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Non functioning doggers!

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By *uckslut and M OP   Couple  over a year ago

Poole

We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Great pretenders

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By *ellinever70Woman  over a year ago

Ayrshire

Did he share his pork pies?

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By *iniskirtcoupleCouple  over a year ago

Lincoln + roadtrips

Most of them are married, which is why they won't risk having condoms on them.

They're also generally not getting any action at home, so they're inexperienced and nervous - which is why they blow fast or go soft.

And the ones who only want to watch and not participate are generally the ones who are too nervous to even try.

You will get lucky and find the odd star performer, who'll put on a show and fuck you like a porn star.

Although, Miniskirt's happy for them to come fast because she's not interested in being banged for hours out there. It's not what she goes dogging for.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Maybe they were just voyeurs. I no very little about the dogging scene I always just assumed I high percentage of those in attendance were there to watch not take part.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We tend to go now and invite people along who we've met before. That way we're guaranteed to get some action.

The impromptu nights have usually ended in a similar situation to you

M x

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By *eedsmale36Man  over a year ago

Leeds


"We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking. "

PMSL : eating a pork pie

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By *mashingPumpkinMan  over a year ago

Carmarthen

That’s the funniest thing I’ve read in ages I like mustard on my pork pie.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What did you say to the police when they turned up?


"We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That was absolutely hilarious! Are you sure it was a pork pie...

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By *remiumbondMan  over a year ago

Morpeth

Pork pie Ha Ha …… I’d be eating the hairy pie

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I bet it wasnt a Melton Mowbray pie either...you can tell who's a man by the pie they eat..his was more likely a farm foods budget pie..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A fucking pork pie? Wouldn’t be kissing that guy, that’s for sure. What is wrong with people.

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By *urenutsMan  over a year ago

waltham cross/Harrow HA1


"We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking. "

I feel your pain. Its also hilarious. Turn up to dogging eating a pork pie. When you walking off,wait a few more minutes.

Hence dogging died out

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A fucking pork pie? Wouldn’t be kissing that guy, that’s for sure. What is wrong with people.

"

Sharing is caring

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple  over a year ago

Back of the bins.


"We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking. "

Heck, what brand was the pork pie? Afaf

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By *herryEatersCouple  over a year ago

East Cheshire

Ha... we won't be dogging for sure. Meat and potato pie for us !... Maybe try a different dogging spot, drive a little further ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Dogging in the Iceland car park again??

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By *onnie 90Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"Ha... we won't be dogging for sure. Meat and potato pie for us !... Maybe try a different dogging spot, drive a little further ?"

Yep. To a place they eat proper chunky steak pies. Then you'll know you've found a real man!

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By *ev_1Couple  over a year ago

Bickliegh


"We go dogging, a long with many of our other interests. We've found more and more those who cannot or will not perform. Why go out dogging?

Our last adventure, chatting to 4 men. Saying nothing had happened over the 3 day bank holiday. Them saying they wish something would happen ect. Fast forward, I give one a bj he comes. Next one says, he fuck if he had a condom. Why go looking for sex, and not have condoms? Mr hands him a condom, he puts it on, it gose soft. So thats never gonna happen. So my Mr fucks me, shooting a load in me. Hoping the show might get them going. A few more turn up. Then a rather akward 5 mins, no ones hard, so they get cocks out wanking. Ones eating a pork pie, ones smoking. Then one says he's gonna blow, so give him a bj. After 10 mins still nothing. I'm getting bored by now! So my Mr, fucks and shoots his second load in me. Yes, even at his age he puts the youngesters to shame. As we're going back to the car, one says, give him a few more mins and he's ready. Sorry, but you had it on a plate, we're going home.

We're finding this type of evening more and more. Those who can't and won't. Plus them not taking condoms, and moaning nothing ever happens. Is it just us? I'm always dressed sexy, don't think I fell out the ugly tree. We go out dogging to find action, not talk about it. No wonder couples don't bother going out.

Please no messages offering to meet us dogging. As profile says, we have a meet uo if we're looking. "

hence this is why we don't do dogging don't forget the ones ho don't shower straight from work and don't get us going on track suits lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Each to their own but the one experience I had of dogging showed it was not for me.

Some bloke walked behind my car and I lost sight of him and genuinely wondered if he'd gone underneath!

Then when the couple I was meeting turned up, the car was swarmed and I was not playing in that!

Then they left leading a goddamn convoy!

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