FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > why can't guys accept a polite No in reply to their emails
why can't guys accept a polite No in reply to their emails
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x |
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Some people find it difficult to take rejection well, or maybe they are after feed back to see what they can do to improve their approach.
Me I just reply say thanks for getting back to me and have fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its prob because when they do get a reply (and it won't be very often) its usually a no and lots of rejections probably does get them down. Not the girls fault its just how this place is  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
I've heard a lot of this on the forums recently.
Why not just reply if you choose and then block?
A simple solution to the unwanted further contact. Some people can't cope in a sensible manner with rejection - but if you're not in the least interested - use the tools available.
In an ideal world this wouldn't be necessary but the world will never be ideal! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always reply, ok so I ditched one this morning as my reply would have been 1000% more words than his email.
Sop I reply 99%
If its a clear thanks but no, I send the 'no thanks' and block and delete the email to clear it out.
Back then when; I spent hours giving feedback on my reasons but 9/10 come back with 'youre too fat or *add insult here*' so no I dont justify my choices anymore, I figure its not rude because I bothered to reply in the first instance.
I've learnt so many ways top say no thanks, so when an email comes in and its not a no thanks, I never know what Im suppsed to put  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
Say no, then block. If you've told them you're not interested, what is the point in keeping them 'live'..?
 |
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The National Fab Union of Genuine Men would also like to point out that the men who do this are unlikely to have ever bothered reading the forums, so you're preaching to the converted to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
 |
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
Your first line is a very sweeping statement.
It seems you've had some bad luck.
Come and say hi, I'll respond, you can reject me.
I might say thanks for replying and leave it at that.
Try it, you might like it. |
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Personally even when I get a no thanks reply I always send a thanks for replying and best wishes message. I reckon I probably get a reply to around 10% of messages in the first instance which means Im even ecstatic just to get the no thanks reply!!  |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"I get far more 'Thanks for taking the time to reply' responses than I do stroppy ones.
Stroppy ones are easy enough to deal with. I ignore them."
Same here....can count on one hand the amount of stroppy one we have had to a no thanks message.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
Your first line is a very sweeping statement.
It seems you've had some bad luck.
Come and say hi, I'll respond, you can reject me.
I might say thanks for replying and leave it at that.
Try it, you might like it."
Likewise, i like getting a response when i get one.
If its a no, then "c'est la vie". A note back for saying thanks for letting me know and take care is the usual answer.
Does it need anymore?
of course I may go a cry then......
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure why asking why would make any difference if you get a "no thanks". My personal bugbear is when someone asks for messages to have some time spent compiling them, and then don't even bother to reply when you do. Last time I checked I didn't have two heads, and I only hit the occasional branch falling out of the ugly tree. Maybe it's because I'm married and being a very naughty boy!! |
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I like it that these guys ask why.
I'm sure it just maake a little more elbow room for those of us who aren't clowns.
Stop posting these whinges about them, (or they may get the message then we're all f#ck'd) ignore them and go find the decent guys.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not sure why asking why would make any difference if you get a "no thanks". My personal bugbear is when someone asks for messages to have some time spent compiling them, and then don't even bother to reply when you do. Last time I checked I didn't have two heads, and I only hit the occasional branch falling out of the ugly tree. Maybe it's because I'm married and being a very naughty boy!!
It's the way your knuckles drag on the ground. Pick 'em up and you might have a better chance "
If only you would have told me that months ago! I'll have to learn to walk like a real homo sapiens now. Could take a while! Have to be careful being in Manchester as I might end up walking like Liam Gallagher! |
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By *H91Man
over a year ago
E |
To be honest I'd rather get a reply with a polite no thanks, than nothing at all. At most I'd send back a thanks anyway type message.
Too many single guys on this site have given us a bad name. And it ruins the site for those of us who aren't pushy, and can accept rejection. |
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"I like it that these guys ask why.
I'm sure it just maake a little more elbow room for those of us who aren't clowns.
Stop posting these whinges about them, (or they may get the message then we're all f#ck'd) ignore them and go find the decent guys.
"
^^^ THIS ^^^
...and in case you missed it...
^^^^^^^^ T H I S ^^^^^^^^^^ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When someone does take the time and trouble to say no thank I always reply to them thanking them for letting me know.
I can't see the point in being rude if they have decided it's a no then it's a no. No amount of abuse will change anything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
havent you got anything better to do than slag off single guys if you dont like the reply block them and move on its not rocket science why come on the forum and moan about it |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"The advice from the National Fab Union of Genuine Men is to ignore and block then forget about it.
This has been a NFUGM service announcement. Have a nice day "
that reminds me... when are my subs due?????
in response to the thread... you are not going to be able to please everyone, so just do things the way that is right for you....
as long as you haven't been abusive... any reaction to the rejection is their problem.. not your.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When someone does take the time and trouble to say no thank I always reply to them thanking them for letting me know.
