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Serious question
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
Hi all...me and my wife have been married over 30 years and started off like everyone with a great sex life..then as time went by the sex part of our marriage dwindled like it does to the extent we went a few years without sex at all...now we are mid fifties and my wife wants sex almost all the time which I can't really deliver...my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question. |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"Your profile says your looking for a woman, if your wife is to much for you then why would you be wanting another ? "
I do need to update that..it is a couple I would like us to meet..
I came here initially on my own and she doesn't actually know I am here but literally within the last few weeks she has really had the horn do to speak.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question. "
I think you should respect that she isn’t interested in swinging, if she has always been against it then.  |
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If she’s totally against it then I assume you’ve already had a conversation about swinging? Did you discuss the possibility of her getting a lover or both of you swinging? It may be worth letting her know you’d be comfortable with letting her meet other men but she may not feel as happy about you meeting people. Is she aware you’re on here looking for women?
We’re in a similar length relationship to you and, I’ll be brutally honest, if my husband was on here looking for women but unable to satisfy my needs I’d be fuming. If he couldn’t have sex with me I’d hope it was because he couldn’t/didn’t want it with anyone.
Swinging isn’t for everyone and may well ruin a relationship if both parties aren’t on board.
Lou x
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question.
I think you should respect that she isn’t interested in swinging, if she has always been against it then. "
Which is why I posed the question and hoping to gauge opinion, maybe off people who have experienced similar. |
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"Hi all...me and my wife have been married over 30 years and started off like everyone with a great sex life..then as time went by the sex part of our marriage dwindled like it does to the extent we went a few years without sex at all...now we are mid fifties and my wife wants sex almost all the time which I can't really deliver...my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question. "
Personally I wouldn’t go there if she’s against it then leave it
Even tho you can’t deliver she can amuse herself or just have the power we don’t to do without lees you don’t value your marriage anymore |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question.
I think you should respect that she isn’t interested in swinging, if she has always been against it then.
Which is why I posed the question and hoping to gauge opinion, maybe off people who have experienced similar. "
But in all fairness other opinions don’t matter surely? If your wife doesn’t want to do something then that’s it. You must have had a conversation about it to know she is against it… |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"Show her your profile and see if she wants to join you.
You can't keep up with her but are looking for others?"
Thank you I will try that...I do want to make my wife satisfied but after quite a few barren years where we didn't have any type of sex it is a bit of a struggle to get back into the swing of things..not that the love has gone that will always be there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it only been a couple of weeks of high sex drive then you give it a bit longer to see if it is bot just a flash in the pan
If it continues then ask what has caused the increase and based on that discussion you may know better what she wants |
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By *entDomMan
over a year ago
Paddock Wood, Kent |
I would agree with others who have posted. Do it in small steps. Tell her you want her to be sexually satisfied and that swinging might be an answer. Make sure she knows that is fine by you. Tell her you will talk about and set when that will be. If you don't do that then the conversation will not happen. Give that time to sink in and for her to get her head around it.
Go from there. But you need to get things right in your head too. Do you want to be there? Do you want to organise meets? You want meets at yours? Do you want her to choose guys,? Stuff like that |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"I would agree with others who have posted. Do it in small steps. Tell her you want her to be sexually satisfied and that swinging might be an answer. Make sure she knows that is fine by you. Tell her you will talk about and set when that will be. If you don't do that then the conversation will not happen. Give that time to sink in and for her to get her head around it.
Go from there. But you need to get things right in your head too. Do you want to be there? Do you want to organise meets? You want meets at yours? Do you want her to choose guys,? Stuff like that "
That is a very good statement and questions you have posted ..I dont quite know where where I want to take this..it may be because I wasn't getting the satisfaction I craved at home that I joined here but having posted my original question I now ask myself is it mine or my wife's interests at heart..thank you to all who have commented on this and maybe my head isn't thinking right about what I want and what I believe she may or may not want.. |
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By *iliciousCouple
over a year ago
Sussex/Surrey |
"Show her your profile and see if she wants to join you.
You can't keep up with her but are looking for others?
