FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > It's not just hard for single men..
It's not just hard for single men..
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away 
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait.. "
We would have had a chat but we are blocked |
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"On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait.. "
We do try but I mustn’t be good enough |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait..
We do try but I mustn’t be good enough "
Love a hi-viz jacket |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Guys find it hard getting a profiles to connect to and keep things more interesting than the 100 others in a female/couples inbox. But single females have the pain in the arse task of actually getting time to read though the very small few worth reading after deleting the 100s of worthless ones .
They should have a premium section that you pay more for , would stop the time wasters from being able to message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m new to online adventures, but this is hard work ,when you are polite sum say “it’s not Facebook “go the other way your a perv sorry you’ve not got any veris can’t meet you loads of veris your a player lol mmmm I don’t know ???? |
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I agree, it’s not easy. Sometimes I get so bogged down with the rude and vulgar that I know I am probably missing out on a gem, so we keep plugging.
I’m yet to find one that ticks all the boxes but I wont compromise on connection and respect x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree, it’s not easy. Sometimes I get so bogged down with the rude and vulgar that I know I am probably missing out on a gem, so we keep plugging.
I’m yet to find one that ticks all the boxes but I wont compromise on connection and respect x "
My thoughts exactly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait.. "
That's the way I see it too, to keep plugging away. This is a game of patience I'm finding. |
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"It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option. "
Admittedly some days it is easier than others, but they are not always as polite as a that. Just mean that it gets to you after a while.
Why would we delete our accounts, we want to meet people? But I do hide it every now and again to take a break and regain perspective X |
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By *J198911Man
over a year ago
United Kingdom |
I may or may not be in the process of developing a site for the future where I hopefully eliminate all of these issues women and men face. The numbers will be equal on both sides and not such a huge difference |
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"Guys find it hard getting a profiles to connect to and keep things more interesting than the 100 others in a female/couples inbox. But single females have the pain in the arse task of actually getting time to read though the very small few worth reading after deleting the 100s of worthless ones .
They should have a premium section that you pay more for , would stop the time wasters from being able to message. "
No, that wouldn't stop time wasters, it would stop people without as much disposable cash.
People with plenty of money can be time wasters too (as is evident with some of the dating sites out there) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option.
Admittedly some days it is easier than others, but they are not always as polite as a that. Just mean that it gets to you after a while.
Why would we delete our accounts, we want to meet people? But I do hide it every now and again to take a break and regain perspective X"
Exactly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I may or may not be in the process of developing a site for the future where I hopefully eliminate all of these issues women and men face. The numbers will be equal on both sides and not such a huge difference "
Sounds a plan |
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"It's called message filters.
Correct OP but I want to meet men so can't really turn that off  "
I see some women set their age range to 98-99, which stops men contacting them, and means the lady herself can do her own searching, and message those guys she’s interested in, rather than getting frustrated with an overloaded inbox. Maybe try this for a while? x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's called message filters.
Correct OP but I want to meet men so can't really turn that off
I see some women set their age range to 98-99, which stops men contacting them, and means the lady herself can do her own searching, and message those guys she’s interested in, rather than getting frustrated with an overloaded inbox. Maybe try this for a while? x"
Can't join in the forum stuff if you do that. I enjoy the forum stuff! I keep my inbox open and take the bad with the good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option. "
Not if there's no nuggets.
Some men seem to think women should just accept any offer. I'd rather dry up like a husk than fuck someone I'm not attracted to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Guys find it hard getting a profiles to connect to and keep things more interesting than the 100 others in a female/couples inbox. But single females have the pain in the arse task of actually getting time to read though the very small few worth reading after deleting the 100s of worthless ones .
They should have a premium section that you pay more for , would stop the time wasters from being able to message.
No, that wouldn't stop time wasters, it would stop people without as much disposable cash.
People with plenty of money can be time wasters too (as is evident with some of the dating sites out there) "
 Also paying any money makes some people entitled and they assume they are guaranteed sex because "they paid for it". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's called message filters.
Correct OP but I want to meet men so can't really turn that off
I see some women set their age range to 98-99, which stops men contacting them, and means the lady herself can do her own searching, and message those guys she’s interested in, rather than getting frustrated with an overloaded inbox. Maybe try this for a while? x"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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filters are the best way to stop unwanted messages, unsolicited pics etc.
I set mine so I can do the searching for what I want, and don't have to deal with the endless crap that takes up all your time
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"I’m new to online adventures, but this is hard work ,when you are polite sum say “it’s not Facebook “go the other way your a perv sorry you’ve not got any veris can’t meet you loads of veris your a player lol mmmm I don’t know ????"
Maybe read profiles and react to them accordingly.
Like if a profile says they don't want to meet for socials - I'll not message them at all because if we do - they'll say "I have friends in real life for that".
If a profile asks for socials - we'll not message them saying "wanna fuck" because obviously they'll just tell us to fuck off.
