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Body shaming
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Makes you want to delete your profile especially when they are not that great themselves."
No it just makes me give them a reality check of their own. Fab is full of setbacks but just rise above it and tell them some home truths that they probably didn't really want to hear. |
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It reeks of insecurity from them - Not the person they're targeting at.
A polite rejection makes them feel insecure, so their reaction is to attack out of spite and make the other person feel bad about themselves because their advance wasn't welcomed.
If anyone is on the receiving end of it, after politely declining them, remember they approached you because you're attractive... Body shaming is their cheap attempt at bringing you down, when what they're saying is bullshit anyway
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You’ve put up some pictures which will get some guys (or others) very hot under the collar on here and maybe a bit jealous as well.
So they’ll send messages to try to hurt or denigrate you, please ignore them. It happens but its their issue not yours.
Enjoy your time on here and delete, block and report anyone who sends these messages. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thankfully not yet - but I am pretty thick skinned. Some do get pissy when you decline though. But as I always say the world would be a boring place if we all liked the same thing;)"
It was more annoying because before I said I'm afraid the attraction isn't there, they were complimenting my killer curves, I hope they may think twice after I explained exactly why I wasn't interested |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I get people telling me I'm fat.....
No shit Sherlock.
I think chunky is a much more flattering name, you may just mean you have a chunky willy
Have you been looking again? "
Always hun but don't tell my husband |
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Absolutely, I am always polite like you. But if pushed to I will explain why.
It's annoying though - I think it comes from the rejection they go into ' I didn't want you anyway mode'. There was one guy on a dating site I declined kept creating new profiles just to message me and when I would say no he would tell me I was too old and fat anyway. And then que anotjer couple weeks new profile and another message lol. Don't let it get to you |
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I found the best way to stop it happening is to not engage, telling someone your not interest, especially getting into specifics like saying your not attracted to them, will often result in an agressive reply back
So now if I'm not interested it's a simple delete & block |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Absolutely, I am always polite like you. But if pushed to I will explain why.
It's annoying though - I think it comes from the rejection they go into ' I didn't want you anyway mode'. There was one guy on a dating site I declined kept creating new profiles just to message me and when I would say no he would tell me I was too old and fat anyway. And then que anotjer couple weeks new profile and another message lol. Don't let it get to you "
Some people are too childish to be on here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP - for the record - you have a lovely body and the only shaming is that it's a shame i don't get to caress it. "
Thankyou hun, I didn't post this for a sympathy thread but I just wondered how common it is.
Lol I think that chunky willy would be too much for me |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"OP - for the record - you have a lovely body and the only shaming is that it's a shame i don't get to caress it.
Thankyou hun, I didn't post this for a sympathy thread but I just wondered how common it is.
Lol I think that chunky willy would be too much for me "
If you we're on my friends list you'd get your answer to that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I found the best way to stop it happening is to not engage, telling someone your not interest, especially getting into specifics like saying your not attracted to them, will often result in an agressive reply back
So now if I'm not interested it's a simple delete & block"
Tbh 98% of the time people are amazing and take a no thanks really well but it's just that 2% that really let the site down. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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its a common thing after saying no thank no matter what size you are .... but then they have done you a favor by showing themselves to being idiots block job done and when chatting to other couples (not via fab as breaks rules) let others know |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes all the time I go from being the most beautiful thing on the site and the best ass they ever seen
To your just a guy in a dress who want to fuck you
In the space off one no thanks happy swingeing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. "
You have an absolutely incredible body OP and you should ignore anyone who says anything different.
The fact that they body shame you after you reject them should tell you everything you need to know. They’re just kicking out at you because they’re so insecure and have such low self esteem that they can’t handle rejection of any kind. I tend to feel sorry for people like that rather than let them upset me and try to sympathise with them because to have such low self esteem and insecurities normally means they’ve experienced tough times in their past.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep, loads of times to us both, just because we have politely said not for us or not looking at the moment etc. It does make you want to leave fab and look elsewhere for people. I mean if you knocked them back in a bar would they be so disrespectful to us? Prob not but its far to normal on fab |
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"Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. "
Yeap. He even made a fake profile to do it bc i blocked him on his original. But i don't care words don't hurt me. |
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By *yronMan
over a year ago
grangemouth |
I did, but it wasn't in a message: I bumped into the couple in question in a supermarket (they lived near me) and we recognised each other. They then started saying "Like we'd fuck a lardarse like you". I told them to fuck off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's probably because some people think this is a site where everyone says yes to sex and the word no is unheard of. So, rejection is taken badly and they turn it on the rejector to try and make themselves feel better. |
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They were obviously attracted to you enough to try and make a connection but you just bashed their ego and they were twats about it. There's plenty of people who'll like you regardless of stereotypical ideals of beauty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. "
How could anyone body shame you…..? You look real nice |
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"Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. "
Had some guy waffle on about how he better physically than me in everyday cos I called him.out for his crappy behaviour in the forums. Didn't mean squat as he was blocked anyway so couldn't see Jack but yeah, there's some aholes on fab these days.
