FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > " spoon fed" single males
" spoon fed" single males
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely rare that's for sure as just lately all I seem to get are cheaters, one half of a couple wanting to meet and friendship requesting to wank over my pictures and those single males who chat, then stop bothering once they are on my friends list! Not forgetting those who are prepared to travel but are well over the hours limit I have continually insist that they are happy to travel, just comes across as desperate and pushy  Oh yea and the one who called me babes three times in his badly written message  |
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Finding meets whether men women or couples is like picking apples...... Theres lots about
Theres the rotten ones on the floor theyre easy to pick but dont look or taste good and you dont know where theyve been
The best and juiciest are at the top of the tree harder to get to but worth the effort
Go get a ladder and cum and get me...... Or tease and tempt me  |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but ...."
one part of me says a huge  to these guys for wanting to play on their terms and not being asked to jump when shouted
albeit, it will narrow down their chances to play.
altho
always best when it is truly a shared respect ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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this is the problem.
im reliable and i do travel sometimes a long way for the right people.
but ive had so many let me down and its cost me hotel bookings,morewhen you consider ive given up work to meet.
you can chat to people forever and think its all going to happen for it to be a let down.
i never get my hopes up until they are with me in person.
and if they let me down i block them and never speak to them again.
i dont even reply to text messages.
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but ...."
saying that.... in the interest of fairness... I know lots of couples on here that treat single guys like they are doing us a favour by meeting... and make people jump thru the exact same hoops as you describe... time, you pay for all the accom, ect ect ect...
so it does go both ways....
and your turn....... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Totally agree. It's like they think fab is our only avenue of getting laid. I've had a few regular people that I didn't even meet through fab.
I just choose to come here because i'm very open minded and there's plenty of things I haven't had chance to try or have tried once and would like to try again. And fab seems to be the ideal place for that as it's quite open about what people are into. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Finding meets whether men women or couples is like picking apples...... Theres lots about
Theres the rotten ones on the floor theyre easy to pick but dont look or taste good and you dont know where theyve been
The best and juiciest are at the top of the tree harder to get to but worth the effort
Go get a ladder and cum and get me...... Or tease and tempt me "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but ....
one part of me says a huge to these guys for wanting to play on their terms and not being asked to jump when shouted
albeit, it will narrow down their chances to play.
altho
always best when it is truly a shared respect ..."
Not asking them to do it on our terms |
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I don't see why any gender should have to jump through hoops for anyone. Sadly, it appears that men are expected to at the whim of single women/couples, so good on the single guys that know their worth and are not afraid of stating what they want out of the encounter.
That said...I'm sick to the back teeth of the single men that really do want spoon feeding: those lazy, unimaginative ones that keep posting the "help me with my profile" type threads!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I must be lucky as i only meet youngish single men and so far have met some really good ones and made a few lasting friendships, yes i get some cranky messages but its all about fun, they dont hurt just delete the message and move on to the next..  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We are highlighting an issue with some males not all. They spoil it for the rest.We are considering not meeting singles on the site.
It does not help that you have single males openly mentioning users names on this site.As one contributor recently did on this thread
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
" didnt even have the courtesy of replying to my e-mail-- a polite no thanks takes a matter of seconds to do....
"
And you could have ignored it instead of outing them on a forum for doing something they are entitled to do.
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" didnt even have the courtesy of replying to my e-mail-- a polite no thanks takes a matter of seconds to do....
And you could have ignored it instead of outing them on a forum for doing something they are entitled to do.
"
Well said |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"It seems its ok to mention names and abuse because we dare post a thread about single male issue. "
As you seem so upset I have taken it off, but he was hardly naming and shaming you and he certainly didn't abuse you, it just made him look in a bad light. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
To the OP and the posts.....for us it is always a joint respect thing...no one has to jump through hoops to get a meet. We think thats how it should work.
It doesn't spoil things for other single men if we do find a single man who we don't agree with though |
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I wonder how many of the good and reliable single guys eventually get sick of the negativity poured on men on Fab and just clear off or start getting a bit bolshy themselves?
