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Sex toys gone wrong.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So. When I was with my ex we were playing with a teeny silver bullet and it kind of got to a place where he couldn't grasp it. He said you may have to go hospital
Obviously I said to him, I don't care what gets it out I'm not off to fucking hospital in a&e vibrating where they pool a team of Drs to have a laugh.
Thankfully he got it out and we were all fine.
Be a dare devil ?? share your awkward sex toy moments.
Go .....,...... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Being experimental I shoved a love egg up my arse, didn't intend for it to slip completely in  nearly broke my bog when I eventually managed to (quite literally) fire it out  "
I found love eggs to be useless. Popped em in and walked round the house and they fell out. I've been told I'm quite tight down there so I was lost
Just glad I didn't put em in at s club  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her."
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly  |
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I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly "
Yes, it was a bit of passion-killer, but thankfully didn’t stop her interest in experimenting! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So. When I was with my ex we were playing with a teeny silver bullet and it kind of got to a place where he couldn't grasp it. He said you may have to go hospital
Obviously I said to him, I don't care what gets it out I'm not off to fucking hospital in a&e vibrating where they pool a team of Drs to have a laugh.
Thankfully he got it out and we were all fine.
Be a dare devil ?? share your awkward sex toy moments.
Go .....,......"
You don't ask the Doctors to remove it, you just ask them
to change the batteries...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
"
He fit an whole apple in.
I love fisting but I'm sure I'd dry up if an apple came near it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Our last meet with a couple , getting playful on the bed and the male used glass ball inside me. Only to then realise he'd pushed it in too much and I'd tightened around it and it wouldn't come out!!
30 mins later and it came out. Safe to say it killed the mood for that night xx |
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"I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
He fit an whole apple in.
I love fisting but I'm sure I'd dry up if an apple came near it "
Haha I double fisted him so yes an apple was not a problem, well it would of been if he had to push it out . Apples are definitely not a good idea |
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"I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
He fit an whole apple in.
I love fisting but I'm sure I'd dry up if an apple came near it "
The apple is the first bit, then the branch and trunk |
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By *omer47Man
over a year ago
leigh |
A friend of mines mother wanted sex with me so I asked if she had any toys, she said she had a vibrator so she got it and I started toying her arse with it while I was licking her pussy but things went wrong when the end of the vibrator came off in my hand as I pushed it up and twisted it at the same time. I stopped licking her and paid more attention to getting this vibrator out of her arse without her realising what was happening. The whole 8inches was inside her, obvious not vibrating now as I had the end in my hand. I finally got it out by stretching her arse with my fingers so I could grip either side of the vibrator, pulleditout,screwed the end back on then fucked her without her even knowing. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When we were in school there was a couple who became very famous after their trip to A+E when his foreskin attached itself to her fixed braces "
Ouch |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Our last meet with a couple , getting playful on the bed and the male used glass ball inside me. Only to then realise he'd pushed it in too much and I'd tightened around it and it wouldn't come out!!
30 mins later and it came out. Safe to say it killed the mood for that night xx"
I just have a vision of 4 people with the Simpsons side glances
That's so funny. |
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly "
Imagine what the banana looked like |
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly
Imagine what the banana looked like "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly
Imagine what the banana looked like "
Da dum. Introducing the Dad joke  |
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"I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
He fit an whole apple in.
I love fisting but I'm sure I'd dry up if an apple came near it
The apple is the first bit, then the branch and trunk "
That’s literally what it looked like when I was pulling it out |
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"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly
Imagine what the banana looked like
Da dum. Introducing the Dad joke "
Thank you I’m here all week, try the veal |
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We once saw a video of a girl firing strawberries out of her bum and thought it looked hot. Tried it and the first strawberry got stuck, so sent in another one to chase it out, that also got stuck. Had to wait a few hours until they decided to leave naturally haha. |
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"We once saw a video of a girl firing strawberries out of her bum and thought it looked hot. Tried it and the first strawberry got stuck, so sent in another one to chase it out, that also got stuck. Had to wait a few hours until they decided to leave naturally haha. "
Hahaha. What was the theory behind the second one up? It would link arms with the first one? |
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"We once saw a video of a girl firing strawberries out of her bum and thought it looked hot. Tried it and the first strawberry got stuck, so sent in another one to chase it out, that also got stuck. Had to wait a few hours until they decided to leave naturally haha.