But you have an amazing bod so screw that pillock and any other tosspot that thinks shit talking people who are not interested is acceptable. |
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By *yronMan
over a year ago
grangemouth |
"I get it all the time and then there’s all the other names that follow….with the added touch of “well I didn’t want to meet you anyway” "
What a shit thing to do. They'd have been more lucky than they deserve to have met you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sadly common. Here and in vanilla life. Fuck em. Not worth getting stressed over. X"
Em... No. Don't fuck 'em. Just tell them to fuck off.
I get quite a bit of shaming after rejection. I smile whilst blocking them. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find that there are nasty ones who can't handle rejection no matter how well mannered you frame it.
Don't let it get you down sweetheart. Hold your head high. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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During a meet I had the female part of the couple get stressed out because the skirt she was planning on wearing was too big... quote ' What am I to do with this skirt, its way to big and only a size 8'. It was aimed directly at me and my size 14 ass.
I've not been a size 8 since I was about 13. I love my curves.
It became apparent during the meet putting people down and body shaming was a big part of their play.
Shaming isn't acceptable under any circumstances |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've seen & heard lots of women commenting that this has happened.
We're always a solid 8/10 when their balls are needing drained but somehow become an ugly/old/fat/wrinkly (delete as appropriate) cow when we knock them back. |
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"I've seen & heard lots of women commenting that this has happened.
We're always a solid 8/10 when their balls are needing drained but somehow become an ugly/old/fat/wrinkly (delete as appropriate) cow when we knock them back."
I doubt anyone would take that seriously about you. Hopefully not least yourself.
If I were called fat or ugly or any names after rejecting someone, I think my reply would be..."Well, you've been rejected by this fat ugly git. Feel any better than being rejected by a hotty ?"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone else been subjected to body shaming after saying that you aren't attracted to them?
I know it happened to my friend on Wednesday and me today but is this kind of thing a regular occurrence on fab as I havent found on previous profiles that this is the case. "
Just people who are childish and can’t accept rejection |
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There have been a number of recent threads with body shaming comments from people trying to pass them off as preferences.
My only direct experience of this was from a woman who contacted me through a verification I had given.
She became very pushy about meeting despite what I say on my profile.
When I wouldn't agree to meet she took it upon herself to contact another of my verifications and tell my fab bestie to back off and stop holding me back.
When I challenged her on this she resorted to body shaming comments directed at my friend.
Most but not all comments I have witnessed aimed at women have been from other women.
I know men can and will resort to it when they are rejected but women are more than capable of it due to their own insecurities, jealousy or just an over inflated ego. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've seen & heard lots of women commenting that this has happened.
We're always a solid 8/10 when their balls are needing drained but somehow become an ugly/old/fat/wrinkly (delete as appropriate) cow when we knock them back.
I doubt anyone would take that seriously about you. Hopefully not least yourself.
If I were called fat or ugly or any names after rejecting someone, I think my reply would be..."Well, you've been rejected by this fat ugly git. Feel any better than being rejected by a hotty ?"
"
I take very little seriously on here....the hyperbolic statements that attempt to blow smoke up my arse or the nasty stuff
That's the trick to surviving Fab I think. |
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"It reeks of insecurity from them - Not the person they're targeting at.
A polite rejection makes them feel insecure, so their reaction is to attack out of spite and make the other person feel bad about themselves because their advance wasn't welcomed.
If anyone is on the receiving end of it, after politely declining them, remember they approached you because you're attractive... Body shaming is their cheap attempt at bringing you down, when what they're saying is bullshit anyway
"
100% this |
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By *scouple07Couple
over a year ago
louth, Ireland |
Unfortunately this happens far too often, usually happens when you say no to them
Happened to us a couple of times off single male profiles that Unfortunately for the genuinely good males it puts people off looking for single males
Mrs Gs |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
" Most but not all comments I have witnessed aimed at women have been from other women.
