FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Should I have made more effort?
Should I have made more effort?
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I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? |
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Depends how the profile read.
I get these sometimes, look at the blank zero effort no picture profile and just delete. If they take the time to say what they are after / make an effort with the profile I will always reply, even if just a hi.
End of the day, you make as much effort as you feel the person deserves and in this case, sounds like you don’t think they deserved much   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There really isn’t a right or wrong answer…
Ask yourself did you really want to meet her?
Was it even a woman…
If “you” expect messages with effort then “she” wasn’t for you anyway with her one word message. |
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It's unknown. I would reply or not, based on my interest and their effort level. You can't predict that well how things will proceed.
Except it's important to remember that most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. Not remembering that leads to unrealistic expectations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
Why bother? As you say, double standard in terms of the 'effort' in the initial message. |
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
I'm guessing that by the time you replied that the sender (50 year old single blokes, still lives with his mum) had finished his (oops 'her') wank. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
I wouldn’t of replied back to a ‘Hi’  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
We don’t respond to “hi” or clear copy paste jobs. You shouldn’t either. Not everyone is worth your time |
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
I’d be dubious when any meet would occur. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve experienced a distinct lack of effort in terms of messages from quite a few women who said they were interested in me. It’s not a criticism, more an observation. I suppose if I received hundreds of messages from horny women everyday my replies would be short too! :D |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
Nope she messaged you first, she should have put more effort in I think |
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I know it's exciting as a man to get a message out of the blue, but the one word messages are never worth following up on in my experience. It's totally indicative of the effort they will put in overall |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't of even answered that. What a shite effort (it's not even effort is it)
You get out of it what you put into it  "
I agree with this. I will put as much effort into a conversation as the other person(s)
Men get a lot of stick for sending shit messages on here but that can be said for women and couples too.
Hopefully your next message has more letters in it than the message heading |
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By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
I used to make the effort but you can only have a conversation if the return message has a string of words that are not text speak, otherwise now just ignore or return the favour with one or two word replies. Us chaps are reputed to be bad for it but the inability to have a meaningful conversation is across the genders. |
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
You done alright mate, I give back same energy I get  . Your time and effort is valuable no point wasting it on someone who doesn’t value it |
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By *DW1983Man
over a year ago
Aberdeen, Leeds, Sheffield |
If I'd replied at all, I'd have done the same. If someone wants to open a conversation, there are easy enough ways to do it, even the relatively dull 'how are you?' or 'I like your profile pic'. At least they leave you with somewhere to go with the conversation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was this person based in Ripon?
I had a similar message and wrote a little more in response and then nothing
I also got a longer more detailed message from someone randomly that seamed very genuine. I took time to respond in detail. They didn’t read my response for about 2 weeks and then just deleted it |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"I got a random message from a lady this morning entitled “meet”.
The message contained Hi, and nothing else.
I replied with Hi.My reply was then deleted.
Should I have made more effort, or was it justified just match the effort made by the sender?
I always read on here that single guys make zero effort when sending messages, but wasn’t that the same by a single lady? "
Perfectly acceptable, we get it all the time from single ladies and they get the same amount of effort back as they put in. Quite often they message and then rely on you making all the running. After two or three messages we will often respond with something along the lines of
"if this is an indication of the amount of effort you are prepared to put in then we don't think you are what we are looking for, good luck in your search"
and then delete the conversation. |
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"Was this person based in Ripon?
I had a similar message and wrote a little more in response and then nothing
I also got a longer more detailed message from someone randomly that seamed very genuine. I took time to respond in detail. They didn’t read my response for about 2 weeks and then just deleted it "
Blackpool.
She had a couple of verifications, so I remain unconvinced she was a he, it was just all a bit odd.
Agree with the above that said she probably wanted me to make all the effort with a decent message in return.
Had a feeling though after just “Hi” that I was probably wasting my time. |
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By *Xtriple7Couple
over a year ago
N Peterborough. |
"Perfectly acceptable, we get it all the time from single ladies and they get the same amount of effort back as they put in. Quite often they message and then rely on you making all the running. After two or three messages we will often respond with something along the lines of
"if this is an indication of the amount of effort you are prepared to put in then we don't think you are what we are looking for, good luck in your search"
and then delete the conversation."
Agreed, we've had a few guys recently where it's clear we're expected to find and book a hotel and do all the running around. One sentence bare minimum replies, we'd expect a bit of enthusiasm in return. |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
A very unscientific estimate, we reckon about 75% of the messages we get from guys are one word, haven't read the profile, no effort rubbish.
But more like 95% of the messages we get from single women and couples are just as bad. We figure they're either fakes or think they have a free pass because they have a vagina.
(Bry) |
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