Hahaha. What was the theory behind the second one up? It would link arms with the first one?"
Not quite sure to be honest, thought it might increase the pressure inside or something and make it easier to evacuate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was down the rabbit hole on porn you know click the next video in the random select bit
Came across a video whare a woman used a pussy pump on her bum hole though to my self that’s not something you see everyday bet that make a awesome pic for fab
Oderd one it came though grate let’s try it out and get a pic later on
It worked but my bum hole swolle shut and was massive hour later and it was still the same
The fear hit me that it wasn’t going to go down
Took 16 hours and 6 ice packs to bring it back to normal never did get a pic
Note to self never do that again
Left me with a black and blue ass hole for weeks
part off it can be seen in my pics 30 November 2020 the rest is hidden by a butt plug |
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"We once saw a video of a girl firing strawberries out of her bum and thought it looked hot. Tried it and the first strawberry got stuck, so sent in another one to chase it out, that also got stuck. Had to wait a few hours until they decided to leave naturally haha.
Hahaha. What was the theory behind the second one up? It would link arms with the first one?
Not quite sure to be honest, thought it might increase the pressure inside or something and make it easier to evacuate. "
Such a sexy arse I would have inserted the full contents of the Punnet |
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"I once had to retrieve an apple from a boyfriends anus, not a problem for him as fisting was quite enjoyable, I on the other hand was panicking a little that I couldn’t get the slippery fellow out. Was fun though but could of been awkward
He fit an whole apple in.
I bet that gave him an extra stretch apple hand round it getting pulled out
I love fisting but I'm sure I'd dry up if an apple came near it
The apple is the first bit, then the branch and trunk
That’s literally what it looked like when I was pulling it out "
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"Was down the rabbit hole on porn you know click the next video in the random select bit
Came across a video whare a woman used a pussy pump on her bum hole though to my self that’s not something you see everyday bet that make a awesome pic for fab
Oderd one it came though grate let’s try it out and get a pic later on
It worked but my bum hole swolle shut and was massive hour later and it was still the same
The fear hit me that it wasn’t going to go down
Took 16 hours and 6 ice packs to bring it back to normal never did get a pic
Note to self never do that again
Left me with a black and blue ass hole for weeks
part off it can be seen in my pics 30 November 2020 the rest is hidden by a butt plug "
Dead |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was down the rabbit hole on porn you know click the next video in the random select bit
Came across a video whare a woman used a pussy pump on her bum hole though to my self that’s not something you see everyday bet that make a awesome pic for fab
Oderd one it came though grate let’s try it out and get a pic later on
It worked but my bum hole swolle shut and was massive hour later and it was still the same
The fear hit me that it wasn’t going to go down
Took 16 hours and 6 ice packs to bring it back to normal never did get a pic
Note to self never do that again
Left me with a black and blue ass hole for weeks
part off it can be seen in my pics 30 November 2020 the rest is hidden by a butt plug Dead "
Now looking back on it yes then god no all that keep going though my head was how do I explain this in a and e lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When we were in school there was a couple who became very famous after their trip to A+E when his foreskin attached itself to her fixed braces "
That one post that makes you regret reading x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Experimenting with an ex, I ate a banana out of her pussy when it broke in half. We spent a good half an hour trying to fish out pieces of mushy banana from her.
That's hilarious. It'd be all brown n ugly
Imagine what the banana looked like
Da dum. Introducing the Dad joke
Thank you I’m here all week, try the veal "
Veal, parmesan and a warm Chianti! |
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