Thank you I will try that...I do want to make my wife satisfied but after quite a few barren years where we didn't have any type of sex it is a bit of a struggle to get back into the swing of things..not that the love has gone that will always be there. "
Suggest you go to couples therapy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Next time you have sex blindfold her. I’ll be waiting outside. We’ll do the old switcheroo and I’ll give her the best 2 minutes of her life then we swap back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi all...me and my wife have been married over 30 years and started off like everyone with a great sex life..then as time went by the sex part of our marriage dwindled like it does to the extent we went a few years without sex at all...now we are mid fifties and my wife wants sex almost all the time which I can't really deliver...my question is shall I introduce her to swinging which she has always been against just so she can gain the satisfaction I can't deliver? This is a serious question. "
Its someone that both of you have to be fully aware of what you both want.. if you just want her to meet other guys for sex then would you be able to cope with that? Would you want to be involved? These are i think your biggest questions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP have you got any sex toys dildos that you could use on your wife at least then you can see the joy on here face when playing if she's not fussed on the idea of swinging just a thought  |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"OP have you got any sex toys dildos that you could use on your wife at least then you can see the joy on here face when playing if she's not fussed on the idea of swinging just a thought "
We discussed toys last week and she didn't seem averse to the idea...it just seems so confusing to me personally for her to not be really interested in sex then almost all of a sudden wanting it all the time so maybe a toy can help her before seeing whether we dive into other avenues |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP have you got any sex toys dildos that you could use on your wife at least then you can see the joy on here face when playing if she's not fussed on the idea of swinging just a thought
We discussed toys last week and she didn't seem averse to the idea...it just seems so confusing to me personally for her to not be really interested in sex then almost all of a sudden wanting it all the time so maybe a toy can help her before seeing whether we dive into other avenues "
yes |
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"OP have you got any sex toys dildos that you could use on your wife at least then you can see the joy on here face when playing if she's not fussed on the idea of swinging just a thought
We discussed toys last week and she didn't seem averse to the idea...it just seems so confusing to me personally for her to not be really interested in sex then almost all of a sudden wanting it all the time so maybe a toy can help her before seeing whether we dive into other avenues "
A toy is a whole lot different to an actual living, breathing man |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP have you got any sex toys dildos that you could use on your wife at least then you can see the joy on here face when playing if she's not fussed on the idea of swinging just a thought
We discussed toys last week and she didn't seem averse to the idea...it just seems so confusing to me personally for her to not be really interested in sex then almost all of a sudden wanting it all the time so maybe a toy can help her before seeing whether we dive into other avenues
A toy is a whole lot different to an actual living, breathing man"
I do know! It was only a suggestion as the OP said his wife isn't sure about swinging that's all |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
At the minute my head is all over the place...I orally and if you will pardon the expression finger pleasure her but when she wants that bit more I come up a little short..it frustrates both me and her...I know I should talk to her and possibly a therapist to try to overcome this problem but I wanted to gauge opinion.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At the minute my head is all over the place...I orally and if you will pardon the expression finger pleasure her but when she wants that bit more I come up a little short..it frustrates both me and her...I know I should talk to her and possibly a therapist to try to overcome this problem but I wanted to gauge opinion.."
Are you saying you cant get erections when your with your wife OP? Or is a case of cuming to soon?
If so why are your looking for other women behind her back?
KJ |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"At the minute my head is all over the place...I orally and if you will pardon the expression finger pleasure her but when she wants that bit more I come up a little short..it frustrates both me and her...I know I should talk to her and possibly a therapist to try to overcome this problem but I wanted to gauge opinion..
Are you saying you cant get erections when your with your wife OP? Or is a case of cuming to soon?
If so why are your looking for other women behind her back?
KJ"
Getting an erection isn't the issue but maintaining it has become a problem..I came on here and I won't lie about is to try to get the oomph back..now my wife has become sexually active again it is isn't exactly a problem but mentally I am all over the place...complicated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You can speak with her about it, explain you feel you can't keep up and would like to know she is fulfilled, but........
If she's so against it, and you've already joined here looking to play away, you might well be opening a can of worms.
Be careful what you wish for. |
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By *igging OP Man
over a year ago
Oldham |
"You can speak with her about it, explain you feel you can't keep up and would like to know she is fulfilled, but........
If she's so against it, and you've already joined here looking to play away, you might well be opening a can of worms.
Be careful what you wish for."
Yeah I understand that. |
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