I know men can and will resort to it when they are rejected but women are more than capable of it due to their own insecurities, jealousy or just an over inflated ego. "
Yep; I'd agree with this. I've never yet been body shamed by a man on here, not even after turning him down. Women? Called a heffalump when someone didn't like what said, bitchy comments about my dress size, blah blah blah.
I think people will try and lash out when they're annoyed and target what they assume would be sensitive. A source of shame in their eyes.
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It happens unfortunately, it's the blinking ones to spout bile in the middle of the night and then block you get me. Why feel the need to be so vile when we've never even spoken. It's hard but you do harden up to it eventually, even though it still stings. |
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By *asha86Couple
over a year ago
walsall |
Its happened to us in the past but find 95% of people on here tend to be ok if we say sorry not for us. The way i see it we have one body and its what weve got to work with!
I would never body shame anyone its cruel and you would never know what impact that could have on someone.
I wouldnt like it so wouldnt do it to others! Treat others how you would like to be treated thats what i say! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It happens unfortunately, it's the blinking ones to spout bile in the middle of the night and then block you get me. Why feel the need to be so vile when we've never even spoken. It's hard but you do harden up to it eventually, even though it still stings. "
Had one this morning. Such a joy to wake up to |
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"It happens unfortunately, it's the blinking ones to spout bile in the middle of the night and then block you get me. Why feel the need to be so vile when we've never even spoken. It's hard but you do harden up to it eventually, even though it still stings.
Had one this morning. Such a joy to wake up to "
Really isn't a nice way to start the day. Plus it's a bit pathetic to be mean and then block. At least have the courage of your convictions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I found the best way to stop it happening is to not engage, telling someone your not interest, especially getting into specifics like saying your not attracted to them, will often result in an agressive reply back
So now if I'm not interested it's a simple delete & block
Tbh 98% of the time people are amazing and take a no thanks really well but it's just that 2% that really let the site down."
You say the 2% let the site down, it's not the site or you that's at fault it's the people that can't take rejection.
I'm not for everyone and I always say thanks for the reply and have fun if I'm rejected |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had it a couple of times but generally guys are cool. I'd not give the few that behave like that validation just focus on the good guys, there's wayyy more of them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I found the best way to stop it happening is to not engage, telling someone your not interest, especially getting into specifics like saying your not attracted to them, will often result in an agressive reply back
So now if I'm not interested it's a simple delete & block
Tbh 98% of the time people are amazing and take a no thanks really well but it's just that 2% that really let the site down.
You say the 2% let the site down, it's not the site or you that's at fault it's the people that can't take rejection.
I'm not for everyone and I always say thanks for the reply and have fun if I'm rejected"
No it's the small amount that use the site opposed to the site itself, just to clarify |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What was it they said
R"
It was along the lines of "well we generally prefer less curvy women anyway" more looking for gym fit.
Well my pics are a true reflection of me and they were the ones who winked and messaged, but considering what others have had it is nothing and to make it clear I did let them know exactly why the attraction wasn't there after so they had a few home truths levelled at them so it really is water of a ducks back. |
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"What was it they said
R
It was along the lines of "well we generally prefer less curvy women anyway" more looking for gym fit.
Well my pics are a true reflection of me and they were the ones who winked and messaged, but considering what others have had it is nothing and to make it clear I did let them know exactly why the attraction wasn't there after so they had a few home truths levelled at them so it really is water of a ducks back. "
They didn't want to meet you so they probably weren't that arsed
R |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What was it they said
R
It was along the lines of "well we generally prefer less curvy women anyway" more looking for gym fit.
Well my pics are a true reflection of me and they were the ones who winked and messaged, but considering what others have had it is nothing and to make it clear I did let them know exactly why the attraction wasn't there after so they had a few home truths levelled at them so it really is water of a ducks back.
They didn't want to meet you so they probably weren't that arsed
R"
They did want to meet though, that's the point, until I said that I didn't. |
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"What was it they said
R
It was along the lines of "well we generally prefer less curvy women anyway" more looking for gym fit.
Well my pics are a true reflection of me and they were the ones who winked and messaged, but considering what others have had it is nothing and to make it clear I did let them know exactly why the attraction wasn't there after so they had a few home truths levelled at them so it really is water of a ducks back.
They didn't want to meet you so they probably weren't that arsed
R
They did want to meet though, that's the point, until I said that I didn't. "
I was referring to when they no longer. I really don't think you giving them home truths would matter. Probably made you feel better tho
R |
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