Reading profiles is CRUCIAL!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m new to online adventures, but this is hard work ,when you are polite sum say “it’s not Facebook “go the other way your a perv sorry you’ve not got any veris can’t meet you loads of veris your a player lol mmmm I don’t know ????
Maybe read profiles and react to them accordingly.
Like if a profile says they don't want to meet for socials - I'll not message them at all because if we do - they'll say "I have friends in real life for that".
If a profile asks for socials - we'll not message them saying "wanna fuck" because obviously they'll just tell us to fuck off.
Reading profiles is CRUCIAL!
"
Tits! Ugg ugg
*scratches bollocks and starts wanking* |
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I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week |
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"Guys find it hard getting a profiles to connect to and keep things more interesting than the 100 others in a female/couples inbox. But single females have the pain in the arse task of actually getting time to read though the very small few worth reading after deleting the 100s of worthless ones .
They should have a premium section that you pay more for , would stop the time wasters from being able to message.
No, that wouldn't stop time wasters, it would stop people without as much disposable cash.
People with plenty of money can be time wasters too (as is evident with some of the dating sites out there)
Also paying any money makes some people entitled and they assume they are guaranteed sex because "they paid for it". "
I would far rather Fab was a pay-only site, as it would get rid of the random time wasters overnight, and maybe each demographic in here would do a lot less complaining, and a lot more enjoying  |
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"Guys find it hard getting a profiles to connect to and keep things more interesting than the 100 others in a female/couples inbox. But single females have the pain in the arse task of actually getting time to read though the very small few worth reading after deleting the 100s of worthless ones .
They should have a premium section that you pay more for , would stop the time wasters from being able to message.
No, that wouldn't stop time wasters, it would stop people without as much disposable cash.
People with plenty of money can be time wasters too (as is evident with some of the dating sites out there)
Also paying any money makes some people entitled and they assume they are guaranteed sex because "they paid for it".
I would far rather Fab was a pay-only site, as it would get rid of the random time wasters overnight, and maybe each demographic in here would do a lot less complaining, and a lot more enjoying "
Agree with both.
Only from personal experience of organizing fab socials we have come across a "if I pay for something - will I at least get a bj" mentality, especially from newbies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You just have to persevere just chat on the forums and pay compliments to people who you like - it adds up after - for some it’s quick and others it’s a slow burner! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really isn't that hard for single guys on here.
I see time and time again guys saying it is.
Quite often they they will blame other mens behaviour for their own failings when it's their own behaviour failing them.
I'm not tarring all guys with the same brush but most who complain it's hard have terrible pics and a poor profile. It's your shop window, if it's not appealing no one will come in to browse let alone send a message.
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I agree on this,
We have separate profiles, but I haven't had a meet on mine for years. Its rare I find someone I fancy and click with.
On this profile it's tough too, to find couples that are happy with straight play and where there's 4way attraction.clubs are a better bet if we want to meet a couple.
Lots of messages doesn't mean they are quality.
It's hard for men too I appreciate that as many are frustrated by lack of replies or interest.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its very difficult due to sheer volume of men and the catch 22 of you needing to be verified to meet people yet the only way to get verified is to have met someone.
Any remarks as to how i could improve my profile would be welcome. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its very difficult due to sheer volume of men and the catch 22 of you needing to be verified to meet people yet the only way to get verified is to have met someone.
Any remarks as to how i could improve my profile would be welcome. "
It’s been said many time before but club visits can help.
We and others are often happy to verify friendly guys that seem genuine when we’ve had a chat at a club. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week
"
Absolutely nailed it OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On Fab,women, find it difficult too to find genuine people..
Yes, I get messages, & pics but don't find much chemistry or connection, & if I do they are miles away
But will keep plugging away, as good things come to those who wait.. "
How far away is Halifax….. never too far;) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option.
Not if there's no nuggets.
Some men seem to think women should just accept any offer. I'd rather dry up like a husk than fuck someone I'm not attracted to. "
Agreed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week
Absolutely nailed it OP "
.
Is a snog out the question too?? |
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It can and is hard work and as someone has already posted it is a purely maths problem most times !! reason we can now only meet up on a Sturday night as to busy during the week and refuse to meet the panda gang or the fans of ferry sex gang either !! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week
Absolutely nailed it OP .
Is a snog out the question too??"
Definitely snog you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not that hard though surely?
Deleting dick pics and “hi how’s you” messages takes a few minutes from your day but It’s worth sifting through the spoil to find that occasional nugget.
There’s always the delete account option. "
I wish was that easy I had a clear out a week ago and my inbox is over 400 messages not to mention the winks I’m not moaning about the attention
But it’s hard work tbh think it’s hard work for everyone xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would rather be me as a single guy on this site to being a single woman. Ok I can only from my own perspective but it really hasn’t been that tricky for me, just treat people how you’d like to be treated and accept not everyone will fancy you..