I can't see the point in being rude if they have decided it's a no then it's a no. No amount of abuse will change anything."
here is asingle male like me is not ur usual plonker and should be given a second look cos he is respect full |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
havent you got anything better to do than slag off single guys if you dont like the reply block them and move on its not rocket science why come on the forum and moan about it"
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I often belive that the nature of sites like this interferes with the minds of some men. They forget that the people behind the profiles are just that, people, with preferences and choices just like the rest of us. Some must think that the site gives them a god given right to get a meet......
fortunately, some of us men act like adults and will either say 'Thanks for taking the time to get back to me' or similar and move on, because we know the volumes of messages that women and couples receive.
For the ones who do get stroppy or ask why..... block is the easy answer and should be used, there are plenty of other decent guys on here who will make the place pleasurable and non-confrontational. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When someone does take the time and trouble to say no thank I always reply to them thanking them for letting me know.
I can't see the point in being rude if they have decided it's a no then it's a no. No amount of abuse will change anything.here is asingle male like me is not ur usual plonker and should be given a second look cos he is respect full"
Thank you very much for your kind words |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
havent you got anything better to do than slag off single guys if you dont like the reply block them and move on its not rocket science why come on the forum and moan about it"
we are genuine non genuine guys spoil it for us genuine peeps so intitled to moan about plonkers who are desperate and should be instantlly deleted from site for abuse |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When someone does take the time and trouble to say no thank I always reply to them thanking them for letting me know.
I can't see the point in being rude if they have decided it's a no then it's a no. No amount of abuse will change anything.here is asingle male like me is not ur usual plonker and should be given a second look cos he is respect full
Thank you very much for your kind words"
no porob mate needs more of us to get rid of the plonkers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because they think probably the following :
They are Gods gift
People are desperate to meet them
And to add to this they are probably disfunctional , unable to hold a conversation , show any type of respect , so can you imagine what a meet would be like ? .
Luckily we have met some great single guys off here , after getting past those mentioned above ! Sara & cris
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"The advice from the National Fab Union of Genuine Men is to ignore and block then forget about it.
This has been a NFUGM service announcement. Have a nice day
that reminds me... when are my subs due?????
in response to the thread... you are not going to be able to please everyone, so just do things the way that is right for you....
as long as you haven't been abusive... any reaction to the rejection is their problem.. not your...."
Sorry Fabio, I got kicked out the Union for my forum rant about... er, whatever it was about... |
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
From now if I was you after sending a polite no thanks if somebody sends just 1 message back asking why not I would block. You have been polite to send a message back saying no thanks you do not have to explain why you are saying no thanks.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The National Fab Union of Genuine Men would also like to point out that the men who do this are unlikely to have ever bothered reading the forums, so you're preaching to the converted to be honest. "
Wrong, I got nasty messages after saying no thanks, he was a guy in the forums |
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You should call their bluff sometimes and reply back to them with your reasons why you don't want to meet them. Let's say somebody emails you and you think sorry but no you looked like beached whale who drinks Whiskey all day. Would that man really want you to reply with that when he asks why not? What I am saying is I don't get why you would want to know why somebody does not want to meet you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some people cannot handle rejections gracefully. Hence I either block without response, or respond then block, to prevent any comeback if I have no intention of knowing the senders of unsolicited messages.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
You silly woman, didn't you know that because you are on here you are clearly a moral free slut who is obliged to shag each and every man at the drop of a hat whenever told to ????
Seriously, some mistake a swinging site for a free brothel, and therin lies the problem
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
I really struggle with this, the amount of exposure this type of response gets must make guys realise they shouldn't reply with abuse. How often does this happen and what is said? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
We don't have a problem but if it bothers you say no thanks and block if they come back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
We don't have a problem but if it bothers you say no thanks and block if they come back. "
and then hold on tight for the barrage of threads entitled "why do woman block so much" lol |
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
I always accept a 'no thanks' with grace, what is the point in getting wound up over it. I sometimes reply with a 'thank you for taking the time to answer' and then wish them all the best. Manners cost nothing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I mostly get a thank you for the reply
Ive never had too much of a problem with the why not question because I don't get into further chat once ive said no thank you
Never had any abuse from anyone after saying no thank either,the majority of people on here that ive responded to have been more than polite  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Replyin to single guys... Damned if u do and damned if u dont. Easier not to then!?  "
Well I suppose you don't have this problem ...dan shame because your pics are amazing  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
I find these rants annoying. It just makes it more and more difficult for genuine single guys to get accepted around here.
Yes some single guys might not be able to cope with the word no - but then some single women and couples also find 'no' a difficult word to digest.
Just delete and block; simples -
Oh and for God's sake, stop moaning about it...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't really get any abusive messages, when we say no if they ask why we explain to try and be helpful so they can understand what if anything they did wrong but after the 40 emails I replied to last night I've had 5 come back and either continue the conversation or thank us for a reply the rest have deleted the message, maybe we are lucky |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
I find these rants annoying. It just makes it more and more difficult for genuine single guys to get accepted around here.
