Hi all.
I’m very much new to swinging, even though my profile states I’ve been on the site for a long while. Let me explain.
I have learning disabilities which include Aspergers Syndrome, I have several disabilities and anxiety, this has put me off going swinging or trying new things. I’m not the best looking guy either and I tend to get anxious doing stuff on my own.
I was wondering if there’s anyone near the Nottinghamshire area who I could potentially have a social meet with? And see if it’s something I would like to get into.
I’m really sorry for the long post. I’m straight btw. I’m also into older ladies, I’m 27 and it’s been difficult to find ladies who’re into younger men lol. I like curvy women and BBW ??
Any couples welcome too. Would be great to meet like-minded people.
Kind Regards,
KinkyKeeling |
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Hiya OP...welcome to the world of swinging..although we only started a year before covid so not had a huge amount of experience like some others may have. But we learned very quickly to stay away from certain profiles...one that have no green tick or site supporters.silver/gold badge..you probably know all this..my best advice to you is as a single male is to read every profile before you dive in with a msg...do not message if you feel your not what that person wants..I have heard quite a few story's on here about some men not taking rejection well at all...so keep yourself in check...Most women and couples hate being sent dick pics with a feeble attempt of a message...if they want more pics of you..let them ask, although if there profile is genuine and they want a face pic with a message and your what they are looking for then if your comfortable to send one then it's a good idea. And just have respect which I'm sure you will when contacting women and couples..tell them a bit about yourself..never send a one liner like how you doing today...people tend to like a bit of effort...I really do hope you find what your looking for...but don't be disheartened to much if your ignored or msgs are deleted.. it happens to everyone. |
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Hi, I can really only comment on the being on the spectrum and anxiety side of things from my personal perspective. I don't have to tell how much it interferes with social situations and effects confidence. It makes things very difficult in my experience. However I've found it is what it is and you are who you are. And to be fair I love who I am and wouldn't change me. I'm sure your pretty awesome too and feel the same. Anyway more practically speaking my advice is simply exposure and practice in social situations (on or off the scene). It's really scary and hard work. You have to push yourself, a lot. And learn not to fear mistakes and set back or allow them to damage your confidence. Basically you have to learn the rules of social interaction (which for most people just comes naturally). For example these day I go out my way to make conversations with strangers. I never would have in the past. The more I do socially interact the better I get at it, the less faux pas I make and the more confident I get.
May I recommend if your feeling brave and feel your in the right(ish) place attending a Swingers Social. There's a few organised on here now and then. They tend to be basically a gathering at a pub/function room and an opportunity to get to meet people on the scene face to face in a safe environment. Could be a great opportunity to practice social skills, make freinds and/or create opportunities.
Also really understand that this site is incredibly hard for most single guys. So be you, be the best you can but don't take it hard if you find yourself struggling on here.
Also as side note looking at your profile, in my experience lots of people on the BDSM scene are also on the spectrum. Especially a fair few of the ladies (especially those ladies who take a dominant side). I don't know if it coincidence or not? I personally suspect it may have something to do with why I like it. I find things like planning a session and rigging really feed into the of activities I enjoy.
Mr
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"Hiya OP...welcome to the world of swinging..although we only started a year before covid so not had a huge amount of experience like some others may have. But we learned very quickly to stay away from certain profiles...one that have no green tick or site supporters.silver/gold badge..you probably know all this..my best advice to you is as a single male is to read every profile before you dive in with a msg...do not message if you feel your not what that person wants..I have heard quite a few story's on here about some men not taking rejection well at all...so keep yourself in check...Most women and couples hate being sent dick pics with a feeble attempt of a message...if they want more pics of you..let them ask, although if there profile is genuine and they want a face pic with a message and your what they are looking for then if your comfortable to send one then it's a good idea. And just have respect which I'm sure you will when contacting women and couples..tell them a bit about yourself..never send a one liner like how you doing today...people tend to like a bit of effort...I really do hope you find what your looking for...but don't be disheartened to much if your ignored or msgs are deleted.. it happens to everyone. "
Well said excellent response.x
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"Hiya OP...welcome to the world of swinging..although we only started a year before covid so not had a huge amount of experience like some others may have. But we learned very quickly to stay away from certain profiles...one that have no green tick or site supporters.silver/gold badge..you probably know all this..my best advice to you is as a single male is to read every profile before you dive in with a msg...do not message if you feel your not what that person wants..I have heard quite a few story's on here about some men not taking rejection well at all...so keep yourself in check...Most women and couples hate being sent dick pics with a feeble attempt of a message...if they want more pics of you..let them ask, although if there profile is genuine and they want a face pic with a message and your what they are looking for then if your comfortable to send one then it's a good idea. And just have respect which I'm sure you will when contacting women and couples..tell them a bit about yourself..never send a one liner like how you doing today...people tend to like a bit of effort...I really do hope you find what your looking for...but don't be disheartened to much if your ignored or msgs are deleted.. it happens to everyone. Well said excellent response.x"
Thankyou kindly x |
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