FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Has a follow up response ever changed your mind?
Has a follow up response ever changed your mind?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So having spoke to a lot of swingers, the reason many dont respond to messages they're not interested in is they normally get a message trying to persuade them in response.
"It doesnt have to be like that" etc.
I have on more than one one occassion been guilty of this so now just reply thanking for the response.
My question is, has anyone ever sent a rejection message and then actually had their mind changed by the response? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope, if I say no and the person doesn't take the no as the answer and instead tries to persuade me otherwise I think it only makes them look desperate and creepy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For us, after we’ve said no any further attempts is seen as pushy which results in them being blocked.
Yes.
It's changed my mind from "maybe later" to "block""
Same  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For us, after we’ve said no any further attempts is seen as pushy which results in them being blocked.
Yes.
It's changed my mind from "maybe later" to "block"
Same "
Total this!
Some people don't realise not what I'm looking for may change in the future.
We have met someone we initially said no to because they were very graceous and polite at the time. So when our pursuits changed they ended up on our radar.
We know a couple who reject everyone at first as they feel how they handle it / respond is a great character insight. Not our way of doing things but it's an interesting approach.
KJ |
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"For us, after we’ve said no any further attempts is seen as pushy which results in them being blocked.
Yes.
It's changed my mind from "maybe later" to "block"
Same
Total this!
Some people don't realise not what I'm looking for may change in the future.
We have met someone we initially said no to because they were very graceous and polite at the time. So when our pursuits changed they ended up on our radar.
We know a couple who reject everyone at first as they feel how they handle it / respond is a great character insight. Not our way of doing things but it's an interesting approach.
KJ"
I can absolutely see it.
I've had some follow ups where I've thought "this person doesn't respect my wishes". That's dangerous and an absolute block. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are always polite and often forward with our response.
If we express we're not interested and wish them well in their search, they reply with something to persuade us, a plea so to speak.
It won't change our minds, we will reply again politely and wish them well, beyond that if they push again, we'll see that as not being able to take No for an answer, so it actually strengthens our initial view.
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"Total this!
Some people don't realise not what I'm looking for may change in the future.
We have met someone we initially said no to because they were very graceous and polite at the time. So when our pursuits changed they ended up on our radar."
I was fortunate to have experienced something exactly like this though another site, some years ago...
My initial message to them as a couple received a "Thanks, but you're not what we're looking for", to which I responded - as I often do - along the lines of "Thanks for taking the time to reply, I hope you find what you're seeking"...
....quite a long time afterwards - certainly many months, maybe even a year - I got a message out of the blue, asking if I was free one day the next week, and I ended up spending an afternoon enjoying a very sexy blonde while her husband was out of the country for a few days...
....she told me afterwards that when he'd suggested that she could have some fun while he was gone, he'd also suggested that it was with me; my courteous response - rather than the usual type that they got to 'rejections' - had left a favourable impression...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So having spoke to a lot of swingers, the reason many dont respond to messages they're not interested in is they normally get a message trying to persuade them in response.
"It doesnt have to be like that" etc.
I have on more than one one occassion been guilty of this so now just reply thanking for the response.
My question is, has anyone ever sent a rejection message and then actually had their mind changed by the response?"
No
Anyone who sends those kind of messages just shows me they don't respect my boundaries or my preferences |
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If it ever reaches a point where I have to say no it means they haven't read my profile in the first place.
If they then follow that up by trying to persuade me otherwise it proves they haven't read it and are more interested in their own agenda. |
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As a whole, if i say no, any future messages are just deleted. Love the notes section for this reason, reminds me why i said no. However that said, a guy sent me a message but id decided he wasnt for me …. Dont like to play on my doorstep as a rule, he messaged me another day and now we are together 7 months still going strong  |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Nope it has never worked with me .
I have on occasion being persuaded to chat after I've made it clear I'm not interested in meeting. But after too many deciding that chatting means I will then meet them I now no longer just chat anymore. Especially after recently when someone after chatting a few times asked to meet for coffee when I said no that I had said at the start I wouldn't be interested he then decided that I should be interested in meeting him for sex. So after that I've decided that I can't be bothered even just chatting anymore.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope it has never worked with me .
I have on occasion being persuaded to chat after I've made it clear I'm not interested in meeting. But after too many deciding that chatting means I will then meet them I now no longer just chat anymore. Especially after recently when someone after chatting a few times asked to meet for coffee when I said no that I had said at the start I wouldn't be interested he then decided that I should be interested in meeting him for sex. So after that I've decided that I can't be bothered even just chatting anymore.
"
Such a pity he spoiled it for the rest of us |
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"So having spoke to a lot of swingers, the reason many dont respond to messages they're not interested in is they normally get a message trying to persuade them in response.
"It doesnt have to be like that" etc.
I have on more than one one occassion been guilty of this so now just reply thanking for the response.
My question is, has anyone ever sent a rejection message and then actually had their mind changed by the response?"
The reason we don't respond to messages are :- it's all on our profile. The biggest is, we always have a meet or status up if and when we're looking. Messaging offering us meets at other times is pointless. Daily we get offers, but if they'd bothered to read. We wouldnt be the bad guys by not replying.
Second is offering us a Dom ect. Something again we're not looking for. Along with voyuers, if they message and offer so something we clearly don't want or looking for why should we reply? And no it won't change our mind by re messaging. Mind you we've normally blocked them before they can re message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ive never actually tried a convincing response, if i get a no thank you i usually just reply saying thank you for the reply and happy hunting "
Same here just thank them for the reply and wish them well and then move on. Anything else just makes you look a sad act in my honest opinion but some guys just can't accept rejection i'm afraid. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"For us, after we’ve said no any further attempts is seen as pushy which results in them being blocked.
Yes.
It's changed my mind from "maybe later" to "block""
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