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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok I'll go first.. we were at a house party. He gets frisky we got to bathroom I ride him grabbed the toilet seat. Broke the tank it rained down into the kitchen with 20 people there. To this day they call it the "porcelain incedent".  |
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"Ok I'll go first.. we were at a house party. He gets frisky we got to bathroom I ride him grabbed the toilet seat. Broke the tank it rained down into the kitchen with 20 people there. To this day they call it the "porcelain incedent". "
Or perhaps the 'porcelain indecent'.
Can I even do that? Make an anagram from an incorrectly spelled word? Is that allowed? |
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Was carp fishing with gf and we were quite close to her dad just a few bushes between us and yes he poped his head round to see how i was doing and he saw his daughter sucking my cock ! He just moved away and called out to us about 39 mins later to ask how we were doing !!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Was carp fishing with gf and we were quite close to her dad just a few bushes between us and yes he poped his head round to see how i was doing and he saw his daughter sucking my cock ! He just moved away and called out to us about 39 mins later to ask how we were doing !!!!"
lol
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Not quite a sexual experience, I was dressing in a club and the area was a bit tight. I was struggling with a rear suspender to attach to a stocking top , you know how it is, only I got the lady dressing next to me suspender clip instead and attached that to my stocking. There was me thinking I finally got the bugger on.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not quite a sexual experience, I was dressing in a club and the area was a bit tight. I was struggling with a rear suspender to attach to a stocking top , you know how it is, only I got the lady dressing next to me suspender clip instead and attached that to my stocking. There was me thinking I finally got the bugger on.
"
lol |
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By *alguyMan
over a year ago
Gibraltar & Manchester |
Back when we were students my housemate had a girlfriend who was at uni in another city so they only saw each other at weekends. Of course student life is 24/7 and we'd been out mid-week and my housemate ended up walking another young lady home... like students do...
Anyway he came crawling in next day with hugest love bite on his neck! His girlfriend was due that weekend of course.
So, without running it past me first, he concocts this story that me and him had been playing squash (I've still never played a game in my life to this day!) and I'd whacked the ball and it hit him on the neck.
Somehow he (or we) got away with it! She actually believed him!
So, all well and good.
Until we were out the following week and, being a bit merry when we all staggered in, we all jumped on my housemate's bed in a massive pile on.
And we broke his bed.
We managed to fix it with some bits from B&Q and it was almost as good as new.
But his girlfriend was having none of it. "You've had some slapper in here!" and belted him straight across the face!
Well... he had that coming really didn't he??? |
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By *entDomMan
over a year ago
Paddock Wood, Kent |
Well I'd had a night out with the lads and had the mother of all hangovers. To my surprise I'm lying in bed with the ex and she for some reason is sympathetic for a change and gets me tablets etc. She is stroking my head and the headache is subsiding somewhat.
Then I get the "hangover horn" so I thought to myself, why not....
Anyway I'm on top, still groggy but everything is going well, then suddenly cramp in my calf. Not the one that you feel coming, the one where it feels like someone has grabbed your muscle and us running off down the road with it!
Anyway I jump up in agony, my leg rigid in spasm and I'm desperately trying to stop the pain. My head is now going "BOOM BOOM BOOM".
Picture the scene I'm dancing round naked in agony sporting a hard on I don't know whether to hold my head or my leg. To make things worse I've trodden on a magazine which is now stuck to the bottom of my good foot, and I'm trying to shake that free.
And all she can do is laugh! |
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