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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Many people have various stipulations/preferences for certain body types, height, looks etc (As is there right to do so).
In my younger days I was very similar. Would only go for a certain type of look or figure.
One day a family member accused me of being shallow.
After some reflection I decided to open myself up to women who were not my ‘usual type’ physically.
Wow! Did I learn a thing or two….
So, do you think it is a mistake to limit your options or, is swinging based purely on how someone ‘looks’ enough for you?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I know what I do and don't like and stick to that. I have no need to change. "
If it works for you then that’s fine.
Did you arrive at this by trying different types of people or did you have a fixed idea in mind from the start? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Attraction is not something we decide.
Think that about covers it for us  "
Very true but have you ever moved away from the physical attraction and discovered that the mental attraction was there, once you’d conversed with someone? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Attraction is not something we decide.
Think that about covers it for us
Very true but have you ever moved away from the physical attraction and discovered that the mental attraction was there, once you’d conversed with someone?"
I did when I did a blindfold meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know what I do and don't like and stick to that. I have no need to change.
If it works for you then that’s fine.
Did you arrive at this by trying different types of people or did you have a fixed idea in mind from the start?"
No I wouldn't 'try' people I'm not attracted to. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Attraction is not something we decide.
Think that about covers it for us
Very true but have you ever moved away from the physical attraction and discovered that the mental attraction was there, once you’d conversed with someone?
I did when I did a blindfold meet"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not all of someone’s attractiveness is visible. It’s so much about their personality and the connection you have together. "
Very much my thinking these days and where I’m coming from. In particular when using a site such as this.
If you only ever eat the same thing, isn’t your diet boring?  |
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"Attraction is not something we decide.
Think that about covers it for us
Very true but have you ever moved away from the physical attraction and discovered that the mental attraction was there, once you’d conversed with someone?"
He are not interested in playing with what you are….who you are is essential for us.
So without mental connection, we are out….if we are attracted physically and then through negotiations and general getting to know etc we are all feeling the chemistry, then we are in.
But that happens rarely…and we predicted that it would be rare and are happy it is.
Neither of us are taking a bullet, and we wouldn’t want our play mates to either.
Not rocket science for us….swinging doesn’t define us….nor are any two swingers the same….each to their own.
Happiness be it vanilla or otherwise is the journey not the destination …for us…again…each to their own |
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If I'm attracted to someone, I'm not limited by a fab self-ascribed category. People don't walk around with a label either - they just have what I find of interest, or not.
Sex wouldn't be enjoyable with someone who wasn't attractive - for them, as well as me.
There are personalities that affect attraction. The wrong personality is a turnoff, even if physically great. I've yet to find that in reverse. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Attraction is not something we decide.
Think that about covers it for us
Very true but have you ever moved away from the physical attraction and discovered that the mental attraction was there, once you’d conversed with someone?
He are not interested in playing with what you are….who you are is essential for us.
So without mental connection, we are out….if we are attracted physically and then through negotiations and general getting to know etc we are all feeling the chemistry, then we are in.
But that happens rarely…and we predicted that it would be rare and are happy it is.
Neither of us are taking a bullet, and we wouldn’t want our play mates to either.
Not rocket science for us….swinging doesn’t define us….nor are any two swingers the same….each to their own.
Happiness be it vanilla or otherwise is the journey not the destination …for us…again…each to their own "
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Of course we have a pre requisite preference as it's all about attraction in the first instance. Following that there would then need to be a connection.
There's always going to be certain shapes and sizes that simply don't tick a box based on who we are both attracted to. |
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"Of course we have a pre requisite preference as it's all about attraction in the first instance. Following that there would then need to be a connection.
There's always going to be certain shapes and sizes that simply don't tick a box based on who we are both attracted to."
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"Not all of someone’s attractiveness is visible. It’s so much about their personality and the connection you have together. "
I will admit its why I don't arrange meets via fab. As I've met and had great times with people I've said no thanks to on here based on photos but when we met and got to know one another it changed.
However for my group stuff my attraction wants are very different to what I go for 121 |
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