Yes some single guys might not be able to cope with the word no - but then some single women and couples also find 'no' a difficult word to digest.
Just delete and block; simples -
Oh and for God's sake, stop moaning about it... "
dont take it so personally, if u know ur not one of these guys then hold ur head hgh
but it is a serious problem on the site hwo others abuse people through rejection.. and the fact is i would think its well over 90% males who r the perpetrators as they abuse out of frustration and are the ones who look to come here for a quick shag..
the person just needs ot be advised it is the way of things on here and be educated in such things
they have the right to get upset over such matters! not everyone has been on here for as long as others and have learnt the ways.. i would think most people come on here and expect to be treated the same way they would treat others and its a bit of a wake up call when they dont,, u just learn.. but they cant learn unless educated.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I haven't had many bad responses to 'no thank you' messages and it's easy to write off the ones I do get as sour grapes and move on.
I think, to an extent, it's natural to want to know why you've been rejected. It probably wouldn't help to know, and may make you feel worse, but sometimes it's something that can be addressed.
I don't ask why when rejected as it comes across as needy and I'm unlikely to get an honest response anyway, but there have been times when I've wondered (and not just on here) in what way I didn't measure up, or why I wasn't good enough. It does no good to dwell on it though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x
I find these rants annoying. It just makes it more and more difficult for genuine single guys to get accepted around here.
Yes some single guys might not be able to cope with the word no - but then some single women and couples also find 'no' a difficult word to digest.
Just delete and block; simples -
Oh and for God's sake, stop moaning about it...
dont take it so personally, if u know ur not one of these guys then hold ur head hgh
but it is a serious problem on the site hwo others abuse people through rejection.. and the fact is i would think its well over 90% males who r the perpetrators as they abuse out of frustration and are the ones who look to come here for a quick shag..
the person just needs ot be advised it is the way of things on here and be educated in such things
they have the right to get upset over such matters! not everyone has been on here for as long as others and have learnt the ways.. i would think most people come on here and expect to be treated the same way they would treat others and its a bit of a wake up call when they dont,, u just learn.. but they cant learn unless educated.. "
OK, fair enough - I suppose I just see the same old posts - time and time again. It's funny when you come off here for awhile and then come back on and people are still moaning about the same old crap.
You're right though - cheers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always say no politely and very rarely do I get anything other than 'thanks for returning the message and have fun'. I don't judge all single males by the possible bad manners of a few because i know there are many, many nice males out there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always take no for a no ppl who dont just spoil.it for rest,,and if whoever says no eva gv in what person goin be like if they do meet he b pushy n push for it but guys like that jus spoil.it for all genuine single guys |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Same for me, no means no. I would never dream of been abusive to anyone for whatever reason. You should be able to forward abusive messages to a moderator and they can decide weather to ban people or not. And do mean ban and account deleted, 3 strikes and your out!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't mind getting the 'no thanks' to be honest. I realise women get tonnes of messages and can't reply to them all, so I find a no thanks very polite. Don't get me wrong though, I'd much rather a yes please!!! |
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"Guys always moan that they do not get a reply to their many emails they send out to girls / couples
but nearly every time i reply with a polite no it leads to a further 2 or 3 emails asking 'why do you not want to meet me?'
please guys....just accept the polite 'no' us girls send and leave it be!
x"
Your title should have read "Why can't SOME guys ......."
Not all guys are like that, so please do not tar us all with the same brush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep a polite no is fine, its when you get no reply at at that pisses me off!! Ignorant as wipes!!!"
clearly not the best line of thought...and get pissed off?...plenty more things to get pissed off with than a no reply...its only shagging ffs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I find these rants annoying. It just makes it more and more difficult for genuine single guys to get accepted around here.
Just delete and block; simples -
Oh and for God's sake, stop moaning about it... "
Amen, couldn't agree more.
Your message gets deleted and you get blocked, theres no clearer way of saying you're an ugly twat and your cock looks like its got the rot &they will not shag you in a million years
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I get a message back from a woman/couple saying no I usually send one more message just to thank them for taking the time and effort to at least reply. |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
Just a simple 'No thank you, but I appreciate the interest.'
It works and I rarely get any stroppy replies. It's nice to be nice. If they try to engage me in conversation with the hope of winning me round then I either ignore, delete or block, depending on the message. But that does not happen often, to be honest. Most guys say 'Thanks for the reply.'
I reckon that most do as most people are pretty decent - it's just a few nobheads. Don't let them make you think the site is full of them. They are the 'loud minority'. |
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By *av1970Man
over a year ago
Tattershall |
As above, where I actually get an email saying no thanks not our thing or too far away etc then I usually send one more polite along the lines of 'OK, no worries, thanks for the reply and have fun'
I have also started using the notes for when I winked/emailed so i might look again but if the notes say emailed and not interested i skip on by. |
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» Add a new message to this topic
havent felt the need to insult her yet 