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Naked cleaner
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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This is a serious question for the ladies , if you saw a naked carpet cleaner advertised would you ever be tempted to use that service ?
I have a carpet cleaning business and things are quiet and I thought about going outside my area and trying this , not for shagging purposes but as a potential money makin thing , would ladies be interested do you think or am I away wi the faries ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seen a few adverts before for naked general cleaning so why not for carpets! Sure you would have a few takers, women and men!
* Goes off to run mud all through the house *  "
Thats ok my dogs have just come in from the back garden with muddy feet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is this more than a clothed carpet cleaner????? So you come clean my carpet naked and suck my cock?????"
Just don't talk to him while he's cleaning or it might not be his mouth attached to you  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Seen a few adverts before for naked general cleaning so why not for carpets! Sure you would have a few takers, women and men!
* Goes off to run mud all through the house * "
I could tell you where dirty  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is this more than a clothed carpet cleaner????? So you come clean my carpet naked and suck my cock?????"
I think your mixing me up with the Dyson carpet cleaner  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm... (Spills wine on floor)...I'm not sure...(grinds coffee under foot).... I'd have to think about it (spreads jam around)...I dunno....(releases extra strong coffee from hand) .... Dam!!! We've got laminate... Oh no!!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution "
I think you've put a bit too much thought into that or do you not use the heating in your house and if it was really cold , you'd be seeing less for your money ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We had a guy come and clean our house naked once...he bust the bloody vacuum cleaner ! Decent shag though "
Oh I always use my own equipment 
And i would TRY not to make this a sexual service  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
I think you've put a bit too much thought into that or do you not use the heating in your house and if it was really cold , you'd be seeing less for your money ! "
I've taken a conscious decision to not put the heating on again until I'm of an age when I get heating allowance!
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"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution "
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything."
Damn it, I'm now feeling a wierdo for wearing clothes in the house xx lol
Yep, kepp them feet warm to increase your chances of orgasm by 30% so I hear..! |
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"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything.
Damn it, I'm now feeling a wierdo for wearing clothes in the housexx lol
Yep, kepp them feet warm to increase your chances of orgasm by 30% so I hear..!"
Lol what causes an orgasm ?? how does warm feet help ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything.
Damn it, I'm now feeling a wierdo for wearing clothes in the housexx lol
Yep, kepp them feet warm to increase your chances of orgasm by 30% so I hear..!
Lol what causes an orgasm ?? how does warm feet help ?"
Keep your socks on to boost chances of an orgasm!
Jun 20 2010 by David Owen, The People
KEEP your socks on! A girl’s chances of having an orgasm increase by 30% if her feet are warm, say Dutch scientists. To try something sexier, get your man to massage your feet with a warm gel. He should concentrate on the webbing between toes as they are linked to nerves in the genitals, say reflexologists
lolx Although I am a bit concerned at the concentration on the 'webbing between toes'..not sure where this study was carried out!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything.
Damn it, I'm now feeling a wierdo for wearing clothes in the housexx lol
Yep, kepp them feet warm to increase your chances of orgasm by 30% so I hear..!
Lol what causes an orgasm ?? how does warm feet help ?
Keep your socks on to boost chances of an orgasm!
Jun 20 2010 by David Owen, The People
KEEP your socks on! A girl’s chances of having an orgasm increase by 30% if her feet are warm, say Dutch scientists. To try something sexier, get your man to massage your feet with a warm gel. He should concentrate on the webbing between toes as they are linked to nerves in the genitals, say reflexologists
lolx Although I am a bit concerned at the concentration on the 'webbing between toes'..not sure where this study was carried out!!!"
I could be the semi naked cleaner and wear socks ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Surely this 'naked cleaning' would be a seasonal thing!?
That central heating would need whacking up high leading to the naked cleaning costing an extra few quid in heating bills for the recipient leading to them having to charge you which makes it nothing more than winter prostitution
There speaks a guy who wears clothes in the house lol
Lord no cant work if the heating is on..My heating is On maybe in the evening in winter.
As long as my feet are warm I dont need to wear anything.
Damn it, I'm now feeling a wierdo for wearing clothes in the housexx lol
Yep, kepp them feet warm to increase your chances of orgasm by 30% so I hear..!
Lol what causes an orgasm ?? how does warm feet help ?
Keep your socks on to boost chances of an orgasm!
Jun 20 2010 by David Owen, The People
KEEP your socks on! A girl’s chances of having an orgasm increase by 30% if her feet are warm, say Dutch scientists. To try something sexier, get your man to massage your feet with a warm gel. He should concentrate on the webbing between toes as they are linked to nerves in the genitals, say reflexologists
lolx Although I am a bit concerned at the concentration on the 'webbing between toes'..not sure where this study was carried out!!!
I could be the semi naked cleaner and wear socks ?? "
Ummmm, I think you'll be fine fully naked on account of the sock thing (apparantly) being of benefit to the ladies....pfffttt bloody sexists, as if us guys don't also have trouble orgasming!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....  "
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)"
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!! "
I could
Try just polishing the floors or just dusting for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!!
I could
Try just polishing the floors or just dusting for you "
Hmmmmm.... Can you wash up as well?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!!
I could
Try just polishing the floors or just dusting for you
Hmmmmm.... Can you wash up as well? "
Technically yes but you'd require a dishwasher and I could Load it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!!
I could
Try just polishing the floors or just dusting for you
Hmmmmm.... Can you wash up as well?