Whereas the bad ones probably don't even read the forums and just keep being dicks anyway... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I must be lucky as i only meet youngish single men and so far have met some really good ones and made a few lasting friendships, yes i get some cranky messages but its all about fun, they dont hurt just delete the message and move on to the next.. "
However some of us prefer our own age group, and I don't think given your comment about cranky messages that age has anything to do with it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder how many of the good and reliable single guys eventually get sick of the negativity poured on men on Fab and just clear off or start getting a bit bolshy themselves?
Whereas the bad ones probably don't even read the forums and just keep being dicks anyway... "
Yes.What happens is I read the above comments, understanding on the preferences given, have a read of the issues they deal with...but I NEVER then come to the conclusion that because my preferences are narrow/specific that in turn that makes everyone else(single men)a blight on the site.
If I seek women aged 18-20 and i'm getting nothing back from mails, or getting timewasters etc etc...should I then start moaning like fuck about the site being full of timewasting feamales?
answer: NO
3 no shows in a week etc?-blahhblahh...if I'm a single guy doing better than this in statistical terms at not getting my time wasted..what am I doing so right, that others cant?
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I've never really had any issues on site.
Yes, the majority of my messages go unanswered (often unread) - but that goes with the territory.
Yes, I've had couples who wanted a meet but on their unreasonable terms - they get told thanks but no thanks.
Timewasters? Never really had that, bar a couple of 'might see you at the club' ones that never appeared, but that's not really a no show is it?
'Endless ping pong messaging' - no issue here, I like chatting to people and some of my long term chats (over a year or do in some cases) have eventually become very memorable meets.
Fab is what you make it, treat the right prople right and you have fun.
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Im sick to death of hearing peeps moan about single males  "
The whole point of meeting is for 'mutual' fun buy 'mutually'interested parties.
Its not about one person thinking they are doing the other a favour and therefore the other demanded or expected to be grateful: that goes for guys, girls or couples alike. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why oh why do single men get such a hard deal on this site?
Surely it's about mutural fun! Not just what the single male can bring to a meet? And why shouldn't they have a say in things and have some terms and conditions? We would never want a single male to feel like they were doing us a favour!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why oh why do single men get such a hard deal on this site?
Surely it's about mutural fun! Not just what the single male can bring to a meet? And why shouldn't they have a say in things and have some terms and conditions? We would never want a single male to feel like they were doing us a favour!
"
I've no problem licking ur flavour  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Not all single males.We said that. Most of our recent messages have been from single males.Only one or two were happy to mutually arrange a possible meet.The rest became disinterested if we didn't respond on their terms.Travel to meet them,immediate meeting etc.
We UNDERSTAND its compromise we just highlighted a growing perception in our experience.
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"I wonder how many of the good and reliable single guys eventually get sick of the negativity poured on men on Fab and just clear off or start getting a bit bolshy themselves?
Whereas the bad ones probably don't even read the forums and just keep being dicks anyway... "
well said couldnt agree more. In a way this constant need people have to moan about single men is a bit how rascism works. one bad experience with a person from a different ethnicity and people with a rascist disposition start tarring all people with that ethnicity as being the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not all single males.We said that. Most of our recent messages have been from single males.Only one or two were happy to mutually arrange a possible meet.The rest became disinterested if we didn't respond on their terms.Travel to meet them,immediate meeting etc.
We UNDERSTAND its compromise we just highlighted a growing perception in our experience.
"
well...its nice to rant back too lol |
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"It seems its ok to mention names and abuse because we dare post a thread about single male issue. "
Surely its NOT just a single male issue
Time wasters and seal trainers come in all shapes,sizes and orientation.
I dont think theres anyone thats been on here for a while thats not had 100% satisfaction.
If you level a thread at one specific group youll get members of said group baring their teeth..... Make love not war and concentrate on the good things on this forum instead of ALL the bad things
I see most of these threads as look at me style postings for even more ego polishing |
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"It seems its ok to mention names and abuse because we dare post a thread about single male issue.
Surely its NOT just a single male issue
Time wasters and seal trainers come in all shapes,sizes and orientation.
I dont think theres anyone thats been on here for a while thats not had 100% satisfaction.
