myself what do these people do when living together? why would you marry someone who in your mind is a prude or dislikes anything you do ?? just seeing it more and more
i thought marriage was soulmate stuff knowing what makes each other tick allowing the other half to do stuff you dont like (hobbies/sports ) i know my hubs inside out as he knows me ... im not talking those early in there journey either this is people who been married 10 - 20 - 30 years ... i find it mind boggling "
you carry on how you mean to go on, if you started off as a prude then your probably stuck with your lot, if you started her out as a lady on your arm and a freak in bed then chances are things will continue as normal, there are a lot of 70 somthings on here and you can bet your balls on it that thev lived a colourful sex life from the off. |
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"i know my hubs inside out as he knows me ..."
Most people think that. Most are wrong.
In fact, the people on here asking the kind of questions you ask are probably married to people who think they know their spouse inside-out.
Alice x |
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By *oxy j OP Woman
over a year ago
somerset |
"i know my hubs inside out as he knows me ...
Most people think that. Most are wrong.
In fact, the people on here asking the kind of questions you ask are probably married to people who think they know their spouse inside-out.
Alice x"
nice try but your wrong i ask the question because of what gets wrote on these forum ? ive not ask the question because i doubt us lol nice try tho  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"nice try but your wrong i ask the question because of what gets wrote on these forum ? ive not ask the question because i doubt us lol nice try tho
Okie dokie.  "
Cool beans  but what is your actual question the OP? |
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