If I was a woman I suspect the volume of unwanted approaches would go up by a magnitude of 10! Sifting the wheat from the chaff and dealing with shitty responses when you’re not interested must be exhausting. |
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By *omer47Man
over a year ago
leigh |
If you're a married man no one wants to know, but if you're a married female, (and there are plenty on here),doing the same thing as the male they will get lots of messages from guys wanting fun with them. |
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week "
Very true, but all those things also happen to men, when they are only 1 in 1000.
Which I guess is why some guys send crap messages as they feel they need to send out 100's to get any attention.
(Don't do this, actually take time and focus on people that you feel you match with and you'll do so much better)
No one has it any harder than anyone else... just different. |
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week
Very true, but all those things also happen to men, when they are only 1 in 1000.
Which I guess is why some guys send crap messages as they feel they need to send out 100's to get any attention.
(Don't do this, actually take time and focus on people that you feel you match with and you'll do so much better)
No one has it any harder than anyone else... just different."
Its different for all
I personally read profiles (shock horror) if you are not what they are looking for then respect their wants and move on.
It takes time to find people you click with and unless you are jewson rome wasnt built in a day.
Happy fabbing all |
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"It is very difficult for a guy on here
I
I would like to ask the men do they meet tvs because they can't fund a single girl"
What makes you think that TV's want to meet men or will accept a bunk up with men if they're also not having much joy on here themselves?
We all have our own desires and reasons that things don't work out as we would hope. |
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"It is very difficult for a guy on here
I
I would like to ask the men do they meet tvs because they can't fund a single girl
What makes you think that TV's want to meet men or will accept a bunk up with men if they're also not having much joy on here themselves?
We all have our own desires and reasons that things don't work out as we would hope."
I'm just asking that's all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There’s a lot of time wasters and fakes lately
Always has been but was easier to spot the fakes in the past
Agree with you on that 100% "
There are wasters and fakes everywhere, on every platform and in real life. Sex and dating in the west has been warped by capitalist ideology. Now it is framed as a game you have to play and win at all cost. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is so wrong with ‘hi how are you’?
That’s part of normal conversation surly?"
If you had thirty messages all saying "hi how are you" would you bother replying? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is so wrong with ‘hi how are you’?
That’s part of normal conversation surly?
If you had thirty messages all saying "hi how are you" would you bother replying? "
I don’t have that problem lol but all the same must mean you are loosing out on some of the good people.
As a man you do feel you can’t win, more direct and you get told your too direct |
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"I see it this way:
If there's a 1000 men for every 1 woman on this site.
300 will not find you attractive and will not message at all.
That leaves us with 700.
500 will be too far away.
Leaves us with 200.
100 will be outside preferred age range.
Leaves us with 100 men to 1 woman. Plenty right?
Now 30 of them are married and playing away. No thanks.
Leaves us with 70.
50 will send a "hi" bland boring message. Zero peaked interest.
Leaves us with 20. 20 to 1 still good odds, right?
10 will send abuse at some point in conversation.
Leaves us with 10.
Chemistry fizzles out with 5. Nothing personal, just not enough attraction.
Leaves us with 5.
Can't align schedules with 3.
Leaves us with 2.
1 doesn't show up for a coffee.
Leaves us with 1.
He doesn't show up for a coffee either because he was expecting a blowjob and got cold feet once he was told there will be no blowjob.
Yeah, women have it so easy.
Can meet any man they want any day of the week "
This but for myself it’s 100 not 1000 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is so wrong with ‘hi how are you’?
That’s part of normal conversation surly?
If you had thirty messages all saying "hi how are you" would you bother replying?
I don’t have that problem lol but all the same must mean you are loosing out on some of the good people.
As a man you do feel you can’t win, more direct and you get told your too direct "
How am I losing out? Men who have a bit more imagination are my type.
I see "you can't win" as a really negative mindset tbh. Lots of guys here do win. Clearly. I don't know what being "more direct" is but I suspect it's FAF. |
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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago
Up North |
"What is so wrong with ‘hi how are you’?
That’s part of normal conversation surly?
If you had thirty messages all saying "hi how are you" would you bother replying?
I don’t have that problem lol but all the same must mean you are loosing out on some of the good people.
As a man you do feel you can’t win, more direct and you get told your too direct "
What do you call direct? |
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"What is so wrong with ‘hi how are you’?
That’s part of normal conversation surly?
If you had thirty messages all saying "hi how are you" would you bother replying?
I don’t have that problem lol but all the same must mean you are loosing out on some of the good people.
As a man you do feel you can’t win, more direct and you get told your too direct "
You don't need more direct, just more personal would help.
Something like this would probably get you much more attention, and isn't exactly hard.
"Hi, love your hair in your photo from the 4th.
I see you're from Birmingham and are looking to experience clubs for the first time. I'm a member of Chams and Xtasia, and would be happy to share my knowledge with you or even meet up with you sometime and show you around.
Oh, I'm xxx by the way, and..." |
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