Technically yes but you'd require a dishwasher and I could Load it "
No problem...(flicks through Argos catalogue looking at dishwashers)....when will you be starting?......(flicks through b&q website looking at chains and padlocks)
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"[Removed by poster at 28/09/12 19:03:58]
Just about to post something when I slipped on the wine... Got covered in coffee and jam in my hair....
Woohoo, a perfect job for a naked cleaner to come and sort out!
Guess I should go shopping for a pinny then
Hope you didn't sustain any injuries (apart from the jam in the hair which I'm sure was very painful!)
Well no harm done... I was on the phone ordering some carpets!!
I could
Try just polishing the floors or just dusting for you
Hmmmmm.... Can you wash up as well?
Technically yes but you'd require a dishwasher and I could Load it
No problem...(flicks through Argos catalogue looking at dishwashers)....when will you be starting?......(flicks through b&q website looking at chains and padlocks)
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i would love to go naked and clean for a lady naked house cleaning now thats me i would be up for that come message me ladies x"
Oi , I've got the Paton for this idea , I'm
on dragons den next week to show them everything
Hope Hilary is prepared !!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"hey thank you really nice of you but i would hate to take meets of you bhut if one is available thank you very much "
No worries , it's good to share |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"My house needs cleaning top to bottom. I can't pay and I won't be grateful but I could write a glowing reference
I'd rather a verification "
Do a good enough job and I might consider a verification too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I've already bought the carpet, a dishwasher and a pinny... Do I have to buy the mop as well? 
Guess I just need to await the invite then "
No need! I'll bring it all round... I didn't have anywhere to put the carpet so it's in the back of my car ... Along with the dishwasher - which I have already loaded for you (discount?) and I wasn't sure about the pinny so I just bought you a flannel instead! I'll use the key I had cut yesterday.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is a serious question for the ladies , if you saw a naked carpet cleaner advertised would you ever be tempted to use that service ?
I have a carpet cleaning business and things are quiet and I thought about going outside my area and trying this , not for shagging purposes but as a potential money makin thing , would ladies be interested do you think or am I away wi the faries ?? "
Why not it would be a laugh to have the girls round to watch. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"This is a serious question for the ladies , if you saw a naked carpet cleaner advertised would you ever be tempted to use that service ?
I have a carpet cleaning business and things are quiet and I thought about going outside my area and trying this , not for shagging purposes but as a potential money makin thing , would ladies be interested do you think or am I away wi the faries ??
Why not it would be a laugh to have the girls round to watch. "
Oh more than one customer , nice |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well I've already bought the carpet, a dishwasher and a pinny... Do I have to buy the mop as well?
Guess I just need to await the invite then
No need! I'll bring it all round... I didn't have anywhere to put the carpet so it's in the back of my car ... Along with the dishwasher - which I have already loaded for you (discount?) and I wasn't sure about the pinny so I just bought you a flannel instead! I'll use the key I had cut yesterday.... "
I'm liking your style and a pinny would jus get in the way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I've already bought the carpet, a dishwasher and a pinny... Do I have to buy the mop as well?
Guess I just need to await the invite then
No need! I'll bring it all round... I didn't have anywhere to put the carpet so it's in the back of my car ... Along with the dishwasher - which I have already loaded for you (discount?) and I wasn't sure about the pinny so I just bought you a flannel instead! I'll use the key I had cut yesterday....
I'm liking your style and a pinny would jus get in the way "
I'm just parking the car... It's not easy doing a 3 point turn with a roll of carpet in the back!!! I'll leave the flannel behind then?.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i dont need a flannel naked is how i will be and my cleaning is good i will even clean carpets
Sounds like I've been guzzumphed "
I can't hear anything? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i dont need a flannel naked is how i will be and my cleaning is good i will even clean carpets
Sounds like I've been guzzumphed
I can't hear anything? "
Maybe you need to get a bit closer to me then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i dont need a flannel naked is how i will be and my cleaning is good i will even clean carpets
Sounds like I've been guzzumphed
I can't hear anything?
Maybe you need to get a bit closer to me then "
I've already dipped your pockets and taken your wallet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"iam still looking for ladys that would like me to clean naked for them iam available friday all day give me a message and ile come round and clean naked even a group of ladys i dont mind "
Have you thought about starting your own thread then?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"iam still looking for ladys that would like me to clean naked for them iam available friday all day give me a message and ile come round and clean naked even a group of ladys i dont mind
Have you thought about starting your own thread then? "
He doesn't need his own thread , he's jumped on this one pretty well, we may have to team up but he has to stay dressed in the van |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"iam still looking for ladys that would like me to clean naked for them iam available friday all day give me a message and ile come round and clean naked even a group of ladys i dont mind
Have you thought about starting your own thread then?
He doesn't need his own thread , he's jumped on this one pretty well, we may have to team up but he has to stay dressed in the van "
Ha ha ha good idea!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"aww sorry upforfunand games do you want me to start my own thread so sorry please forgive me "
Oh so it's ok to hijack the thread but when I ask you to join the business you want to jump ship straight away.
I'll keep my feather duster for mysel now thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"aww sorry upforfunand games do you want me to start my own thread so sorry please forgive me
Oh so it's ok to hijack the thread but when I ask you to join the business you want to jump ship straight away.
I'll keep my feather duster for mysel now thanks "
Did I pay for that duster? |
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i dont want to jump ship upforfun i will be your partner and be naked cleaner for these ladys if that ok to join your thread no way will i jump thread the going is too good no bluffin here any offers apply withing i will stay clothed wile in the van but then naked in the house |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Seems like I've got my 1st job booked, nervous ? Not really, worse case scenario is I end up in A&E with the Hoover nossle attached to my knob but that's happen to all of us at one point yeah ? |
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