If you level a thread at one specific group youll get members of said group baring their teeth..... Make love not war and concentrate on the good things on this forum instead of ALL the bad things
I see most of these threads as look at me style postings for even more ego polishing "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It was our experience so we could only comment on what has happened to us. Once again we never said all males and what has happened to us is truthful . As a couple we tend to get more messages from males and many are after quick gratification and sorry to say again, but strictly on their terms. We comprise and have travelled and paid for hotels etc. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It seems its ok to mention names and abuse because we dare post a thread about single male issue.
Surely its NOT just a single male issue
Time wasters and seal trainers come in all shapes,sizes and orientation.
I dont think theres anyone thats been on here for a while thats not had 100% satisfaction.
If you level a thread at one specific group youll get members of said group baring their teeth..... Make love not war and concentrate on the good things on this forum instead of ALL the bad things
I see most of these threads as look at me style postings for even more ego polishing "
Ego .........Adult forums we think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately there are a lot of single males that are pushy demanding and think they hold the cards but from what I have sene there are time wasters on both sides. Yes it takes time to build trust and yes you will get the opportunist cheater but u also get the odd genuine person that gets swamped in all the politics of it all |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Why oh why do single men get such a hard deal on this site?
Surely it's about mutural fun! Not just what the single male can bring to a meet? And why shouldn't they have a say in things and have some terms and conditions? We would never want a single male to feel like they were doing us a favour!
"
There is a purported myth that everything wrong with swinging is down to "single males".
Some couples actively believe there is no room for single males on the scene and some have gone so far as to request a "couples only" chat room (but some reason single females are welcome to that chat room"
A site I used to actively use even used to hold its site socials at a venue on a "couples only" night thereby eliminating the possibility the single guys could attend - while charging single guys more in subscription for the use of the site.
Takes all sorts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why oh why do single men get such a hard deal on this site?
Surely it's about mutural fun! Not just what the single male can bring to a meet? And why shouldn't they have a say in things and have some terms and conditions? We would never want a single male to feel like they were doing us a favour!
There is a purported myth that everything wrong with swinging is down to "single males".
Some couples actively believe there is no room for single males on the scene and some have gone so far as to request a "couples only" chat room (but some reason single females are welcome to that chat room"
A site I used to actively use even used to hold its site socials at a venue on a "couples only" night thereby eliminating the possibility the single guys could attend - while charging single guys more in subscription for the use of the site.
Takes all sorts."
Ahabs I'm sure I met you at chams over a year ago I was taken there by Angie how are you doing was a pleasure chatting to you back then |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why oh why do single men get such a hard deal on this site?
Surely it's about mutural fun! Not just what the single male can bring to a meet? And why shouldn't they have a say in things and have some terms and conditions? We would never want a single male to feel like they were doing us a favour!
There is a purported myth that everything wrong with swinging is down to "single males".
Some couples actively believe there is no room for single males on the scene and some have gone so far as to request a "couples only" chat room (but some reason single females are welcome to that chat room"
A site I used to actively use even used to hold its site socials at a venue on a "couples only" night thereby eliminating the possibility the single guys could attend - while charging single guys more in subscription for the use of the site.
Takes all sorts."
No never.We enjoy meeting single males just not the timewasters |
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As a single male I read the forum 5 or 6 times daily I find some really funny and it makes me laugh what I do find annoying is a lot of single guys do let you lady's down a lot and that makes it harder for us genuine ones I haven't had a meet yet but there's no real rush for me just take it when it comes and just enjoy the forum provided you are not all sick of single guys by then and blocked us all  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i must admit i do get sick of people complaining about single guys letting them down,sending crass messages etc.
well people. im real and i meet.
turn up when arranged every time and im polite,respectful.
yet seem to be thrown in the same bucket as the rest because you couples and singles most moan about us.
do not do your homework and pick out crap.
im sick of hearing about your failings. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What I am finding very rude and quite offensive spending time looking at a profile reading it making sure that I fit the criteria before sending a message. Spending time writing the message. Wait for a reply even if it's no thank u to find its been deleted and the goal posts have been changed.WHY and yes I know there loss and move on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but ...."
You have been unlucky! Are they men you choose or ones that message you first? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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single guys are responsible for:
famine in africa.
polar caps melting.
depleted o-zone layers.
chavs.
council tax.
and starbucks not paying enough tax.
sick of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"single guys are responsible for:
famine in africa.
polar caps melting.
depleted o-zone layers.
chavs.
council tax.
and starbucks not paying enough tax.
sick of it. "
Goes with the territory of being male mate sorry we are the lesser sex now or so it seems lol |
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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago
Midlothian |
all our MMF meets have been fantastic!!!
Not because we lucky but because we(well mainly me susie) exchange friendly,respectfull messages.It only takes a few,or 1 reply lol, to see if we suitable for him or he for us.Its a natural flow than:flirting,chatting + matching up diarys
Some guys we meet faster than others simply due to circumstances like meeting @ a social we all were going to anyway...or partys.Others take longer because neither we nor him are yet free but we all happy to wait till the day comes...again respect+understanding.
Well we'll continue to have great meets with fun Fabsters ......the not fun ones will have to find their own matches,enjoy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I see people moan/vent/rant - whatever you want to call it.
I can sometimes see the reasoning behind their _iew - other times - I disagree.
Does any of it, especially the threads bemoaning single guys, want me to pack up and move on?
No.
I'm enjoying my life on site and know far more in the same situation. Couples, single girls and single guys. We all suffer setbacks, letdowns and frustrations. But this is meant to be fun - not stressful.
Enjoy the good, learn from the bad - and if needs be - adjust, evolve or take a break.
Life goes on! |
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"all our MMF meets have been fantastic!!!
Not because we lucky but because we(well mainly me susie) exchange friendly,respectfull messages.It only takes a few,or 1 reply lol, to see if we suitable for him or he for us.Its a natural flow than:flirting,chatting + matching up diarys
Some guys we meet faster than others simply due to circumstances like meeting @ a social we all were going to anyway...or partys.Others take longer because neither we nor him are yet free but we all happy to wait till the day comes...again respect+understanding.
Well we'll continue to have great meets with fun Fabsters ......the not fun ones will have to find their own matches,enjoy "
Spot on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The way we see this is :
You have a site here that contains a huge mix of people all here for various reasons. Just like real life.
Because of the nature of the site a percentage of those are going to be here just to _iew and dream. Much more so than say a gardening website and forum.
Another percentage of those are going to be people you are not attracted to or don't like for whatever reason.
Another percentage will have a profile you will read and think no way. And so it goes on.
The beauty of this site is unlike real life it has a block button.
Just use it. If someone messages you and you don't like the message, or their profile offends you just block them. You won't have to deal with it again then.
Being let down is more problematic but we have never been let down without a damn good reason. And neither have most of our friends on here and other sites we have been on. Is it really that rife? Or are the minority making a lot of noise?
If you get let down. Yes it's annoying but Block them and move on making sure you do your best to avoid it in future.
It is supposed to be fun. Don't let it wind you up. There are more than enough decent genuine fun people here for everyone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"single guys are responsible for:
famine in africa.
polar caps melting.
depleted o-zone layers.
chavs.
council tax.
and starbucks not paying enough tax.
sick of it. "
Ridiculous comment as not true |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So much has been written about single males and we don't mean to be negative. We recognize there are reliable men on here but their becoming rare.
We get lots of messages from males wanting us to meet on their terms.Arrange the accommodation, meet when they say etc. No compromise . Many seem unprepared to even travel a short distance. Won't even dwell on the short, rude and crude messages.
Rant we know but ....
You have been unlucky! Are they men you choose or ones that message you first?"
Message us. |
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Well, I must say by your profile you are a very sensual and wonderful couple (Mgtf1) and seemingly very genuine.
Any man mistreating you guys or being overly demanding ie meeting on his terms would be very foolish indeed in that he would miss out on what I am sure would be a very sensual & erotic night.
There are timewasters on here and foolish young men however there are also some very genuine men here too and I think their verifications should go some way to reflect that. Maybe I am old fashioned but I think the man should still make the effort for the lady even if she is part of a couple and couples should recognise genuine gentlemen and treat them accordingly. Maybe I am in a minority but I believe, even in swinging, men should be gentlemen.
Thats my humble opinion |
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